Bees bring down US stealth fighter

In June, the US Air Force had to call on an apiarist for help after more than 20,000 bees swarmed at the exhaust of an F-22 Raptor. The incident has just come to light, courtesy of a USAF media release that says the bees were found in the “exhaust nozzle of an F-22 Raptor engine following flight operations at Joint Base …

[Anonymous Coward]

From the article I gather that they didn't "bring it down", the plane had already landed. Seems a logical place to swarm too, if you're a bee. Must be nice and warm right after a flight.

Good thing they decided to recolate the bees. We sorely need them to keep up biodiversity and to prevent food prices from skyrocketing.

[Voland's right hand]

that they didn't "bring it down"

Depends on interpretation - the fighter was taken out of operations until the stray swarm was collected and taken care of. So while it was already down, it also remained down.

[Mark 85]

@Voland's Right Hand

I'm not sure why you got downvoted. In the military (US at least) a "downed" aircraft is one that is unavailable to fly. Causes are usually mechanical, electrical, hydraulic, computer, or in this case.. bees.

[Ken Moorhouse]

Re: "bring it down"

How about "Exhausted Bees swarm warm Exhaust"?

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: "bring it down"

Were there any drones in the swarm? Drones being a particular hazard to aircraft.

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: "bring it down"

"Airmen excited by buzzing at the back door"?

"flyers fortunate, saved by a sucking off"?

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: "bring it down"

Ummm. How about a free lesson from the universe? Kill bees, kill food production, kill the unwashed...

Maybe the bees are trying to tell us something? Or is that just too silly?

[Anonymous Coward]

Good thing they decided to recolate the bees

I agree, although I had to put the characters in the right place again to parse that line ("recolate" initially *sounds* plausible, but I recon you meant "relocate" :).

Bees are an incredible valuable resource so I'm glad that, for once, someone was smart with nature.

[Phil W]

To the best of my recolation...

Despite the fact it was almost certainly an error, given that the bees were together in space, separated during removal and then presumably put together (colated, in a sense) into a proper hive, they were both relocated and recolated.

[Camilla Smythe]

Trump Would Disagree..

Good thing they decided to recolate the bees. We sorely need them to keep up biodiversity and to prevent food prices from skyrocketing.

[Wensleydale Cheese]

Stealth fighter

Perhaps the bees didn't see it coming

[Steve Davies 3]

Brings a new meaning to

'Buzzing' the enemy

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: Brings a new meaning to

This is a story with a real sting in it's tail.

[Crisp]

Re: Brings a new meaning to

You two need to beehive yourselves! There's no need to keep droning on with puns...

[allthecoolshortnamesweretaken]

"Apiraist" - word of the day, definitely. Had to look that one up* and even found an alternative: "apiculturist".

* On the small screen and without my reading glasses it looked like " a pianist" initially. That didn't make any sense, so I looked into it.

[ShadowDragon8685]

Well, at least the old chap retired in style - Holmesian style.

[Anonymous Coward]

"Apiarist" is an even better word of the day.

[Robert Helpmann??]

Apiraist

My dad is a apiraist. I live further down the chain as a mead maker. The world would be a much poorer place without the honey bee.

[Rick594]

Re: Apiraist

Or the mead maker

[Banksy]

I'm covered in bees!

Do Raptors eat bees or not?

[x 7]

Re: I'm covered in bees!

Have you never heard of the Honey Buzzard - Pernis apivorus?

Though actually they prefer eatings wasp nests

[NorthernCoder]

Perhaps...

...the bees thought it was an F/A-18 Hornet?

[Baldy50]

628dirtrooster

I'm glad they relocated the swarm, you can see how it's done by this American enthusiast bee keeper and on one occasion three swarms in one go out of trees.

By using queens that he takes with him they even after getting knocked from quite a height they just get into the boxes the queen is in.

[Anonymous Coward]

It's all a cover story...

To conceal the F-22 being disabled in wargames versus the supersecret new Bee-20000!!!

[Anonymous Coward]

Re: It's all a cover story...

No, they're just covering up that they want to bring back the FBee-22.

[ShadowDragon8685]

Prolly a good thing they did, all told. Standard military reaction would have been to just gas/torch the lot and have the janitor sweep up the mess.

[Lobrau]

I suspect one doesn't use such destructive methods around a $138m aircraft when there are gentler means available.

I take your meaning though. Glad that sense prevailed and the bees were relocated to pollinate another day.

[Adam 1]

> she landed on the F-22 to rest

She was hanging around for the F-35 JSF but exhaustion set in due to another overrun.

[Anonymous Coward]

But not just ANY F35, she was waiting for the F35B.

Its Monday, this is the best I can come up with, try me again tomorrow.

[Adam 1]

Absolutely. Bee related puns are encouraged. You win one internet. Unfortunately, you immediately lost it after failing to use an apostrophe to indicate a contraction. Such behaviour must not go unpunished or society may tear itself apart at the seams.

[TheProf]

Sucker

"Westrich used vacuum hoses to trap the bees"

I use my vacuum cleaner to 'relocate' spiders.

Brrrrr spiders.

[harmjschoonhoven]

Re: Brrrrr spiders.

