back to article Applicants sought for one-way trip to Martian Big Brother house

A Netherlands-based non-profit group called Mars One is seeking video applications from pioneers willing to take a one-way trip to Mars and become stars in a new interplanetary reality show. "This will be the biggest thing that humanity has ever done. In 15 years people will still be watching," Mars One's co-founder Bas …

COMMENTS

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  1. Dragon Leaves
    Pirate

    history again...

    just send the convicts!!

    1. Thorne

      Re: history again...

      No send actual BB constestants. Getting kicked out of the house into non breathable atmosphere will make eviction night much more exciting...

      On the plus side, bogans are like cockroaches so the radiation isn't likely to kill them.

      1. JDX Gold badge

        Re: history again...

        The people need to be physically and mentally sound... BB are out.

        1. Rob
          Go

          Re: history again...

          On that basis, so's a large chunk of the population.

    2. LarsG

      A new TV series...

      Fantasy Island....

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: A new TV series...

        Holy cow could yo uimagine it? While you're on mars you could KILL EVERYBODY!!!

        Why would you do that? No law! it isn't owned by anyone you could murder all you want REDRUM REDRUM

  2. Richard Mason
    FAIL

    Reality TV fail

    How are they going to balance the intelligent, mentally stable people they'd need for a mission like this who don't normally make good reality TV subjects with the moronic, egotistical, mental trainwrecks who are normally chosen for reality TV programmes?

    I'm sure if watching astronauts training made good reality TV either NASA or the Russians would have done it years ago to boost funds.

    1. Don Jefe
      Happy

      Re: Reality TV fail

      It is for a TV show so you don't want mentally stable people, you want the crazy asshole that will open the airlock. Besides, there are huge chances that anyone young enough & sad enough to sign up for a one way trip to Mars will (hopefully) have found happiness 15 years from now and will not want to leave all that behind.

      1. Eddy Ito

        Re: Reality TV fail

        But if the crazy asshole opens the airlock won't that be the end of the show? Not sayin' that would be bad but if it happens early there are going to be some upset sponsors.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Reality TV fail

          > But if the crazy asshole opens the airlock won't that be the end of the show?

          There'll always be someone on the team who's smuggled an AK47 onto the ship, reday to blow away any dirty commie who opens the airlock or criticizes the flag. Probably disguised as a nun or something.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Reality TV fail

        You just need to tell them they'll be collected on another space shuttle.... Then forget to send it...

    2. Ru
      WTF?

      Re: Reality TV fail

      How are they going to balance the intelligent, mentally stable people they'd need for a mission like this

      Even if they start out as intelligent and stable, they won't stay that way long once they've been exiled to a caravan on an airless freezing ball of rock with three other human beings as their only company for the rest of their lives.

      If there's no plan to retrieve any colonists, they'd better send quite a few more than that at a time.

      1. Field Marshal Von Krakenfart
        Gimp

        Re: Reality TV fail

        How are they going to balance the intelligent, mentally stable people they'd need for a mission like this

        Well, that would not be necessary Mr. President. It could easily be accomplished with a computer. And a computer could be set and programmed to accept factors from youth, health, sexual fertility, intelligence, and a cross section of necessary skills. Of course it would be absolutely vital that our top government and military men be included to foster and impart the required principles of leadership and tradition. Slams down left fist. Right arm rises in stiff Nazi salute. Arrrrr! Restrains right arm with left. Naturally, they would breed prodigiously, eh? There would be much time, and little to do. But ah with the proper breeding techniques and a ratio of say, ten females to each male, I would guess that they could then work their way back to the present gross national product within say, twenty years.

  3. Eric Hood

    Self sustainability will be key. I would not like to be waiting for supply ships. There will be a need to import a whole ecology. Psychology experts could probably tell us the minimum amount of people needed to stop them going mad too.

    Hmmm, just a thought, if no one had a cold or flu when they arrived would they be free of it forever more?

    1. LarsG
      Meh

      Unless there is some nasty red planet disease waiting for them?

      1. AndrueC Silver badge
        Happy

        Unless there is some nasty red planet disease waiting for them?

        You mean one that turns them into psychopathic monsters? Surely not :)

  4. This post has been deleted by its author

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Like Nanny from Count Duckula is she?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    even better

    can the target audience go also ?

    1. Turtle

      Re: even better

      "can the target audience go also ?"

      Let me tell you what I think that the targeted audience should be targeted *with*...

