back to article Assange needs to get some sunlight and fresh air, say Ecuadoreans

Julian Assange™ is sick. That's the medical verdict according to the Ecuadorean embassy in London where the WikiLeaks founder is currently holed up. He is seeking a safe passage to the South American country and the latest tactic appears to be to complain about his health. A lack of sunshine and living "in a confined space" …

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  1. Whyfore
    Joke

    And I guess Ecuador has just the right amount of sunshine he needs

    Wonder if this excuse works the workplace too...

    1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
      Happy

      Re: And I guess Ecuador has just the right amount of sunshine he needs

      "Wonder if this excuse works the workplace too..." Well, if the building doesn't have adequate ventilation and levels of lighting then it can't be fit for purpose. Send in the health inspectors, if it doesn't pass muster then condemn it and close it, and then arrest St Jules seeing as the building no longer has any diplomatic protection. If it passes, than as you were.

      1. Scorchio!!
        Thumb Up

        Re: And I guess Ecuador has just the right amount of sunshine he needs

        I understand that Swedish healthcare is among the best in the EU, along with the CJS. Relax Jules, this won't hurt a bit.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    medical care

    if he needs medical care, he should get it.

    Karolinska has a good reputation, i've heard ..

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Ronnie Biggs Lite

    Ah the poor little lamb has a nasty cough.

    Got no time for this waste of oxygen and if it's too cold and dark in London then he should've got on the plane to Sweden and faced trial while the sun was still out.

  4. kyza

    Windows. Open them.

    I've passed this building.

    It has windows.

    He could open one and lean out.

    Sunshine? He's in the UK, not bloody Australia.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Windows. Open them.

      or let someone donate some money to build a balcony for him.

      Any way, considering how much free time he has, you'd think that he will sit by the window and read a book!

      1. Fred Flintstone Gold badge

        Re: Windows. Open them.

        They upgraded to Windows 8, and we *know* those panes don't work..

    2. jonathanb Silver badge
      Black Helicopters

      Re: Windows. Open them.

      He can't lean out because then he would enter UK territory and could be arrested, presumably with the aid of a cherry picker truck or black helicopter.

      1. Fred Flintstone Gold badge

        Cherry picker truck

        Why a cherry picker truck? I though they needed all of him in Sweden?

        Oh, wait..

  5. tkioz
    Trollface

    Well to be fair to the little twerp... the human body does need sunlight, even convicted murderers get yard time.

    1. Zaphod.Beeblebrox
      Gimp

      As far as I'm concerned, it couldn't have happened to a more bizarre guy.

    2. NogginTheNog
      Thumb Down

      Though unlike convicted murderers

      Mr. Assange is free to leave his self imposed prison any time he likes.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    facing time.

    He's lucky right now.

    Otherwise, going to Sweden he could face the prospect of being locked up in a room for 23 hours a day without access to fresh air or natural light... Oh, hang on a minute.

    So, he's basically "doing time" already, out of his own choice.

  7. Desktop Mobile
    Black Helicopters

    Confined Space

    "A lack of sunshine and living "in a confined space" has given Assange a chronic lung infection, apparently."

    They got Lead/Arsenic in their paint over at 3 Hans Crescent London as Her Majesty seem to have plenty of people in confined spaces receiving limited sunlight who do not get Lung Infections.

    The only resident I heard who suffered from these symptoms in a confined place was Napoleon & he had access to plenty of Sunlight etc on Saint Helena.

    Send in the crack Painting & Decorating "Assangination" Squad

  8. Androgynous Crackwhore
    Black Helicopters

    Methinks he hasn't properly thought this through...

    Does he really want to swap a pleasant enough life sipping tea with the likes of Lady Gaga and MIA in his nice flat in Knightsbridge, even with bronchitis and perhaps a touch of rickets, for a rather hectic last few days darting around Ecuador dodging unseen Yank's bandito's pot-shots?

    I know the London winter can be trying but suicide? Someone get the chap a SAD lamp!

  9. Neil Barnes Silver badge
    Joke

    Are the Ecuadorans planning on smuggling him out?

