back to article Alicia Keys throws in towel on BlackBerry's creative director job

She's the indecisive pop star who sung about constantly "falling in and out of love" with some bloke or other. Now the caterwauling piano player Alicia Keys has made a concrete decision, for once in her life, and has stepped down from her role as BlackBerry's global creative director. She started the role last year, when the …

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  1. Pete 2 Silver badge

    A good match

    Blackberry and Alicia Keys.

    Both are names I know. Though the only AK song I could strain to think of (maybe blokes aren't her audience?) was Black Velvet - though it turns out that was done by Alanna Myles, not AK.

    So, like Blackberry, the name is familar but the product remains a mystery. Possibly due to better marketing than content.

    I wonder whether RIM will approach Ozzy as a replacement?

    1. FrankAlphaXII

      Re: A good match

      R&B really isn't my thing, but I don't immediately wince and recoil if I hear Alicia Keys, she's pretty good.

      Except for this one song she did around 2007/2008. I forget the title of it, but while I was working a career counselor the Station commander at the MEPS I worked at had it as her ringback tone. So I'd inevitably hear it at least twice a day. And generally I was in a pretty shitty mood when I'd have to get a hold of her anyway, so it didn't help.

      That being said, If I was her I'd bail from RIMberry (or whatever they call themselves this week) myself. Noone wants to be associated with a phone manufacturer on life support.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: A good match

        Bah, it's all that fake R&B warbling crap as brought to the world thanks to Whitney Houston.

  2. Shagbag

    So Blackberry has stopped giving her a RIM-job?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      badum-tish!

    2. Ali on the Reg

      The Reg will kick itself for not thinking of that for one of its characteristic smutty headlines

  3. Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

    Return on investment?

    Anyone know what she has actually delivered in her role as /*cough*/ "global creative director" /*end cough*/

    Not a lot by the looks of it.

    1. Darryl

      Re: Return on investment?

      Well, there was that time when she tweeted from her iPhone about how much she loved using Blackberries

      1. Goldmember

        Re: Return on investment?

        "Well, there was that time when she tweeted from her iPhone about how much she loved using Blackberries"

        Yes, and then claimed she'd been hacked in an attempt to cover it up.

        And (see the same article) she was snapped in a dressing room with not 1 but 2 Apple Shineys on the table in front of her while supposedly being RIMBerry's "Global Creative Director"

        You could be forgiven for thinking her heart was never quite in it.

    2. DAN*tastik

      Re: Return on investment?

      She wasn't on the radio howling out of tune against some slow generic background music. Everyone was a winner.

  4. jai

    It is unclear whether Keys decided that the job wasn't for her, or whether the ailing Blackberry manufacturer decided they could no longer afford her.

    The NY Times article on this that I saw this morning was later updated to clarify that she was only contracted for 12 months anyway. So she's neither stepped down, nor been sacked, just neither party renewed the contract.

    That said, i was completely unaware of either the STEM or Keep Moving programs.

    Seems the only real impact her being signed to this was the flurry of free publicity it generated for the BB10 phones when she was signed, and now the flurry of negative publicity with everyone's initial reaction being "leaving a sinking ship"

  5. Fihart

    Blackberry, who that ?

    as above

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Early corners with rounding

      Them!

      "BlackBerry - which used to be known as Research In Motion"

      for people with memories not holed by entropy, also known as "Lawsuits in Motion" because "WE INVENTED EVERYTHING, in particular QWERTY KEYBOARDS FOR MICE!"

      1. Ralph B

        Re: Early corners with rounding

        > also known as "Lawsuits in Motion"

        They're still at it, it seems.

  6. Lord Lien
    Megaphone

    Black Who?

    Come in BB your time is up. Palm & Nokia have a place for you in the tech retirement home with them!

  7. Don Jefe

    Alicia Keys is a fine performer and all, but choosing her as their representative within pop-culture just shows how out of touch Blackberry were/are. It's really bad because there would have been a series of executive meetings where they sorted through various celebrities and even with two CEO's and all their attached staff nobody stood up and ask what the fuck were they thinking with Alicia Keys, she means nothing to either of their target markets.

    She doesn't represent the aggressive 'clever' business crowd and she doesn't represent the young adult crowd. Possibly there was some manner of attractiveness because she has trouble making decisions, just like Blackberry? Otherwise it's just puzzling: Like Ferragamo soccer cleats or a battery powered battery charger or a Kenny Rogers gangsta rap album. Things that just don't go together.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Trollface

      And Will.I.am sounding through the rarefied martian atmosphere.

    2. fatalXception

      Take my money

      "Kenny Rogers gangsta rap album". Please, take my money! That would be awesome...

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    BlackBerry phones are losing Keys?

    They just need someone called "TouchScreen" to take her place.

    1. Paul Hovnanian Silver badge

      "BlackBerry phones are losing Keys?"

      Came to post same joke. Modded you up instead. Left satisfied.

  9. Ivan Headache

    AK and Apple

    I may just be hallucinating, but I have a recollection of AK being one of Steve Jobs' special guests at the end of some iProduct launch.

  10. jason 7
    Facepalm

    Ermmm....

    ....didn't she get pictured at the big BB launch last year Tweeting from....her iPhone about how great BB was?

    One would have thought someone would have told her.

  11. asdf

    hahaha

    >Justin Bieber tried to bag himself a $200k RIM job - and got turned down because, according to RIM execs, “he's not going to last”.

    If I was him I would look at putting together a benefit concert for all the lower level employees finally let go when BB becomes nothing but an IP vulture capital firm owned by a handful of lawyers. Its worth it to just to teabag those brilliant prescient BB executives. Still its a tough call whose a bigger douche between him and the executives.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Encouraging women into STEM?

    "During her time at BlackBerry, Key [sic] organised a scholarship scheme to encourage women to study STEM subjects."

    This is a very laudable idea and I for one would be very pleased to see more women getting into these subjects. But I can't help wondering what the fuck Ms Keys has got to do with it, seeing as how she made bazillions of dollars in a completely different career altogether.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Angel

      Re: Encouraging women into STEM?

      "Do as I say, not as I do!"

  13. Smoking Man

    Remake of one of her songs?

    "This girl just got fired!"..

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: Remake of one of her songs?

      Finally an economically realistic song on endless loop in the bus.

  14. Gil Grissum

    Big surprise? I doubt Ms. Keys would have jumped ship if it wasn't sinking. She probably doesn't want to be associated with the brand now, especially considering that Blackberry has left the consumer market. From the list of things she did mentioned in this article, it doesn't sound like she did much for Blackberry. Of course, her tweeting about the role from an iPhone, probably wasn't the best idea.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    crackberry?

    I've definitely only ever referred to them as cackberry...

  16. adnim
    Meh

    I would be surprised

    and what's more disappointed if anyone cared.

  17. Crisp

    Alicia Keys as creative director?

    I can't imagine anything more demotivating for the poor sods at Blackberry that actually do the work.

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