back to article Yahoo! displaces Ask in Oracle's Java update crapware parade

At the annual Yahoo! shareholder's meeting, CEO Marissa Mayer unveiled her new strategy for making the struggling web portal popular again by buying its way into Oracle's Java upgrade software. Begining with the next Java update, Yahoo! will replace the current invitation to make Ask your default search engine. Instead, you'll …

  1. Mark 85 Silver badge

    So now Yahoo! is volunteering (paying) to replace Ask as the most useless search engine? I'm not sure if this is pathetic or just more of the downhill slide to oblivion.

    1. K

      Couldn't have put it better!

      I've always wonder how the f*ck Ask manages to stay in business, its a relic of a bygone era.

      1. Nick Ryan Silver badge

        Maybe there's some money to be made from installing ****ing useless and pointless toolbars that do nothing other than slow down the browser and make it crash more often?

        Other than that... yeah. Almost as relevant as AOL.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      So we now have Oracle Crapware that in turn installs Yahoo Crapware?!

  2. Andy Non Silver badge

    Looks like Yahoo has a death wish. Getting their search engine on people's computers using nefarious means is just going to piss folks off.

    Even Yahoo's free email addresses are becoming less useful, demanding a phone number for confirmation by SMS when setting up an account. My existing Yahoo email accounts all died when I switched to another Internet service provider - Yahoo insisted I connected via my old IP address to prove my account hadn't been hacked. Impossible to do, so Yahoo lost yet another customer. Can't say I miss the Yahoo webmail though... after they "upgraded" it with a ton of unwanted bloat it became almost unusable on a slow internet connection.

  3. matchbx
    FAIL

    wow..didn't know yahoo would sink so low

    Sometimes I would visit Yahoo for answers to questions I was searching for....never again. Just added Yahoo to my blocked site list.... just in case I forget.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    On one hand I am glad the Ask crapware/malware is gone, on the other hand it is a bit disapointing they do not just call it quits on the Java browser plug in. Java has strength on the server side in business and some utility for the standard client, trying to stay in the plug in market has not had much hope for upside in like two decades and has turned them into a security joke/irritation.

  5. Nate Amsden

    sounds like a waste

    if ask has only 0.26% share, what does yahoo hope to gain? obviously distributing with java wasn't an effective strategy for ask.

  6. Erik4872

    Great

    The JRE crapware bundle is the main reason why we have to maintain managed installs of JRE. That, and the frequent "security patches" that block more and more features from running without a million changes.

    I know Oracle targets both businesses and consumers with the Java installs, but I've counted 3 major changes in the last 2 years in the way JRE handles security, all of which required changes to certificate stores, client settings, etc. just to get some lousy line of business app running its applets.

  7. RISC OS

    Who the hell uses Java nowadays?

    This should get them three or four people at most using yahoo as their homepage... and none of them will actually want that, it just be done by accident.

    1. Your alien overlord - fear me

      Re: Who the hell uses Java nowadays?

      anyone dealing with Android phones/tablets and presumably iPhones as well.

    2. Wade Burchette Silver badge

      Re: Who the hell uses Java nowadays?

      One of the reasons why I wanted HD DVD to win the format battle was because it didn't use Java.

      1. JLV

        Re: Who the hell uses Java nowadays?

        Well, alright, I dislike Java just as much as the other guy. And I wanted HD DVD to win as well (mostly because I am not a fan of Sony).

        But hating on a physical disk system because its players can run a Java subsystem? The whole thing being totally, blissfully, hidden from the end user*, especially as there are probably tons of DRM-related reasons why you can't muck around in the player anyway?

        Seems like you might as well hate Java because the sky is blue. Which is fine, your choice, but still...

        * though... I wonder if the teething problems of early-generation Blu-Ray players, where all sorts of disks would not play because your firmware did not support version X.Y.Z of BD spec were not Java-caused. In which case, I retract all of the above snarkiness and agree fully with you. Kind of settled now, but I originally bought a PS3 just for BD playback because it had a good reputation about keeping up with the moving BD spec targets which was not the case for many 2007-vintage players.

    3. Bryan Hall

      Re: Who the hell uses Java nowadays?

      Anyone who needs the power of a fat client without the installation and update headaches associated with one. Java Web Start isn't at all perfect, but it sure beats the alternatives.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Who the hell uses Java nowadays?

        "Anyone who needs the power of a fat client without the installation and update headaches associated with one. "

        You clearly have never had to manage Java JRE deployments. Updates are a nightmare. Multiple conflicting and incompatible versions with multiple new critical security vulnerabilities all the time.

        "Java Web Start isn't at all perfect, but it sure beats the alternatives."

        You need to try .Net - faster - more flexible, multiple language choices, far better backward compatibility, vastly more secure, no coexistence issues, etc. etc.