    "We regret to announce that Mr Lasagne passed away from an unfortunate wasting disease of the lungs. He expressed a wish to be buried in his adopted country. Please stand aside to allow the coffin to pass."

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Are the Ecuadorans planning on smuggling him out?

      In the interest of Health & Safety I think it would be proper to insist the aforementioned coffin is air tight..

      1. Zaphod.Beeblebrox
        Coffee/keyboard

        Re: Are the Ecuadorans planning on smuggling him out?

        That caught me off guard!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Are the Ecuadorans planning on smuggling him out?

      Maybe they could appoint him as the cultural attache, and he could then claim diplomatic immunity on his way out. That should cause the twerps of our government to splutter in indignation.

      1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
        FAIL

        Re: Re: Are the Ecuadorans planning on smuggling him out?

        "Maybe they could appoint him as the cultural attache...." Ledswinger, do you have the attention span of a goldfish or just run a year behind everyone else? As has been pointed out on these forums numerous times, HMG would have to accept his appointment as a member of diplomatic staff, he can't just be imposed. They also can't just make him a member of a diplomatic mission to another country, e.g., make him Cultural Attache to Venzuela, as that does not give him any protection in England which he wuld need to travel out of the country.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Are the Ecuadorans planning on smuggling him out?

          Well, evidently I haven't been paying the close attention that you have. That suggests that you either have plenty of time on your hands, or you attach great importance to trivia such as this.

          But it's a free world. Except for Assange - maybe he should go on hunger strike in protest at his self imposed confinement, and take himself to the ECHR.

          1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
            Facepalm

            Re: Re: Are the Ecuadorans planning on smuggling him out?

            ".....evidently I haven't been paying the close attention that you have...." This is my surprised face, honest!

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Thumb Down

              Re: Are the Ecuadorans planning on smuggling him out?

              No, that's your "As usual I've run out of anything useful to say, but due to my poor self esteem I need to have the last word" face.

              1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
                Happy

                Re: Re: Are the Ecuadorans planning on smuggling him out?

                Cry more, this is my "honest I do care face". As with the majority of A$$nut groupies, you just hate it when your lack of knowledge and blind faith in St Jules is exposed.

  10. Stratman

    He's not being held prisoner, he's not being prevented from leaving and seeking medical help.

    He does however set his own priorities.

    1. ItsNotMe
      Devil

      If ever there was a Poster Child for Birth Control...

      ...it surely is JA.

      Working on a retroactive spray form right now in the lab. Just need someone to test it on. Hmmm. "Oh Julian...would you mind leaning out the window just a little further please?"

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Smells like bullshit.

    As others have said, the building has windows, which, occasionally (including today) give access to sunlight.

    1. Simon Harris

      I wonder if it's really embassy code for...

      'He eats all our food,

      he drinks all our wine,

      he's always having friends round for tea...

      ... isn't there some way we can get him out of here?'

      1. Fred Flintstone Gold badge

        I did sort of predict this - he doesn't exactly have a reputation of being easy to live with..

        1. Scorchio!!

          I believe he has the unfortunate habit of eating all of the condoms. ;->

      2. Matt Bryant Silver badge
        Joke

        Re: Simon Harris

        and he won't leave the poor cleaning lady alone!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Not quite right, sunlight isn't what the body needs. It needs UV light to produce vitamin D and glass filters out UV light.

      So unless they leave the windows open (not much chance of that in this weather), he will be missing out on vitamin D.

      1. Tom 38
        FAIL

        Er, so he doesn't need sunlight, he needs UV light. Where do you think UV light comes from?

        Just because you can only see the visible spectrum does not mean that is all that is in sunlight.

        1. DF118

          @ Tom 38

          I always thought glass filtered out the majority of UV. I'm not 100% on that though, so I won't go so far as to say fail on you.

      2. veganhead

        Vitamin D

        Vitamin D is added to margarine, you don't need to go to Ecuador for Vitamin D, a trip to the local supermarket by one of the embassy lackeys will soon solve the problem.

