BOFH: Climb the corp ladder - and use your boss as a bullet shield "It's like progress bars," I say to the PFY during a discussion about the relative merits of the company management as we ride the lift to the CEO's office to fix some laptop crisis. "All too often the bar itself bears no relationship whatsoever to the amount of time you're going to wait. In the same way the salary of a …
...or a favorite relative comes on as his boss
Relative? You mean those people who bug the BOFH on his days off with computer questions? Surely he can't have a favorite amongst them. Unless it's the one who actually knows how to run a computer, and such a person would never be hired by HR as a boss.
The Dilbert character is a minor character, all praise to the Wally, the one true office terrorist and the only who truly understands how the office really works.
I started off in workstation local support\helpdesk with Windows 3.11 machines and I now work with server services (Windows 2008R2, Vmware, Netapp, etc) and my official title has never changed in 15 years from 'Information System Technologist'. I still feel a little embarrassed whan I have to write it on a form.
At WROK PALCE, mentioning outsourcing (of IT) usually leads to a visit to the roof top deck, and an invitation to take in the view from the plank.
Watch for falling MBA's is printed on a sign attached to the wall below the plank.
also noticed the increasing use of "Architect" as a JD buzzword.
First we had "Manager". Everyone from the janitor up was a "manager" of some kind. Then there was "Specialist". Then "Engineer". Now we have "Architect". What's next? Doctor?
That'd be good: Toilet Cleaner -> Waste Manager -> Hygiene Specialist -> Sanitation Engineer -> Health Systems Architect -> Epidemiology Doctor...
Wow, your part of the planet must be really behind. "architect" was taken over by IT over 10 years ago.
A company I worked for back then was in the same building as a real architectural firm. Every day I'd here how unhappy they were that their title had been absconded with. It was similar to the grumblings of EE grads about the term engineer years before that. As I recall both groups tried to get the terms locked down through the legal system; but that seems to have failed miserably.
I can't say I know what the current hot titles are now. Haven't paid attention to them in years. Not that it ever mattered, except in large companies where titles like "software specialist III" mIght be found.
We threw that one up, against the wall, and came up with this:
That'd be good: Toilet Cleaner -> Waste Manager -> Hygiene Specialist -> Sanitation Engineer -> Health Systems Architect -> Epidemiology Doctor...->Asshole Manager
Now, why did that chick from HR suddenly turn beet red when that one got suggested??
Enquiring minds want to know?
We shot1 ours, as she came up with this clusterfuck of a GUI for an in-house app that NO ONE LIKED. There was loads of bitching about it. When the (tech savvy) CEO says it is a piece of shit, then you know you are in trouble.
1 "Shot" as in fired, not executed.
Now, can anyone describe a (L)user Experience Architect?
The consensus (at WROK PALCE) is that such a person works at Microsoft, in the Windows 8 department.
#include <stdio.h>
#include <stdlib.h>
#include <limits.h>
#include <errno.h>
#include <string.h>
int main(void)
{
char *g1[] = {"Essential", "Directed", "Measurable"};
char *g2[] = {"Vision", "Service", "Delivery"};
char *g3[] = {"Targets", "Metrics", "Outcomes"};
size_t n1 = sizeof(g1) / sizeof(g1[0]);
size_t n2 = sizeof(g2) / sizeof(g2[0]);
size_t n3 = sizeof(g3) / sizeof(g3[0]);
unsigned int seed;
int w1, w2, w3;
FILE *dev_random = fopen("/dev/random", "rb");
if ( dev_random == NULL )
return EXIT_FAILURE;
if ( fread(&seed, sizeof seed, 1, dev_random) != 1 )
return EXIT_FAILURE;
fclose(dev_random);
srand(seed);
w1 = n1 * (rand() / (RAND_MAX + 1.0));
w2 = n2 * (rand() / (RAND_MAX + 1.0));
w3 = n3 * (rand() / (RAND_MAX + 1.0));
printf("%s %s %s\n", g1[w1], g2[w2], g3[w3]);
return 0;
}
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