    4. Kevin McMurtrie Silver badge

      Re: Who the hell uses Java nowadays?

      Java is still used heavily for server software, software development tools, and mobile apps. It's an excellent language when used properly.

      I suspect that Yahoo is targeting the 4 or 5 people who install the the browser Applet plugin because some porn malware asked them to. Bundling this junk with the bare runtime or JDK tools would hasten the death of Oracle too.

  8. Fuzz

    Offline installer

    Always use the offline installer, it doesn't contain ask and won't contain Yahoo! It's a pain when you update because you can't use the auto updater, you have to go and download the full offline installer again.

  9. Charles Manning

    Do you want Yahoo as your default search engine?

    [NO]

    Please... please....

    [NO]

    I implore you...

    [NO]

    You'll make me cry (along with picture of Marissa].

    ...

    New low for Ya who?.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Yahoo ?

    Sorry I'll have to Google that one.

  11. Morten Bjoernsvik
    Joke

    wrong headliner

    Yahoo! displaces! Ask! in! Oracle's! Java! update! crapware! parade!

  12. SQL God

    Oracle is the best ticket a HUGE POWERFUL RDBMS. (Expensive and hard to manage, but I'm not complaining.)

    Java... Well that's another story. For most users and most apps... why? Huge resource hog, so if you don't use it, chuck it AND Yahoo.

  13. Terry 6 Silver badge

    What!!

    We have definitely made sure that our onboarding process is one that is highly transparent and gives users choice,"

    So we're being onboarded now.

    Next time I see pigeons doing what they do, I'll know to call it onboarding.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Flame

      Re: What!!

      "You are now being processed for onboarding to make it easier for you to discover rich and relevant content about products and places" to mix the enticing Yahoo and Twitter experience promises.

      This FEMA trailer is departing on ramp 12.

      I noticed Yahoo now stoops to mixing actual news from AP wire with "sponsored content" showing money and tits under ludicrous headlines held in the same style, cleverly massaged with geolocation information to appear as "local news". Fraud in the purple palace? Well I never! It's just some slight onboarding!

  14. Your alien overlord - fear me

    I remember when Ask Jeeves was new and fresh and a more 'human interface' on searching unlike Google who (back then) only gave specific results for your searches unlike today when every search includes the 'Do you feel lucky punk?' option.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Liars and crooks

    Many years ago I had occasion to ask Oracle why they bundled this crapware, and they told me that they didn't want to, but they had inherited the contract from Sun. And here we are, over a decade later, and apparently Oracle is still inheriting the contract form Sun.

    Either that or they lied to me. I suppose that's possible?

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
      Angel

      Re: Liars and crooks

      What Oracle? Behave unethically and dishonestly? I won't have it! They are the fluffiest, cuddliest, most loveable company-wompany in all of toyland.

      Next you'll be trying to tell me that Facebook don't respect our privacy...

  16. akeane
    Alert

    Why don't they...

    ... go full 1990s and install the RealPlayer malwarez as well?

    1. AegisPrime
      FAIL

      Re: Why don't they...

      Don't even joke about that - I still find that POS on peoples laptops. Seriously, why won't it DIE???

  17. Stevie

    Bah!

    Business model failing. Customers jumping overboard faster than Tiotanic's steerage passengers. Every change made by Hip Yoof Croo just making matters worse. Only answer: Sneak crappy unwanted product onto people's computers befopre they notice.

    Seriously, if nothing else this should teach even the geriatrics to uncheck that box.

  18. Robert Grant Silver badge

    That's weird

    I downloaded the installer, and it tried to install Java!

    Looks like Marissa's been applying her legendary focus there as well.

  19. John Tserkezis

    The deal is also a huge loss to Ask.

    Cry me a river.

  20. Schlimnitz

    Seems appropriate to post this

    Save this to a .reg file, double click and live in piece (note, not sure if this still works)

    Windows Registry Editor Version 5.00

    [HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\JavaSoft]

    "SPONSORS"="DISABLE"

    [HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Wow6432Node\JavaSoft]

    "SPONSORS"="DISABLE"

  21. AbelSoul

    Gobbledygook

    our onboarding process

    Stop that, it's silly!

    And the fact that they are trumpeting this abominable method of software distribution as a good thing is thoroughly depressing.

  22. DToma

    I have never used Yahoo Search. I used Ask back when it was Ask Jeeves. Recently, I switched to DuckDuckGo Search. Yahoo may not ever be number 1, since Google has slipped into everyday jargon. A person is more likely to say, "you can google it if you want to learn the truth." So far, I have not heard anybody say, "you can yahoo it if you want to learn the truth."

  23. jnffarrell1

    A Good way to hasten the end of JAVA

    Switching people off their defaults is a way to aggravate people to switch away from those employing the 'my way or the highway' tactic. Linux anyone?

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