@TheProf: Spiders are at least as useful as predators as bees are as pollinators and (except a number of Australian species) quite harmless to human beings.

A Zebra spider (Salticus scenicus, a common jumping spider) will actually look back at you with blue eyes and red eyelashes, when you take a close look - so cute.

[nichomach]

Re: Brrrrr spiders.

Your idea of "cute" indicates an urgent need for an alienist!

[Anonymous Coward]

I wonder if...

This has anything to do with using radar to track bees?

http://beetime.eu/inside-of-tracking-honey-bee/

Who is so stealthy now?

[Peter Clarke 1]

Old Joke

Did they collect their waste to fuel the aircraft- everyone knows vehicles run better on BeePee

Coat, exit, now

[MAF]

New weaponry

Air Force to try out their new generation of Stinger missiles...

[Soruk]

Re: New weaponry

Now trying to make a social media buzz.

[John Brown (no body)]

Re: New weaponry

"Air Force to try out their new generation of Stinger missiles..."

...or buzz bombs!

[Commswonk]

Obviously...

...an attempted sting operation.

[imanidiot]

Re: Obviously...

Groan... you guys are unbeelievable

[Commswonk]

Re: Obviously...

Groan... you guys are unbeelievable

with an appollen sense of humour.

It's who we are, and what we do.

[Solmyr ibn Wali Barad]

Re: Obviously...

Don't wax. There's at least beellion ways to have a sting at it, we're not even halfway through.

[Simon Harris]

"eight pounds, or in modern numbers, 3.6 kilos."

This is The Register you're writing for - what's that in proper units?

[Dave Harris]

Re: "eight pounds, or in modern numbers, 3.6 kilos."

0.86Jb

[Nick Ryan]

Re: "eight pounds, or in modern numbers, 3.6 kilos."

Good man. Now all I have to do is to get the thought out of my mind: are those bee stings or "proper" jubs.

I'm leaving...

[waldo kitty]

Re: "eight pounds, or in modern numbers, 3.6 kilos."

0.571429 stone

[Adam 1]

Re: "eight pounds, or in modern numbers, 3.6 kilos."

> what's that in proper units

About 20 KiloBees

[earl grey]

not nearly as much sting

As those delivered by the moderatrix in times past.

[Mark 85]

Re: not nearly as much sting

Ah.. those were happy times. Thanks for the memory.

[VeganVegan]

Re: not nearly as much sting

We do miss the sting of the dearly departed Sarah Bee.

[Anonymous Coward]

Well done USAF..

..for resolving it in such a sensitive way.

[Hollerithevo]

A clear message from Mother Nature

Make honey not war.

[Howard Hanek]

Oh Dear

They couldn't be British bees because THEY got into trouble following the Queen.

[Commswonk]

Just realised...

a USAF media release that says the bees were found in the “exhaust nozzle of an F-22 Raptor engine following flight operations at Joint Base …

They thought it was a Nectar Point.

OK, OK I'm going...

[Mark 85]

Re: Just realised...

But the photo shows the tail, not the exhaust.... Mass confusion reigns....

[Sane]

It used to be the F15 that was nicknamed 'the hangar queen'.

[Scott 53]

The USAF Pokémon Corps were in town. You can all relax, it was just a Beedrill.

[Bill Roberts]

Word meanings count

Even when it's slang - any aviator knows bring it down means "crash" or "forced landing". This aircraft was "taken out of service". The picture, by the way, clearly shows the swarm on a vertical stabilizer, not an exhaust duct.

[Sven Coenye]

Re: Word meanings count

No, although not quite in the exhaust duct. It is one of upper vectoring plates.

[Herby]

Interesting creatures...

Bees are interesting to say the lease. Given a chance they will take up residence in lots of places (even those you don't want!). Last year I had to clear out a bee infestation of quite some magnitude in my house. The bee guy (they belong to a group!) vacuumed up the little critters and scraped the hive down. It was HUGE and all inside the space between the floors in the house. He had nice containers to get the bees into that fit into his shop vacuum. I don't know the weight of the bees, but the hive must have weighed over 20 lbs (sorry, I use American units). It took a couple of days to complete the job, and even after that, there were bunches of bees left over pounding against the glass door to the outside. Even after the cleanup (and relocation) about a year later, some decided to come back and visit again (homesick?) and we needed to do some more relocation.

All in all these guys ARE industrious!!

[Disk0]

They were all humming...

those B-52's tunes....

WHO'S A ROCK LOBSTER NOW

[The Nazz]

Where's the usual corollory to a story of this nature?

ie No brown wedding parties or MSF hospitals where harmed during this entire exercise.

[goldcd]

Sod Manuka Honey - way too common

I now want honey solely made from high-grade classified composites.

[nicercat]

sweet bubba G's sake

honestly, kill the fn bees.

[x 7]

The stealth camouflage on that aircraft must be crap if bees can see through it

[JeffyPoooh]

How did the bees even find it?

They said it was 'stealth'...

[Ken Moorhouse]

Re: How did the bees even find it?

That is none of your bees knees.

[JJKing]

Your F22 are beelong to us.

[AbeSapian]

Snake Bit

Is there anything that doesn't go wrong with this gold plated turd?