
Furkin euphemisms
It is the realigning business objectives with the pipeline bullshit that will do for us. It makes me want to take to the barricades and I don't even work for them.
Trigger-happy CSC is aiming the redundancy gun at another batch of hapless employees just in time for Chrimbo – a fate perhaps only slightly worse than actually working at the integrator over the festive season. Hard-pressed staff were this week made aware of a third round of job cuts for 2016 – earlier rounds came in May and …
"Reshaping our delivery structures in some areas to better align with business opportunities and areas of growth"
Yep - Shareholders want their pound of flesh and we will hand it to them on a silver platter. Although I wonder about the use of the word Growth, here...ahh screw it. Sounds good.
"Addressing overcapacity to better align our pipeline with demand"
I mean, we did have some contracts end so those staff are expendible really.
"Addressing areas where headcount can be reduced with little or no business impact"
Yeah - get this. So obviously we can still retain the same 'level' of service with less staff. Who knew?
"Ensuring our cost base is proportionate for the business it is supporting"
So get this, we can state the same thing three different ways. Lucky for me I get paid by the word.
"Continuing to make use of offshore capability to increase competitiveness where appropriate"
Yeah. Because offshoring, which we now can prove doesn't work, is ace. It means that things go wrong, which means that our clients need our services to make it right! Bonus - then we can hire more guys so we can then do the whole thing again....
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I like to think of myself as a nice, tolerant guy.
Those 5 points make me want to hunt down whoever wrote those and strap them to a chair, then force them to watch the British Bake Off final over and over and over and over and over and over whilst playing them 'I Will Always Love You' with a variying pitch control effect.
Or make them work for Accenture HR. Can't decide which is worse.
CSC
Continously Screwing Clients.
The reward for jumping rather than waiting to be pushed is less than 3 grand.
How can you have simultaneous overcapacity in both Sales and in Business Services? It seems to me that if one is over capacity, the other probably needs a boost.
But despite all the words about transformation, this is just yet more harvesting of resources that have been built up over time to hand money back to the shareholders (which most certainly includes those who are making the decisions) in the short term.
Zero hours contracts.
Searched by security in and out, had to wait in a queue not paid/compensated for
No training or promotion prospects.
No eye protection when using smart water or other substances.
Had to provide own tools.
Employees terrified to approach management or HR, speak and your fired attitude
Amazingly they were winning government IT projects from BBC to NHS, wonder if they ever inspected the employment conditions.
...we are cutting costs so that we can make our numbers (or at least pretend we did) and keep our shareholders happy.
When will businesses learn that they cannot cut their way to prosperity?
The euphemisms seem to be getting worse across the big corporates - I have received emails announcing redundancies (although not actually using the word) that do not contain a single negative wors.
They are paying HPE in excess of £2Bn and issuing HPE shareholders with 50% of the shares in a new company formed from the CSC and ES pieces.
The operative word here is Spin. It is being spun as a merger to get around US tax rules the reality is that CSC just assimilated ES and took the chance to rebrand itself.
Agreed; technically it is a 'spin-merge' using a Reverse Morris Trust but the reality is as you describe.
Not sure that the rebrand will actually occur - it would be much cheaper (and still within the rules) to simply name NewCo 'CSC' - the name, logo, brand and stock ticker already exist, why go to the expense of changing it?
It would be worth noting here that CSC are not buying HPE ES, it is a spin merger and creation of a NewCo.
Does it really matter who is buying who? Whichever it is, they are doomed to rinse and repeat this every few months until their whole business here is just a holding company and every worker is in India.
No UK/EU Employees equals lower costs and this more profit for those who remain.
Will the last one out please disconnect the leccy. No screwdrivers provided.
Worked at a firm back in the 90's that sold computers and provided services. (I am in the US but posting anonymously for obvious reasons.) The company was pretty big, it needed to be cut down a bit. So the new CFO sent out a memo less than a month before Christmas saying, basically, everyone's job was on the line and there were going to be staff reductions. What I call the "Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas, You're All Going to be Fired" memo. Nastiest thing I think I've ever seen. Funny thing, by February, so many staff had self-selected to find other work, the headcount had reduced to the point where nobody needed to let go. The obvious fly in the ointment: Only the best employees were able to find employment elsewhere, it was the deadwood and the thieves who stayed on.
I was having a drink with a few HPE employees last night.
There was general agreement that their expected employment term at CSC would be only about a year. They were debating if they find another job immediately, or wait a bit.
No matter the reality, your company has a toxic reputation if that is the expectation. When you reinforce that reputation with layoffs and a press release like this, how can you expect the HPE deal to work out?
The deal will work out perfectly.
The contracts acquired, the staff fed into a blender and replaced by offshore.
CSC don't recognise the value of a person. You personally don't bring anything to the party, you are just a bum on a seat. A seat which can be placed anywhere in the world and a much cheaper bum stuck on it.
All of this will be done because there is no growth in the business and the wolves of wall street are only appeased by growth. The only way to "grow" is to increase margin, ie cut costs.
If you all thought Meg was bad, you aint seen NOTHING yet.
"CSC don't recognise the value of a person. You personally don't bring anything to the party, you are just a bum on a seat. A seat which can be placed anywhere in the world and a much cheaper bum stuck on it."
Just replace "CSC" with "HPE" and you also have the current HPE position in a nutshell.
Had the misfortune to work in HPE when Craig took over the UK&I team after the merger with EDS.
All of the reason he states above are just a rerun of the garbish he used to spout at HPE. The man hasn't an original thought in his head and couldn't manage his way out of a paper bag. Headcount reduction was the only tool in his toolbox.
I sincerely hope he isn't given a senior role in the new CSC/HPE company.
Dozens of compulsory redundancies are now facing hard working workers via a process of 'selection pools'; this is despite many individuals offering to take voluntary redundancy. CSC is unashamedly deciding who goes and who stays based upon the cost to release an individual based upon their T&C's.
If you are under 50, you can be gone in a week. However, for those individuals around 56 who might have generous T&C's, these are unlikely to be offered voluntary redundancy despite volunteering to help reduce the need for compulsory redundancy.
What a miserable company, targeting honest, but easy to remove workers, leading to the fact that many people are about to commence their Christmas celebrations not knowing whether they have a job to return to in the New Year.
What a shame CSC cannot live up to their 'promise' that they would mitigate against compulsory redundancies by looking for volunteers! An ethical company would exhaust their supply of volunteers before any mass firing!
Also a further shame that even the almighty [cough] UNITE union is seemingly burying its head in the sand and pretend it is business as usual! Definitely time to leave UNITE - only after I have received my new diary of course!
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