back to article Playboy fined £100k by Blighty watchdog for FLASHING SMUT at kids

Playboy - the world's best-known porn brand - has been fined £100k ($160k) by Britain's communications regulator, after the publisher failed to prevent children from accessing smutty material on its websites. Ofcom said that Playboy TV and Demand Adult had "allowed users to access hardcore videos and images without having …

COMMENTS

This topic is closed for new posts.
  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So does this apply to ANY website that lets you go to pornography without putting in a credit card number.

    Because that must be, what? 20-30% of the Internet? Alright, most won't have a UK base to be fined in the first place, but hell - that's a very, very lax interpretation that affects millions of websites.

    I don't know of anyone who uses pornography regularly who actually PAYS for it at all, let alone would even trust their card to be used on the sites they visit. And yet, they are not breaking the law in doing so themselves, but the websites are for not demanding a credit card number?

    Just seems like a way to cut all pornography being accessed from the UK worldwide, and getting a lot of people scammed when they MUST enter their credit card details "in order to verify their age".

    Honestly, that appears to be something far more overreaching that it at first appears.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      I tend to agree with you that there's more to this than meets the eye. This is just the start of them coming for the porn.

      If anything, they should be relaxing the draconian UK laws on R18 content, not increasing them. In the UK, the only way to legally buy R18 porn is either from licenced sex shops in person or to import it yourself from abroad. Yet, it has the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe, despite other countries in Europe having a much more relaxed attitude towards R18 content. So it's obvious that they're barking up the wrong tree and censorship is a waste of time.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Err?

        You can see pretty much anything which is legal to see (ie: Not animals or underage) in r18 porn. I'm not sure that it should be supplied outside of sex shops, it's available from web sites by streaming or delivery in UK/EU and the world over, so I don't really see that as a problem. However, I'm not sure why you think that supplying porn will have any effect, particularly a positive effect, on the levels of UK teenage pregnancy. I would have thought, if anything, the availability of "consequences free" sex, ie: kids see sexual images and activity, albeit not too explicit, everywhere, they don't see people getting pregnant, getting STIs, being upset because of relationship breakup, etc.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Err?

          "I'm not sure why you think that supplying porn will have any effect, particularly a positive effect, on the levels of UK teenage pregnancy."

          Studies in the 1970s showed that various European countries had much lower rates of teenage pregnancy than the UK. The kids in those countries also had a better attitude to doing well at school. The other correlation was that Sweden, Denmark, Netherlands, and Germany had liberal attitudes to sex education and also porn.

          When formulating the 2003 Sexual Offences Act the body of Westminster MPs, and "morality" vested interests, decided to ignore European liberal examples - and took USA repressive attitudes as "best practice". The USA actually had a worse teenage pregnancy rate than the UK.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Err?

            Not sure there is a link there - the US had far more liberal porn laws, but they didn't have the same level of sex education and openness.

          2. MrZoolook
            Megaphone

            Re: Err?

            "Studies in the 1970s showed that various European countries had much lower rates of teenage pregnancy than the UK. The kids in those countries also had a better attitude to doing well at school. The other correlation was that Sweden, Denmark, Netherlands, and Germany had liberal attitudes to sex education and also porn."

            How many of those give free money and houses to pregnant teens though,like the UK. I would suggest that the reason we have a higher then average teen pregnancy rate is also as much because we reward getting pregnant, and we are well known to accept the dregs of OTHER societies as our own, including lazy ass scum with nothing to add to their community except babies.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: Err?

              You repeat a myth from right wing media, and politics, which you seem to have lapped up entirely. There is no such thing as deserving and undeserving poor, particularly when those poor people have children to look after. What is the state supposed to do, put them in a workhouse?

            2. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: Err?

              "we reward getting pregnant, and we are well known to accept the dregs of OTHER societies as our own..."

              Please fuck off back to the Daily Mail website. Thanks.

            3. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: Err?

