back to article Free Cocaine giveaway from Russian search engine Yandex

Russia's leading search engine, Yandex, has launched a platform-as-a-service (PaaS) offering named “Cocaine”. Yandex is easily understood as the Russian equivalent of Google and not only because it dominates search in its home nation. The company's expanding product portfolio mirrors Google's with flattering precision, to the …

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  1. Sir Barry

    SNORT!!

    1. Great Bu
      Joke

      White lines ?

      "No officer, it's not a bag of illegal drugs, it's an open-source PaaS system for creating custom cloud hosting apps that are similar to Google App Engine or Heroku."..........

      "Just put your hands behind your back and face the wall, sir."

  2. Khaptain Silver badge

    What's in a name

    Cocaine : Cloud based containerised software services.

    Speed : Multi I7 processors in a home box actually capable of providing sufficient oomph in order to run crisis at full res.

    Heroin : An almost instantly rush of pure heaven, a 4Tb SSD disked mobile smartphone with a symetrical 2 GB connexion tapping directly into a prioritised TPB/Porn/<insert personal userbase of data.

    LSD : A direct to the brain connected personal Augmented Reality device capable of digitally removing woemns cloths whilst replacing any unfit bodies with that of Paris Hilton or Monia Belucci according to your current emotional state. The bodies then start to transmogrify into alien lifeforms which have only one task, satisfying your personal needs....

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "containerisation, an interesting alternative to virtualisation that enables applications to run in a discrete environment that behaves an awful lot like a virtual machine but can see several apps share a single operating system kernel. Containerisation is making waves at present, having recently won support from Red Hat."

    At present? Microsoft have offered that for about 7 years via App-V and Softgrid and pretty much own that market space...

    1. Tom 38 Silver badge

      At present? Microsoft have offered that for about 7 years via App-V and Softgrid and pretty much own that market space...

      Well, MS own the "MS hosted containerisation" market, for sure.

      PS: Solaris Zones are 9 years old, BSD jails are 13 years old..

    2. John G Imrie

      containerisation

      Just how old is chroot?

  4. Homer 1
    Joke

    So Dilbert, what do you do for a living?

    I develop Racket programs, mostly on Cocaine.

    Oh, and sometimes I write software too.

  5. b166er

    Is Cocaine available on a mirrored blade?

  6. Chris_J
    Joke

    Targeted marketing

    I guess they are targeting financial service companies and trading platforms...

  7. Dave Pickles

    Obviously JJ Cale fans

    It don't lie, it don't lie, it don't lie...

    Cocaine.

    1. asdf

      Or Robin Williams fans

      Cocaine is God's way of telling you you make too much damn money.

  8. Anonymous C0ward
    Pirate

    I know where I'm hosting the next Silk Road.

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