back to article Vulture 2 paintjob: Kim Jong-un battles flag-waving Brits

It's hats off to all those Low Orbit Helium Assisted Navigator (LOHAN) fans who took time to present proposed liveries for our Vulture 2 spaceplane. Following a first round of submissions, we asked stragglers to get their act together, and behold they did verily deploy the crayons. Here are the last suggestions, and for your …

COMMENTS

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  1. Shades

    To be honest...

    ...I'm not interested in any paint job than Adrianes :D

    "...although it's not highly practical [...] we might have considered water transfer printing, although it's anyone's guess how much a custom transfer would cost."
    Err, don't be silly. Break out the Crayola and replicate it!
    "with a couple of you opting to ditch the white"
    You do realise that there is white in the middle one don't you Lester?

    1. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

      Re: To be honest...

      Yes, so there are three, with a couple without white...

      1. Shades
        Pint

        Re: To be honest...

        Yeah, someone else, below, pointed this out to me also. :D

      2. Evil Auditor Silver badge
        Coat

        Re: To be honest...

        Lester, I have to somewhat agree with Shades. "with a couple of you" as it is written here has rather the meaning of an indefinite small number. This can, of course, also mean two but in the context of showing three versions thereafter it most likely doesn't.

        Although you can consider the two who went for a red/black scheme together and call them couple I think it would be more appropriate to write ...with two of you opting to ditch the white.

        Mine's the one with the Guide to Completely Superfluous Comments in its pocket.

        1. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

          Re: Re: To be honest...

          There's only one way this conversation can go, and that's directly to the nearest pub. I invite you to join me, but leave the Superfluous Comments guide at home.

          1. Evil Auditor Silver badge

            Re: To be honest...

            Wise words by a wise man. Call it pub'o'clock!

  2. Ralph B

    Meh.

    The spaceplan is a 3D object, with greatly varying contours between body and wings. Therefore it is unfortunate that El Reg presented a simple profile for paintjob suggestions. Unsurprisingly then almost none of the submissions will work well on the real thing. Might as well let Adriane have a go with a few spray cans of hi-vis tints.

    Have the Vulture 2 team considered adding a few blinking LEDs at key locations? That might work as well or better than a garish paintjob.

  3. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge
    Headmaster

    You do realise that there is white in the middle one don't you Lester?

    "couple" means two. Of those three, a couple had no white, seems OK to me.

    1. Shades
      Pint

      While I admit you are technically right (the best kind of right!) it just seems an awkward way to show designs without white, but maintaining the three-in-a-row layout. Perhaps the two designs without white should have been next to each other?

      Is it Friday yet? :D

      1. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

        We've just got to hang in there for one more day...

  4. Lottie

    If not Adrianes, then...

    Something inspired by the kiddies painting would work well.

    Are you saying that the one with multiple repeated photos is mre practical?

  5. Captain Hogwash
    Headmaster

    Re: "Adrianes", "Adriane"

    Ariadne! Her name is Ariadne. It's easy to remember because she is associated with this thread. Follow it and find your way out of this labyrinth of incorrect names. I've already disposed of the bull.

    1. Shades

      Re: "Adrianes", "Adriane"

      Oops, my bad. Sorry Ariadne :( But at least I wasn't the only one :)

  6. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
    Happy

    Different colours on different surfaces...

    In that case, your solution is easy. On the upper surface, you have a Union Jack design. To show the plane is the right way up, and all is tickety-boo.

    On the underside, to indicate the plane is upside-down, you should have an Australian flag. For our colonial cousins who steal sheep and shove jumbucks into their tucker-bags, all while standing on their heads...

    1. Tom7

      Re: Different colours on different surfaces...

      Since you'll be seeing it from the bottom, surely the Union flag should go on the bottom to indicate it's the right way up and the Federation star on the top, to show it's upside down?

    2. Martin Budden Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Different colours on different surfaces...

      To avoid confusion show the entire Union Jack on the upper side and just the canton of the Australian flag on the lower side. And call it Bruce.

  7. Smallbrainfield

    Magenta cock-alike for the win!

    Just imagine it throbbing on the launch pad, before thrusting for the sky and finally, flopping back down to earth, it's payload spent.

    1. Martin Budden Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: Magenta cock-alike for the win!

      I did submit a magenta cock-and-balls design! For some reason* L.H. has chosen to omit it from the competition. I even made the rest of the plane sky-blue just to make the cock-and-balls stick out more. It was a truly magnificent design, I tell you.

      *maybe he felt it was a bit too in-your-face and hard-to-swallow.

  8. Ben Bonsall

    Don't use pink- Spitfires that were used as spy planes were painted pink as it blends in with clouds better than anything else. Admittedly, it does make it stand out against the ground.

  9. Arachnoid

    Chrome.........

    Go for all Chrome it will then display all of natures colours and turn into a mean clean stealth machine.

  10. rurwin
    Flame

    PINK!? PINK!?

