back to article Don't have a Dirty COW, man: Android gets full kernel hijack patch

Google has posted an update for Android that, among other fixes, officially closes the Dirty COW vulnerability. The December 2016 update covers a total of 74 CVE-listed security vulnerabilities in Android devices. These fixes should be landing on Nexus handsets devices very soon, if not already, and installed as soon as …

  1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

    Tileki! Tekili-Li!

    This penguin seems vaguely threatening.

  2. Adam 1

    I assumed this would have been fixed long ago

    At least there is no way for an evil app could get itself root access. Oh wait....

    Come on Chocolate Factory. You get all 90 days on other vendors.

    1. diodesign (Written by Reg staff) Silver badge

      Re: I assumed this would have been fixed long ago

      It was an optional/supplemental fix in Nov. It's now, in December, in the core patch set.


  3. Barry Rueger

    Also, unicorns

    other devices should be getting the updates shortly, depending on how on-the-ball your manufacturer and cell network is.

    Serious question for you El Reg: why bother printing nonsense like this when we all know that some large proportion of Android users - a majority I'd wager - will never see this patch.

    The time has come to start naming and shaming the manufacturers and carriers that put their customers at risk.

    1. diodesign (Written by Reg staff) Silver badge

      Re: Also, unicorns

      F'king hell, we can't win. We point out updates may eventually make their way to devices and get yelled at for being too soft. We point out that millions of devices go unpatched due to crappy manufacturers + network, and we get yelled at for being too cynical and biased.

      Obviously, you know the score. Everyone knows the score. I've tweaked the sentence. Now you can deal with the fandroids. I'm done here.


      1. Roo

        Re: Also, unicorns

        "F'king hell, we can't win."

        Nah, you won my heart, thanks for the heads up. :)

      2. Dr Spork

        Elsewhere... in the realm of grown-up computing...

        "Meanwhile, as one major Linux kernel hole is fixed, another was discovered, patched and publicized."

        "Users and administrators should patch their Linux systems as soon as an update for their distro becomes available, if they haven't already done so. A fix for the flaw was not included in this month's Android update. ®"

        FTFY 0:-)

        All my systems patched themselves for this two days ago. Before those cynical, biased bastards at El Reg had even noticed anything was happening. I dare say all the other top-tier distros are similarly fully patched too.

      3. Anonymous Coward

        Re: Also, unicorns

        I think diodesign has had a rough day...c'mon, have a hug!

        You should know by now 80% of the posters are so up there own arses they think <insert OS / Device / software> is the best thing every any anyone else is a Muppet.

        The rest of us have seen it all before and realise none of it really matters in the grand scheme of things, most people only realise this when they finally grow up and I'm not talking when your 21.

        Just ignore them, be a snarky as you want, light the fuse,and watch the morons explode.

        Actually 80% is a bit low. Try 90%

        1. Teiwaz

          Re: Also, unicorns, Muppets

          Did someone say 'muppet'?

          - Now I have a craving for a few episodes of Fraggle Rock, dammit...

          ...croons pathetically, 'halfway up the stair....'

      4. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

        Re: Also, unicorns

        > F'king hell, we can't win.

        The last time that was possible was somewhat before WWI, I think.

  4. Tom Paine

    I'm not a fanboy...

    I've got an Android phone, and I know perfectly well that it's security is a crock of shit. Same as all other phones, including iPhones (but in a different way.) Everything's fucked, we're all doomed, mine's a double gin and slimline tonic with ice but no lemon. Cheers!

  5. Anonymous South African Coward Bronze badge

    Hardy har har. Our telcos here in South Africa doesn't push security updates through to us plebs, because they are afraid it will break their lovely little network...

    Bah, humbug and fol-de-rol.

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