INTERNET of BOOBS: Scorching French lass reveals networked bikini The French have updated their classic two-piece swimsuit with a networked version which will inform its wearers when they need to apply sunscreen. The connected bikini (en français, bikini connecté) contains a removable and (wisely) waterproof UV sensor which will measure when its wearers may need to lather themselves in …
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"Unless it is sized to fit a Kardashian "Imperial Drednought" displacement a**e of course."
The video gave me a reality check. I had almost forgotten that young women could be slim without being the media image"heroin-chic". My daily walk reveals a preponderance of the new "extended" size in both sexes.
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If you're already exposed to strong UV, it's usually too late to start applying sun cream as that takes a few minutes to be effective. A dog-tag worn round the neck or attached to the shoulder straps, similar to a radiation detector, probably makes more sense as it measures the actual UV exposure rather than the intensity probably makes more sense.
Still, full marks for suggesting that the software was developed by women (I've no idea whether it was or not and I'm not suggesting it wasn't).
Yes it is old chap.
Twas named after Bikini Atol in the mid 40s and I think it was 'invented' by a French engineer called Louis Réard who had a bit too much time on his hand and access to bohemian crumpet as models. Bikini Atoll was 'a la mode' at the time due to French testing of nuclear bombs.
Now the Italians invented the tank with rear view mirrors so that they could see the enemy in 'front ' of them. It had 1 speed forward and 6 reverse I seem to recall .
Your post appears to say that the French were testing nuclear bombs at Bikini Atoll in the mid-40s. I think they were actually otherwise engaged at the time.
The "joke" about Italian tanks is pretty tired, though to be fair to the Italians I was once at a motorcycle show with an Italian colleague, and as we looked at the MV Agusta 500 he remarked "You know people make jokes about the Italian Army, but we certainly do make the world's best getaway vehicles."
@Bloakey1
One thing bothers me about your (current) case, though: in order to qualify as witnesses, wouldn't those same people have had to spend as much time, in the same location as you, doing approximately the same amount of "witnessing" as you are alleged to have done? That would be creepy, no? Just askin', like.
"surely a seismograph will suffice for that"
This is what gets me about the whole thing.
If there had been no earthquake, would there have been no prosecution?
What if the local god had actually thought "Nice pair of boobs, for that I'll downgrade this one from a 7 to a 5.3"?
Having seen what happpened in Italy, with seismologists locked up for the crime of working in an imperfect science, I do wonder whether the truth of this is that people go apeshit irrational over earthquakes and the foreigners would have been in trouble no matter what they had done, simply because the credibility of the local headman depends on somebody having done something to cause the wrath of the God, otherwise it looks like it's all a bit random and his conduit to the deity looks a bit useless.
They were all a little bit silly but I think that the major mistake of the unfortunate young aeronautical engineer was of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
"Needs gps with a warning"
That could have saved some mountain climbers a bit of trouble caused by their overexposure.
You could also use your Iphone.
Set it to ring an alarm when you are ready to turn over and also to remind you to post on Facebook that you are turning over. You could also set smaller incremental alarms to tell you to update your tanning progress on Twitter and you could use your selfie stick to scratch your pudendum or pudenda when you can't be arsed moving.
"We really are rushing headlong into a WallE world."
When people have an automaton to do some job then they lose their own skill at that task. Eventually they trust it even when it is patently wrong eg GPS.
Unless the suntan sensor works on the effect of UV on the exposed area of skin then it will give a false sense of security. People apply suntan blocker in varying amounts - and it tends to wash off after a dip.
The result would probably be more people being sunburned.
"WTF does temperature have to do with UV exposure?"
And anyway, if the sensor is stuck in the bikini won't it be measuring body temperature?
I know skin temperature is generally a bit below core temperature, and varies from place to place, so I'll put myself forward for conducting temperature measuring experiments on areas of the body normally in contact with the bikini. Purely in the name of science and sensor calibration of course :)
I was thinking of providing an app so that when the bikini calls for the aplication of sun block, it will forward the call to me, whereupon I will apply the cream.
I reserve the right to decline customers who are: male, not good looking, hairy armpits,have a large irate boyfriend/husband etc.
"Excuse me mademoiselle, you appear to be getting a sunburn. You might want to put on some sunscreen or step inside for a while."
Wow. That would have done the same thing!
And it didn't require anyone to wire up their bikini or create an app for it.
Yes. Talking. It works!
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