back to article AIDS? Ebola? Nah – ELECTRO SMOG is our 'biggest problem', says Noel Edmonds

Once omnipresent telly host Noel Edmonds has claimed that "the biggest problem we have is not Ebola, it's not AIDS, it's electro smog." Electro smog, according to Edmonds, is a product of "the Wi-Fi and all of the systems that we are introducing into our lives" which "are destroying our own natural electro-magnetic fields." …

  1. tacitust

    Well, at least he's not telling people they shouldn't vaccinate their kids. Still crazy, but not scary crazy.

    1. Mark 85

      Indeed, he does sound like he's a few sandwiches short of a picnic. OTOH, I don't know how "popular" he is over there, but this might be an opportunity to go long on shares of the company that makes the device. Then sell for a profit before some guardian agency degrees them as being worthless and a scam.

      Crap.. I'm sounding like a greedy capitalist... Oh wait.. I am a greedy capitalist looking to pad by retirement account.

      1. swampdog


        Not any more. Think "Minions". You have the yellow sanitised version. We got the purple 6ft spotty penis version.

        In fact. Now I've typed that (as a joke) I'm beginning to think there might be verity there.

        1. Zippy's Sausage Factory

          Re: Minions

          I miss Mr Blobby. Let's face it, he was the only reason anyone watched House Party anyway.

          1. Nick Ryan Silver badge

            Re: Minions

            Well it certainly wasn't for him - all ego and no (nice) personality (IMHO).

            "Everything is about energy," said the former associate of Mr Blobby.

            On the other hand, this is one amazing quote and attribution assasination in one. Can a QOTW come from a staff writer?

          2. Frank Bough

            Re: Minions

            Quality, value and originality.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Noel Edmonds, meet David Icke. Didn't you both used to work for the BBC ? I'm sure you will both get on very well.

      I certainly know Noel used to pump out Megawatts of Electro RF shit every year on Radio 1.

      1. Jim 59

        Edmonds is nowhere near as far, far, far out as Icke. And if one reads the story with a bit of thought, most of what he says here is just a broad statement of physics, apart from the EMPpad bit. For example, the bit Team Register have emboldened is just a statement of the law of conservation of energy.

        Yes, physicists don't use the term "electr smog", but we certainly are living in a bunch of radio noise. You could call it a sea, or a field, or a smog...

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward


          Most of what he says here is not "a broad statement of physics", it is a load of new age nonsense that appropriates the language of physics. In other words, the same pseudo-scientific claptrap that Deepak Chopra peddles.

          When a physicist says "conservation of energy" they mean something very specific and measurable. When Edmonds says "energy" he means something completely vague to do with your "life force" (whatever that means) leaving your body and joining some universal consciousness. Unless you have some concrete definition of what "life energy" is, how you measure, and how it gets transmitted out of the body into wherever-it-is that it goes, it's just rubbish.

          1. DropBear

            Re: Bollocks

            I'm kinda wondering what would he do if someone were to tell him there's an awful lot of MUCH higher frequency "electo-magnetic smog" sloshing around, also known as "thermal radiation" (and even worse - "light"!) which he could completely escape only by leaving the solar system entirely (not a bad idea, actually)...

          2. Stevie

            Re: Bollocks

            "Most of what he says here is not "a broad statement of physics","

            Agreed. It can't be physics. It doesn't have any quantums in it.

          3. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            moRe: Bollocks

            What part of science isn't believing some story your mind tells you is actually real?

            This leaving the body stuff is so backwards, our mind just stops trying to convince you that your body is the whole of you. So no "joining some universal consciousness" required, you just intentially forgot who you really are. Sometimes we remember and then convince ourselves to forget again and pretend that things are real.

            The only knowable fact is that our mind presents us with a very believable reality.

          4. Jim 59

            Re: Bollocks

            Most of what he says here is not "a broad statement of physics", it is a load of new age nonsense that appropriates the language of physics.

            I disagree. He doesn't mention "new age" or "life force", these are terms introduced by you. Yes, there is some made-up daftness (empPAD, "wrong sorts of electro-magnetism", Ebola). However, much of his statement regarding energy would find qualitative agreement among physics teachers.

            We shouldn't get too snooty about people without physics O/A levels. They can understand some things without necessarily using the correct academic language. To people like Stephen Hawking, we probably all sound like Edmunds.