        1. LateNightLarry
          FAIL

          Re: Vitamin D

          Don't know about the UK, but in the US Vitamin D is added to almost all milk sold in the various retail outlets...

          Are they charging him for the food and beverages he consumes? If not they should be, and if he can't pay for it, then show him the door to the sidewalk. If he can afford to have Lady Gaga and other stars in to visit, he should be paying for their victuals as well...

          After all, he is a failure... at life.

  12. Marvin O'Gravel Balloon Face

    He has been looking a little pasty recently. Maybe at Christmas he could come out and have a game of football with the policemen guarding the Embassy. You know, just like in the trenches.

    1. Steve Knox

      He has been looking a little pasty recently.

      Read: since his first ever public appearance.

  13. Simon Harris
    Coat

    'living "in a confined space" has given Assange a chronic lung infection, apparently.'

    So, presumably, he's a different sort of hacker now.

    ... mine's the one with the Strepsils in the pocket.

    1. NoneSuch Silver badge
      Devil

      Re: 'living "in a confined space" has given Assange a chronic lung infection, apparently.'

      @Simon Harris

      Decent joke (thumbed up), but Saint Julian is no hacker. He is a poser. Strepsis cannot cure that.

  14. cs94njw
    FAIL

    Government has agreed to let him get medical treatment, but they should say "tough".

    You broke our law by hiding in an embassy.

    You hid in a building which perhaps doesn't have all the mod-cons like fresh air (but yeah, it's got bloody windows though), and even the ability to leave your domicile.

    Who knows whether he's guilty or not, but so far, Sweden has never been fingered as a malicious or unfair country. And if anything, I would expect them to protect him more than the UK.

    Jeez - just leave the embassy, get on the plane, and sort this out.

    1. kyza

      Sweden...

      ...is even colder & darker than the UK at this time of year. His condition would worsen, requiring his immediate removal to somewhere hot & sunny, perhaps a Caribbean island resort.

      1. Wade Burchette
        Joke

        Re: Sweden...

        I hear the Guantanamo Bay resort is sunny and warm.

        1. Zaphod.Beeblebrox
          Trollface

          Re: Gitmo

          Oh yeah, now that sounds like just the vacation he needs!

      2. James O'Shea Silver badge

        Re: Sweden...

        " perhaps a Caribbean island resort."

        I'm sure that Jamaica would be perfectly happy to park him in Horizon Adult Remand Centre, Kingston, Jamaica. For a small fee. He'll get lots of fresh air, and none of that health-sapping air conditioning, and, given the way that it has about 50% more inmates than it was designed for, he'll meet all kinds of new friends. And if he gets a cell on the top floor he'll even have a nice view of Kingston harbour. <http://wikimapia.org/#lat=17.9827334&lon=-76.8092823&z=18&l=0&m=b&v=8>

        And the oil refinery. And the city sewerage works. That should clear up that nasty cough.

    2. Psyx
      Alert

      "Government has agreed to let him get medical treatment, but they should say "tough"."

      No: We can't stop a doctor visiting an embassy of another country.

      That said: He can cry me a fscking river, for all I care. I just hope the little twerp doesn't actually die and give the conspiracy loons more to bray about.

      1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
        Devil

        Re: Psyx

        "....conspiracy loons...." Shush! Stop ruining my fun, I was just about to suggest to them they should check his keffiyah for polonium.....

  15. CCCP
    FAIL

    "...could get worse at any moment...."

    So this would put him on a par with the rest of the 7 billion people on the planet then who occasionally fall ill and "get worse".

    I wish people wold stop giving a toss and commenting. Oh wait...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Peek a Boo

      Perhaps he'd feel better by trying to emulate the daily regime of Bradley Manning by playing a spot of peek a boo and going a bit mad after a being striped naked and mentally tortured by Lady GaGa.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Peek a Boo

        " after a being striped naked and mentally tortured by Lady GaGa."

        Mmmmmmmm. If I hole up on the Ecuadorean embassy will that offer be open to me?

  16. Rob
    FAIL

    I don't know the building that well...

    ... but doesn't it have a roof, most buildings with four walls that are being used tend to have a roof, I would assume it probably has a flat roof as well being in a very built up area.

