back to article Second International Cat Video Festival coming to Oakland CA

The second international festival celebrating cat videos will be held in Oakland, California, this May, an event at which grimalkins and their bipedal slaves will spend a day reveling in the art of filméd felines. No, it's not yet April Fool's Day; there really is an International Cat Video Festival. The inaugural bash was …

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  1. Ketlan
    Happy

    Overlords, my arse

    Until they learn to put bread around their faces, they'll never rule us!

    Er...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      The only

      Good cat is a dead cat, then they at least have a use.

      Once skinned and de-clawed they make great polishing cloths for my car.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: The only

        The claws are excellent long lasting recyclable toothpicks.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        WTF?

        Re: The only

        Oh come on!! Down voted twice?

        I'm a cat lover, but even I can appreciate the books "101 uses of a dead cat" etc. Post isn't worth an up vote, but neither is it worth a down vote.

        1. Shagbag

          Freak Show

          While there's nothing wrong with having a pet, I find the photo both offensive and disturbing. Why anyone would want to go to that extent and make themselves look like their pet is beyond me. No Sir. These people need to be euthanased.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Overlords, my arse

      There are Americans that 'marry' their pets, including dogs, cats, goats................

      What more can I say?

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Devil

    Civilisation has reached the tipping point

    It's all downhill from here.

  3. jake Silver badge

    The pseudo-ferals, living in the offices's rafters ...

    ... have all turned their backs to me, after reading this. Seems they are disgusted by the very concept. I'm serious ... and I find their reaction extremely funny. Doing my damnedest not to laugh ... Never laugh at a cat, especially a house-broken feral. S/he'll find a way to put rodent parts into your .fav Ariat riding boots[1].

    Cats. They are wise, and nobody has ever truly owned one :-)

    [1] Don't ask how I know ...

  4. Chris G

    Pussy?

    I love cats and at one time between my house and the stables I used to rent; I had fourteen. I still have two in my house now as I like to have a pussy around to spoil but dressing up as one? I think the pussies in the lead photo need a slap!

    Nice to see the money raised is going to an animal charity although the whole thing looks like a trekky fest gone feline.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Single Blokes

      Who own cats.... Enough said.

      1. jake Silver badge

        @AC 08:21 (was: Re: Single Blokes)

        Nobody has ever truly "owned" a cat.

        That's why the Ethernet Bunny is steering clear of these here parts.

  5. frank ly

    I have a bad feeling about this

    "So far Dusty's owners claim he has stolen 213 dish towels, .......and other miscellaneous objects."

    They need to check around the neighbourhood for reports of missing electronic devices, batteries, guns, ammunition, etc.

  6. Christian Berger

    Of course it's a German invention

    Germany already produced films of cats in the 1970s.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXmFDRwEpv0

    http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pausenkatzen

    This video is still shown in abbreviated versions today.

    1. Frumious Bandersnatch

      Re: Of course it's a German invention

      Germany already produced films of cats in the 1970s

      And Japan had its famous autocatography 『吾輩は猫である』 ("I am a Cat") back in 1906. This fascination has obviously been going on for quite a while, so it's unsurprising that modern humans are still in thrall to the cat.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Of course it's a German invention

        The little fuckers even have their own country... or they will as soon as they break away from Spain.

  7. Mike Flex
    Coat

    ...bands (singing cat-themed songs)

    Such as?

    I can't get no catisfaction

    Eleanor Catsby

    Sittin' on the tail of the cat

    Feline Groovy (by Simon & Catfunkel)

    1. Frumious Bandersnatch

      Re: ...bands (singing cat-themed songs)

      No need to mangle other songs when there are plenty of cat-related titles already...

      Year of the Cat

      What's new Pussycat?

      The Lovecats

      The Lion Sleeps Tonight

      Don't Go (by the Hothouse Flowers, thanks to "black cat lying in the shadow of a gatepost" verse)

      Cool for Cats

      Anything by the Pussycat Dolls, Cat Stevens, "Catatonia", Felix da Housecat or Bass Kittens. Also songs from "Cats" (the musical), The Lion King, and probably many more...