            Swap Shop fans back me up here!

      2. Naughtyhorse

        The Beeb.

        Given the revelations about many of their erstwhile colleagues, I'd say batshit crazy is prolly a good deal

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "Edmonds says he remains healthy through a £2,000 device called an EMPpad"

      I imagine that he is already high up on a suckers list for the Scientologists, etc....

  2. mad_dr

    Is this a preview of a new series of Brass Eye?

    I seem to recall the beardy one talking crap on that show too...

    1. Elmer Phud

      Re: Is this a preview of a new series of Brass Eye?

      Electrosmug git?

    2. Oliver Mayes

      Re: Is this a preview of a new series of Brass Eye?

      I thought he was one of the only ones to question the bullshit they tried to have him recite?

    3. AbelSoul

      Re: Is this a preview of a new series of Brass Eye?

      Ah, the "Cake" episode. An absolute classic.

      Mr Edmonds made a royal fool of himself.

      "The most dangerous thing about Cake is that it's a made up drug."

      And not to forget the other episode in that series where assorted celebrity pals were literally talking Nonce Sense.

      1. ravenviz Silver badge

        Re: Is this a preview of a new series of Brass Eye?

        Er, I think it was the Brass Eye production team that made a fool of him, he was acting in all good faith putting his popularity where his mouth is and backing a (what he thought was a) worthy cause.

        Chris Morris' talent though is without question.

      2. John Savard

        Re: Is this a preview of a new series of Brass Eye?

        Oh, dear. But then they've said that...

        The Cake is a lie!

  3. Uberseehandel

    I'm impressed

    Not many people in television are as bright as that!

    1. Rich 11 Silver badge

      Re: I'm impressed

      There's certainly one thing he's achieved: he makes Gwyneth Paltrow sound sane.

  4. cynic 2

    I'm also impressed. An EMPpad? An iPad that can take out national power infrastructure? Awesome.

    1. Richard Taylor 2

      Well it solves the battery life when you are out and about and have forgotten your charger.

    2. Ragarath

      I was more impressed with this claim:

      EMPpad PEMF technology produces an electromagnetic pulse at an intensity and frequency which mimics the earth’s magnetic field.

      So it mimics the field that is already present around you? That's an easy claim to satisfy.

  5. frank ly

    Go now, please.

    "My energy will return to where it came from – part of a massive, incomprehensible universal web of energy."

    He used to be massive and universal (in the UK anyway). Now, he's just incomprehensible.

    1. Elmer Phud

      Re: Go now, please.

      A massive and universal -- twat.

  6. Mike Bell

    David Icke still hard to beat

    For some proper way-out stuff.

  7. Charles Manning

    He's possibly right about Ebola

    Ebola has been massively over-hyped.

    Sure, it has killed some people but really nothing compared to other health risks. If anything, all the hoo-ha about Ebola has muddied the water when it come other diseases.

    During the last 18 months in the three W. African countries of Sierra Leone, Guinea and Liberia there have been 11000-odd deaths from Ebola out of a population for 22million or so. About 1 per 2000 people.

    During that same time in those three countries:

    * Flu killed about 50,000-60,000

    * Malaria killed about 30,000.

    * Tuberculosis killed about 50,000

    * AIDS 20,000.

    * Motor vehicle accidents: 6,000 or so.

    So all the media hype about Ebola causing massive problems due to economic disruption due to people dying was just nonsense.

    1. Robert Grant

      Re: He's possibly right about Ebola

      Classic tactic - put a fact next to a claim and if people aren't really listening (or aren't very analytical) then the veracity of the former appears to transfer to the latter.

    2. Anonymous Coward 101

      Re: He's possibly right about Ebola

      Do me a fucking favour.

      Reread this quote: "The biggest problem we have is not Ebola, it’s not Aids, it’s electro smog." How many people has 'electro smog' killed in those three African countries?

      1. Col_Panek

        Re: He's possibly right about Ebola

        If you include the 400 nm radiation from the sun causing skin cancer, probably a lot. But mostly Irish on holiday.

    3. Rich 11 Silver badge

      Re: He's possibly right about Ebola

      So all the media hype about Ebola causing massive problems due to economic disruption due to people dying was just nonsense.

      The economic disruption wasn't caused by people dying, it was caused by people being afraid to go out and carry on with business as usual for fear of getting infected.

