Were they auditioning for the film version of Fifty Sheds of Grey?
Mine's the one covered in sawdust.
An amorous South Carolina couple copped a cuffing last Wednesday while allegedly making the beast with two backs inside a Home Depot display shed. According to the Smoking Gun, cops were called to the DIY chain's North Charleston branch shortly after 8.30am "in reference to a male and female entering a display shed on the …
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Indeed yes. I remember a couple of years ago a Bahraini (?) couple got arrested for having sex in their car ... but they were acquitted because the car had tinted windows, therefore they weren't in public.
Though, it is a bit ironic when US law trumps islamic law for prudery.
@frank ly: "Indeed. I'd claim 'reasonable expectaton of privacy'."
There is no reasonable expectation of privacy in a public place - they were in a shed on display at a retailer for crying out loud! In a shed on their property - fine, but not one in a public place.
That said, the rap is a bit much from my perspective - had someone opened the door to the shed and seen them going at it, *then* called the cops, it would be different. As it was, no member of the public saw his "indecent exposure".
Bowden will face similarly face a disorderly conduct charge, as well as an "indecent exposure ... for having his genitals on public view" rap.
They were hardly public while he was in a shed. And for all we know, they weer considering buying it, and just taking it for a test run.
"Technically he was inside Emily inside a shed"
If memory serves correctly, a half wave rectified sinusoidal wave of about 1.2Hz (frequency increasing slightly over time) would describe a typical shed-based technique. Assuming the ground reference (i.e. Emily) was fixed rather than floating, he'd only be inside her half the time.
Paris, cos she must have...
His genitals were hardly on public view, were they. He was inside a damn shed.
That doesn't stop US police. Lived in "silicon valley" for a few years in the 90s and remember reading a local newspaper article of someone who needed a pee so tried to do so discretely against a wall of a building ... two police officers spotted him and ordered him to turn around - needless to say he did (if you don't then police have a tendency to shoot) and as one of the offices was female he got done for exposing himself to a woman and was put on sex offenders register
The shop should charge hotel room rates (by the hour, of course...).
On a separate point, I bet it wasn't one of the cheaper sheds, otherwise they would have been lucky if the damn thing hadn't collapsed around them (in which case the guy's one-eyed bishop would've been truly exposed).
You are right, it's shocking. The title was completely misleading. It seemed to imply something about networks or VPN, and then all of a sudden, we click on the link and see this. In the middle of a working day. At work. Arrest the REG for misleading and indecent articulation! (is that the correct wording? I need to check with my superior officers)
Dear Mr. Cowshed:
The same thing happens often to me. Every time I read titles like the article heading -E.G. "Hot L*ian Action", "F*kotronic Man" and "The Bald Chair Th*ing Gorilla"- I think they're written in Networking lingo and/or making reference to big IT companies. And it's not only in the Internets! Video rentals also use this nasty trick! It's really shameful !
According to my research, we began with:
A couple cuffed for shagging in a park in front of 22 coppers. They were aesthetically challenged too. They were charged with indecent public exposure.
Now we have a couple cuffed for doing the beast with two backs in a shed in a DIY store. They have been charged with indecent public exposure.
If the trend continues, may we see:
1. Couple cuffed for doing the beast with two backs in a ROOM at a MOTEL. Forgot to lock room and were apprehended by maid who entered the room by accident. Charged with indecent public exposure and deliberately causing mental anguish to the maid, who fainted and had to be treated at the scene by the coppers.
1b Couple cuffed in same situation as above, but behind locked door. Maid passing by overhears "suspicious activity", reports it to the manager who immediately calls the police. Suspecting terrorism, police break down the door. The couple are charged with indecent public exposure, criminal damage and wasting police time.
2. Couple cuffed for doing the beast with two backs in their apartment. Forget to close the window and are overheard by a passer-by in the street. Fearing that a serious crime against the state is under way, the passer-by calls the cops who in turn call the National Guard for help and lay siege to the apartment. To keep a long story short, the couple are charged with indecent public exposure, criminal damage, demolition without a permit, wasting public funds, causing psychological trauma to the passer-by and injury to a police officer (who shoots himself in the foot by accident during the siege, but it's still their fault he was there in the first place).