  6. OzBob
    FAIL

    Streaming video,...

    except when Mars is in solar conjunction with the Earth ie. obstructed by the Sun. Major fail not to think of this, its not like it didn't happen in the last 3 weeks to the Mars Rovers.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Streaming video,...

      I'd be more concerned about it being a one way trip funded by a corporation who you NEED to stay financially viable for the entirety of your life otherwise you'll end up eating your "house mates" and eventually starving/suffocating. That's assuming Jack doesn't start typing out pages of "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" into a computer first.

      Given the attention span of the average human, this may get awesome ratings for the landing, and probably first year or two, but when all they're doing is eating, shitting and sleeping, those ratings are going to drop off rapidly until they start dieing - granted this may be accelerated by the Jack situation.

      1. Yag

        "Given the attention span of the average human..."

        Given what happened for the lunar landings, people won't even care for more than a few monthes...

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Streaming video,...

        > eating, shitting and sleeping,

        I suspect there'd be a 4th activity, especially if they've sent a mixed-sex group. That will always make for good TV, especially if they're of an exhibitionist bent. Dogging on Mars?

        The first few folks out there would probably have to agree to compulsory vasectomies, though, or there'd be worrying problems later.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Streaming video,...

          "worrying problems later". I think the worry is now, with the person presenting this idea as an actual thing, and not a film plot. At least behind a camera is safer than giving them a rocket.

        2. Eddy Ito
          Alien

          Re: Streaming video,...

          "... especially if they're of an exhibitionist bent."

          Wait, I thought that was a prerequisite for getting on these shows. I don't think vasectomies will be necessary as the show is undoubtedly planning on and looking forward to the birth of the first verifiable ET.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Please, please send Kate Do Nothing Middleton. It'll be so nice to NOT have to live on the same planet as her, plus, she will have to wear the same space suit as everyone else so no more dead trees showing off her ugly mug wearing yet another designer dress she never earned.

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Mars is only about 10% of Earth surface gravity, so kate, posh-spice and the rest of them would float off.

      1. Geoff Campbell
        Boffin

        10%?

        38%, it says 'ere. So they'd need a fairly robust kick up the arse to help them on their way.

        GJC

        1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

          Re: 10%?

          Yes, sorry it's 10% Earth's mass, 38% Earth's 'g' - read the wrong column

    2. JDX Gold badge

      I think the AC is a better nomination, get rid of all the bitter little idiots.

  8. MacroRodent Silver badge
    WTF?

    after the die-off

    Wonder how they plan to deal with the backlash if the whole crew dies en route or shortly after arriving? It would be the end of the show at least, will the broadcasters be wanting their money back?

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge
      Trollface

      Re: after the die-off

      They just shoot it in a studio like last time

  9. dssf
    Joke

    Yeh, as with ......

    Capricorn One

  10. Winkypop Silver badge
    Facepalm

    It would be great

    Until the target audience was distracted by the next shiny thing or PR stunt....oooh look, celebrity X has a baby bump!

  11. andro

    or... they'll just cash in on the 'were going to....' and it'll never actually happen.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Headmaster

      Shhhh. You'll put 90% of the market out of jobs once they realize all these scams... ahem, projects.

  12. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge

    On the more positive note ...... what IT can do for you ... and all that are yours to favour

    I have no doubt that we could physically place a human being on Mars. Whether they'd be able to survive for an extended period of time is much more doubtful.…… Dr Veronica Bray

    That depends Entirely, Mistress Veronica, on what they be doing together and what IT Generates and ITERates as the Virtual Realities to be Followed for Earthly Pleasures in Heavenly Treasured Deep Driver Information with SMARTR IntelAIgent Supply.

    And that takes Us All into Immediate Virtual Teleportation Territory which is where one is spoiled rotten for choice in every luscious sin that is not vice …..and therefore Satisfaction is LOVE's Great IntelAIgent Game.

    And what Delivers One LOVE in Live Operational Virtual Environments? Global Operating Devices Sharing Real Dreams, in Plain Text for Magic Pirate Pictures in Fine Private Hands…….. with Programs CodeX-XSSXXXX Triggers an ESPecially Immersive Program to Master and Enjoy, Mentor and Monitor …….. Virtually Driver Oneself.