    4. MathsFail

      Re: He's possibly right about Ebola: No

      Charles, what your Noel's analysis fails to consider is how Ebola differs from those other causes of death:

      * the Ebola deaths occurred over a month, the others you quote over 18 months. I leave the linear growth calculations as an exercise (even though disease transmission/death is often exponential);

      * the nature of Ebola means that people must avoid contact with others to avoid infection. This isn't the case with the other things you mention and effectively shuts down all activity in affected areas. Think about that happening in a city, eg business district;

      * Ebola's infectiousness means that the risk of it spreading outside those countries, eg via human travel on planes or boats, is huge. Imagine what that does to importing/exporting or business travel between neighboring countries. Look at our own response in airport/port controls;

      * disease containment and body disposal require new techniques, equipment and facilities. All this costs time and money meaning the response is slow, meaning the disease spreads faster, exacerbating all the above points;

      * finally, can you honestly tell me that your personal response (and fear of) Ebola is the same as for flu or a car accident?

    5. Graham Marsden

      Re: He's possibly right about Ebola

      > Ebola has been massively over-hyped.

      Yeah, but nobody ever made a scary film about Flu, Malaria, TB or Motor Vehicle Accidents...

      1. Elmer Phud

        Re: He's possibly right about Ebola

        EBola isn't a proper disease - it only seems to affect Africans.

        Well, that's what I read in the first offering of testicles.

      2. Richard Taylor 2

        Re: He's possibly right about Ebola

        Yeah, but nobody ever made a scary film about Flu, Malaria, TB or Motor Vehicle Accidents...

        Well I raise you, in order

        * Flu Bird Horror

        * Martha and Mary (a Richard Curtis film - so that get's the horror angle)

        * A New York Winter's Tale (it really is bad)

        * Crash

        1. Stevie

          Well I raise you, in order

          No, the ellipsis at the end of the original post was the clue that irony was in play.

          So not so much a raise as STBO.

      3. GitMeMyShootinIrons

        Re: He's possibly right about Ebola

        "Yeah, but nobody ever made a scary film about Flu, Malaria, TB or Motor Vehicle Accidents..."

        I remember a scary film about motor vehicle accidents. In fact several:

        - Keanu had pretty scary acting in Speed.

        - Those Fast and Furious films had scary accidents.

        - But check out this for full horror...

    6. Fibbles

      Re: He's possibly right about Ebola

      Those numbers are completely disingenuous. Considerably more effort was expended to contain the Ebola outbreak than to contain any outbreaks of Flu for example. Were Ebola left to run unchecked the numbers would be very different.

      Ebola has a mortality rate of 50-70%. Flu has a mortality rate of 0.1%.

  8. oldtaku Silver badge

    Just think, if Bonny Prince Woo Woo Charles ever takes the throne, this is your new Secretary of State for Health. Time to have a pint to the health of the old girl.

    1. Rich 11 Silver badge

      Even Brian's not that daft. Probably. Anyway, the monarch doesn't appoint secretaries of state.

      1. Elmer Phud

        "Even Brian's not that daft. Probably."

        Too late, we have a health minister who 'knows' homeopaathy 'works' and a recent announcement that MORE of OUR money will be put towards NHS and empty water.

        We is well buggered!

        1. swampdog


          Is this a thing? Seriously?

          Last time I visited the dentist the coloured water wasn't. Just H2O.

          I've been off rest off week with a stomach bug. I'm not too squeamish - if I had a sterile syringe I'd had popped myself "James Herriot cow style" by now.

    2. Zuagroasta

      Long to reign over us... pretty please?

      Ladies and germs, the Queen! *gulpgulpgulp*

  9. Barry Tabrah

    Careful now

    Just taking about this story can result in your logo being slapped on their website.

  10. P. Lee

    >"Everything is about energy," said the former associate of Mr Blobby.


    (Isn't that how the cool kids call tech support these days?)

  11. BenBell

    Am I the only one tempted to send him one of these pieces of crap?

    What an idiot.

    1. Graham Marsden


      Nice comments section on that item...

    2. Jim 59

      <What an idiot.</i>

      Screw you pal. You don't even know how many Magpie annuals are worth a 1000 piece jigsaw of John Noakes with Shep.

  12. Law

    Reported by Digital Spy?!?!