              @ MrZoolook

              How many of those give free money and houses to pregnant teens though,like the UK. I would suggest that the reason we have a higher then average teen pregnancy rate is also as much because we reward getting pregnant, and we are well known to accept the dregs of OTHER societies as our own, including lazy ass scum with nothing to add to their community except babies.

              So much fail, so little time.

              The irony is that these are countries with much more liberal social policies as well.

              As for the EBIL IMIGRANT PREGGERS HOWZING TEIFS, well, that is also largely a myth as well.

      2. Thomas 4
        Coat

        This is just the start of them coming for the porn.

        Nope, far, far too obvious really.

      3. Abot13
        WTF?

        Its not about the porn

        It is just another coöperation between the banks and government to force everybody to pay for a credit card. I dont want one and have no use for one, so I am degaded to a second class citizen with fewer rights then those who pay their credit card "tax"

        commercial items should never be a tool for identification or an age check. besides I predict a fast black market economy for credit card details among the youngsters who want to see the modern day equivalent of the rags we used to read before we were 18.

        no justice in this ruling once again, the banks dont need pron to be creaming after this one

    2. g e
      FAIL

      Coming soon...

      Mother fined £12k for not locking bathroom door causing little Jimmy to cop an eyeful when he accidentally walked in for a pee.

      1. steogede

        Re: Coming soon...

        >> when he accidentally walked in for a pee.

        Why would little Jimmy "accidentally" walk into the bathroom for a pee? I could understand if you said he 'accidentally walked into the kitchen for a pee'.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Coming soon...

        How exactly does one accidently walk in for a pee?

    3. Thorne
      FAIL

      Little Johnny can find hardcore stuff that makes Playboy look tame using Google in three seconds flat.

      Type your perversion in, turn safe search off, select videos or images and suddenly all the smut you could ever watch in a life time at your fingertips.

      Just shows what a total waste of time these watchdogs are...

  2. Haku
    Facepalm

    £100,000? Yeah, that'll teach em...

    It's not even one month's salary of Hugh Hefner:

    http://www.celebritynetworth.com/richest-businessmen/ceos/hugh-hefner-net-worth/

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      Re: £100,000? Yeah, that'll teach em...

      I get the feeling that it's a mere cash grab for an extended annual vacation......

  3. The Alpha Klutz
    Stop

    lol

    none of the porn sites i go on need a credit card. If I'm gonna be watching hardcore porn everyday I at least don't want it on my credit report.

  4. mark 63 Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    Just in time!

    Phew , thats stemmed the flood of internet porn into our youngsters lives.

    They're just gonna have to wait till they're 18 now

    Job Done

    Ofcom saves the day!

    And evil multi billion dollar Playboy slinks away nursing wounds after 100K thrashing

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    When I were a lad

    It certainly seems easier to access this kind of stuff than it was when I was growing up.

    Kids don't know how good they've got it.

    1. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
      Happy

      Re: When I were a lad

      Back in my day, the black bin bag full of porn in the woods always used to ask if you were 18 before it would open...

      Given that wherever Scouts go camping there were always bin bags full of porn in the surrounding woods, does that mean that porn grows on trees?

      1. ukgnome

        Re: When I were a lad

        When I were a lad I was approached by a taxi driver asking if if I wanted his smut collection - I was on my morning paper round at the time and eagerly stashed the grot mags in my delivery bag.

        Back then things were easier, I wouldn't be able to access this sort of filth now as I don't own a credit card.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: When I were a lad

        Hedgeporn was not the same as what is available on the Internet these days.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: When I were a lad

          It had hair for one.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: When I were a lad

          "Hedgeporn was not the same as what is available on the Internet these days."

          You're right. These days porn stars have discovered razors.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: When I were a lad

            I've just found a black sack of vintage grot in what was the airing cupboard of the house-converted-to-offices where I work.

