Och aye! It's the Loch Ness Monster – but only Apple fanbois can see it The Loch Ness monster presents one of the greatest mysteries of recent times. After all, who in their right mind would believe a great green beastie was lurking down at the bottom of a midge-ridden Scottish lake? Now the answer has been revealed, after it emerged Apple fanbois can use their fondleslabs or iPhones to peer at …
The artifact looks like a fish; you could make out the head, body, pectoral fins and tail. It's very symmetric, and the way the different regions are graded even suggests "it" has just surfaced and is about to begin diving back. The ship's contours are comparatively easy to miss – I didn't notice it until told what to look for. All in all, if I had seen this picture devoid of any context, I'd likely say "oh, it's just a whale shark or something".
It's only the fact we have no emotional attachment whatsoever to such fairy tales that makes it easy to dismiss the picture as an artifact of satellite imaging (don't know about you; I didn't bother checking whether satellite imaging could really generate these kinds of artifacts). But "true believers", I can totally imagine they will look at this picture and undoubtedly see the Loch Ness Monster – or the Virgin Mary, for that matter.
Yep, it's proof that there are still plenty of gullible potential tourists around, and that's all that matters.
And just think what the sight of a long arm in a plesioaur neck will do for this crowd - when they've ably demonstrated they were happy to spluff half a grand every time they saw some nob in a turtle-neck...
When it comes to the length of haggis legs, you have to remember that, in nature, there are clockwise and anti-clockwise varieties. The former has a longer left leg, and the latter a longer right leg. The reason that haggis has come down in price, and become more available over the last few years is the breakthrough in mating clockwise and anti-clockwise to produce the lowland haggis with equal length legs, which makes them easier to farm.
No - it's got to be TRUE. Its mebbie a wee bit fishy, but its probably one o' Alec's yes vote campaigners.
1. It's got rounded corners.
2. It ya look veery carfulie it's bein driven be a nae so wee haggis, AND ALL GOOD HAGGISESS HAVE ROUNDED CORNERS. (and bow leggies an rounded spurrenz)
3. I'm sure that's a frikkin laser on its wee nose.
Oh - it's Apple maps you say - That'll be the Thames then. It's either the latest coalition flagship policy sinking without trace or one of Master Millipede's bright ideas coming back to bite him.
Due to the shape of the loch (you don't call them lakes laddie!) it is common to see dark standing waves on the surface long after the ferry and other leisure boats have gone past. The water is always murky as its full of peat particles and floating trees that have been blown down in storms.
So don't get too excited yer eejits!
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