back to article A magic bracelet that unlocks PCs, dancing robot spiders, and more in Intel's circus

It's party time at Intel. The mixtape is in the deck. The beers are chilling in the tub. The chip giant has 99 per cent of the data-center market. Its profits in a single quarter can slip a few per cent, and still stand at $2.7bn. AMD is still AMD. What has Intel got to worry about? OK, mobiles, PCs, laptops, and tablets are …

  1. DropBear

    I simply can't recall the last time Intel came out with something that got me excited. I just can't. I'm having a wrestling match with a tiny dirt-cheap OpenWRT dev board right now, and I'm annoyed that I have to go to bed; the Edison thing - dunno, just neither cheap enough nor unique enough to care... Oh, and ID bracelets? Gimme one that unlocks the PC only if my wrist is within 30cm of the mouse or so and I might get interested - being in the general vicinity of my PC does not mean I see who's doing what on it...

  2. Ragequit

    I think...

    Intel misunderstood IoT. Their chips didn't actually need to be in "things". As in mechanical critters ready to steal/disarm our ID bracelets that grant access to WMDs and bring about the worlds destruction.

    Joking aside, besides xpoint which is as much of a paper launch as everything else I'm wondering if Intel is suffering from tick-tock withdrawal due to their 10nm delays.

    Also, please put a heat sensor and heart monitor on the ID bracelets. I'm rather attached to my extremities.

    1. Captain DaFt

      Re: I think...

      And how long before someone makes an app/gizmo that monitors the handshake between PC and bracelet, then fakes the bracelet when you're away?

      1. P. Lee

        Re: I think...

        >And how long before someone makes an app/gizmo that monitors the handshake between PC and bracelet, then fakes the bracelet when you're away?

        Basically you need to do full PKI with time data included. If you can crack that and put it in a little dot which you attach to your existing watch strap, it might be usable. It has to be just "unlock" though, not login, otherwise you'll login to every PC you pass. Worse, someone will put a sensor on a wireless device and nick your login while you shake hands. Even then, the "wireless extension" problem means someone could get you to log in while you're away.

        I'm still wondering about W10's facial recognition and Google Glass. Can you feed the video data back to a screen in front of a PC and get it to login?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I think...

      So Intel thinks that putting a commercially available car unlocker into a bracelet is cool?

      There are cars that do this and they've been hacked.

      So Intel... what have you done that is smart enough to stop your apparently so cool bit of tat from being hacked?

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    All I want is a secure computing platform

    So we have all this flim flam , how about just giving a computing platform that can be made bullet proof and not require costly (in both financial and resource) and stupid anti virus software ...

    Surely this can not be beyond the whit of man ?

    1. Pascal Monett Silver badge

      Beyond the whit, no.

      Beyond the RD wallet, probably.

    2. Kubla Cant

      Re: All I want is a secure computing platform

      Surely this can not be beyond the whit of man ?

      whit : a very small part or amount

      wit : natural ability to perceive and understand; intelligence

      1. Sir Runcible Spoon

        Re: All I want is a secure computing platform

        As in "He hasn't a whit of wit!"

  4. 27escape


    Pairs my computer and phone, means I do not need to wear a stupid bracelet and run windows

  5. PNGuinn

    Do you want chipzilla with that?

    "Krzanich made a robot fetch him a bottle of diet cola which is bad for you but tastes so good"

    Diet cola??? Nasty bitter artificial sweetener that turns my gut??


    Methinks my next pc will be AMD powered just out of spite.

    1. David Lawrence

      Re: Do you want chipzilla with that?

      Relax! I saw in the article that Tango was also available..... :-)

      1. Gordon 10

        Re: Do you want chipzilla with that?

        Next years project is a tie up between Intel, Google and Disney to produce a big fat orange robot that will deliver your fizzy drink before slapping your ears and trundling off to the White Cliffts of Dover to Xenophobically abuse the French.

    2. TheProfessorY

      Re: Do you want chipzilla with that?

      Don't you mean just out of Sprite?

  6. IPCurious

    A bracelet that authorises you and forgets the code when it's unlatched? Well, it took them long enough, US patent 7571468 was applied for in 2004 and granted in 2009.

  7. Nolveys

    Are Bracelets Better Than Fingerprint Scanners?

    I guess that I wouldn't *have* to sever the hand to get the bracelet...but I already bought a nice stun gun and a meat cleaver.

    1. Nolveys

      Re: Are Bracelets Better Than Fingerprint Scanners?

      IPCurious: A bracelet that authorises you and forgets the code when it's unlatched

      I guess that answers that question.

  8. Anonymous Coward

    Stunned again....

    "....You authenticate and pair it over the air with your PC by typing in your password on the system and logging in. When you move away, the PC locks the screen. When you return, it detects the bracelet, and unlocks the screen. "

    So like the wireless credit card and usb thumb drive style devices that have been around for at least a decade now.

  9. John 110

    Those aren't mechanoids

    Everybody knows that mechanoids are sort of roundish and spout fire, at least they were before the Daleks exterminated them. Those are obviously replicators and they should be exterminated (where are the Daleks when you actually need them...) before they evolve into humanform and start replacing people... Wait they are suspiciously subservient to that fleshy human ordering them about, I think we might be too lat

  10. Rich 11 Silver badge

    I, for one,...

    ...welcome our new dancing spider robot overlords.

    Since obviously they'll soon be controlled by a ruthless assassin with a long tongue and a pistol which fires homing rounds.

    1. Sir Runcible Spoon

      Re: I, for one,...

      please remind of the name of that film - my memory has gone to sleep

      1. HereIAmJH

        Re: I, for one,...

        Runaway, from 1984. With Tom Selleck and Gene Simmons.

        1. Sir Runcible Spoon

          Re: I, for one,...

          I thank thee :)

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Those bracelets...

    I worked for a company that developed those for Intel fabs in 2004. It was linked to ESSO.

  13. Jay 2

    Robot spiders?

    I would say burn them with fire, but they'll probably survive that. So nuke them for orbit, just to be sure...

  14. LordB

    Old, Old News!

    Just sorting through my bedside table to find....not one, but two Java Rings! ( Kleptomaniac Moi? )

    Wearable IT is so last century!

    My 'toy box' includes Sunspot Sensor R&D kit circa 2006 way before IOT

    I now ignore articles from Google Futurologists and Intel whiz kids as they are re-hashes of John Gage et al at Sun

    " One day even a light bulb will have an IP address"

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward



POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon

Other stories you might like