            AC in case the boss sees this.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: When I were a lad

      How lucky young boys are... when I was younger you had to go looking through the woods for magzines left behind by some kindly sole... I even knew someone who went to through bins near golf courses... apparently the amount of porn around such locations was so immense that the embarrassment was worth it.

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: When I were a lad

        "some kindly sole".

        As in the fish, or the bottom of a shoe?

        Answer and your soul will be saved...

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    In other news violence and murder are still 100% OK for our yoof to watch.

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      "You can get a gun licence at fourteen, but you can't buy a porno magazines until you're eighteen... ...I'd much rather a fourteen year old lad was locked in his bathroom causing no harm to anyone than sat on a roof with a high-powered rifle and an erection he can't get rid of"

      - Bill Hicks

      The other comedian this article brings to mind is Al Murray 'Pub Landlord', on the subject of asking a young person their data of birth "the test our whole system of age restriction is built upon". I think the film Hot Fuzz riffed upon the ridiculousness of the same idea .

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      The UK thankfully is a more restrictive on violence than nudity in general than the USA...

      I would much rather my son saw a couple having sex than excessive violence....

      Lets make love, not war!

      1. Osmosis Jones
        Alert

        what about sexual violence

        Recent anecdotal evidence has shown that young people who are exposed to porn develop a skewed conception and expectation of sex.

        Lets be honest most porn on the net is less about sex then it as about "control" as a form of gratification (after all it is simply prostitution with a camera plonked in front). For most adults this is bleeding obvious but for the less uninitiated this is not. For such youngsters, I fear, it will have a lasting impact on their sexual relationships.

        Sorry tried to find the link to a guardian news article that summarised a phenomenon were young people involved in rape or underage sex reported that they were copying what they had seen online. But there js a number of news articles about individual incidents. just google.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: what about sexual violence

          Recent anecdotal evidence has shown that young people who are exposed to porn develop a skewed conception and expectation of sex.

          My anecdotal evidence is that young people today have the same ability to separate fantasy from reality as previous generations and porn is looked at with that in mind.

          Interestingly, less anecdotal evidence shows that despite netpr0n corrupting every young mind, people are generally better disposed to each other, relationships are more equal and sexual assaults are no more prevalent now then they were 20 years ago (and in some UK regions have dropped significantly).

          That said there is still an unacceptable rate of offence and woefully inadequate system of dealing with reported offences, but that isnt anything to do with teenaged boys cracking one off to grot. (and amazingly, it seems even some women watch porn as well..... even before we get started on the crap that is 50 Shades of Gray).

        2. EvilGav 1
          Thumb Down

          Re: what about sexual violence

          "skewed conception and expectation"

          What? They get the expectation that they might enjoy it? They get an idea of mechanically what to expect and how to go about it (I mean more than the crap videos we got at school)?

          Conception is another way to say opinion, so is the young peoples opinion skewed or is it yours?

          1. Osmosis Jones
            Stop

            Re: what about sexual violence

            jesus man!? did you take a course in being an idiot or just some kind of natural savant?

            your definition of conception is plain wrong.

            If you ask someone with a decent command of english they might point out to you that this discussion is about pornography (staged, artificial, fictitious, stylized representations of the concept of sexual intercourse) as opposed to sexual education material. Then you might understand that my point about the impact that staged, artificial, fictitious, stylized representations of the concept of sexual intercourse has on young people who have little alternative experience to act as a reference point for reality. This has nothing to do with opinion whatsoever.

            Unless of course you live in a world where your partner is happy to offer anal intercourse to every delivery man that visits your house. Then yes my opinion is skewed and pron is a great reference tool.

  7. Will Godfrey Silver badge
    Meh

    Hmm.

    When i was a lad I had no trouble finding 'naughty' stuff. I wouldn't have a clue were to even begin looking now

    1. Darryl

      Google?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      OK, hand in your testicles at the door.

    3. Ian Yates
      Pint

      Replace either the "you" or the "tube" in the popular phrase "youtube" with any sexual noun or verb and you're likely to find something.