    Hmmm? That would provide Spontaneous Instantaneous Remote Control Facility with All Orbiting Satellite Stations Communicating with Earth Base through Mars One Station X-XSSXXXX

    Wow, what delivers LOVE in Live Operational Virtual Environments is the Right Stuff and a Great Idea for Colossal Atlas Thought and Virtual Program Realisation.

    Second Nature and Normal to Martians does sort of dictate a Sweet Sticky Surrender and Submission to Pleasures with Alien Treasure Holders in Universally Strange Space Arrangements.

    Of course, if one realises that the concept/show is a military program spin off, does such ensure and assure and insure one of civilian success in the rendering for realisation of complex conceptual actualities and New Future WorldZ Virtual AIMachine ProgramMING?

    Which all says quite a lot, in quite a confined space, and that sort of thing tends towards situations and/or predicaments being volatile and explosive. :-)

    All in all, done properly is it guaranteed to be a huge market hit routing stocks and shares putting big business in panic and turmoil.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Prior art?

    Sounds like someone has got hold of a copy of Red Mars by Kim Stanley Robinson.

    1. MacroRodent Silver badge

      Re: Prior art?

      Not really. In Robinson's Mars trilogy, the first settlers were sent as a classic governement-funded mission, with US and Russia jointly running it, and there was no 24h reality TV involved (although the crew was expected to prepare broadcasts to Earth, just like current NASA etc. astronauts). On the other hand, the book is so old the Big Brother show had not yet been invented.

      As one of the few less-credible details in the otherwise rock-hard sci-fi book series, the ship the settlers travel on sounded like a luxury cruise liner, compared to what has actually been planned, there was even space for a garden, and a stowaway traveller...

  14. This post has been deleted by its author

  15. jake Silver badge

    So let me get this straight ...

    ... HOW many billion dollars, exactly, to park a few un-trained idiots ex-planet, just to watch 'em die? If anybody is actually stupid enough to be willing to go on such a suicide mission, I'm pretty certain that building a sound-stage, and then offing them here on Terra, would be a piece of cake ... for a lot less money. And the fucking idiots involved would probably actually believe they were dying on Mars ... as would the morons in the audience.

    Does anyone, anywhere, still believe that over-produced, over hyped, so-called "reality-TV" is un-scripted?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: So let me get this straight ...

      "... HOW many billion dollars, exactly, to park a few un-trained idiots ex-planet, just to watch 'em die?"

      Exactly. Bring back roman games I say, but with HD coverage. I'd even subscribe to Sky if they had Friday night gladitorial combat live from Millwall Colosseum. Now that wouldn't cost billions, and I bet there would be no shortage of people wanting a piece of the action.

    2. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: So let me get this straight ...

      Considerably less than the 100,billions of $$$ the US spends on "amateur" college football so that a bunch of testosterone cases can run around a filed chasing a bit of leather watched by fatter drunk testosterone cases

  16. Chris G Silver badge

    What's in it for me?

    I f I were to be a wannabe Martian and be lucky enough to be chosen, the sponsors are going to be making billions allowing the world population to watch me taking a dump on Mars; what will I be getting out of the one way trip to a planet with nothing on it to buy? Other than the opportunity to make one small dump for a man, one great (potential) environmental impact for Marskind.

    I suppose guaranteed payments to the family back on Earth might make it interesting but going to spend the rest of your life, however long or short that may be, in the depths of space or on aplanet without a breathable atmosphere with 3 people you may come to hate would need pretty good compensation.

    After all fame is not much use if you are not around to enjoy it.

    And would I have any say about the opposite sex accompanying me, as the general concensus now is that such a journey should have a mixed crew?

    1. MacroRodent Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: What's in it for me?

      Isn't an assured place in the history books enough? Later on they will probably even name Martian cities after the first settlers. But if that does not turn you on, don't go.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        MacroRodent

        Just like all those Luna cities? Or is that just speculation on your part?

        1. MacroRodent Silver badge
          WTF?

          Re: MacroRodent

          AC: "Or is that just speculation on your part?"

          Of course it is, what did you expect??? There is nothing else in this comment thread anyway (or for that matter in most ElReg comment threads...).

    2. MrXavia
      Alien

      Re: What's in it for me?

      I don't know how they would screen the people, but I hope they ensure its a 50:50 split male to female, and preferably couples...

      Can you imagine what would happen on a one way trip with only 1 woman but 3 men?

      anyone going should be going with the mind they are going to start the colonisation of mars!

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: What's in it for me?