    Or is he that paranoid that a sniper might take him out or snatched by a helicopter.

    Everything aside, guilty or not, this boils down to the guy just being a plain twat.

    1. SkippyBing

      Re: I don't know the building that well...

      I don't think the roof is part of the embassy though, as I understand it the embassy only occupies part of the building, the rest may even be flats.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I don't know the building that well...

      Rob, no government is going to martyr this guy by using him for target practise. Not only would it give him (belated) more prominence that he deserved, it would also stir up a whole new club of deluded idiots.

      1. Rob

        Re: I don't know the building that well...

        @AC 13:12 I know, but doesn't stop Assange from being a paranoid delusional twat though.

  17. Dave the visionary

    Simple Solution...

    Prisoners are entitled to outdoors time. They get several hours a day in most countries even here in the UK!

    1. Stratman

      Re: Simple Solution...

      He's not a prisoner. He can leave whenever he likes.

  18. That Steve Guy

    A lack of sunshine and living "in a confined space" has given Assange a chronic lung infection

    Well it was his choice to live in that confined space and he has every right to choose to leave it if he wants fresh air and/or medical treatment.

    If you choose to hide out in bad conditions and then your health suffers because of those conditions then you cannot blame anybody else for it.

    1. Scorchio!!
      Thumb Up

      Re: A lack of sunshine and living "in a confined space" has given Assange a chronic lung infection

      In the army there was once a category of offence known as 'self inflicted wounds'. It might still exist for all I know.

  19. Nick G
    Holmes

    So his health "could get worse at any moment".

    So could mine - can I get a trip somewhere warm please?

    1. graeme leggett Silver badge

      Going by the picture you are looking a little drawn and lack colour in your cheeks. Tell you what, you nip off to the south coast of France for a week and I'll OK it with your boss.

      But you ought to give up that filthy pipe, it's not good for you.

  20. Dave 62
    FAIL

    Renovations..

    With all the money know doubt being thrown at him by his rich friends and celebutards, why doesn't he bank roll some renovations of the embassy? Like.. you know.. aircon? Sky lights? A rooftop terrace? That'd make for an interesting episode of Grand Designs.

    Just so long as they don't get Assangination Painting & Decorating Ltd. in to do the work.

    In all seriousness though, he's made himself look a real twat with this.. even more so. Now if he's just got an infection, fine, that happens, but blaming his terrible living conditions is not doing him any favours.

  21. Bobthe2nd

    Masked Ball

    Is not the solution a masked ball, lots of guests, slips out with the crowd, private diplomatic flight etc. etc.

    1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
      Facepalm

      Re: Masked Ball

      "Is not the solution a masked ball...." It's not actually a big building, it's just a few rooms in a converted flat. Anything more than six or so people and they wouldn't even have standing room, so any seventh guest exiting the bulding would be suspicious.

  22. Anonymous Coward 101
    Facepalm

    Just...

    ...bugger off to Sweden, will you? Fanny.

  23. Lee Dowling Silver badge

    But surely there's nothing stopping him having medical treatment?

    Anyone with the ambassador's permission could come in and treat his (self-inflicted) condition, no problem at all. And the government are unlikely to play dirty tricks there. All he has to do is phone for a doctor.

    If it's a serious medical condition, though, then after suitable examination, if it were necessary, any doctor in the world would say that he required hospital treatment. And *that's* the part that gets really interesting. A criminal (skipping bail makes him one, whether you believe anything else or not) on the run, saying he needs medical assistance and asking for, what? Some sort of amnesty of his crime while he gets treated and then taken back to the embassy? Unlikely.

    If Ecuador still haven't extradited him it's because we're not going to let them to do so (which we're actually perfectly entitled to do, just because of his skipping bail, before you even get into any other alleged crimes - the only *alleged* crimes, the skipping bail is now permanently-recorded fact). If he is making himself ill, there's probably even more of a case for the Ecaudorian ambassador to give him up, or for him to give himself up. Hell, if he's deliberately choosing to make himself seriously ill, there's probably a good case for medical intervention anyway, for his own health (which would make an interesting law case in the case of a holed-up criminal in an embassy, but sadly less interesting headlines). If you tried, you might even be able to get him sectioned for refusing urgent such medical treament.