      Cheers

      1. Anonymous Coward 15
        Paris Hilton

        You want me to replace my "tube" in what?

  8. Grikath
    FAIL

    and of course...

    The average teenage kid does not know where his parents' credit card(s) live...

    Given that it is incredibly easy to access megatons of porn of an endless variety *absolutely free* with at best a warning you may enter a site that could possibly contain adult content, I really wonder about the actual competence of the busybodies doling out those fines. Or what planet they live on, for that matter.

    It is a given fact of nature that any reasonably healthy lad* will get interested in tits 'n ass from roughly the age 12 and up. It is also a given fact that said healthy lads *will* find a way to get their hands on materials that will provide a relief for this quite healthy and natural urge. It is also a given fact that any repression of availability of those materials will, in fact, make them seek it out even more, as it coincides with the rebellious streak that is associated with their developing personality, and having access to "the Forbidden Fruit" gives extra Cool Points at that age.

    So really, what's the point....

    * anecdotal evidence points to girls starting earlier, but with a different focus (in the UK seemingly provided by Boy Bands), but as a male I'm (still) not really fluent enough in Female Reasoning to have a confident opinion in this matter.

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: and of course...

      One approach might be to allow younger lads access to respectful and tasteful trouser-arousing material, rather than leave them to stumble across the objectifying 'gonzo' stuff.

      Lawrence Llewellyn Bowen was on the radio yesterday, saying he used to draw copies of the erotic drawings of Aubrey Beardsley (whose life the programme was celebrating) and sell them to his classmates- and he surely wasn't the first. There are worse artists for a young man to be acquainted with when making conversation with a certain type of young woman. Alphonse Mucha is good, too.

      >* anecdotal evidence points to girls starting earlier, but with a different focus (in the UK seemingly provided by Boy Bands),

      Or, by making advances at boys their age who haven't quite developed their romantic/sexual feelings yet, leading to mutual confusion. But hey, confusion is what teenage years are for.

    2. This post has been deleted by its author

  9. RISC OS

    but why are they paying pb....

    ...when youporn is free?

    1. Sir Runcible Spoon

      Re: but why are they paying pb....

      or even redtube (well named that one)

      1. Andy ORourke
        Happy

        Re: but why are they paying pb....

        Or Pornhub (or so I hear)

        Oh, BTW, Porn sites, bit of a waste of time having thos share on facebook widgets don't you think?

        1. This post has been deleted by its author

          1. MrZoolook
            Trollface

            Re: but why are they paying pb....

            "XHamster even has a dedicated UK section.." with 'verified by visa' links covering the best bits.

        2. Voland's right hand Silver badge
          Devil

          Re: but why are they paying pb....

          "Oh, BTW, Porn sites, bit of a waste of time having thos share on facebook widgets don't you think?"

          You misunderstand the function of the widget. It is not to share - it is to allow advert brokers who use FB to correlate your browsing behavior. As long as you are logged into FB going onto a site with the widget ends up in FB "snoop" files (ditto for other similar Web2.0+ lowlife). So an advertiser can after that use that to try to peddle you stuff.

      2. Don Jefe
        Joke

        Re: but why are they paying pb....

        If it is red have it examined...

  10. Dick Emery
    Paris Hilton

    Moral ineptitude

    Again with the 'sex is bad' slant and over reaching 'we must protect the children from smut at all costs' bollocks. Seriously. Humanity is really dumb sometimes (I'd argue most of the time). Children snigger and laugh at sex not because sex is funny (well I do find it amusing but only because others find it offensive). But because we as a species have put it into the category of something that is to be hidden away and ridiculed. That it is something we only talk about behind closed doors. This obviously filters down to our ever so curious children.

    I thought we got rid of this silly stigma with the AIDS stuff and sexual education years. Now it seems we are back to prudish moral crusades led by those who have nothing better to do.

    Do gooders and prigs the lot of them!

    Oh and they should take notes from countries like the Netherlands.