    So it's come to this?? El Reg is re-reporting a Digital Spy article... which itself is based on some lazy re-reporting of a mirror interview... I assume you saved the extra Clarkson / Evans paragraphs for another couple of pieces? (yes, I lowered myself to googling "noel edmonds digital spy")

  13. John Tserkezis

    Doesn't have all the dots on his dice.

    Besides, he should have come to me for a tinfoil hat. I have a bit of spare al-foil that would have cost him nothing. But you know how it goes, an idiot and his money are soon parted....

    Yep, lots more where they came from.

    1. Elmer Phud

      Re: Doesn't have all the dots on his dice.

      " an idiot and his money are soon parted...."

      Ah yes, that little exercise just off thr A30 . . .

  14. Phuq Witt


    According to the Daily Fail's rehashing of this story [Look. I was bored and there was nothing else to read!] Edmonds also claims that his dead parents sit permanently, in the form of 'golden orbs', one on each of his shoulders.

    That would really cramp your style when it came to certain 'Gentlemen's Relaxation' exercises. So no wonder the fecker's had to resort to his EmPad. It's obviously the equivalent of a cold shower, for the digital age.

  15. Ed Jackson

    F**king Magnets...

    How do they work?

    1. Mage Silver badge

      Re: Magnets...

      I don't think anyone really knows how a Magnet works.

      But Electrosmog is pure nocebo.

      All in the mind.

      I think F**king Magnets would be painful.

      1. Elmer Phud

        Re: Magnets...

        "I think F**king Magnets would be painful."

        I have magnets from old speakers --they have a hole in the middle.

        I reckon could market them as sperm enhancers -- fucking magnets could make a lot of money in the Woo marketplace.

        1. Naughtyhorse

          Re: You clearly haven't thought this through...

          In a world full (ish) of genital piercing fucking magnets is A BAD THING

      2. Jim 59

        Re: Magnets...

        But Electrosmog is pure nocebo.

        Isn't he just talking about man-made electromagnetic radiation ? Which is indeed everywhere, all the time ? Not to mention all the natural stuff.

        Sunlight: call it electrosmog if you like.

    2. Hans Neeson-Bumpsadese Silver badge

      Re: F**king Magnets...

      "F**king Magnets...How do they work?" see, a mummy magnet and a daddy magnet love each other very much, and give each other a special cuddle...

  16. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

    It's pollution of brains

    Jesus Christ these people are utter scum, fecking telemarketers of crap memes.

    Fuck your "energy", when you die it's not departure, your energy is transformed into low-grade heat. This has been known for a long time.

    Give him a free ride to Syria.

  17. Crisp

    There isn't such a thing as death?

    Try telling that to the family of Michael Lush.

    1. Richard Wharram

      Re: There isn't such a thing as death?

      Best. Comment. Ever.

    2. Naughtyhorse

      Re: There isn't such a thing as death?


  18. DJO Silver badge


    I remember a very long time ago I was at a party where a young Noel Edmonds was being very self-important in the kitchen, until the police turned up (actually just to get the music turned down a bit).

    Me Blobby was out into the garden and over the fence before you could say "Daily Mail Expose" - As were a lot of naughty persons in the front room who left their bits & bobs behind, so I helpfully tidied up and was stoned for a week.

  19. Dr_N

    WOO WOO !!!

    Internet inspired Woo. Can't beat it.

  20. MJI Silver badge

    At least he is happy

    Not being a miserable sod, not scared of popping his clogs.

    Might be a load of old bollocks but at least Mr Blobbys friend will be happy.

    One final thing for Mr Blobby well done for knocking Take That off no. 1 with the Blobby song!

    Almost as good as Bob the Builder denying some other boy band a no. 1

  21. Anonymous Coward

    The man continues to be a total cockwomble.

    1. g e


      I laugh every time I see that word now.

      Plus it must confuse the shit out of yanks who probably think it's pronounced kok-woom-ul

      Cos they don't have Wombles.

      1. ravenviz Silver badge

        Re: Cockwomble

        Presidents aside of course!

  22. Joey M0usepad Silver badge

    is he selling these things? where can i get one?

  23. Captain DaFt

    "I use [my EMPpad] eight minutes a day – it has changed my life," offered Edmonds, who then explained how it is able to do so."

    I bought a novelty clock that runs backwards and put it in my bedroom.

    Probably just as effective as his EMPad.

    1. Richard Taylor 2

      Surely that violates 'time arrow'?

      1. Richard Taylor 2

        I suppose not - time still flows - even when the clock is running backwards

    2. Stevie

      novelty clock

      Yes, but I believe that the ePad comes with two sets of paint sponges and a bottle of Ox-E-Wipes if you order NOW using the toll-free number. Just pay three hundred quid P&P.

  24. Jean Le PHARMACIEN

    From the 1980s electrosmogger himself

    I remember Noel from his Radio 1 DJ days.

    I can't decide if his intellect/insight has declined since then but I AM sure that today is April 1st and I claim the prize for the spotting the April Fool (and his story)

  25. Dave 12

    Cut price bungay jumps

    They are even more dangerous, and you don't get to live to 66 either

    1. no-one in particular

      Re: Cut price bungay jumps

      > you don't get to live to 66 either

      I never knew living in Suffolk was that dangerous!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Cut price bungay jumps

      Technically, bread products don't have a sexual orientation- "gay" or otherwise- let alone have any means (mental or physical) to participate in "jumps" or other sports.

    3. Phuq Witt
      Thumb Up

      Re: Cut price bungay jumps

      Thumbs up for the obscure Pallisers reference.

  26. Allan George Dyer

    Let's get this straight...

    "part of a massive, incomprehensible universal web of energy" -

    Yep, that's right. Biologists call it the Food Web. Next time you get bitten by a mosquito - celebrate, it's immortality on an instalment plan! Bird just shat on you? That might be Grandma trying to get back in contact, via the bird that ate the worm that... you get the idea.

    Any sane person makes a distinction between energy and consciousness. Shesh!

    1. Naughtyhorse

      Re: energy and consciousness

      I appreciate that I am on thin ice here.

      And I have absolutely no wish to be associated in any way with the cockwomble(heheheheh) in question.

      but on the question of consciousness and energy... i think there is a clear link.

      What is 'me' is an unintended consequence of all that electrical activity going on behind my eyes.

      electrical _energy_ that is. ergo I am energy, when the energy goes away... I stop.


      that said, crystal vibrations is bollocks (apart from,,,, err real ones)

      dowsing is just a twat in a field with a stick.

      Prince Philip is most certainly _not_ a lizard.. I'm pretty sure anyway.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: energy and consciousness

        Prince Philip is most certainly _not_ a lizard.. I'm pretty sure anyway

        At last a voice of reason, least Phil say's what's on his mind, rather like my Aspergers suffering son (who by the way has never felt the need to hack and use it as an excuse to avoid prosecution)

        1. PDC

          Re: energy and consciousness

          I'm an Aspie, and I certainly don't "suffer" from it.

      2. David Nash

        Re: energy and consciousness

        But when these woo-merchants say "energy" they don't mean any normal, accepted definition of energy such as you might get from a scientist or even a physics teacher. they mean some vague undefinable "life force".

        Consciousness is just the emergent behaviour of a few billion brain cells and the rest of your body working together, yes they need energy input from food, and they convert that to electrical energy to do work, but there's nothing mysterious about that.

        Now explaining consciousness, yes, that is called "the hard problem" and is quite mysterious indeed. But one can't just posit some unexplainable web of "energy".

        By the way reports I've heard indicated that self-proclaimed sufferers of sensitivity to EM radiation from wifi, etc, couldn't tell the difference from placebo, so it's all in the mind or simply an unrelated conjunction of assorted non-specific symptoms (headaches, tireness, nausea etc). Unfortunately I don't have an immediate source for that. It's just a normal reaction of some to newish technology. Same happened when the railways were invented, no doubt something similar happened with motor vehicles, and I've even heard that people claimed some kind of syndrome caused by ball-point pens!

  27. Doctor_Wibble

    Dangers Of Electro-Smog

    The presence of electro-smog means all those newfangled doodads without wires can work and you end up with people wandering about aimlessly, casually throwing themselves into the paths of herds of rampaging shopping trolleys with absolutely no thought for those of us trying to whizz past on our hipster scooter thingies and although they aren't going to try and eat us, Mr Romero's fine and much-emulated documentaries do spring to mind.

    edit: or possibly The Fog but there's a book and a film with different stories and that just gets confusing especially the bit where we can't see the electro-smog but on the other hand it does have an insidious control over the minds of those within, who will either try and assimilate/eat or destroy you so maybe they aren't that different...