    Or he could, you know, open a window, take some medication, call a doctor.

    Or he could, you know, give himself up. He's been unlikely to "go missing" since long before the embassy thing started.

    Personally, I think it'll be good practice for when the Ecuadorian embassy gets sick of him and the associated diplomatic deadlock, and hands him in, and he spends time in jail (for skipping bail if nothing else).

    1. jonathanb Silver badge

      Well he would be allowed to attend the hospital and complete his treatment, however the police would be waiting outside the hospital to enter and arrest him as soon as he is discharged.

    2. I'm a GP, get me out of here
      Alert

      (This is really boring, apologies in advance.)

      The embassy can't just call a doctor. Any doc from outside (ie from the UK) is only registered/licensed to practice in the UK and not Ecuador, which technically is what the inside of the embassy is. If I (a UK GP) went in and gave him a (private) prescription, I would almost certainly be breaking Ecuadorian law as I'm not registered to practice there. My own licensing body here in the UK, the GMC, would almost certainly take a dim view of that should someone complain. Which inevitably someone would, given the high profile nature of this.

      I suppose there may be the odd doctor here and there who for some reason has registration/license to practice in both countries. Or is on holiday from Ecuador.

      Whatever.

      The point is I couldn't just go in and treat him.

      But he could just come out. Of course he'd get (re)arrested.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: UK GP

        except that it's not ecuador: diplomatic missions do not enjoy full extraterritoriality, just special privileges granted by the vienna convention - while this includes immunity from local laws, it does not legally remove the embassy from the host state.

  24. Velv
    Trollface

    "but the city is also dark at this time - we have very little daylight in London"

    An what about the other 8 million people who live in London? Don't they need some sunshine?

    Is Ecuador going to take all the Londoners to South American for some sunshine? And keep them? Please?

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    He needs sunshine?

    Funny, that - if I read all those posts of people who still support him, all he'd have to do is put a mirror behind his ass..

  26. Fred Flintstone Gold badge

    Evidently..

    .. man cannot live on Ferrero Rocher alone..

  27. Fred Flintstone Gold badge

    I have the PERFECT medicine for a nasty cough.

    All he needs to take is a strong laxative. Not so much because it cures the problem, more because he would't DARE cough then..

    (Yes, I'm in an evil mood. Why? Does it show?)

  28. envmod

    don't care

    fuck julian assange. geezer's an idiot.

    1. Fred Flintstone Gold badge

      Re: don't care

      Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't "fuck Assange" the exact reason this mess exists?

  29. warmonkey

    If I recall correctly, doesn't he have a balcony? Surely they could have a whip round and get him a deck chair or something.

  30. This post has been deleted by its author

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: He's the first person...

      You know, I'm not even going to bother answering this one because it's evident you cannot read..

    2. kyza

      'We know this for a fact...'

      ...We know this for a fact, because he has offered to hand himself over to them many many times, provided they provide written signed guarantees that he wont be handed straight over the the Americans.... and they refused. '

      He's asked for a guarantee that no government on earth can legally give. If he was going to be kidnapped by the US they can't guarantee it because rendition is big grey area in international law, and there's no way that a Law&Order minister is ever going to pre-empt the result of any possible fully legal extradition hearing. He knew he was asking for an impossible guarantee, it's all part of the St Assange the Martyr image.

      By seeking asylum in the Ecuadorian embassy he has actually broken UK law now - he's jumped bail - so irrespective of anything he does now, he's got an actual charge which is pretty irrefutable to deal with in a UK court.

      1. Scorchio!!

        Re: 'We know this for a fact...'

        Oh, another one who cannot read; "...We know this for a fact, because he has offered to hand himself over to them many many times, provided they provide written signed guarantees that he wont be handed straight over the the Americans.... and they refused. '"

        You know for a fact, or should know for a fact if you are well read, that the Swedes cannot extradite him to the US without our approval; it would be easier for the US to 'render' him (the correct term is extradite BTW) to the US under our oh so easy extradition agreement, which seems to work in their direction more than it does in ours, thanks to Mr. T Bliar et al..