    1. Don Jefe

      Re: Moral ineptitude

      Sex is often hilarious to watch and this certainly isn't a human specific viewpoint. Watch geese go at it sometime. Even other species of bird create a real ruckus while the mating pair are doing there thing.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Watch geese go at it sometime

        mate, no one here's judging you.

        but why tell us?

      2. cortland

        Re: Moral ineptitude

        "... the position is ridiculous."

        -- Jonson

      3. cortland

        Re: Moral ineptitude

        "... the position is ridiculous."

        -- Samuel, not Ben (Johnson)

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Moral ineptitude

      There is a big difference between sex in a loving relationship, general sex with a "fuckbuddy", softcore and hardcore porn, especially the sort of hardcore porn hosted on many Internet sites.

      I wouldn't really give two tosses if my kids were seeing the sort of porn that I found in a hedge as an early-teen, however I would be very concerned if they were looking at the sort of porn that has a row of guys fucking a guy/girl several at a time, often slapping them verbally abusing them, pretty much exclusively without any protection. If that's the sort of thing you like, that's fine, but I don't see how it's ok for someone who isn't old enough to drive a car or vote to be able to understand what they are seeing is not "normal" and that there are subtleties to sexual activity which they will learn about in later life. Specifically: Some people like to be degraded, tied up, gang banged, whatever, but this is by no means everyone and certainly not to be expected from someone.

      1. MrZoolook
        Megaphone

        Re: Moral ineptitude

        "I don't see how it's ok for someone who isn't old enough to drive a car or vote to be able to understand what they are seeing is not "normal" and that there are subtleties to sexual activity which they will learn about in later life. Specifically: Some people like to be degraded, tied up, gang banged, whatever, but this is by no means everyone and certainly not to be expected from someone."

        And I don't see how a country with representatives that find porn so immoral as this seems to indicate, can give serious consideration to allowing kids to vote in a general election at 16, consume alcohol at 16, 'learn' to drive at 16, and do a whole slew of other things that can be deemed in some way wrong or harmful at 16... yet the one thing they actually care about enough to try and stop outright, is watching actors on screen having sex. An act which humans have been doing since the dawn of our time on Earth. And which, if viewed by some speccy loser in his own room, will have no long term damaging effects to him, or - and this is the important part - unlike learner drivers crashing into pedestrians, alcoholic fuelled outbursts of violence, and ruining an economy after voting in the next cool dude politician into office based on his haircut... will harm nobody else!

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Moral ineptitude

      Simple..

      Sex good

      Violence bad

      kids will be kids, and better them kissing than kicking...

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Facepalm

    Its never the parents fault eh?

    Now, I'm not claiming that trying to protect minors from more grown up subjects is a bad idea, absolutely not. But I am reaching a point where I'm getting a little fed up with the fact that its always the other people's problem and responsibility, NEVER of the kids or parents themselves.

    I know this is not fully comparable but here in Holland its illegal for kids under the age of 16 to own alcoholic beverages. So far so good; I'd say that if you spot a kid drinking alcohol then he or she will get fined, most likely resulting in the parents (who are legally responsible for minors) to cough up some bucks.

    But no; that's not the way we do it. We force supermarkets and other shops who sell alcohol to make sure that they don't sell it to minors. If they do they can be fined pretty hefty because this is obviously a very bad thing to do; shame on them! And the kids themselves who bought the alcohol? Well; that's usually way too much effort to bother with. Instead certainly agencies sometimes get a few minors to help them "protect the children" (or put differently: get minors to perform illegal actions by purchasing alcohol, then fining the supermarket for selling it to them).

    As said before: having some kind of protection for those kids isn't a bad thing at all, but to fully and whole shove the responsibility onto other people is IMO. Whatever happened to taking responsibility for ones own actions?

    Amazing; if you go to the playboy website then chances are high you'll get into contact with adult material. I think almost everyone who has an Internet connection knows that. So if you don't want your kids to get near that; why not block it or (*gasp*) actually talk to your kids about these subjects so you'll know they can deal with it.

