back to article TalkTalk sees red after chucking £75m on restructuring bonfire

Beleaguered Brit ISP TalkTalk's half-year results have plunged into the red, reporting pre-tax losses of £75m due to major restructuring costs. Sales fell 5 per cent to £856m from £902m the year before. The firm attributed a chunk of those losses to a £31m bill in associated costs for overhauling its mobile phone business …

  1. Alastair Dodd 1

    hopefully

    This:

    "TalkTalk also took a £59m exceptional charge for costs "associated with implementing changes to the Group's organisational structure under the new leadership team"

    Included putting someone in charge of user data security who actually gives and damn and will fix it for their customers. But I doubt it.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: hopefully

      It did.

      1. hplasm
        Meh

        Re: hopefully

        "It did."

        After paying £58.9M to Dido as bye-bye money...

  2. FatGerman

    "Our clear value proposition is resonating strongly against an uncertain economic environment"

    What the effing toss does that shit even mean? What kind of lobotomy is required to make people talk like that?

    1. Ol'Peculier

      The kind that TalkTalk customers have had, otherwise why would they choose them as an ISP?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "What the effing toss does that shit even mean?"

      It means someone in marketing thinks it's clever to use technical terms like "resonate", "economic" and "environment" and used a buzzword generator. See also "interface".

      1. Commswonk

        Re: "What the effing toss does that shit even mean?"

        One thing it means... I will have to go and buy a new bullshit detector because that little lot damaged the existing one BER*.

        * No, not Bit Error Rate... Beyond Economic Repair - a much older use of the abbreviation.

    3. Ken Moorhouse Silver badge

      Re: resonating strongly

      Isn't that what the Tacomas Narrow Bridge (aka Galloping Gertie) was famous for?

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-zczJXSxnw

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Eh?

    "Chief exec Tristia Harrison said: "When we simplified and reset the business in May we said our priorities were growth, cash and [earnings before interest, taxes, depreciation and amortization] in that order."

    I thought they said that customer security was their number one priority? So, which one is it then - there doesn't seem to be mention of a single cost associated with improving security.

    1. Chris King

      Re: Eh?

      "Chief exec Tristia Harrison said: "When we simplified and reset the business in May we said our priorities were growth, cash and [earnings before interest, taxes, depreciation and amortization] in that order."

      That just means:

      1. Find more customers

      2. Squeeze existing customers

      3. Fiddle the books to look better on paper

      Yeah, I didn't see "improve our security" in there either.

      1. SkippyBing

        Re: Eh?

        You'll also note, that 'Provide a half decent service' doesn't appear anywhere in that list. Which tells you all you need to know about that bunch of shysters.

  4. Tridac

    Couldn't happen to a nicer company...

    1. DJV Silver badge
      Trollface

      Yes, I'm so sad for them

      HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! SNORT! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! GUFFAW! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!

  5. adam payne

    TalkTalk also took a £59m exceptional charge for costs "associated with implementing changes to the Group's organisational structure under the new leadership team".

    How the hell can you spend that much?

    Chief exec Tristia Harrison said: "When we simplified and reset the business in May we said our priorities were growth, cash and [earnings before interest, taxes, depreciation and amortization] in that order.

    I thought security was one of your priorities but it looks like you've forgotten about that, or you don't want to say the S word so that everybody forgets. Some people won't forget Talk Talk.

    "Our clear value proposition is resonating strongly against an uncertain economic environment and underpins our plan to simplify and focus all our investment in delivering affordable, reliable fixed connectivity to both homes and businesses.

    Oh my buzz word overload again. So basically you are trying to say that in an uncertain pre-brexit you are trying to deliver value for money for your customers.

  6. Fihart

    At least you don't have to sit in the same room as these jerks.

    In advertising one occasionally had meetings with Marketing grads in their first job as brand managers. They spouted a lot words which individually probably meant something but together made no sense to any of us on the actual working side of the table.

    Didn't matter, as we just created the sort of ads we thought best and they then put them out to focus groups and we never heard about them again.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Wafflers

    Couldnt find a better bunch of liars and male bovine excreeters. The place is run by sadists and mediocrity loving critters.

  8. Teiwaz

    ''Beleagered'???

    Not how I'd describe Talk Talk in any state.

    I'd save it for the low level staff working for this organisation managed by monkeys.

  9. peterm3
    Go

    TalkTalk is actually quite good

    I was a TalkTalk customer for a good few years, the price was low, unlimited data and alltogether cheap and cheerful. The router they provided was pretty basic, but with the savings I could afford a really good Asus one.

    I only changed at I found a deal for £1 a month for EE via MoneySavingExpert.

    I don't have any interest in TalkTalk, and the Dido lady sounded like a useless upper class idiot (now in the House of Lords?) but the company seems to be OK. Perhaps Three (Hutchison) could take it over?

    1. SkippyBing

      Re: TalkTalk is actually quite good

      It really isn't. I once spent several hours on the phone going through their fault finding check list to discover that my router wasn't working and needed replacing. Which I'd told them at the start of the call with a break down of the diagnostics I'd tried to reach that conclusion.

      Then there was the special three month subscription to some movie service that I didn't know about and never used, but was billed for after the three month intro and which they refused to refund despite admitting I'd never used it.

      And then they tried to charge me an early departure penalty after they'd leaked my, and several thousand other people's, details onto the internet.

      Providing an internet service isn't hard, after all Open Reach do most of the work, it's providing a vaguely tolerable customer experience that Talk Talk failed at.

    2. Sam Therapy
      Mushroom

      Re: TalkTalk is actually quite good

      No they ain't. not even nearly. For them, mediocrity is an impossible goal.

      For a variety of reasons, I'm stuck with these idiots for now and they really are the most useless shower of bastards outside the current Conservative front bench.

      Almost every single employee I've had the misfortune to deal with appears to be a weapons grade idiot. I say "almost" because, just the odd few times, I've spoken to someone who has a more than room temp IQ and appears to give a shite.

      Roll on the day I can ditch these useless fucksticks.

  10. Cuddles

    Number one priority

    "our priorities were growth, cash and earnings... The first half performance shows we are delivering on that plan. We have now delivered a third consecutive quarter of growth in our broadband base"

    "Sales fell 5 per cent to £856m from £902m the year before."

    One of these things is not like the other. Dropping 5% in revenue is pretty much the exact opposite of growth.

  11. HmmmYes

    Oh you missed the best bits.

    From FTAV, reporting the statement:

    'The 49-year-old, who drinks hot water as coffee makes her “too hyper”, will now step back from the City to pursue public service roles after Sir Charles Dunstone, TalkTalk founder, reasserted control. She says she has no interest in running another listed company.'

    Where did this captain of industry come from?

    ' Ms Harding, who later became a Conservative peer adopting the name Baroness Harding of Winscombe, studied philosophy, politics and economics at Oxford university, where she was an contemporary of David Cameron, and later earned an MBA from Harvard Business School. She is married to John Penrose, a Conservative MP.

    She initially made her name in horseracing as the owner of Cool Dawn, which won the Cheltenham Gold Cup in 1998. That led to her joining the board of the Jockey Club and she attributes her career in business to the success of the “old horse”.'

  12. MrKrotos

    TalkTalk

    Can burn in Hell for all I care!

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon