back to article FLYING PIG crash-lands in Utah: Rider survives, bacon saved

Heartwarmingly, news has reached us here on the Register flying-cars-and-related-matters desk that a large flying pig has crashlanded in Utah. The airborne porker's rider suffered only minor injuries. The incident took place recently in the town of Provo, Utah, where locals were celebrating the anniversary of the Land of the …

  1. msknight

    Did it...

    ...have a collision with a low flying chair suspended by helium filled balloons, perchance?

    If so, you can say to Canada, "Found it!" - http://www.theregister.co.uk/2015/07/07/canuck_cuffed_over_flying_chair_stunt/

  2. Khaptain

    Mistaken Identities

    The pilots real name was Link HogThrob and that second balloon was piloted by Steve Miller.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I've been to Provo

    It wasn't that interesting.

    Now, flying pigs are the sort of thing they really need.

  4. Ralph B

    So ...

    So, a high cowboy poked a pig, causing severe depression in the pig, and the pig's owner blew off a load of hot air.

    Sounds like everyday life in Utah.

  5. Stoneshop Silver badge
    Flame

    New form of lift

    "What saved my bacon, was that the head of the pig held a lot of hot air and helped the balloon to descend at a safer rate,"

    Make a balloon shaped like a politician, and you don't even need burners to get off the ground

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
      Devil

      Re: New form of lift

      Make a balloon shaped like a politician

      When a 100' tall grinning Tony Blair goes floating past my window, I am going to hunt you down and take revenge for coming up with that idea!

      Actually he probably wouldn't do it. Much more likely is the Boris Balloon.

      You're going to burn in hell...

      1. Jedit Silver badge
        Devil

        "When a 100' tall grinning Tony Blair goes floating past my window"

        "Mr Notspartacus, you stand accused of firing multiple shotgun blasts into a 100' hot air balloon shaped like the head of Tony Blair, causing thousands of pounds of property damage and a serious public disturbance. There are twenty-seven witnesses to you performing these acts, and the police found you with the shotgun still in your hands. And yet you continue to protest your innocence. How can you possibly justify such a claim?"

        "Your Honour, I thought it was the real thing."

        "Case dismissed." *thunk*

        1. This post has been deleted by its author

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: New form of lift

        When a 100' tall grinning Tony Blair goes floating past my window

        100' is just the smile. That man's smile was the word "smarmy" personified.

        Ugh. Anyone seen the mind bleach?

    2. Fred Flintstone Gold badge

      Re: New form of lift

      Make a balloon shaped like a politician, and you don't even need burners to get off the ground

      Mind you, it was already sponsored by a bank, so they weren't far off.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: New form of lift

      I certainly wouldn't want to be piloting anything large and resembling a politician in a land where so many people own guns.

      Inflatable vs ballistics... I don't like the chances.

    4. Tom 7 Silver badge

      Re: New form of lift

      A relative of mine in the US has a condom shaped balloon. Alas it lives in the garage most of the time as it seems to piss off a lot of people over there and guns, lots and lots of guns....

  6. Your alien overlord - fear me

    You took a few days to verify the facts? The Land of the Oppressed was set free by us Brits over 200 years ago. We had to make it look like we cared about keeping it but lets face it, thank f*ck we got rid of the dead weight when we did.

    Or did you mean the story of the flying bacon butty filler?

  7. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
    Happy

    Quick thinking that man!

    What, for coming up with turning the burners to full? Anyone could have done that.

    No. For getting "what saved my bacon" into his press interview, of course.

    1. dotdavid

      Re: Quick thinking that man!

      He didn't make a pig's ear of the landing either.

      1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

        Re: Quick thinking that man!

        Although he did end up sandwiched between 2 piles of bricks. Butty spoke of his survival with relish - and I'm sure the journalists didn't grill him too hard.

        ...I should probably stop now...

        1. Khaptain

          Re: Quick thinking that man!

          Yes, luckily he wasn't too ham-fisted with those and avoided up as barbecued chops...he didn't even squeal about the swine that butchered his balloon. At the of the day I am sure that he finished this adventurous little trot with a nice pint of the 'ol pig's ear'.

  8. Graham Marsden
    Thumb Up

    Ah...

    .... Bootnotes!

  9. hatti

    Scratchings

    Can you make pork scratchings out of pig ballon write offs?

  10. Stevie

    Bah!

    Lucky bugger is lucky to be alive.

    1. Khaptain

      Re: Bah!

      There is a certain amount of redundancy in Steve's comment

  11. Mark 85 Silver badge

    So pigs do fly? This explains a lot that's been happening lately and it's not all good.

  12. x 7

    was he auditioning for a part in a Pink Floyd show?

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    hate to see where the ballast got dropped from....

  14. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

    "We're sorry we were a bit slow getting on this story, but we thought it was critical to inform our readers of such a major event even though we're a few days late"

    Hah! Nice to that El Reg reads and takes on board at least some of the comments :-)

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2022