back to article Glastonbury debuts festival wide Wi-Fi network - fitted to COWS

It's one of the great problems of modern times. How does the average thirty-something festival-goer send their friends a Yo while off their chops in some far-flung field? Luckily for the ageing denizens of Glastonbury, EE has stepped in with a flock of Wi-Fi equipped cows to make sure no meal remains un-Instagrammed and no …

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  1. Spender

    So is it WiFi or 4G? The author seems confused...

    http://www.differencebetween.com/difference-between-4g-and-wifi/

    1. bluefin333

      WiFi with 4G backhaul presumably...

    2. steamrunner

      So... ?

      One presumes they are Wifi 'routers' (access points) with a 4G back haul across the site to EE. (It's not a small site, so I'm guessing blanket Wifi coverage is a no-go).

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "Staying connected has become an essential part of any festival-goer's experience"

    And here I am in my dottled old age thinking it had something to do with music.

    1. theblackhand

      Music at Glastonbury?

      It's much more important to be able to text your mates saying "I've just paid £££ to stay in a real bed at Glastonbury" than listen to music...

      http://www.woodlandsretreats.co.uk/special-breaks/glastonbury-festival

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      re: "And here I am in my dottled old age thinking it had something to do with music."

      Well, I wouldn't say it was about the music, but it's certainly not about "staying connected". It's about the whole experience, and a big part of that experience used to be being totally disconnected from the "normal" world outside.

  3. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

    Why fibreglass cows?

    Wouldn't real cows be just as effective?

    They could roam the festival site with WIFI stripped to their backs.

    1. Voland's right hand Silver badge

      Re: Why fibreglass cows?

      Yeah, I was just starting to think of the joys of managing the self-organizing network, adjusting the power in real time as the cows move, etc.

      Spoilsports... Fiberglass...

      1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

        Re: Why fibreglass cows?

        I suppose there is an issue with the smell and 'manure' problem

        - but the cows could get used to it.

    2. Ian Michael Gumby
      Boffin

      Re: Why fibreglass cows?

      I guess you've never been on a farm with cattle.

      Cattle are herd animals and the herd will wander away from crowds of humans.

      So all of your hotspots will be away from you. ;-)

      1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

        Re: Why fibreglass cows?

        And then the crowds of humans will run after the cows waving their iPads.

        At worst, both the cows and festival goers get some exercise - at best, some performance theatre that everyone else can enjoy

        1. Ian Michael Gumby

          Re: Why fibreglass cows?

          Again, you've never been around cows...

          While they are usually passive and want to get away... you corner them, any animal, and they will panic.

          Not good. I've seen a cow (not a bull) rip apart a pen trying to get out because she was being crowded and spooked by the farmhand trying to get the cow into the chute.

          (And yes, I've 'volunteered' to work the cattle when it became time to give them their medicines ...)

          Trust me. Even a spooked calf can be dangerous.

    3. JetSetJim
      Mushroom

      Re: Why fibreglass cows?

      Plus you could possibly power them on the methane emissions...

      1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
        Joke

        Re: Why fibreglass cows?

        Darn, fibreglass. I was hoping for a whole new meaning of "roaming internet", and "roaming (dis)charges"

    4. TRT Silver badge

      Re: Why fibreglass cows?

      Because they don't require PAT tests?

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Great...

    There goes some of the few days I get to go without suffering my cow orker and his obsession with music festivals... I always thought that the point of a Music Festival is to to get people to unplug for a while and pay attention to the band, not spend the entire time obsessing about what is going on outside of the fence.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Great...

      They're not obsessing with what is going on outside the fence, they're telling their friends what is going on inside the fence so they'll be jealous that they aren't there too.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Great...

        Technically that jealousy is happening outside of the fence :)

        Although my cow orker seems to think that I'd be jealous despite the fact I've never heard of the bands performing nor did paying a week's pay surrounded by loud, unwashed people (If I wanted that, I'd just take a RyanAir flight to France)

        1. Beamerboy

          Re: Great...

          Well I'll be there, with my Smartphone stubbornly set to 'dumb' - how else is the battery going to last 5 days, it's not a Nokia 3110 any more!

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Unless you were at

    The original Glasto's and the IOW festivals (plus the odd Stones in Hyde Park etc) you wern't considered to have 'been there' in the late 1960's/early 1970's.

    now they seem to be one big marketing company's wet dream.

    From a 60yr old who still plays from time to time in a band (bass guitar), they suck big time. Far too commercial for us oldies.

    I shall be at Cropredy though. Far less commercial and fantastic bands playing especially Fairport Convention, Steve Hackertt and Austrailian Pink Floyd.

  6. Asylum Sam

    Im confused, ,

    is it a flock of wifi equipped cows? or a High-speed Herd of fibreglass cows? The article fails to distinguish, and the difference could be substantial, i mean, if it's a flock of cows, and said flock chooses to roost in a tree, then that tree is gonna be a dangerous place to sit under,,,,

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Joke

      Re: Im confused, ,

      There there, calm down. Someone needs a pat on the head...

      1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge

        Re: Im confused, ,

        Well, if he sits under that tree long enough...

  7. Robert E A Harvey

    I hope

    These are going to be methane powered.

  8. bigphil9009

    Oh I was there when it was still cool and now it's just a commercial borefest and blah blah blah blah blah

  9. PeterM42
    Joke

    Whiffy cows......

    .......commentards could go on MILKING this one for ages!

    (Sorry - it just had to be said)

  10. Smoking Gun

    IOW was terrible for connectivity, so many group selfies to post and so little 3G bandwidth, I endorse the use of cows.

    1. TRT Silver badge

      Cowes?

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Nice tech related story. Moving on, I've noticed the BBC plugging their coverage of the forthcoming 'Glasto' constantly. It's a bit of a pity that their coverage usually consists of very little actual music, but plenty of Mark Radcliff and Jo Wiley talking bollocks while wearing wellies or sandals, interviewing thick / stoned musicians whom I've neve heard of, or even worse, that bloody irritating woman who is now a radio 1 dj, 'reporting' on the festival, visiting the kids village and trying juggling and face painting. Play some sodding music!

  12. Velv
    Headmaster

    Pictures, or it never happened.

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