back to article Apple plans to waggle iNormous 4½-incher in fanbois' faces

Apple is preparing to unveil a new iPhone with a larger screen, it has been claimed. Fruity sources suggested to the Wall Street Journal that the new phone will come in two models. The first will have a screen of 4½ inches (11.4cm) measured diagonally, and a second version will boast a display of up to 5 inches (12.7cm). The …


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  1. Kevin Fairhurst

    Very Large Phone

    Has an acronym of VLP... But don't let facts get in the way of a good punch line! :)

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Very Large Phone

      And in any case it should be VLM (Very Large Mobe)

    2. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

      Re: Very Large Phone

      That proposed size isn't a Large phone let alone a Very Large one. (comparing it to one of Samsung's offerings)

      Ok, Beer O'clock looms.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      I have nothing to prove

      Unlike some 'small' men who drive 'big' cars, wear 'big' watches yet have small feet and small hands, I don't need a phallus symbol of a large phone to pull out to try to impress the ladies.

      Women are wise to the fact that large techno accoutrements are a strong indicator of small penis size.

      That is why I have a small phone. The initial discomfort always leads to complete satisfaction.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: I have nothing to prove

        A) NOBODY cares about what you like, what you think. NOBODY.

        B) My smoking hot gf in her twenties with a fancy for expensive hair and nails, stockings and high heels has a VLP, and calls my 5 inch xperia z1 too small. I'm soon to upgrade her and she wants a Nokia 1520 at 6inches. That is what she will get.

        C) Thankfully she deems my member a perfect size of just slightly larger than her upcoming screen.

        D) Phabulet.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: I have nothing to prove

        "I don't need a phallus symbol of a large phone..." - really? Your post says otherwise. I bet your mum still irons your Three Wolf Moon T-shirt every week for you.

  2. Richard 120


    Ha! I scoff at your request.

    1. spider from mars

      Re: Phablet

      It's a perfectly cromulent word.

  3. sandman


    Phablet, Phablet, Phablet, Phablet, etc...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Phablet

      Would the phablet be called phiagra by an chance?

      1. TheRealRoland

        Re: Phablet

        just use phlappy instead...

  4. ratfox
    Paris Hilton

    How about two sizes?

    Should Apple only ever sell one iPhones size at the time?

    Some people have small hands…

    1. John Bailey

      Re: How about two sizes?

      "Should Apple only ever sell one iPhones size at the time?"

      According to the iFanboys who are prone to ridiculing anything not of the sacred fruit..


      Because apparently the holy aspect ratio of magnificence is one handed down by the Steve himself. And it optimises the user experience in many shiny shiny ways..

      And apparently, "Nobody wants a big phone"

      "Some people have small hands…"

      Then they need to get bigger ones..

      Sorry, but this is Apple. Choice is not an option. I mean.. how are you going to know you have the best one, if there are choices.. Think of the market confusion.. think of the FRAGMENTATIION!!!!

      What next.. You want colours other than the classic turtleneck black, or the virginal white?

      1. ThomH

        Re: How about two sizes? (@John Baily)

        Don't forget blingtastic "champagne".

        Some have argued that the 5C is a backdoor way of bifurcating the product line. It's not unimaginable that the 5C equivalent (6C?) would get a slightly larger screen and the 5S a much larger one.

        What would be surprising is if anything happens before June at the earliest, or more likely September. I expect the same people who are taking a strong interest in the next iPhone now plan to start their Christmas celebrations this year in March.

    2. suspicious-mind

      Re: How about two sizes?

      >Some people have small hands…

      You know what they say... small hands, small...

      1. Grumpy Developer

        Re: How about two sizes?


      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: How about two sizes?

        ">Some people have small hands…

        You know what they say... small hands, small..."

        You listen to old wives tales then? you an old wife?

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: How about two sizes?

      "How about two sizes?

      Should Apple only ever sell one iPhones size at the time?

      Some people have small hands…"

      Stevie boy would be spinning in his grave.

      It's his way or the highway.

      Now run along out-dated luddites!

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Well bad news boys... I'm sure with such impressive dimensions - supplemented by the new 3D multimodal iVibrate, they'll hit the iSpot everytime.

    Right so when will they start manufacturing phones again?

  6. Sir Sham Cad


    "Your pictures and videos will look great on our new, bigger, iMax screen. What?"

  7. cambsukguy

    You have seen Movie 43 haven't you?

    The iBabe section particularly - everything else laughing at iToys is just second rate by comparison.

  8. Tom 38

    the average length of a British man's most valuable possession is 14cm to 16cm (5.5 to 6.3 inches) during moments of excitement, with a girth of between 12 and 13cm (4.7 and 5.1 inches).

    What are you talking about, my TV remote control is much smaller than that.

    1. Cliff

      Girth as radius, or circumference?

      1. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

        Given those measurements, what do you think?

    2. jonathanb Silver badge

      The remote control for a Roku is 5.5", and that is smaller than most TV remotes. Mine is 8", and I can't really see how you could fit the buttons on anything much smaller than that.