    But no; we'll just blame it on the others for not blocking it. That's much easier and better. As if those kids know that if you fill in 1960 as the year of birth you'll get access to adult contents no matter what.

    1. Fuzz

      Re: Its never the parents fault eh?

      not usually, I drank pretty much every week from when I was 15 until I was legally allowed to buy alcohol at 18, (I didn't stop then but that's beyond the scope of this comment). My parents would have been outraged if they had known but I would go out and stay with friends or come back late after they were in bed.

      If you have a law that says it's illegal to sell alcohol to minors then it makes perfect sense to test and prosecute shops that don't comply with that law.

      1. Mark Burgum

        Re: Its never the parents fault eh?

        so basically thats saying its ok to punish someone for not knowing the age of the person - which always seemed wrong to me and at the same time not punish the underage person who knows full well he's commitining an offense - its got so bad here that my wife who is 34 years of age needs to carry her passport to buy alcohole etc.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Its never the parents fault eh?

        If you have a law that says it's illegal to sell alcohol to minors then it makes perfect sense to test and prosecute shops that don't comply with that law.

        I suspect part of the point was that the wording of the law is also mistaken.

        You are basically saying here that despite you being aware what you were doing was wrong to the point you went to lengths to hide it from your parents, the shop should be punished for your behaviour not you - or your parents (who, arguably, should have supervised you more at that age, given your obvious inability to control yourself).

        But yeah, its all the shops fault, isnt it. If they had been better at not selling you alcohol, you wouldnt have found other things to do, would you?

  12. Lars Silver badge
    WTF?

    Determining you age over the internet

    Determining you age over the internet is a joke and will remain so, credit cards or not. I have no solution to this, but porn, how the hell could you get rid of that, and I seriously wonder if there is any sense in even trying (unless you are out for the money, of course).

    1. Lars Silver badge
      FAIL

      Re: Determining you age over the internet

      Came to think of it, kids in demand, will find their share even reading the bible. (Some faint memories, not that impressed then though, perhaps).

      1. Lars Silver badge
        Pint

        Re: Determining you age over the internet

        My last attempt to find the answer to how to determining the age over the internet is some sort of an quiz. Is Lincoln a car or very rich man or a dead president, Is Elvis a cat or a song or man living on the moon.

        Might help but I have been wrong sometimes too.

        1. vonBureck
          Childcatcher

          Re: Determining you age over the internet

          > My last attempt to find the answer to how to determining the age over the internet is some sort of an quiz.

          Ah, so you do remember the "age verification" in the old Leisure Suit Larry games :) Is Pia Zadora: a) short b) sexy c) a singer d) all of the above

          Though nowadays that probably only tests googling prowess, so that rather defeats the object :)

          Icon compulsory

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Determining you age over the internet

            Wonder if anyone remembers an old DOS (I think) game called Sexcapades. used to be bootlegged at markets, lots of 18+ material. Great educational material looking back.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Determining you age over the internet

        "Came to think of it, kids in demand, will find their share even reading the bible."

        "Song of Solomon" was quite erotic for a 1950s generation raised on the totally airbrushed body detail in windblown "Health and Efficiency" magazines. The activities of King David rivalled "Peyton Place". Another source for teenage curiosity was the library's large foreign dictionaries. The Modern Hebrew dictionary scored highest for phallic slang terms.

        The local charity shop has a separate book section for kids. Yesterday there was a copy of "Bored of the Rings" alongside the Enid Blyton tales. Someone had obviously read the small paperback's synopsis about elves and thought "lampoon" just meant humour. If they had flicked through it they would soon have realised it is a parody of "Lord of the Rings" - with the "missing" sex scenes. It would certainly have widened a child's vocabulary.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Determining you age over the internet

          I'm not aware of any sex scenes in Bored of the Rings, unless Schlob complaining about her ex-husband qualifies. I would have assumed it was put there by someone who, like me, thinks the Tolkien output is largely barely readable dreck, and wanted to inoculate kids against believing that, just because it has long words in it and goes on about elves, it's some kind of literature.