      1. beep54
        Happy

        Re: ...bands (singing cat-themed songs)

        Can't forget this classic:

        Shake, Rattle and Roll (I'm like a one-eyed cat peeping in the seafood store)

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: ...bands (singing cat-themed songs)@Frumious Bandersnatch

        Methinks you have too much knowledge of these Artists and songs...... Your listening choices appear to have been outed.

  8. David Pollard

    Toxoplasmosis

    Although not the only explanation for people's fondness for cats, toxoplasmosis does have an increasingly well-documented effect on behaviour. Parasitic infection could well explain some of the zany behaviour of "bipedal slaves" that is associated with cats.

  9. Matt Bryant Silver badge
    Unhappy

    <Sigh>

    I expect a massive spike in bandwidth useage by the female members of the household.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Females only?

    There seems to be a certain amount of sneering in the article that this cat internet meme is mainly a female obsession.

    I give you <drum roll> "Engineer's Guide to Cats" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHXBL6bzAR4

    - 6 Million plus views.

    A Sign of either, growing gender equality, or the end of civilisation

  11. The Wild Tomcat

    I'm down with this.

  12. Will Godfrey Silver badge
    Unhappy

    Detest the evil things

    I used to have birds nesting in my garden hedge till a woman moved in next door with 4 cats. Now I've not seen a bird anywhere near my garden for years. Instead I get the delight of cats screaming at each other in the middle of the night.

    The same cats crap all over my lawn, chew on the shrubs and pull up flowers. They've also wrecked one of my fences by continually jumping onto it from the ground.

    Said neighbour has now got all huffy because I try to discourage the lazy, fat, wildlife killers.

    1. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

      They're not evil

      They're just fulfilling their biological imperative. It's the owner that deserves and should attract the scorn.

      Also I'm curious... are these cats Panthera, or was your fence made of balsa?

    2. jake Silver badge

      @Will Godfrey (was: Re: Detest the evil things)

      Cats won't soil their own nest. Our acreage belongs to the cats. They share with the folks east, west, and south of us (all of whom understand cats). The cats pee and poop at the outer corners of the ranch, where it won't get in anybody's way ... and in the fancy rose garden/pool area of the asshole who lives just north of us. He hates cats, and they carefully return the favo(u)r ...

      The idiot to the north is clueless. And has a serious rodent problem ...

    3. LarsG
      Meh

      Re: Detest the evil things

      You could try orange peel on the garden, failing that, collect the sh*t and then throw it back late at night.

      My neighbour who had the cat (they've left now) asked me if I had seen any cats climbing over the fence into his garden. He couldn't understand why he had so much sh*t in his, as his cat never made a mess in the garden!

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Detest the evil things - try a catapult

        If the orange peel doesn't work a catapult can provide an effective way to protect wild birds.

        1. jake Silver badge

          @AC: 0851 (was: Re: Detest the evil things - try a catapult)

          Orange peel doesn't work; it's an old wives tale. The local ferals prowl the citrus groves (thankfully!).

          Note to my fellow Yanks: "catapult" is British for "slingshot". It's one of the few methods of varminting that the poor insular bastards are left with. Me, I use a .22 for small feral critters that are causing trouble. Cheep, clean, easy, no muss, no fuss.

          Clean headshots on a couple of wild quail with the same .22 make for easy dinner for the Wife & I ... why should the cats have all the good chow?

          1. Will Godfrey Silver badge

            Re: @AC: 0851 (was: Detest the evil things - try a catapult)

            My fence is (was) a perfectly conventional one in good condition and about 10 years old. However, with 4 cats jumping at it from the ground, sometimes two at a time it doesn't take long to loosen the top rail, and once that's gone the much thinner panels don't last long.

