Fishnapper was right
"Tupac actually died" a few days after being returned. But that's OK, Mozilla got some fish back and they can now replace them. What's the half-life of a Tupac?
Suggest they get an aquarium screensaver.
Tupac lives!* Aspirant mobile phone software provider and Firefox browser-maker Mozilla nearly lost its "golden staffers" just before Christmas, when Tupac and Biggie Smalls, the two goldfish from its reception, were fishnapped. Mozilla has a cool space at its Covent Garden offices which gets lent out to friendly companies and …
Suggest they get an aquarium screensaver.
Indeed. "One day I came back home and found it floating titsup in the bowl" – that's what I heard from everyone I know who ever owned a goldfish. Never had one myself, it's too damn work for a pet that is either untouchable or dead.
I'd hardly say the fishnapper was right, since it was more likely the act of transporting them around in glasses and other conditions associated with the move that did them in. If they really thought there was a problem with the fish's accommodations, they'd have been better off discussing that with whoever was in charge.
"A Mozilla marketing source told El Reg: "Have you seen the film Taken with Liam Neeson? This whole thing played out in almost exactly the same way. What a roller-coaster." ®"
A Mozilla hitman located the missing fish on a sheik's luxury yacht (after leaving a trail of corpses halfway around the world) and blew the his brains out before rescuing them?
Bit extreme for a couple of goldfish, don't you think?
Not if they're large enough to bake.
A few months ago one of the large Koi Carp in my pond died. My Sicilian father in law was shocked that we didn't grill and eat it. There again, I shouldn't really be surprised at what he'd consider eating, having seen people in Sicily rush out when it rains to collect snails that have been brought out of hiding by the moisture. They then boil them up to make a horrible looking soup ("ghiotta di babbaluceddi" in Sicilian dialect).
Carp are a traditional if rather lacking in flavour fare for hundreds if not thousands of years. Some supermarkets have them live in the tank (though I only saw this in Foreign places). But I wouldn't eat anything that up and died on its own. I'm not a Rook*.
(*UK Rooks found to be as clever with Tools as famous Caledonian Crows. Boffins surmise that normally they don't bother showing off such technological skills due to prevalence of Road Kill and other free nosh).
Something definitely fishy.
I mean cod you believe it?
The fishnappers were probably well meaning angels, or perhaps a clown.
Of course this could be a load of pollock. Or haddock you thought of that?
*the one with the Grimsby Evening Telegraph in the pocket
**we only sing when we're fishing
You're a dab hand at these puns, so I wont carp about how bad they are.
What the article omits though, is that a snapper was on hand to take a picture of the thief. It shows him sporting a mullet hairstyle, herring-bone twill trousers with eel-asticated waist and sharks-tooth patterned sweater. He made a clean getaway on a pair of skates.
It's obvious the fishnappers did it for the Halibut. That they were angling for better treatment for the fish is simple cod-swollop. Altho I do hope they feel mahi remoras-full about the fate of the wrappers in the news. Seeing the arrow of their ways, they will be beta behaved next time.
There is a time and plaice for jokes like this.
That said, small (ish) tanks are fine and will happily support life, with the big if being how the water is looked after.
Never clean the filter sponges under tap water (take a bowl full from the tank instead) and keep the fish hungry, tiny amounts and often is preferable to a cloud of food in the tank too.
The moving stress did likely do the fella fella in however, from the Twitter pic they are (were?) ranchu goldfish which are essentially selectively bred genetic freaks. Handle with care.
"Microsoft haven't got any fish in their tank - it's so badly made that all the water seeps out of the holes."
Yep. Of course the big mistake was to convert it to an enclosure to keep Komodo Dragons in, who promptly escaped through a series of well-known but unpatched holes in the tank and proceeded to consume the previous Windows Marketing team alive.
And lo, Windows 8 was born.