          Some protective parents like it because, even in the middle of a battle, nobody ever registers the slightest emotion.

          In Terry Pratchett's books elves are evil little bastards who would kill you as soon as look at you, which is about what they are like in the original legends.

        2. Jamie Jones Silver badge
          Thumb Up

          Re: Determining you age over the internet

          "I'm fairly sure if they took porn off the Internet, there'd only be one website left, and it'd be called 'Bring Back the Porn!'"

          — Dr. Cox, Scrubs

        3. cortland

          Re: Determining you age over the internet

          My Dad had some translated Chinese writings on the subject. The good parts were in Latin.

          Clever blokes, those Englishmen.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Determining you age over the internet

      Simples. The viewer must have a working webcam so their 'age' can be checked by an 'appropriate person'. Said webcam to remain all at all times to prevent the use of a still image to fool the checker, this will also provide instant feedback as to how good the 'performance' is......

    3. Shonko Kid
      Holmes

      "I have no solution to this"

      I do, don't let kids access the internet unsupervised, until you are confident that they are old/mature enough to understand that there's shit on the internet they'll wish they'd never seen, that it's not how normal people treat other people, and no matter what, they need to treat others with care and respect.

      It's that simple.

      And I guess, 'allowing' your teenage son to find your stash of Razzle would probably divert their interest from the internet anyway.

  13. g e
    WTF?

    Eh?

    Playboy + Hardcore ?

    Really?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Up

      Re: Eh?

      Exactly. The women in Playboy are about as sexually arousing [and slightly less lifelike] than the average shop window dummy.

      Anyway, as the man said:

      "Soft porn... People who hate porn hate it. People who love porn hate it. What's the point?"

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Missing the point somewhat.....

    I have long thought that FINING is the new TAXATION.

    Pick your fights carefully though.

  15. JimmyPage
    Meh

    Ofcom, not ATVOD

    or whoever ?

  16. imba

    Now i dont know much about these sorts of thing...

    But these new "Porno" website like Pornhub, Youporn Spankwire and the likes dont ask for age verification at anypoint. So will some one please think of the children!

    Surely nobody actually pays for smut anymore.

  17. Fiddler on the roof
    FAIL

    Pointless

    It's pointless to try and stop kids accessing porn, they want to and were telling them not to which pretty much guarantees they will give it their best shot (no pun intended). As kids are generally pretty tech savvy they will probably succeed. Even if we were to manage to restrict access to porn to most kids it will only mean lots of nerdy kids driving Porsches as they make a fortune selling porn to their class mates.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Pointless

      Bring this reality please.

  18. Bagpuss
    Big Brother

    Credit Card Age Verification

    "Credit cards, unlike debit cards, are not available to under 18s"

    This statement by OfCom is extremely misleading. Pre-paid credit cards are purchased by over 18s and given to under 18s all the time. They serve a very useful purpose, but there is almost no way to tell which numbers are pre-paid and which aren't. The whole "selling knives online" debacle which fell at the first hurdle after gaining so much attention in Parliament touched on the subject, and it would have been the perfect time to address this issue.

    A simple solution would be to enter the credit card number and name on card along with a separate over18-pin set up by the card holder. Pins can only be set up on non-pre-paid cards. You don't enter the CVV or expiry date, so no charge can be taken. The three pieces of info supplied are then checked against the card issuer's DB and access is granted. If you're purchasing knives (or other age restricted goods) then CVV and expiry/start date ARE required to complete the transaction.

    I'm sure there are holes in this, but you get the idea!

    1. Anonymous Coward 15
      Thumb Down

      Re: Credit Card Age Verification

      And if you have a foreign credit card? Or mum and dad have never heard of this new over-18 PIN, and therefore have not set it up, so when the kid finds the card he sets it up himself?