  28. Hans Neeson-Bumpsadese Silver badge

    Going somewhere

    "The energy leaves your container but it has to go somewhere"

    I assume that, like so much other TV content, that other place is UK Gold / Dave

  29. Elmer Phud


    For that Extended Menstrual Phlow.

    (does it have round edges?)

    1. Naughtyhorse

      Re: does it have round edges?

      Not unless it's made by apple it don't

  30. Mugs

    Robert A. Heinlein was right

    Waldo (1942) was based on this idea but RAH knew the difference between fact and fiction

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's life, Jim, but not as we know it..

    .. and a new one is born every minute.

    Edmonds says he remains healthy through a £2,000 device called an EMPpad, which purports to be based on NASA research.

    It removes pain and reduces stress and people tell me I don't look 66.

    "I use [my EMPpad] eight minutes a day – it has changed my life," offered Edmonds, who then explained how it is able to do so.

    "It recalibrates all the blood cells and readjusts the electro-magnetism in your body. Think of a yoga mat, connected to a computer – it provides you with pulsed electro-magnetism."

    Colour me suspicious after hearing such a barrel load of, well, claptrap, really, but I'd like to know how much of the company that makes it is owned by Mr Edmonds himself. The statement as above contains quite a lot of repulsive energy for people like me, you know.

  32. Paul Bullough

    Swap Shop

    Hi Noel,

    I'd like to swap a Speak & Spell and a Posh Paws (soiled) for an EMPpad.


  33. RonWheeler

    NE's phraseology is bad

    but there is some, slightly vague, slightly theoretical work being done on non-native EMF showing it can have an effect on the human body. See books like 'The Body Electric'. Some of the quantum biology stuff is a bit 'out there'.... I used to be a EMF cynic until I hooked myself up to a regular multimeter and stood beside from the microwave oven.

  34. DarkwavePunk

    Bleeding hell, he sounds like a slightly more lucid version of Depak Chopra. If you don't know who that is, consider yourself lucky!

  35. This post has been deleted by its author

  36. Little Mouse

    Hang on - he might have a point...

    Fundamentally, we ARE all made of energy.

    And I've seen enough superhero films to know that anyone who "recalibrates all the blood cells and readjusts the electro-magnetism in your body" will inevitably become some kind of supervillain.

    In this case, a supervillain who wears his Mum's hair and his Hairdresser's shirts.

    1. MrPloppy

      Re: Hang on - he might have a point...

      But the great one said it better than him.

      Today, a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration—that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively. There is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we're the imagination of ourselves.- Bill Hicks.

  37. Paul Renault


    Electro-smog fouling up your spell-checker?

  38. Mike_JC

    I suppose this is what is to be expected from someone who invented Mr Blobby.

  39. David Pollard

    EMP-pad a successor to EM-Drive?

    The EM-drive was featured in the Torygraph a week ago. Maybe Mr Edmonds thinks he can get a bit of lift from the wash as it zooms on by into the stratosphere.

    Mind you, the EM-drive was twice in receipt of DTI funding - £100,000 or so - just over a decade ago.

    It's reassuring to know, as Margaret Hodge informed us, that, "Highly qualified technical experts and academics carried out an assessment on behalf of the Department [of Trade and Industry]."

  40. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I've come to the conclusion

    That "certainty is only for imbeciles and deities".

    I don't class myself as either (despite what colleges say) so I dispair a little at the rush to call the guy names.

    We quite possibly are surrounded by all the information required to transcend this reality and the only thing stopping us is our own certainty that it couldn't possibly be, because that would be mad!

    Look at the flat earth stuff, oh how I laughed until I realised it could be used as an exercise in pulling apart my own beliefs, why do I think the earth is round? suppress laughter for a second and you can transport yourself back through childhood and see those key lessons being taught in a "because it is" mode, you may find the sparks of curiosity strangly bright even from this distance, it's a shame how much genuine interest we suppress to be normal, fit in, pay taxes and breed.

    I'm not sure how much David Ike stuff I follow but he has been calling Edward Heath a child murderer for years, strange nobody has called him out on it in the courts.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I've come to the conclusion

      "David Ike ... has been calling Edward Heath a child murderer for years, strange nobody has called him out on it in the courts."

      And others.

      Anyway, you watch your back.

