back to article Feds in America very excited about new global privacy alert system

US watchdog the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) has signed an agreement with seven countries to share cross-border information relating to privacy. The new "alert" system will let regulators from America, UK, Australia, Canada, Ireland, the Netherlands, New Zealand, and Norway share confidential information about ongoing …

  1. Warm Braw

    The new "alert" system will let regulators...

    ... detect the minutest sign of privacy and stamp it out before it becomes contagious?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Big Brother

      Re: The new "alert" system will let regulators...

      I sometimes wonder if the word 'privacy' even exists in the American dictionary...

      It must have a completely different meaning over there...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: The new "alert" system will let regulators...

        I was discussing this on an yank-centric forum, and had privacy thoroughly explained to me.

        First you should understand that privacy is dead, and knowing everything about me will allow corporations to improve services. The more they know, the better my life will be.

        Next, privacy is actually just a cover for European protectionism, and because only America can actually build a search engine, Google will take their ball home and we'll be begging for them to come back and snarfle up our data.

        Also privacy is just the thin end of the wedge. Privacy, or in fact any regulation, leads to environmentalism, socialism, and finally communism in that order of increasing evilness.

        So now you know the truth about privacy.

        1. Mark 85

          Re: The new "alert" system will let regulators...

          I'm a Yank...

          Privacy might be dead but not because "most" people want it that way. Politicians have told people repeatedly that it's about "terrorists". Such corporates as Google and MS and others have told people repeatedly that it's about "improving the user experience.

          As for everything else.. those folks get sound like they've been paying too much attention to Faux News and not reading other sources (both conservative and liberal since there's no un-biased news).

          The old saying about telling a lie often enough and vehemently enough and soon people believe it as the truth, applies here.

          Yes, we citizens are mushrooms. Our government keeps us in the dark and feeds us bullshit.

      2. g e

        @malle

        It is but they pronounce it 'pry-vacy' and I think they think it means being able to pry into privacy rather than actual privacy itself.

      3. fishman

        Re: The new "alert" system will let regulators...

        " sometimes wonder if the word 'privacy' even exists in the American dictionary..."

        Yet the UK has far more security cameras than the US.

  2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

    Privacy & the US

    They've learned how to spell it.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It doesn't matter

    It will never measure up. Give it 100 years and maybe if things have changed, it will work. The fact is, if you make data available to the US corporations it will likely be intercepted, analyzed and disseminated to your favorite TLAs. I'm an American, but I feel like I live in Cold War Russia. Thanks to my congress critter asswipes who vote to sell their constituents' privacy to the lowest bidder. May they rot in hell.

  4. Cincinnataroo

    Trust yourself

    We can't trust government, we can't trust many corporations...

    and then we have the Talk Talk managing bozo who seems to be from an alternate, lesser, dimension

    If you want privacy, take an interest, take time and roll your own.

  5. Mephistro
    Coffee/keyboard

    This will surely defuse the ECJ's ruling on the Safe Harbour Agreement, won't it?

    He hehee hahaa he heheee... sigh...

    Panic can be so funny!

  6. Your alien overlord - fear me

    Er, this is just 5Eyes and their drinking buddies who as we know only to well, already have a sharing data policy in place.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    Of course the FCC can negotiate whatever they want with the EC.

    Its not like the NSA or the rest of the federal alphabet agencies are going to allow themselves to be bound by such an agreement, or even let the FCC know that they are doing anything to violate it.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Of course the FCC can negotiate whatever they want with the EC.

      The US TLA's will operate on the following premise

      1) You give us everything. We already have it so this just makes it semi-legal instead of illegal

      2) We give you nithing because everything we do in covered by 'National Security'. Yes this applies to the brands of Coffee we have in our offices. Can't have those Commies outside the USA knowing things like that.

      Ok friends in foreign parts, off you go and get on with working in this nice new level playing field. Remember that we will be monitoring your compliance on a daily basis.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "People need to know privacy authorities around the globe are watching over their information"

    I'm pretty sure they aren't. But the spooks sure are trying...

  9. The_Idiot

    "Share information...

    ... relating to privacy."

    No. I'm sorry. I have to try that again.

    "Share information relating to privacy."

    OK. I know. They don't mean that like it sounds.

    Er - they don't, right?

    Oh.

    Oh dear.

  10. Winkypop Silver badge
    Unhappy

    Beam me back to the 60's, please

    Where we were all pretty much anonymous; we didn't lock our doors, few had a phone, travel left little data, no one had a credit card and (ironically) you knew everyone in your town.

    (of course that's the 60's of a privileged white kid, other people's mileage varied)

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So

    My cunning plan to NEVER use social media is coming to fruition!

    Off to watch Children of Men and then maybe 1984....I wonder how the war with Eastasia is going?

    1. smudge
      Big Brother

      Re: So

      I wonder how the war with Eastasia is going?

      Eastasia is our friend and ally, and always has been. Only last week, Airstrip One was honoured by a visit from their glorious leader.

      Eurasia is our enemy, and always has been. Very shortly, Big Brother will give us all the opportunity to leave it forever.

      Benefits are restraints.

      Cuts are liberation.

      Plutocracy is equality.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Privacy alert? Does that means an alarm goes off if someone actually manages to get some?

  13. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    "Today, data is increasingly crossing borders"

    Indeed, and that is a situation that we are trying to reverse.

    Nothing to get excited about.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Lotsa luck

    The FTC doesn't even remotely perform it's responsibilities under law so don't expect them to do anything of value in the next ten or fifteen centuries.

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