back to article New iGasm: Apple to unveil not one but TWO iPhone 6 models on 9 Sept

Apple will, we're told, hold a "big media event" on Tuesday, September 9, which is expected to be the day the long-awaited iPhone 6 is officially revealed. El Reg's invite to the bash appears to have been lost in the post; instead we learned word of the launch party from the Wall Street Journal and others. Bloomberg reckons …

  1. NP-Hardass
    Holmes

    Left out

    The more pertinent question is, how will El Reg respond if it doesn't get an invite?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Fanbois

      Running around is a headless chicken state trying to decide...

      Big one or small one? Big one or small one? Big one or small one?

    2. g e

      Re: Left out

      Left out the best response:

      "Meh"

      1. g e

        Re: Left out

        Or even

        "Nah, playing Destiny"

  2. James Haley 2
    Mushroom

    If the invite arrives...

    If El Reg gets an invite, your crack reporters would probably be more effectively used covering the apocalypse.

    1. big_D Silver badge

      Re: If the invite arrives...

      They could send along a heckler... Every time Tim says something about a new feature, the Vulture coughs "Android does that," "WP does that," or "Blackberry does that."

    2. RealFred

      Re: If the invite arrives...

      Crack reporters report on cracks, nothing else

      1. DiViDeD Silver badge

        Re: If the invite arrives...

        Should be OK for reporting on the screens of the odd dropped iPhone then

  3. Scott Earle

    If El Reg gets an invite

    They will be too shocked to do anything about it.

    ("Jagwyre", remember?)

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sept 9 is day Mao died

    Apple is going out of its way to hurt the feelings of all Chinese by desecrating the day our glorious leader is remembered.

    1. Dr Scrum Master
      Coat

      Re: Sept 9 is day Mao died

      maybe they should postpone it and hold it 2 days later instead?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Sept 9 is day Mao died

      Apple is going out of its way to hurt the feelings of all Chinese by desecrating the day our glorious leader is remembered.

      It is a celebration to Maos memory. After all him and his party made it possible for Apple to get the 60% profit on each device sold through the cheap labour

      1. Philip Lewis

        Re: Sept 9 is day Mao died

        "... After all him and his party made it possible for Apple to get the 60% profit on each device sold through the cheap labour"

        ... and consigned 10's of millions of fellow Chinese to death by starvation and worse in the glorious name of a broken ideology.

        1. hplasm
          Alert

          Re: Sept 9 is day Mao died

          "... and consigned 10's of millions of fellow Chinese to death by starvation and worse in the glorious name of a broken ideology."

          Wow.

          Apple have a lot to answer for...

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Still with the rumors

    So because Bloomberg is reporting a rumor that two models will be announced that day, the Reg uses it as the headline?

    They don't know any better than anyone else has for the past few months, and I'm sure with a whole five weeks to wait, we'll be treated to multiple stories about how the 5.5" model is delayed due to shortages/delays/manufacturing issues/Steve Jobs rising from the grave and make them redo the design. Or that they changed their mind and aren't doing it at all. Or that 5.5" will be the only model and there won't be a 4.7". Or that there will be initial shortages and few will ship until October. Or that Apple will sell 100 million by Christmas. Or that September 9th will be to announce the iWatch, not the iPhone, which won't arrive until next year.

    1. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

      Re: Still with the rumors

      You are late, far too late. A whole slew of Chinese 'Analysts' have been predicting all sorts of production problems with the new models for months.

      The only thing remarkable is that they are speaking out of the part of their body that the first four letters of their job title name and they don't seem to realize it yet they continue to 'find' new stories almost every day.

    2. Moeluk

      Re: Still with the rumors

      I think you'll find bloomberg just re-reported it, it was actually the AllThingsD team that reported it initially, and seeing as that group contains, much loved Walt Mossberg, who never publishes bullshit when it comes to Apple, i'd consider it a fairly reliable source.

  6. Eric Hood

    So the same as last year then, as the iPhone 5s and 5c were introduced.

