back to article SCADA flaws put world leaders at risk of TERRIBLE TRAFFIC JAM

In November 2014, leaders of the G20 group of nations will convene in Brisbane, Australia, for a few days of plotting to form a one-world government high-level talks aimed at ensuring global stability and amity. Queensland, the Australian state in which Brisbane is located, is leaving no preparatory stone unturned as it …

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  1. Sealand
    Go

    Security issues

    I understand why you can't carry reptiles or fly kites while the leaders amass.

    Banning laser pointers is going to cripple their PowerPoint presentations, though ...

    1. Tom 13

      Re: Security issues

      Silly rabbit! Those laws are for the little people, not the world leaders.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    > illegal to carry a reptile

    But ... but ... but ... thanks to the tireless Mr Icke we know that the world leaders ARE reptiles: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Icke#Reptoid_hypothesis

    So does this mean I'm banned from picking up David Cameron and carrying him around like an unusually moist crocodile handbag? If so then (checks calendar) I guess I can do it some other week, unless someone else already has him booked?

    1. M7S

      Re: > illegal to carry a reptile - Futile effort

      This will be to Godzilla as the "Keep of the grass" signs would be to a squadron of Challenger Tanks.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: > illegal to carry a reptile - Futile effort

        According to an Aussie friend, they probably mean "...shake a snake"

  3. Robin

    The Australian Job?

    Hang on a minute lads, I've got a great idea...

    1. Captain Scarlet
      Thumb Up

      Re: The Australian Job?

      Instead of Mini get some Yutes (I think they are called)

      1. lglethal Silver badge
        Joke

        Re: The Australian Job?

        Not Yutes, Utes. A Yute is a fibre used to make Hessian bags (according to Wikipedia), whilst a Ute is the traditional mode of transport for the Australian Yobbo.

        1. Captain Scarlet

          Re: The Australian Job?

          Thumbs up for correcting something I could have just Googled

          But Mr Stewart from Home and Away is not a Yobbo!

    2. John Brown (no body) Silver badge
      Facepalm

      Re: The Australian Job?

      ...was thinking along the same lines, but wondering why no one has learned about traffic control system security from that 44 year old documentary :-)

  4. codeusirae
    Terminator

    The death penalty ..

    Bring in the death penalty for hacking SCADA kit with USB keys.

    1. You have not yet created a handle
      Holmes

      Re: The death penalty ..

      Surely you mean the death penalty for those who designed and implemented a SCADA system that allowed USB devices to be connected?

  5. John Smith 19 Gold badge
    Thumb Up

    Wow. A governement that tries to find out vulnerabilites *before* it gets hacked.

    Thumbs up for shear novelty

    Now, lets see what the other operators (and the mfgs) do about it.

  6. Lamont Cranston

    So, hacking the traffic lights is out.

    How about taking control of the airport?

  7. Alan Brown Silver badge

    SCATS games?

    Surely that kind of material belongs in a grumblemag?

  8. Old Handle
    Coat

    Damn, there goes my laser powered lizard kite project.

  9. Brian Cockburn
    Big Brother

    Move 'em to an island

    I think that the G20 (and the G8 and whatever) need to make themselves a purpose built venue on an island with no one else there. This way the costs will be reduced because of:

    Venue re-usability

    No possibility of protests because only the attendees and their entourages (press & lackies) will be there

    No 'security audits' for the host city / nation

    Security is way easier

  10. Captain DaFt

    They're doomed!

    DOOOOMED, I tell ya!

    Nowhere did I see anything banning pointy sticks!

    MPs vs. MPFC, now there's a battle for the ages!

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