            I must admit the idea of giving them lead earrings is attractive, as is using a catapult on them, however even if it's not quite illegal, I'm sure that were I to do such a thing I'd soon have screaming hordes of the feline-obsessed beating down my front door. Besides, the cowardly pests are only there when I'm not - most notably at night.

            I saw a youtube video once that was just perfect. A guy had linked a camera system to a water cannon, so it not only sensed the movement but tracked the cats as they ran off. I think of it as a science project. All that lovely mathematics calculating the precise angle and elevation for the cannon to stay on the fleeing feline.

            No problem with the downvoters - you're just proving my point.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: @AC: 0851 (was: Detest the evil things - try a catapult)@Will Godfrey

              You can get a non harmful spiky edging to fix to the top of the rail to stop them walking the line. Works really well, in fact better than catching them in a cage and releasing them 50 miles away..... They always seem to find their way back.....

            2. Dr Dan Holdsworth
              Happy

              Re: @AC: 0851 (was: Detest the evil things - try a catapult)

              I had one which got into the habit of pissing in my backyard. Dousing the yard in Jeyes Fluid didn't work, nor did supposedly repellent garlic essence (repelled me pretty effectively, though). A cat training device which consists of a can of compressed gas, linked to a valve with a passive infrared trigger did work, and worked very well.

              The moron moggy in question always jumped down into the yard at the same spot. A bit of trial and error allowed me to put the spraycan device right next to the favoured landing spot; I now have a video of cat walking along wall looking into yard, cat jumping down into yard, cat getting faceful of compressed gas, cat reacting in great fear and jumping out again. Said cat managed a standing 7' jump straight upwards at this point.

              I haven't seen the little sod in the back yard since (and neither has my CCTV), and with it not pissing in there, the other local felines have also concluded that pissing there isn't useful, either; the entire episode had mostly consisted of a territorial dispute conducted mostly through scent. Nasty evil scientist with a PhD in pheromones that I am, the next stage would have consisted of trying to lie to cats with pheromones; the Silent Roar product (sold as fertiliser because they cannot sell it as anything else) does just this, as it consists of lion droppings. If there's one thing cats fear (apart from home-made autoguns) it is bigger cats.

              In the absence of a pheromonal repellent, some sort of autogun is the way to go. Actual lethal devices aren't necessary; all you have to do is convince the local cats that your garden contains a mysterious invisible waterpistol-carrying maniac who cannot be seen, heard or smelled but has uncannily good aim. Cats are not particularly smart animals at the best of times; they do learn, albeit slowly, but outwitting them isn't difficult.

      2. beep54
        Devil

        Re: Detest the evil things

        I just ran across this recently. Seems tin foil is an amazing cat repellant http://www.snotr.com/video/10539/Tin_foil_is_Cat_repellent My guess is it is exactly like accidentally chewing on foil.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Detest the evil things

      Flicking the sh*t back is extremely therapeutic. Orange peel may not work for you but rubber bullets (blue tack) from an air rifle just at the moment of crapping can be extremely effective. Especially if you hit the centre of the target. They learn quickly do cats.

  13. exp(x)
    WTF?

    Uhhh

    The Walker Art Center is in Minneapolis, Minnesota. It is not is Wisconsin.

  14. Dire Criti¢
    Thumb Up

    It's what the Interwebs are for...

    ...a never-ending series of pussy films.

  15. Drew 11
    Thumb Down

    So many cats, so few recipes.

  16. Chris King

    Purrmageddon !

    I wonder if this was the date the Mayans had in mind for the end of civilisation as we know it...

  17. sisk

    So judging from what this article says it sounds like cats domesticated humans. Further it seems they did so for basically the same reason that humans domesticated cows: it makes getting food easier.

    Just further proof that we are, despite what we think, a slave race to our feline overlords. Grumpy Cat will no doubt have some biting words for me for pointing this out.

  18. Andy 70

    marking your turf

    ever think about marking your own yard? communicate on their level.

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