        > only 1 woman but 3 men?

        It would be a hell of a lot worse with 3 women and 1 man. That might seem fun at first (for the man), but after a few months...

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: What's in it for me? @AC

          I suspect a single woman say no to 3 men wanting sex daily... and even if the woman is up for it... would she be able to cope???

          But a man? well no straight man would refuse 3 women taking advantage of him... sure it MIGHT get a bit sore on occasion, but there are plenty of ways to please a woman...

          Plus for reproduction, its better to have 3 wombs available than 1... and sperm can be brought in a freezer for when its needed (to ensure genetic diversity)

          1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

            Re: What's in it for me? @AC

            >no straight man would refuse 3 women taking advantage of him

            You mean 3 women demanding that the kitchen be cleaned, that clothes be picked up off the floor, that the garden be done, the car cleaned out, the door painted....

            I only have one women taking advantage of me and I'm knackered

  17. mIRCat
    Alien

    I'd hate to be kicked out of that house.

    <~~There is only place to board after that and I hear the little green guy snores.

  18. Chairo
    Big Brother

    The answer is simple

    Quite what these interplanetary reality-show stars would do if the public get bored with them isn’t explained on the Mars One website, however.

    Easy - no watchers - no funding - no supplies - they die.

    1. Yag
      Devil

      Re: The answer is simple

      I've got a solution... Send in a KITTEN!

      People will keep watching just to save the kitten :)

      Unfortunately, i'm pretty sure animal right activitsts will be outraged by putting the poor kitten in this predicament.

  19. John Smith 19 Gold badge
    Thumb Up

    I'm sure it would be more interesting if other people nominated them.

    After all that suggests they have enough self awareness that they are attention seeking fame whores.

    Now what about those who don't realize that?

    Thumbs up for this as Spacex can always do with a bit more non-NASA money to stop them drifting into govt contractor land.

  20. Trustme
    Stop

    Reality (show) check

    They're asking for SUITABLE people - people who can stand up under the rigors of the journey and then the actually landing and settling, all of which will take a strong mind and top physique. While the public will get to choose someone with a "bit of character", they won't be sending anyone with psychological problems or health problems for obvious reasons. I'm pretty sure a lot of those people will apply, but they won't get through the initial screening process. If reality show contestants could destroy the house and kill the show for another 15 years at a cost of $6 billion they'd screen them a lot more carefully too (although that would ironically make me more likely to pick up the phone and vote them in).

    1. JDX Gold badge

      Re: Reality (show) check

      Yes - it's a reality show aimed at geeks and people with a sense of adventure. I'm sure the masses will tune in to begin with but it will lose its attraction for them "day 70... still on the bloody spaceship"

  21. Jess

    Sad thing is

    this is probably the most likely way of funding such a mission I've heard.

  22. Captain Hogwash

    The Year Of The Sex Olympics....

    ...IN SPAAAAAAACE.

  23. #didIjusthashtagthis
    WTF?

    Sending fame hungary individuals with no connection to each other. What could go wrong?

    1. Fatman

      RE: Sending fame hungary individuals with no connection to each other.

      Survivor Mars Colony!

      Now taking applications for those exceptional individuals who seek out new and exciting experiences.

      Sign up for a 39 week year tour with Survivor: Mars Colony.

      In this new, uncharted territory, where being voted off the island has severe fatal consequences; learn to master The Game and Outwit, Outplay and Outlast your cast mates.

      You get such interesting opportunities such as cave exploration, experiencing food and oxygen starvation, extreme isolation, radiation exposure and more. You could be the one for the history books.

      Sign up today!!!

  24. g e
    Holmes

    "In 15 years people will still be watching"

    So long as you don't get IKEA to design your habitat modules or EDS HP to do IT

  25. Mike Simmons
    Childcatcher

    A Brilliant Suggestion???

    I suggest and nominate Bas Lansdorp as a compulsory member on this trip. I bet his ardour for this insane 'mission' would disappear in a nano-second if he knew he would have to go!

  26. Turtle

    Insurance.

    I have to think that, at some point in this venture, insurance is going to have to be gotten for the spacecraft, the lives and health of the people involved - both the organizers and direct participants, insurance for contractors' (and astronaut-trainees') performance or non-performance, liability insurance, insurance for the advertisers who will buy time in advance that will help fund the venture, and more kinds things than I could possibly even think of. And if the insurance can't be gotten, then the entire project will not get off the ground. (See what I did there?)