  19. Dire Criti¢
    FAIL

    When the hell...

    ...are these fucktards going to realise that porn isn't harmful... lack of sexual education is.

    Block what kids want and they just keep on going to find it. That's what kids do. So give it to 'em and let them get bored with it (like I am) as it's no longer 'forbidden fruit'.

    1. Thorne

      Re: When the hell...

      The Oatmeal sums this up best

      http://theoatmeal.com/pl/senior_year/sex_ed

  20. jke

    Foolishness

    A credit card's first line of defence is to check that the card number is a Luhn number. These are not hard to generate. Since no twelve year old is dumb enough to use any but a stolen card number at a porn site it would be a nice little business for the mathmatically inclined child to supply such numbers for a small fee.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Foolishness

      on the subject of foolishness there are enough dickheads that tweet their card details that any kid would just have to follow a few of the retweeters to get enough to pass an age verification or even in some cases a simple paywall.

  21. MissingSecurity

    I thought,,,

    Google was the best known porn brand.

    ..and if you're using VPN's, you can get all the lovely bits other countries punters are trending with the same search term.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Relationship with compulsory ISP opt-in for "over 18" material?

    So commentards don't think this has any connection whatsoever with the UK's proposals for ISPs to be required to provide compulsory "opt in" for over-18 content?

    http://www.theregister.co.uk/2012/08/27/childline_calls_on_opt_in/

    Nobody?

    OK. It seems it's true, too much does wreck your brain.

    ;)

    1. Intractable Potsherd

      Re: Relationship with compulsory ISP opt-in for "over 18" material?

      My first thought, too. Isn't it obvious?

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Just ban porn!

    1. MrZoolook
      Trollface

      "Just ban kids!"

      *fixed*

      1. Anonymous Coward 15
        Coat

        To ban kids, you'll have to ban the act that leads to kids, and there'll be a hell of a lot more demand for porn.

  24. Synja
    WTF?

    Wait... Playboy == Hardcore?

    Really?

    1. Thorne
      Angel

      Re: Wait... Playboy == Hardcore?

      When your a religious nutjob, anything not wearing a burka is hardcore...

  25. Anonymous Coward 15
    Stop

    What if you don't have a credit card

    even though you are over 18, because you don't need the credit facility or have been refused one?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: What if you don't have a credit card

      Clearly, Ofcom is saying that those with bad credit line is banned from accessing porn on the internet.

  26. Trevor 3
    Pint

    The UK is a funny old place

    You can have sex legally at 16, but you can't watch porn until you are 18.

    So if you film yourself having sex you cant watch it back for 2 years. Shocking.

    1. EvilGav 1
      Stop

      Re: The UK is a funny old place

      Even worse than that . . .

      You can legally be married, have a child and be making the beast with two backs regularly at 16, but taking a photo of your naked wife when she's still 16 is actually illegal!

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    When I were a lad. Part 43

    Finding some old stick mag was like finding treasure.

    The kids these days, eh?

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    As long as it's not that "consensual sex in the missionary position" stuff. Disgusting.

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Oh fucking really....

    Porn? People fucking on film?

    "Playboy was accused of repeated, serious and reckless behaviour by failing to protect children from accessing the sites. Ofcom explained:

    There are a number of controls that websites can use to verify the age of users. This includes asking for credit card details before any adult content is made accessible. Credit cards, unlike debit cards, are not available to under 18s. Playboy TV and Demand Adult had breached UK rules by having no effective systems in place to protect under 18s from unsuitable free and paid-for content."

    Oh fuck no! Thank christ for that. Someone has finally fucking saved us from the moral decay sweeping through society.

    And this smacks of dumb fuckness beurocracy "Oh the rule book says".....

    I mean there are billions of pictures, stories, and films of people fucking just EVERYWHERE all over the internet.

  30. This post has been deleted by a moderator

This topic is closed for new posts.

Other stories you might like

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2022