      Talk like that might get you a visit from Special Branch, who after providing round the clock protection services for the PM for more than two decades will have a pretty good idea whether he's got anything to hide, anything to fear, or not.

      Or you might get a visit from someone who wants to vigorously suggest that you don't want to believe everything David Icke says.

      Be careful out there.

  41. Stevie


    Didn't Mr Edmunds get taken in by some idiot scheme about 40 years ago? Something to do with speedboats and unworkable "harmonically balanced" reciprocating engines?

    I think I saw the cutaway model for that engine once. It was very impressive. I could never make the geared pseudo-crank work on paper though. I figured I was missing something. I was. I was missing the fact that it was a tricked-up model for pushing a scam.

  42. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    It's probably the wig / dyed hair (I don't really care which) that makes him look 'young', along with dressing well, a make-up dept to conceal the cracks, an enjoyable job, ample amounts of cash, and a young lady to mess about with, etc.

    I assume he has considered how much 'electro-smog' is floating about in the studio, with all those wireless mics and cams?

    I admit I still find him quite amiable on Deal or No Deal, so I'm not going to let a bit of hippy nonsense cloud my opinion of him too much! (although, if I thought about it too deeply, I could be quite disgusted how he lets contestants make expensive mistakes based upon numerical hunches that are total BS - it's RANDOM!)

  43. John Savard

    Only 2,693 pounds

    Visited the web site of the people who make the EMPpad. A featured product was the Omnium1, a tablet with an extra-powerful battery, presumably to allow it to emit those electro-magnetic pulses that mimic the Earth's natural magnetic field. A steal at only £2,693.

    So to enjoy its health benefits, I fear one truly has to have more money than sense... at both ends.

  44. Trollslayer


    He cuts corners and a stuntman died.

    He made a fortune from the BBC then slated the license fee.


    1. RonWheeler

      Re: Scum

      So every employee who has ever slagged off their employer is scum?.

    2. Vic

      Re: Scum

      He cuts corners and a stuntman died.

      That wasn't a stuntman. It was an untrained member of the public.


      1. ravenviz Silver badge

        Re: Scum

        Not a professional stuntman anyway!

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This electrosmog

    Could it be weaponised? I can think of a few people who deserve a quick blast up the chakras.

  46. Henry Wertz 1 Gold badge

    There's a whole industry of these devices

    There's a whole industry of various devices here in the US at least. I'm not sure how large an industry but at the prices they charge I'm sure it's very profitable.

    Some devices will claim to do whatever and turn out to have nothing at all in there (they're either an empty box or have a few electronic bits but they aren't actually hooked up to the mains or inductively coupled to it or anything.)

    A few technically do what they claim -- not the effects, those are pure "pseudo-science" (I hesitate to raise most descriptions to the level of pseudo-science so I put it in quotes.) But, for example, if it claims to make a magnetic field, it'll turn out to have a magnet or electromagnet in it (along with an LED or two that will light up when it's plugged in to "tell you it's working".) You could of course just buy a magnet for like 1% the cost.

    Don't get me wrong, I assume they're effective for the people that buy them. Some studies have shown the vast majority of people sensitive to wifi, "cell phone radiation", and so on, it's pure placebo effect (being effected by something because you think it's effective.) If they've convinced themselves all these things are affecting them, then I suppose the placebo effect from some random device will counteract the first placebo effect pretty well.

  47. Roj Blake Silver badge

    Brass Eye

    For some, I can't help wondering if Edmonds has been given his comments by Chris Morris

  48. enormous c word

    "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic" - Arthur C. Clarke.

    but, yes, this is just a load of old New Age Hippy b******s.

  49. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Icke and Phil have doubles.

    So our Noel says that people tell him that he doesn't look 66. Perhaps that's because they don't like to hurt his feelings by telling him that actually, in the flesh he looks 96 !

    He'll be telling us next that Phil the Greek died at 80, and a body double who's had plastic surgery has taken his place. After all, Prince Phil is very sprightly and agile for a 94 year old isn't he ?

    Does David Icke know he's got a challenger, or is Noel a body double for him as well ? Has anyone seen them both together on a live show ?

  50. James 100

    "If you want to be happy you need to think of yourself as a container of energy."

    I think of him as a container of natural fertiliser, do you think that's close enough?

  51. N2

    Snake oil, snake oil

    Come & get it, £2000 a bottle


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