        Secondly, no legal system can give such an unconditional agreement, if only because other offences (think of something shocking, such as murder, or slavery) might have been committed and later detected. It is simply not possible.

      2. Scorchio!!

        Re: 'We know this for a fact...'

        "He's asked for a guarantee that no government on earth can legally give."

        No, no! It is all a conspiracy I tell thee!

    3. KirstarK

      Re: He's the first person...

      IIRC he was asked to use a condom claimed he was using it but wasn't

      Ask your wife / gf / sister close female friends how they would react to that

      Also there is nothing wrong with sleeping heavily. She may have woke up just as he entered. No matter the details she was not willing as she was not awake. therefore its rape. Again as wife / gf / sister etc how they would feel if they woke up to find someone having sex with them.

    4. Lee Dowling Silver badge

      Re: He's the first person...

      If the law forbids that action in Sweden, then the law in Sweden forbids it. It's as simple as that. They didn't go making up new laws that day just to get him and, as you point out, haven't actually CHARGED him with that (and could quite happily do so in his absence). He's wanted for questioning. That doesn't mean he can't be extradited for that questioning.

      The teacher who run off with the kid to France? Depending on the circumstances, not technically illegal, if she's over-age. But they still put out a Europe-wide APB on him, got him, brought him back to the UK for questioning and that's where formal charges were filed. This "you must be able to prove your charge immediately before arrest" pseudo-culture among people on the Internet that's popped up lately is new and has no correspondence to the laws of arrest. Just how often do you see "X is wanted for questioning by the police" or "X was made to appear at a police station to answer questions" (e.g. recent Saville enquiries, etc.). You can be extradited AND arrested AND put in a police cell for a couple of days AND questioned just on a hunch. Always have been able to, always WILL be able to, because otherwise law enforcement is useless. What you *can't* be is sentenced and put into a prison without a trial (*cough* other countries please take note *cough*). And you can be "dearrested" at any point without charge. Charges and arrests are two ENTIRELY different things. It's a European ARREST warrant for questioning on suspected CHARGES.

      The US thing? That's stepping on an awful lot of international laws (not all of which the US are signed up to which makes a lot of their requests and promises meaningless anyway), of which many will trump a one-time say-so on an international arrest warrant. It's like saying "I'll let you arrest me, so long as I'm allowed to go free if a goose lands in my prison cell". You will never, ever, ever get a judge to agree to that in a million years, even if it'll never happen, because there's a chance that you could be let off if someone promises you something that stupid and is then required to keep to their word.

      And that's *all* besides the point because after going through the law system in this country, and several layers of appeals, and everything else, and the UK police SENDING BACK his arrest warrants several times to make sure they were actually above board, he STILL had no legal basis that he could find to refuse to go to Sweden or to skip bail. That's game over. And the bail things makes him a direct, provable criminal, in the UK for no other reason than breaching a court order requiring bail. You can *disagree* with the court, but you cannot avoid the law because of that. That's why the bail should have been spent on smarter lawyers (who probably would have said "shut up and hand yourself in, you idiot") rather than him not doing a runner.

    5. Anonymous C0ward

      Re: He's the first person...

      There is of course the suggestion that the UK would be much more likely to hand him over to the US than Sweden would.

    6. Scorchio!!

      Re: He's the first person...

      It is not an extradition warrant for questioning; the Swedish procedure is to pull the suspect in, interview them and give them a chance to say their part, then charge them. The Swedish police wanted to charge him, they told his Swedish lawyer who denied in court that they'd been in touch, and then withdrew the denial (again, in court) agreeing they'd been in touch. Even if I were a charitable man I'd have to say the lawyer alerted Assange to the proximity of arrest and that Assange flew the country, that there was no coincidence, and the Swedish bar appears to have held the same view, as indicated by their desire to speak to said lawyer.

      1. Lee Dowling Silver badge

        Re: He's the first person...