    The earth did not shatter last year. I doubt it will do so this year.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Well, coming out with two new models, rather than a new model that's an incremental update of last year's model and a "discount" model that's a repackaging of last year's model in a different case, is a lot different.

      Also that Apple is venturing into the phablet segment, which may bring some who left for Android due to size back and keep some who were thinking about leaving in the Apple fold. So its important in that way. It will also be interesting to see what the sales mix between the two sizes is, and see what it does to sales of the iPad Mini.

      It isn't Earth shattering by any means, but it is a lot bigger than what they introduced last year.

  7. Mitoo Bobsworth

    iGasm?

    Makes me think of this brief but brilliant p*sstake from some years back!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i4-ReZh0sQw

  8. Joe 48

    Yawn...

    And in other news crowd funding buys rabbit a wheelchair....

  9. Sealand
    Meh

    What to do?

    Chuck the invite and go to the beach or whatever. There'll be no "insanely great" news that day.

    Now, if Apple manages to fix iMessage and make iCloud work so it's possible to understand what the heck is going on - AND if the new iOS accompanying the alleged iPhone 5S++ does not slow anything but the shiny new iThing down to a crawl - then bring out the large typeface and tell us.

  10. Big_Ted
    Headmaster

    Very confusing title......

    "New iGasm: Apple to reveal not one but TWO iPhone 6s on Sept 9th "

    I read that as Apple bypassing the iphone six and releaseing 2 versions of the iphone 6s

    Surely it should have read 6's ......

    1. J. R. Hartley

      Re: Very confusing title......

      No!

  11. Tony Paulazzo

    Seriously

    Is anyone even excited by a new phone release anymore? Short of a holographic display that protrudes up from the phone screen in Real3D(TM), or a contact lens that doubles as a wireless screen, what can they show? except a slightly larger, maybe stronger screen, a bit longer battery life - jeez, even onboard voice processing would be a start, mind you, Android already does that.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Seriously

      It's been leaked everywhere. Everything from the case to the ribbon cable that connects the buttons has been leaked and can be viewed online. I think the Apple excitement on a phone launched peaked at the 4S.

      Everything since has been leaked well in advance. Only phone launch I'm excited about is the Galaxy Note 4 since Samsung have done a good job at suppressing all leaks so far.

      1. Paw Bokenfohr

        Re: Seriously

        "It's been leaked everywhere. Everything from the case to the ribbon cable that connects the buttons has been leaked and can be viewed online."

        ...while I'm personally not getting excited about the iPhone 6 launch, the case and ribbon cable are not what people care about / get excited about.

        "I think the Apple excitement on a phone launched peaked at the 4S."

        ...wishful thinking.

        "Only phone launch I'm excited about is the Galaxy Note 4 since Samsung have done a good job at suppressing all leaks so far."

        ...yawn, just like iPhone 6 launch.

  12. Liam Westley

    Or, we'll be spell checking our poll questions?

    Maybe it's that pesky Android keyboard ...

  13. D@v3

    Response to 'Invite'

    Hi Tim.

    We'd love to come to your event, but we're busy at a Samsung event at that time.

    Thanks

    El Reg

  14. Slacker@work

    I refer the honourable readers...

    ...to my comment of September 2013 and the previous Apple release, (which is here if you are bothered: http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/1/2013/09/10/apple_iphone_5c_and_5s/ )

    *goes back to sleep*

  15. g e

    OMFG 9th September!!!!!

    Destiny for PS4!

  16. Dave Ross

    I shall be trying not to break my jaw by yawning.

  17. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
    Happy

    FIP investigative journalism

    A proper journo would be climbing through the toilet window with a fake badge round their neck, in order to see the great event.

    Alternatively, if security is too high for that, you take a fellow journo of similar looks to the pub, cosh them and tie them up, then go in on their ID.

  18. Velv
    Gimp

    You missed an option on the Poll

    "Don't be stupid, El Reg is never going to be invited to an Apple event"

  19. D 17

    Didn't Apple announce 2 models last time?

  20. Rugster

    Wear a warm coat

    Because if hell has frozen over then it will be bloody cold up here.

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