back to article Dead Steve Jobs' Apple donut SPACESHIP HQ gets permission to land

Apple's new spaceship-shaped headquarters has been given the go-ahead by Cupertino City Council. The fruity firm was granted permission to build the mammoth 2.8 million square foot Apple Campus 2 at a council meeting on Tuesday night. Apart from some gripes about traffic, locals raised few major concerns about the gigantic eco …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    One Ring to Rule Them (and in the darkness bind them)

    Interesting building design but in a state that gets as much sunshine as California, the circular design is going to be difficult to air condition. Sunlight will be direct no matter what time of day or year. The design means that all the building materials will have to be custom manufactured. Piping, Ductwork, structural steel, glass, furniture, etc almost NOTHING will be simple or off the shelf.

    I hope the building contract has alot of allowances.

    1. frank ly

      Re: One Ring to Rule Them (and in the darkness bind them)

      I've had a very close look at the plans and designs for this building. If you zoom in really close, you'll see that everything is made from of millions of small cubes, all of idential size and form factor. It's pure genius! It means that everything can be mass produced with slight tweaks and configuration at the on-site assembly stage. Spare parts stocking will be simplified because of that too.

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

      2. Me19713

        Re: One Ring to Rule Them (and in the darkness bind them)

        > ... miilions of small cubes ...

        Undoubtedly, the corpses of all of those little Next machines he never sold.

    2. Jolyon Smith

      Re: One Ring to Rule Them (and in the darkness bind them)

      A building that size creates it's own shelf.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: One Ring to Rule Them (and in the darkness bind them)

      "The design means that all the building materials will have to be custom manufactured. Piping, Ductwork, structural steel, glass, furniture, etc almost NOTHING will be simple or off the shelf."

      Just like Apple's power supplies, chargers, connectors, cables, etc.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: One Ring to Rule Them (and in the darkness bind them)

      Well, it is in NorCal though and the average temp in the hottest months of the year is 82 degrees.

  2. andreas koch
    Devil

    > . . .

    "Don't bite the hand that feeds you," resident Carol Baker told the council at a public meeting before the vote.

    "If we don't honor Apple with this building, they'll leave. There's no reason for them to stay here and be loyal to a community that doesn't support them. But if they left, it would be a disaster for the city."

    . . . <

    What a <airquote including actual caramelldansen-style curtsy>reasonable</airquote including actual caramelldansen-style curtsy> attitude.

    Next step: If we don't honor Apple with new roads, they'll leave. That'd be bad.

    Next step: If we don't honor Apple with free services, they'll leave. That'd be bad.

    Next step: If we don't honor Apple with newborn babies for their canteen, they'll leave. That'd be bad.

    Coughcough. Religion kicking in.

    1. JDX Gold badge

      No, this is the reality whenever a town depends on a single company for jobs. Happens all the time.

      1. Euripides Pants
        Coat

        Re: depends on a single company for jobs

        I don't think Cupertino depends on Apple for Jobs anymore....

      2. TechBearMike

        Coming from a smaller, indigent state (Louisiana) I completely understand the City Council's action and attitude. In Louisiana, state and local governments routinely prostrate themselves in the name of attracting businesses, especially large companies. Unfortunately, in Louisiana it usually ends up that they "give away the store" to get the store; it ends up costing government/taxpayers far more than the business gives back in taxes, fees, goodwill and physical presence.

        The small town I used to live in made all kinds of concessions to attract a horse racing track and casino after it was outlawed in the parish (county) just to the south. Net result: some revenues, I suppose, but a marked increase in use of law enforcement to intervene with out-of-control patrons. I saw a huge increase in the number of patients involved in MVAs, slips and falls or passing out in the casino; I worked in the local Emergency Department. The track was a magnet for undesirables and compulsive gamblers. (Good for horse owners and jockeys, though!)

        And the city I lived in (and the parish government) offered so many incentives to get WalMart to build a distribution center just north of the city, complete with road improvements, infrastructure buildout, etc. There were droves of unemployed people lined up to try to get work. And the parish and city coffers, while not overflowing, are definitely deriving the benefit. The distribution center, however, disrupted an undocumented Native burial site (protest was immediately quashed) and the truck traffic to and from the center had an immediately noticeable, detrimental effect on the nearby Interstate highway and other local 4-lane roads.

        I would think the Apple HQ construction itself will bring mega-dollars to Cupertino (all those construction people have to eat, live somewhere, shop, etc.), definitely benefiting the local economy in the short term. And at least Cupertino will have an architectural icon associated with their city and a company presence that should last a very long time, complete with economic benefits.

        I can't fault Cupertino's interests at all in this situation. It's a huge win for them.

  3. Nate Amsden

    where do you park?

    I looked at a bunch of the images but do not see parking anywhere, is it underground? do you have to walk a half mile from a parking lot to get to the building? ~12k employees probably has at least 2-3 thousand cars.

    I walk to work myself(0.9 miles) but I've only worked at two companies where I lived close enough to do that, others were at least 10 miles away.