  9. Quentin North


    Im a self confessed fanbois, i have been an Apple owner since 1979, but if Apple do this I think they are losing their way (but not of the first time).

    Apple's USP, if you like, is not that it follows market demand (thats what Lenovo, Samsung, HTC etc do) but that they create market demand. The iPod and the iPhone show this. Sure there were similar products before hand, but the market exploded when Apple led the market to them. The same could be said of WIMP interface on computers. Before the Lisa and Mac, nobody knew they wanted one.

    To start to become consumer led is to lose your lead, and that, for Apple, is a dead end. They will never compete on price and they are not commodity mass market producers. I foresee a repeat of the Scully 90's coming up, with failed attempts to licence products or services to OEMs and little innovation from Apple themselves. Sell your stock now.

    1. joeW

      Re: Stupid

      Samsung occasionally manage to lead and create a market (the whole VLP/Phablet/etc market that we're discussing here for example). Granted they normally do it by slinging as many different models and makes at the wall as possible and seeing what sticks, but still.

    2. jai

      Re: Stupid

      Take it with a pinch of salt. the WSJ only says it got the info from "people familiar with the situation"

      Which probably means the Digitimes article last week. And THAT one cited "sources" in the manufacturing plants, but no one specific.

      And it's been proven that a Digitimes articles are nearly always wrong:

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Stupid

      Who says the 4.5" phone would be bigger? There's room to shrink the bezel on the 5/5S and increase the screen by 10% without increasing the size of the phone at all.

      Then they can have one that is genuinely larger for those who want something bigger.

      Saying that being "consumer led" is a terrible thing is kind of ridiculous. Apple does lead the market in a lot of ways, but even Steve Jobs couldn't see everything - he was willing to admit he was wrong about the size of the iPad. If he were still around Apple

  10. TrevorH

    VPL or VLP

    Surely a VPL is a Visible Pantie Line not a Very Phone Large. Perhaps you meant a VLP?

    1. Tom 38
      Thumb Up

      Re: VPL or VLP

      I like Ethernet VPLs.

  11. nuclearstar

    So can Samsung sue now saying apple has copied their design of large screen phones?

  12. Baron Ebaneezer Wanktrollop III


    If the size of your Apple device screen relates to the size of ones todger would strapping a 27" iMac to my wrist make me a hit with the ladies?

    Coz you know, ladies dig near 3 foot long penises right?

    1. proto-robbie

      Re: Sooooo....

      It's not the quantity, it's whether Richard Stallman likes it...

  13. ID10T


    It's only a matter of time before Apple put a Trademark in for this.

  14. Jon Double Nice

    How about MOBE

    rather than just mobe, so mobe is normal, MOBE is big/VPL/phablet?

    You can add exclamation points to indicate larger phones, so a MOBE!!! would be bigger than a MOBE! And phones in between MOBE and mobe could be MOBE? if its just a bit bigger.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Please let Google release iPhone drivers for their Glass device.

    iNormous Glasshole is simply too good not to use.

  16. Piro Silver badge

    Just a thought!






    1. TheOtherHobbes

      Re: Just a thought!

      I'm thinking iPhone Pro.

  17. Velv

    "Apple is preparing to unveil a new iPhone with a..."

    What's new?

  18. LoPath

    iPhone XL... the XL always makes people feel more significant.

    1. Tom 38

      XL always makes people feel more significant

      Except when it's on your t-shirt.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      GTI - gormless tw*t inside.

  19. Silver
    Thumb Up

    It'll settle the debate

    At present, if I want a iOS device with a screen greater than 4 inches then I'm out of luck.

    Similarly, if I want a Android device with a screen smaller than 4.3 inches (that isn't decidedly mid-spec) then I'm also out of luck.

    If Apple do launch a "small" and "large" size then at least we can finally work out what the market actually prefers - rather than what the market is pushed to buying, whether they like it or not.

    1. larokus

      Re: It'll settle the debate

      And yet again.

      Since you are incapable of settling the debate without ACTUAL EXPERIENCE IN THE MATTER, I will settle it.

      I am on my 9th, count it, 9th, flagship phone in 3 years, because I can, and buy what I WANT, and what has the best feature set, SoC, etc, not what anybody else tells me to buy. I'll tell you what the perfect screen size is, because I have had phones with screen sizes ranging from 3.5 inches all the way up to 5.7 inches. The perfect size for my average sized hands? (I'm 5'8") It's around 5.2 inches. Do I have the LG G2? No, I'm not a fan of the phone. I have two xperia z1 phones instead.

      For what it's worth, when apple finally gets around to that size in around 2018, you'll call it perfect and forgot this debate was going on for years, in order to justify using that almost unusable paltry pathetic little screen for so long.

    2. Bigg Phill

      Re: It'll settle the debate

      "Similarly, if I want a Android device with a screen smaller than 4.3 inches (that isn't decidedly mid-spec) then I'm also out of luck."

      Wait until next month when the Sony Xperia Z1 Compact comes out. The first "mini" premium phone that has no features downgraded - apart from the somewhat unavoidable screen size & resolution and battery capacity.

