Volterman 'super wallet': The worst crowdsource video pitch of all time? Do you need a "smart" wallet with a built in front-facing camera and GPS? Of course you don't. Not even with a built-in Wi-Fi hotspot? Well, enough people do to make a success of an Indiegogo project promising just that. The Volterman "smart wallet" has smashed its target of a relatively meagre $45,000 by 1,145 per cent, …
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"So this is targeted at forgetful, know fuck-nothing about technology, bearded hipsters? Or more precisely their wallets?"
IndieGoGo - the place where shysters go to fleece bearded hipsters, by offering to solve a first-world problem they never knew they had in the first place.
If it's got a feckin' huge battery in it, uses the word "smart" in the description or starts talking about "nanoparticles" like they're some miracle product, a project is probably overselling itself.
Pint, because we probably need a drinking game for IndieGoGo product descriptions.
Well, it's only charging "up to 100%". Dammit, if it went to 11, I might have considered it, but like that?
(The only vaguely realistic part I see is the mutual distance alert, range of RFID might be too short for pocket-to-pocket distance, but low-power BT would do. But then, if I could be bothered to look for it, somebody's probably hacked Miibands to do that already.)
"All these things sound like a great idea, until you accidently cut off your own goolies in a trouser-fastening accident."
They are a great idea because they can help with improving the gene pool. Which might be the real hidden agenda...
BTW, did you know that hipsters are genetic hybrids?
For someone like myself, who does not much care for the ridiculous breadth of features stuffed into modern cellphones (i want a phone, just a phone dammit), this concept wouldn't be too insane. I've previously thought about building something with modest overlap, basically mating a cellular hotspot to a powerbank, possibly including some sort of wired ethernet capability. Also, why not double down with the Forkdrillknifewrench? You can enjoy a multi-course meal while cleaning out the P-traps!
You know those vests with pockets? Sort of gillets? Like the "floatation-vest" Marty wears? I've sometimes thought of having one of them with a massive power-pack in the back, armoured, of course, with charger pockets for the Apple Watch, all sorts of phones, e-book-readers and tablets and maybe even a laptop.
Add this to a vambrace computer that uses near-field finger detection as its HID and cross-interference lasers to form a display above the arm and "wearable" begins to actually mean something.
The power pack would need to suck up solar and leech from any nearby mains by induction, of course, in addition to having a regular plug.
At first glance, despite Hipsterman's ridiculous pitch, there are actually a few desirable features being proposed, but I am dubious about the practicality of the whole thing, in terms of implementation and cost. It does integrate several items that I sometimes carry around when I travel. And I did leave my phone on my windscreen again last night (doh).
But my wallet is already thick enough without adding a battery and a bunch of electronics; I just can't see any way that this thing is going to be something I actually want to squeeze into my pocket. And how's that global wi-fi hotspot going to work? Is that just basically an embedded MiFi that you're going to buy a local SIM card for wherever you, or are they talking about something more interesting? And you're now going to add your wallet to the list of things you have to charge up every day?
I will be amazed if this ever actually sees the light of day.
My guess is a bluetooth connection to your phone, so you can share your phones wifi with the device, then connect your phone to it via wifi. As a bonus they've solve perpetual motion.
Why would anybody want this? I reject wallets because the leather is too thick, I don't want to be sitting on a 2600mah battery ( possibly an 18650? Roughly double the volume of an AA ).
So if your phone and wallet move out of range of each other an alarm sounds (wallet in taxi, and wallet on table scenarios)? So why didn't the wallet beep in the taxi? It is now out of range of the phone?
Also wondering how the walllet's anti-thief camera gets its photos to the telephone? Does it have to be connected to a wi-fi hotspot, or is it as Tony72 said above, it has its own SIM and network connection? What are the privacy implications of always being 'on-line'.
Finally, if I ever found a wallet I would open it to see if there is any owner information to return it. Not every one who finds a wallet is a thief and to call the camera an anti-thief camera is quite insulting - especially considering the company are trying to extract money from people with a product which seems unlikely to make the light of day with the specs / design as promised by the mock up in the video.
About a decade ago, on a night out and having consumed a decent percentage of my bodyweight in alcohol I managed to leave my wallet in the taxi on the way home. It was a hackney cab so I couldn't even call the taxi company to see if it had been handed in. I duly wrote it off as a loss, cancelled cards etc...A few days later I received a package through the mail - my wallet, with all the cards and the (admittedly small amount of) notes and change still in there and a note from the Post Office saying the taxi driver had handed it in to them and they had sent it over to the address on my driver's license.
There are good people out there and the thought of an 'anti-thief' camera seems insulting to me too.
With all of the electronics and batteries that thing is not going to fit into a pocket and leave any room for the usual wallet items like money and credit cards and ID.
I also got a right laugh out of: "This is Rob. At first glance he's just a regular guy."
No he's not, he's a bearded hipster.
Rob won't buy this. It would need to be steampunked or artisanal, or shiny white to match his earbuds.
Couldn't get past 30 seconds. Do not want, do not need.
What kind of people would actually buy into this? That's the part I don't get, try to think this through for a moment and you'll soon see all the nonsense which is being shared here.
So the moment you open this contraption to find the rightful owner it'll take pictures of you? Good to know, thanks for the warning upfront. I'll remember this when taking a nice walk through the forest with my girlfriend:
"No honey! Just leave that thing lying there in the middle of no where, the owner can track it down with the internal GPS"
"But what if its batteries are dead?"
"Yeah, not our problem. Or do you want to risk being photographed and possibly treated online as some kind of criminal? Good luck explaining the mindless "social" media masses that you were trying to find a home address".
"Oh wow, you're fully right. Thanks for saving me, superman!"
"I'm not a superman, I just know these scammerman wallets. You know what? Littering is against the law, lets just throw it into the garbage can over there where it belongs. There, all safe and clean!".
"What kind of people would actually buy into this?"
The same kind of people who looked at the Apple Watch and thought "Yeah, this is definitely a must-have item. Finally, for just £300, I can avoid the inconvenience of reaching into my own pocket to look at my phone".
It is not hard to convince people to buy stupid shit they don't need to fix minor problems they don't have, which is why even salesmen are capable of doing it.
Some of this functionality would have been nice in my wife's case after she left her wallet in a rental car she returned to the airport (just last night). She discovered it while going to her gate. If her phone had barked at her 33 feet away from the car, she would have been tipped off. The other features (especially the honkin' battery pack) are fairly useless.
The video does point out a flaw in the design though. If tied to your phone and it really works, you should never lose your wallet (or phone) and allow someone to pilfer it. You will know you are about 30 feet away when it goes walkabout.
Just the funding page, right at the bottom are the prices.
Bifold wallet $248 so roughly £200 inc vat
Most I every carry is about £100 so the wallet is worth twice what cash I put in it. When mine wears out I'll get another for about £15 or less off eBay....
They also do a set, bifold, card wallet, wireless charger, travel wallet for only $760!!!!!
How long does a normal leather wallet last the average guy? I get through a wallet every year or so. By 6 months it looks pretty gnarly and bent up (front pocket guy). Just how...
The whole idea should have stopped at that point but...hipsters.
The other thing I don't buy, is that this thing will have any realistic battery life... I presume the WiFi hot spot will be always on, given there are no controls on the wallet (or will this be turned on using an App controlled by low power BlueTooth?) I presume the wallet will use Bluetooth for the out of range detection. Plus it's running GPS when it's out of range, BT and GPS erode batteries fairly quickly. So how many hours will it manage to ping home for, before the BT, GPS and cell broadcasts deplete the battery?
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