    That being said, it's almost 11:30 I should probably start thinking about walking in.

    1. Don Jefe
      Joke

      Re: where do you park?

      You don't need parking. As a proper Apple employee you are completely satisfied staying inside the office. It is perfect in there.

    2. ZilWerks

      Re: where do you park?

      While in software, I do work with CalTrans, California's transportation people. 12K people would normally require 9K parking spots and 750 for visitors, unless a light rail/trolley is involved, and the local trolley/light rail/subway (BART) doe not go that far south. Doubtless the architects got caught up in how their custom glass looks, and the forest, and the engineers were ordered to implement their vision, so little details like parking get overlooked. Future office drones working there better hope that parking is the least of the problems, compared to plumbing, fire safety, and electrical grid management.

    3. TechBearMike

      Re: where do you park?

      I'll go for underground parking with elaborate elevators/stairs/escalators and people movers (think airport) to get employees in and out in rapid, elegant fashion.

    4. JetSetJim Silver badge

      Re: where do you park?

      There will be underground parking for a large swathe of senior cultists, and nearby surface parking for the multitude of lowly acolytes, apparently. There's a link to a Jobs PPT (in PDF) here that shows the offsite parking. I think you have to get at the proper building plans to see the underground parking (I've seen them, but can't find them again, this PDF refers to 2,300 basement parking spots, but with no pics)

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Always going round in circles and never innovating. Apt.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    In Xanadu did Kublai Khan....

    History points to the building of giant palaces as a sure sign of coming overthrow.

    Apple has taken it's eye of the ball, and is worrying about the beauty of its image rather than the reality. Look at the iPhone 5C debacle. A major roll-out is stillborn. Certainly, the 5S is doing well, but 5C is a huge miscalculation on the part of Apple.

    Is Apple losing it under Cook?

    1. Schultz Silver badge

      "building of giant palaces as a sure sign of coming overthrow"

      Building big stuff sounds like a reasonable thing to do before you organization perishes. Think about the pyramids, Acropolis, Circus Maximus, Lichtenstein castle, ... we remember the builders even though their organization perished long ago. Economic success is temporary, but a good building will last for a while. Using a lot of glass in the spaceship may undercut the argument a bit though.

    2. MushThom

      Re: In Xanadu did Kublai Khan....

      Hi, neighbors. With the stall of the new iteration of the iPhone - essentially, more of the same - I wonder about Apple's future. We video producer/editors got completely shafted with Final Cut Pro X after we loyally supported Apple for a decade of development. They no longer have anything new or paradigm-shifting, just more consumer bullshit. Not even a computer company anymore. It is over for Apple and not simply because Jobs died. Just liker Microsoft in the early 2000's (and today). Innovate or die. A big circular building? Who gives a fu*k?

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's revolutionary

    No it isn't. None of it turns.

    1. Marketing Hack Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: It's revolutionary

      It's Apple, so the building stays still and the world revolves around it :)

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "We've designed it with the same care and attention to detail as we do with all Apple products."

    Meaning it will be grossly overpriced and incompatible with current staff or equipment.

  8. ZilWerks

    IMHO the construction of a monumental building for any company is a sign that company is past its innovative phase and into its decay. Too whit: Sears Tower, Chicago; John Hancock Insurance building, New York City; Seagrams Building, New York City; etc. Companies pushing productivity and innovation rent offices and invest in other things.

    1. MushThom

      Totally agree: momentum lost, never to be regained.

  9. Mr Young
    Coffee/keyboard

    Even Apple needs planning permission?

    That's MY small concrete bunker fucked then...

  10. Ivan Headache

    2.8 million square foot?

    Shirley that should be 2.8 million round foot.

    1. sebacoustic

      Re: 2.8 million square foot?

      Shurely 2.8million * 4/pi = 3.56e6 round foot

    2. markw:

      Re: 2.8 million square foot?

      2.8 million square feet with rounded corners...

  11. Homer 1
    Terminator

    Cult builds spaceship

    All they need now is the Kool-Aid.

  12. codeusirae
    Facepalm

    Wah gwaan rhaatid bubu?

    "The scheme was one of Steve Jobs' pet projects and he appeared in person at a session with politicians to big up the scheme."

    Wah gwaan mek yuh gwaany come een like a Jamaican gyangsta, cease & sekkle now ..

  13. Lars Silver badge

    Hello El Reg

    I think we know he is dead by now.

    1. Graphsboy

      Re: Hello El Reg

      Couldn't agree more. I get that The Reg and a large portion of it's readers have no time for Jobs but do you have to keep using this 'dead' thing whenever you refer to him in headlines? It just makes it sound like you're revelling in the death of a bloke who passed away due to cancer. Distasteful, unfunny and it does you no credit.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    We need to know

    Will it include a spooky underground crypt for the man himself?

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Uh....

    ...they're like, building Steve Jobs' ring. Uh... huh huhuhuh.

    Heh. Yeah. Heh heh heh.

  16. Paul Westerman
    Go

    At last

    The B-Ark is being built!

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