      Incidentally premium Android phones used to have screens smaller than 4.3 inches (The Z1C is almost exactly the same size as the then-premium Xperia S from 2 years ago) but they grew as that was the direction the market went. If the smaller screened phones outsold the bigger ones, the manufacturers would focus on smaller screened phones.

      ... Before anyone retorts, I'm not Sony obsessed but I have the S and was looking at upgrading to something that's pretty much the same so have had my eye on the Z1C since CES). I own/use consumer electronics from pretty much every major manufacturer including Apple.

  20. Gareth Gouldstone

    Dressing to the left

    I suppose those larger phones are carried in the front left pocket to increase the Visible Packet Lump...

  21. Joe Gurman


    When did polycarbonate become "cheap?" And why wouldn't someone want to avoid having to buy an aftermarket polycarbonate case for a phone because their life/work/play was likely to include dropping or smashing the phone from time to time? (Or just because they were a klutz?)

    So let me get this straight: Apple is evil when it only sells expensive bling, but also evil when it sells a mire durable, lower-cost product? Not like you lot are biased or anything....

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: Cheapo?

      When did polycarbonate become "cheap?"

      Er, since always? Injection moulded plastic parts are far cheaper than CNC'd aluminium parts, if you are making enough units. Moulded polycarbonate may be slightly more expensive than moulded ABS, but not by much - and we're only talking about a part that weight a few dozen grams.

      Extruded skylight roofng panels and compact discs are also made of polycarbonate.

  22. Crafty volt 7


    It's a Phablet OK! Mostly cause it's fab. Chinese gentlemans dimensions a lot lesser than UK btw...

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    One will be the same size body, bigger screen

    By eliminating the bezel, there's just enough to get to a 4.5" screen. With the same size body, those who like the current size won't be forced to stick with the 5S forever.

    The other will be larger, probably an inch larger I'd bet to keep those with phablet envy happy.

  24. Shane 4

    Just give me more storage and an extra days battery use, Couldn't give two shits wether it's iphone or android anymore or 2k,4k,8k resolution or whatever they are trying to push these days, Have had both and they are just as good as each other. 128gb on device(before sd card) would be nice for a lazy bastard like myself who doesn't like deleting their podcasts and other media just to make room!

    Ohhh and most importantly seeing as it is a phone after all how about adding a decent antenna instead of the shit from both lately, signal quality seems to be getting worse each new generation, Not sure if it's because of all the BS and bloatware installed or what but it can't be my phone company, The towers don't move!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Generally if a phone is bigger the PCB remains the same size. So as a result you can fit in a larger battery. The bigger screen may need a little more power, but on the whole you should get more battery life from a larger phone.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Are you crazy ?

      Every 8 GB memory costs about $100 from Apple (difference between 8 gb and 16 gb models). Do you want to spend another $12000 (Yes twelve thousand) on a 128 GB IShit for extra memory ?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Are you crazy ?

        £ 2.50 / GB based on the UK Site - citing the difference between the 32GB and 64Gb models,

        presumably as memory increases, the cost differential per GB decreases.

      2. dajames

        Re: Are you crazy ?

        Every 8 GB memory costs about $100 from Apple ...

        From Apple, yes. The cost to Apple is much less. They charge the customer much more than it costs them in order to make what they call a "profit".

        It would cost them very little extra (compared with the total price of an iPhone) to make 64GB rather than 16GB the standard capacity of the entry-level phone, but doing so would make it impossible for them to make massive profits on the top-end phones while keeping the low-end phones cheap enough for normal mortals.

        It would also cost them very little in manufacturing terms to provide a micro-SDXC card slot, as many -- though sadly not all -- other manufacturers do, though this woud also make it hard for them to sell large-capacity phones at inflated prices.

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Samsung owners!

    You don't need creaky plastic! Now you'll be able to see how it's done properly.

    Down-voting will only prove me right. As will up-voting.

    1. csumpi
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Samsung owners!

      So why do i see all you fanbois wrap your shiny into crappy plastic cases?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Samsung owners!

      "Samsung owners!

      You don't need creaky plastic! Now you'll be able to see how it's done properly."

      I don't use a samsung phone, but even I know you're talking bullox! Your assertion that Apple could do something right is laughable. Don't mistake huge profit from a smaller user base as success, or you would be mistaken.

      If Apple "did it right", there would be no need for constant, insignificant, incremental changes.

      Apple wonks have no right for grandeur, but always believe they have.

  26. Tim Roberts 1


    i Toss It To Samsung

  27. croc

    The proper size for a screen on your 'portable device' is based on the eye of the beholder. My eye is pretty bad, so they are ALL too small.

    1. Bigg Phill

      Yes, heaven forbid Apple might give the consumer some choice in this matter

  28. Vociferous

    The important question:

    Does it come in bling?

  29. simon gardener

    Die "Phablet" Die

    Can't we all just agree on Trannyphone and be done with it :)

    Same principle as the overlarge glasses used by cross dresser to make their hands appear smaller.

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