BOFH: Welcome to Helldesk, ma'am, may I take your bags? "You're looking stressed!" the PFY says to the Boss, who's behaving more irrationally than usual. "What?" the Boss responds. "Stressed," the PFY says. "You. Look. Stressed." "Oh. Yes," the Boss says, looking around in a semi-dazed manner. "Have a stack of Service Desk Candidate's CVs to look through." "What for?" "For …
Francis, how true!
It's been yonks since I was in helldesk, I guess some of you commentards weren't even born then. But I do remember that I responded more quickly to cute girls' problems and spent more time solving it than with others. How bad a person does that make me?
Almost certainly there was always enough to do. But back in those pre-ticketing system and pre-KPI days issues tended to go away if left to themselves. Not all, of course, but quite a few. So it didn't matter that much how much time I spent with the cute girls.
But, at least, one of them, the very busty one, was really terribly stupid. I remember well when she phoned to tell me that she couldn't print out anymore. Instead of my usual (non-cute girl) response on the phone on checking power, etc. I went to see her, erm the printer. First check, green light was on. Second check, open the tray only to find it being empty...
There where, of course, many other users' stupidities and I'm sure other commentards could add lots of them, too. (Using the mouse on the screen, anyone else?) But she was the only one I know who got fired for being too stupid to do her job as secretary. And S., in case you read this and recognise - nah, that won't happen.
It's a general rule that helpdesk service will favor those who bring the IT department gifts of food. .... AC Posted Friday 4th October 2013 10:25 GMT
And free rides are also sweet and sticky treats which are bliss and hard to resist and deny oneself ..... and especially so when conservatively accompanied in tandem and supportive of the PFY's concluding remark. ...."He said something about the one with the biggest tits!"
Not too high a profile allows for a not too short and frantic time for pleasures.
I, too, spent many years on the helpdesk for a product our team was producing. And, yes, the cute [1] gals always got preferential treatment. Sadly, though, 99 percent of the help candidates were remote, sometimes on the far side of the planet, so my chances for mischief were significantly reduced. Still, a pleasant voice went a long way towards getting better service.
[1] Where the definition of cute depends upon local standards (e.g., Rubenesque!).
So that's my CV rendered worthless, then.
A certain company in the Aberdeen area, which shall remain nameless but it's initials were Racal Survey, used to insist on photos with CVs. Rumour was they wanted to silently avoid anyone with a non-reflective cast to their skin.
I had my picture taken in a Ginger wig with pigtails and painted freckles on.
I got the job.
This one had me laughing, but the PFY scuttling the Boss at the end seems like that was more open malice than anything. This particular Boss hadn't done anything to actively attempt to sabotage, blackmail, or harass the Bastard and the PFY, nor was he being a colossal idiot to same effect.
Seems like he just torpedoed the Boss simply because he could, rather than for any practical reason.
I seem to recall the PFY scuppering a boss he actually liked once, it's a reflex that you can't turn off apparently. His comment seemed spontaneous enough that this seems to track at least, he always has had a tendency to open his mouth before thinking.
This made my day, both the PFY's torpedoing the boss and his death star comment in particular but overall excellent.
Ha, Last week I had one ask me how to use the foot peddle. I went to check what she was doing, and she had her shoe off and was trying to use the mouse on the floor with her foot. I groaned, went got a new mouse, and nicely told her how to use it.
And she was only 21.
like the woman who turned up with hair styled and a long sleeve dress for the interview, and then on the first day rocked up in Dr Maartens and short sleeves to show off her tattoos,
Or the vacuous brunette with the degree in psychology and a bad case of being a sociopath,
Or the asian woman who refused to do the same task twice, because she "knew it now" and wanted to be promoted to Sysadmin inside 4 weeks.
Yep, seen em all.
In recent times I have had to reset the same person's password 3 times in one day because they forgot the new password they created twice in 3 hours, and spent 15 minutes trying to help someone reset their password until I discovered they were spelling their own name wrong. There's 6 of us, and 10,000 of these **insert creative expletive here**
Undies and power saws don't even begin to describe it!
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