1. Corinne

    Worst job adverts

    I've seen some pretty awful job adverts in my time as I'm sure we all have, and thought it might be amusing if we recorded some of the best/worst (depending on your viewpoint). There are various types that have their own characteristics, I have some favorites.

    The ones where the advert was clearly written by either an HR drone or the recruitment agency, with zero understanding of the subject matter. This has sub-categories of requiring impossible experience, or consisting of a long list of buzz words and not much else.

    Those where the employer wants someone with a very mixed bag of unrelated skills like 1st line help desk, project planning and technical DBA/application support. The 2 main reasons for this are a) they are too stingy to pay for 2 people to do 2 unrelated jobs or b) they had someone who for whatever reason picked up lots of unrelated bits & pieces over the years and the employer then demands a clone of that person.

    The advert is so very specific that whoever wrote it has one particular person in mind, so they wrote the advert to suit that person - I call this "the MD's nephew" as much of the time the chosen person is a relative of someone with clout.

    Adverts where the rate/salary quoted is so incredibly low compared to typical rates for that role that you know the employer really has no sense of reality at all. There can be a number of reasons for these adverts e.g. there was someone doing the job for years, who took on higher level work but never received promotion or a decent pay rise, or the accountants think that a fair contract rate is to take the annual salary and divide it by the number of working days in a year (this is common with public bodies. Or those who just think that in the current economic climate they can offer half what was the going rate (or less) and still get good quality candidates.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Worst job adverts

      I believe what you call "the MDs nephew" also occurs where someone has picked up numerous extra job roles, and it is now necessary to employ someone to do what they were originally doing but changing the title/role and salary of the person who has picked up the extra responsibilities in order to free up the slot may not be possible for legal/regulatory/political reasons.

      Therefore a publicly advertised job role role is created but tailor made for this person.

      Internally no-one will be surprised when this person gets the job, but on paper the interview panel and HR can say that they were the best suited to the job.

      I call this variant "The Unofficial Promotion".

      1. Corinne

        Re: Worst job adverts

        Hmm, I wonder which the of these types the advert was that dropped into my inbox the other day. The requirements included must have a 2:1 Bachelor's degree, and must have less than 3 years working experience.

      2. jcitron

        Re: Worst job adverts

        This sounds like a position I was in. I worked for a place that shrank through attrition. As people were let go the few of us that remained got more and more to do. In 2004 I went from being just the system/network admin to order admin/customer admin as well. I would literally sit in my chair and jump from one job to another and had multiple workstations setup so I could place orders on one system and manage my computer room and network on the other.

        I can say I learned a lot too doing this. In the end I earned great respect from the customer base and could ship product worldwide without any issues with customs. I even got letters and compliments from freight forwarders and customers due to my great job,

        When all this ended, I was back in IT, at another company, but made use of my customer service skills in addition to my IT support skills. Learning to listen to people proved to be one of the best tools/skills I earned from that crazy job.

  2. Bottle_Cap
    Joke

    Anything with 'service desk' in the title?

  3. OzBob

    Avoid anything with "Guru" or "Jedi" in the title

    "Guru" means they have a thin layer of personnel supporting the infrastructure and / or are too stingy to pay for training or proper consultancy, so are asking a single expert to bail them out

    "Jedi" is just plain immature.

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