3. Couple cuffed in the street outside M&S or Wallmart or whatever for being in possession of underwear with intent to commit an act of gross indecency.
4. Couple cuffed, just because copper <insert name> feared they might eventually commit an act of public or private indecency.
5. All couples are to be cuffed pre-emptively to avoid indecent behaviour, by order of the Police Commissioner.
If it makes you feel any better, the call originated from a digital mobile device, was routed through the E-911 switches and sent to the nearest emergency dispatch center. When the cop responded and arrested he reported in using an encrypted radio with his vehicle location captured by GPS on the trip to the booking center/jail. While at the jail the suspects would have been fingerprinted using a scanner and had their identities checked and a warrant and priors search done using an SSL Internet connection simultaneously searching city, county, state, federal and INTERPOL databases. With their current arrest being appended to their permanent record and merged with the electronic report the cop populated on his notebook. After that the suspects would have been issued inmate ID's and ID bracelets with the unique ID being generated by adding +1 to the last ID in the system.
It is in bootnotes i.e miscellanea and trivia.
But to assuage your quest for a monotheistic website where I.T. is god one can interpret it within an I.T. framework.
A couple thought that they had sufficient cover until they found that their I.T. strategy was flawed and their backup strategy failed in a spectacular manner. The company involved suspected crackers and had the couple arrested.. The man was charged with assault with a blunt weapon and the lady was charged with receiving swollen goods and concealing 12 ounces of crack in her gusset.
A spokesman from the department of Homeland security stated that the world is now a safer place and that the couple were suspected terrorist on a deep penetration mission.
The shed was unharmed.
what a fantastic news story, you must've really pulled out all the stops and put your most IT savvy writer on it to get this amazing IT scoop !
ok, sarcasm aside, is this aimed at your junior readers ? The completely irrelevant story of two peeps who got caught shagging somewhere inappropriate, yawn,.. maybe you mistook tabloid for tablet :)
mine's the one with the built in portable computer , media center, invisibility cloak, and time machine built into the breast pocket
Is it me or is this a bit harsh for them trying to have a quick shag in a display shed? Police involvement and their identities splashed around the world. Basically, any time someone (employer, prospective partner, whoever), types their name in, this is going to be the first result. Not to mention that in the USA, you get put on the sex offenders register for things like this!
Why couldn't a member of staff just knock on the door and say: "oi! knock it off!" and give them a telling off. Make them wipe the place down as well if it needs it. The rest is a bit excessive.
Indeed. They weren't hutting anyone, or causing any bothy. So I would lean-to the side of doing nothing. After all, people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, and a criminal record is hard to shed. Whereas now they're in the doghouse, all because they got over-excited with a wood erection.
Hmmmm. Smiley face or coat? On balance I think the bad puns have it... Byeeee.
Indecent exposure? I'm wondering if that will stick, if he was not actually exposing himself to anyone until they popped the door open. But anyway... *shrug*.
The potentially bad part for them, Megan's Law is quite overzealous, so they may find (in common with people that got caught taking a pee on a tree while drunk and actual pedophiles) that they are excluded from living within 1000 feet of schools, and.. .well, I don't know what else, but rather than excluding some areas, in a typical city everything is excluded but a city block or two (if that.)
A quick naughty while out and about might spice up a couple's sex life, but if they had been at it long enough for employees to wink, nod and call the cops and then the 15 or 20 minutes it would take for the coppers to get around to driving to the store.... good grief, that's no longer a quick shag, that's the full monty and no joke.
This is outrageous! What the heck were they thinking? Plastic sheds?!?!
No, seriously. I read the whole article, then saw the links to the plastic and wooden sheds and just couldn't help wondering where the steel ones were. Are Aussie the only ones that bother building proper sheds?
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