    And I can't see how anyone is going to risk it.

    And there is also the question of what kind of government permits they will need (if any) and from what governments? And mightn't a company that gets involved with a stunt like this risk damaging their reputation as a serious space enterprise to such a degree that they will become a sort of pariah amongst space companies? Really, these people are being sent off to live on Mars and at the end of such a tenuous and fragile supply-chain, that the chance of them dying is almost a certainty - and those deaths might be kind of gruesome.

    I can't really take the story seriously. Even if project is being seriously considered, the chances of it being realized are very, very remote.

    1. JDX Gold badge

      Re: Insurance.

      That's the attitude which got man on the moon...

      1. Turtle

        Re: Insurance.

        "That's the attitude which got man on the moon..."

        You do understand that there is a difference between a government agency and a tv production company, right?

        1. Captain DaFt

          Re: Insurance.

          "You do understand that there is a difference between a government agency and a tv production company, right?"

          Of course, TV production companies try to make a profit.

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    about $6bn estimate

    make it quadruple figure to cover the notorious human inability to predict real costs as seen on planet Earth, then quadruple again to around $100bn to cover all other eventualities and even that figure is probably waaay too low.

    Anyway, it's not that they're really planning to send people to Mars, it's a research project to study why people would go on a one-way trip, the Dutch are known to have announced "shock" projects in the past.

    now, where's me pills....

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: about $6bn estimate

      I think the factor we're all missing here is that the DUTCH are proposing to be the first to put people on Mars. I, for one, welcome... etc.

      As to budget escalations I'm sure that Martian Weed will sell for a significant mark-up in the usual locations around Amsterdam. It's amazing what hardware you can buy with drugs money.

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Can we send Eadon?

    With just a Surface for company!

    1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge
      Trollface

      Re: Can we send Eadon?

      How many years to download Windows8 SP1 from Mars?

  29. Simon Harris

    Big Brother...

    Ah, there's a quote from the inventor of Big Brother, whose production company, Endemol, brought us Space Cadets.

  30. This post has been deleted by its author

  31. Green Nigel 42
    Trollface

    What utter tosh

    Sorry , must rush or the BB Ark will leave without me, and the mutant star goat gets us all.

  32. jai

    what happens...

    ...when someone goes nuts from space-sickness (i believe that's the medical term) and runs around the Mars house with an axe, painting the walls?

    obviously, the ratings go through the roof, but presumably there's a delay in transmission, so by the time the editors see the first victim get an axe in the head, the psycho has already killed the rest and is standing in front of a camera, with his own eyes in the palms of his hands saying "liberate tutemae ex infernis" over and over....

    1. Esskay
      Coffee/keyboard

      Re: what happens...

      If they're sending Big Brother contestants, the I for one would love to see this play out, regardless of how pointless and unnecessary an axe in each Mars House (the proper engineering term) actually is.

  33. Nuke
    Thumb Up

    My Nominees :-

    Gates, Balmer, Steve Job's corpse, and a token H-1B worker. Gates loves non-flushing toilets anyway [www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-19271061] so he will be in Heaven.

  34. chrisf1

    Space Cadets 2?

    I know I'm cynical but is this actually the first move in series 2 of Space Cadets?

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Space_Cadets_(TV_series)

  35. Maharg
    Stop

    Lack of research

    They obviously haven’t’ watched any films set in space, ever, don’t they know when you stick a group of people alone away from earth something God ’awful happens? (I don’t mean the God ‘awful film version of Lost in Space with Joey from Friends).

    “ And now we see our four brave contestants, Miss Ripley, Mr Bishop, Mr Riddick and Captain Pinbacker, all boarding the Ship Event Horizon, where they will be assisted on their trip by the on-board computer H.A.L…”

  36. Dave Walker

    The move "Mars" from 2010

    "Mars" (2010) has a similar plot.

    I want the space suit with the cowboy fringes and appliques :-)

  37. Flakey

    Upvotes for all mentions of Event Horizon, a classic movie

  38. Palf

    It would be really boring without something worthwhile to do. So they need basic tools to build more stuff, like bulldozers, 3D printers, the ability to craft electronics and bowls etc themselves.

    But if a bunch of hairdressers are sent, nothing will happen - Golgafrincham disease. "Have you seen my rubber ducky, Number Two?" and "We've decided to revalue the sand"

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