    That is not pink. That is Magenta.

    Those are two totally different colours.

    1. Richard 120
      Headmaster

      Re: PINK!? PINK!?

      Agreed, magenta is #FF00FF, that's the colour there.

      Pink, I'd say is #FFCCCC.

      (Not a grammar nazi, a colour nazi)

  11. Pypes

    Id be happy to run off Ariadne's design in vehicle wrapping vinyl. If you posted dimensions I could give you an approximate idea of the weight.

    1. Shades

      What a fantastic offer. If I could send you a pint I would.

      Come on El Reg, you know it makes sense! Sod the competition. You never know, contributing to Vulture 2 might just inspire her to follow a career in something amazing!

    2. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

      Here you go, a quick sketch: http://regmedia.co.uk/2013/10/24/ariadne_vulture_2_dimensions.jpg

      Bear in mind the aircraft is divided into bits, with a bayonet joint between the nose and rear fuselage/wing assemblies

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

      2. Pypes

        Sorry, balls up my maths a bit with the last post, so I'll walk through this one

        Raw mass per unit area gives me 32g per side. (0.299 sq m x 0.0107 g / sq cm) this is with the ink on it.

        Add say 25% for non - flatness will give you 40g.

        This is without laminate which would probably add 50%, but make the thing easier to apply.

        I would need better dimensions and a higher rez version of the artwork if we were to go ahead.

    3. Splodger

      Just wondering...

      The vinyl's a nice offer to be sure, but will there need to be another SPB testing phase to make sure that the vinyl doesn't seperate/de-laminate/go a bit curly at extreme velocity/altitude/temperature?

      Will it stick to slightly roughly-hewn (albeit sanded) nylon OK?

      Have you considered just using something like Dylon to just dye the plastic?

      Finally, do we have an estimated mission date yet?

      1. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

        Re: Just wondering...

        Yes. Dunno. No. No.

      2. Pypes

        Re: Just wondering...

        Internet ate my post.

        People use this stuff on light aircraft so I don't think de-lamination will be an issue.

  12. Paul Westerman
    Thumb Up

    Ariadne FTW!

    please

  13. Arachnoid

    How about

    Dazzle camouflage as used during WW2?

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge

      Re: How about

      The Japanese had a nice line on this, in pink and orange. On some of their factories, the idea being to confuse bomb-aimers. Given how poor aerial accuracy was from height back then, I'm sure it was a waste of paint. Quite striking though.

  14. Ketlan
    Happy

    There is no choice...

    It's not a difficult decision at all - it HAS to be Ariadne's design! Come on, Reg, you can do it.

  15. magickmark
    Thumb Up

    Ariadne Ariadne Ariadne

    It has to be Ariadne's design, talk to Pypes it seems he can provide the needed covering.

    Come on El Reg do the right thing!!

    1. Marvin the Martian

      Re: Ariadne Ariadne Ariadne

      Reluctantly my vote goes there too.

      I'd been trying to coach my 3y old this morning to come with a competing design, but sadly his "pirates" period of last month is over, now it's all "steam locs" 24/7 -- wholly inappropriate here.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    SOmeone with art skills should do a dazzle camo pattern

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Ariadne

    Ariadne every time. Anything else is just pedestrian.

  18. Peter Simpson 1

    Ariadne!

    Even the US wants Ariadne's design!

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Stockman's Vulture Markings are a good one.

    But where is the 'Ministry of Space' styled effort?

  20. Neil 30

    British Racing Green

    I thank you.

  21. Eugene Crosser
    Thumb Up

    +1 David Stockman's

    because it is:

    - reminiscent of a bikini

    - is red+white+blue as Union Jack

    - has the Vulture logo (and in the right place too!)

  22. Eugene Crosser

    On a second thought,

    forget bikini.

    Bring Ariadne to Spain for a quick holiday, and let her do the job herself!

  23. John Gamble

    Symmetry is Boring

    Obviously an asymmetric design needs to be the choice. So that gives us the ones by Dirk Duckhorn, Gareth Jenkins, and ... Ariadne.

    (Nit pickers will mention the ones by Adrian Lynch and Marten Erdelen, I consider those to be symmetries of a different sort.)

    Obviously this means that combined with the groundswell of opinion offered by your other posters, Adriane is the clear front-runner.

  24. Martin Budden Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    James Windmill

    My vote goes to the design by James Windmill. It is the closest to this classic which I have always loved.

  25. The Dude
    Devil

    I do not understand why my submission does not appear. It was brilliant, and bloody hilarious!

    Obscene perhaps... but nevermind that.

  26. Roger Stenning
    Pint

    What...

    ...no Black Vulture with Low Observability beak markings?

    For shame!

    *snerk*

  27. Zot
    Thumb Up

    My favourite is

    Is the one on the right. Very nice, Martin Erdelen:-

    http://regmedia.co.uk/2013/10/21/vulture_paintjob_montage_rwb_big.jpg

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