back to article Amazon boss Bezos' Blue Origins declares test flight 'flawless' ... if you overlook one snafu

Blue Origins, the rocket company started by Amazon supremo Jeff Bezos, has staged its first test flight – with mixed results. Youtube Video The New Shepard rocket launched from the firm's test site in Texas on Wednesday – although word of the blastoff emerged on Thursday afternoon. It reached its target altitude of 307,000 …

  1. HildyJ Silver badge

    Twig minus berries

    I wish Blue Origins luck but I have to say that the look of the rocket is definitely on the Blue side. A bit phallusy, don't you think. I'll leave the Uranus jokes to other comments.

    1. Neil Barnes Silver badge

      Re: Twig minus berries

      I'm glad I wasn't the only one wondering where Flesh Gordon was...

      (Probably not safe for work but it was in the Guardian so maybe image: http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Film/Pix/pictures/2009/3/3/1236083459176/Flesh-Gordon--002.jpg)

      But as you say - best of luck with this one. Though perhaps it's just a backup plan if the drones delivery thing doesn't work?

      1. Mark 85 Silver badge

        Re: Twig minus berries

        Have an upvote for the reference. I was thinking the same thing and wondering if the designer was a fan of that movie.

        1. Dave 126 Silver badge

          Re: Twig minus berries

          I'm normally dubious of people who claim that rockets and towers are always phallic symbols, referring back to Freud himself who said "Sometimes a big cigar is just a big cigar". However, in this case they have a point!

          1. TechicallyConfused

            Re: Twig minus berries

            Pleased I read this because I was just about to suggest a similar sort of thing. It does look a bit like a lady's pleasure device.

            1. Andy The Hat Silver badge

              Re: Twig minus berries

              "Pleased I read this because I was just about to suggest a similar sort of thing. It does look a bit like a lady's pleasure device."

              Doesn't look anything like a shopping trolley ...

              1. Oninoshiko

                Re: Twig minus berries

                I suppose that makes it more (in)appropriate that I misread "blue origins" and "blue orgasms"

      2. Ralph B

        Re: Twig minus berries

        True. They even put a vein running down the length of it.

      3. Dan Paul

        Re: Twig minus berries @ Neil Barnes

        Yes, but what does Docter Flexi Jerkoff have to say about it? Or Emporer Wang the Perverted

        Cum to think of it, that rocket looks like it was derived from those Penisaurii that Flesh battled.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Twig minus berries @ Neil Barnes

          What's wrong with you people?

          1. Kharkov
            Joke

            Re: Twig minus berries @ Neil Barnes

            Could we say we've found your Mom's...

            Nah, better not risk it...

            Your Mom's evening friend?

            Ok, I'm going, I'm going...

    2. Peter Simpson 1
      Happy

      Re: Twig minus berries

      It looks like a giant...

      Dick! Old buddy! How are you?

    3. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

      Re: Twig minus berries

      Yup, I was thinking the same thing. Then my wife voiced what I only dared think and said, that doesn't look like a proper rocket, it looks like a huge dilldo!

  2. gregthecanuck
    Angel

    We don't need no steenkin' hydraulics

    " ... unfortunately we didn’t get to recover the propulsion module because we lost pressure in our hydraulic system on descent."

    I believe SpaceX may have some experience and advice in that department! :-)

    Congrats to the Blue Origins team. Another step towards lowering the costs of getting into space.

    OK, so between SpaceX and Blue Origin which one is Ford and which one is Chevy? ;-)

    1. phuzz Silver badge
      Flame

      Re: We don't need no steenkin' hydraulics

      Well Blue Origin is almost Blue Oval, so they can be Ford and Space X can be Chevy. Although SpaceX as Tesla makes a better choice if you compare Detroit to the old school rocket firms.

      >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> about time we had a rocket icon?

    2. Mike Flugennock

      Re: We don't need no steenkin' hydraulics

      Ford vs. Chevy? Nahhh.

      More like Lamborghini (SpaceX) vs. Yugo (Blue Origins).

  3. Martin Budden Bronze badge

    fast descent

    The commentary in the second video said the capsule was descending at a steady 24 feet per second, which makes for a pretty big bump at landing. Anyone know if it has landing rockets like the Soyuz?

    1. et tu, brute?

      Re: fast descent

      According to www.spaceflight101.com/soyuz-spacecraft-information.html, it's 2 to 4 m/s for the Soyuz, i.e. between 6.56167979 and 13.1233596 feet/s... So this capsule comes down at almost double the speed (at the moment)

  4. Voland's right hand Silver badge

    Impressive, quite impressive

    So which one of the Amazon packagings (A7 maybe?) will this "drone" deliver. Can I order a scheduled delivery of "flowers" to someone I like? Do I need a Prime account?

    All right, jokes aside - very impressive. With that engine they are only a few steps away from orbital flight - it is the same thrust as the engines in the Falkon 9 (~440 or thereabouts). That is more than enough to put a payload into orbit. Or a Prime delivery on some dictator's lawn.

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
      Happy

      Re: Impressive, quite impressive

      Thankyou. Your order has been successfully processed and will be delivered today via our special Get it There Instantly[tm] delivery option. For your records, please find a copy of your order below.

      1. 1 x bouqet of flowers - $30.00

      Special Delivery: Get it There Instantly[tm] - $55,000,000.00

      Thank you for your order.

  5. Will Shaw

    Sorry, but https://youtu.be/GiWQZhUmmRw

  6. Oninoshiko

    As the Americans say:

    So, other than that, how did you enjoy the play, Mrs. Lincoln?

  7. Peter Simpson 1
    Mushroom

    LOHAN?

    Assume the LOHAN crew has a phone call in to Elon, to ask him how he managed to get his flight permit?

    // Suspect it has to do with campaign contributions...of the largish kind.

  8. Floydian Slip
    Black Helicopters

    ICDM

    Nice to see a near perfect success for Amazon's new ICDM (Inter Continental Delivery Mechanism) so there's drones for deliveries pretty close to the depot, ICDMs for people living (a lot) farther away, now all they have to do is address the pesky Courier Module for people living between those two extremes.

  9. Mike Flugennock
    Coat

    Giant vibrators -- IN SPAAAAAAAAAAACE

    Sorry, couldn't resist.

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