        If a lawyer alerts their client to a possible arrest pending, and they then flee on the basis of that information, I instantly lose all sympathy for both the lawyer and the client.

        The whole conspiracy theory rests on the idea that Assange is SO vital to the Americans that they would encourage and gain the support of multiple, independent nation states just to get hold of him, even risking illegal arrest in those countries by the countries own police forces (overseen by the EU).

        Or they could have just extradited him direct from the UK.

        If anything, it makes the US look even more powerless than necessary, because they haven't managed to do ANYTHING yet and the "link" between the US and Sweden has been broadcast all over the news.

        Seriously, if they *really* wanted him, we'd have handed him over long ago. The still haven't managed to try Manning properly yet, the person who thought Assange was his "friend" (with friends like that, who need enemies like the US?), because of their own internal legal wranglings and he DEFINITELY did something wrong and in military service which is a whole different ball game under the law. Given that the US are still detaining people without trial in a foreign country over 10 years after their alleged crimes, that the US are trying to impose their laws on foreign countries to the points of dawn raids with property seizure with zero legal basis (MegaUpload, etc.), Assange has got off extremely, extremely, extremely lightly if they really wanted him.

        Or, he's just a narcissistic moron.

        1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
          Happy

          Re: Re: He's the first person...

          "....they haven't managed to do ANYTHING yet...." Well, they haven't NEEDED to do anything yet. Apart from laugh. A$$nut has been happily destroying his own rep and credibility. As I've posted before, we need to see what information regrading the pre-leak communications between Manning and A$$nut comes out of Manning's trial, and then what type of deal he cuts with the US authorities to help them gut A$$nut. Manning is the stepping stone to A$$nut, and whilst he's locked himself away in the Ecuadorean "hellhole with no light or fresh air (whimper)" they don't exactly have to run very far to find him.

  31. Tank boy
    Facepalm

    Poor Julian.

    Perhaps America could provide him with more sunny accommodations. Plenty of it in Cuba.

  32. Psyx

    He can always go outside for a walk.

    Ironically, he'd have got time outside in jail... and would have been released by now, to boot.

  33. ratfox
    Meh

    Hi health "could get worse at any moment"?

    Well, yeah, obviously… Everybody's health could get worse at any moment. I have a cold, for instance.

  34. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Will ASSange die from radiation poisoning?

    It would not be surprised if ASSange were to die from radiation poisoning courtesy of the KGB, as others in the past have.

  35. Nick Davey
    Happy

    Um...

    I saw this on Sky news this morning and thought "I guess he feels like he hasn't been in the news recently." This does smack of the fact that he wants to remind everyone he's still here despite the fact that 99.999% of the world's population can get on fine without him.

  36. Imsimil Berati-Lahn
    IT Angle

    Publicity whore needs to score.

    Pretty much everybody had forgotten about him.

    No tabloid inches. Not even tabloid milimetres.

    Hey! I know! Let's do a press release to let everyone know I'm still here.

    What's the angle?

    Oh, I don't know... Tell 'em I've got a cold. No, wait... call it a chest infection. Sounds more dramatic.

    Later: Daily feature in the Mirror: Julian's stools. Thursday 6th Dec: Soft, umber, hint of corn-chips.

    They'll print any old shit.

    1. Fred Flintstone Gold badge

      Re: Publicity whore needs to score.

      Daily feature in the Mirror: Julian's stools. (..)

      They'll print any old shit.

      .. but I repeat myself..

  37. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Nothing ventured.

    Nothing gained.

    It's not rocket science.

  38. Matt Bryant Silver badge
    Stop

    Yeah, he's just so ill!

    Except this clip of him spewing his usual bile and garbage at the BBC has no coughing, no shortage of breath, and no shortage of male bovine manure (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-20563539). What a lying little egomaniac.

    1. Local G
      Linux

      Re: I'm Doctor Matthew Bryant

      and I'm a diplomate at over 200 medical schools from Las Vegas to Bangkok. I can diagnose anybody by watching a BBC video of them on my flat screen tv with Bose speakers. I do some forensic work now and then, but that's none of your business. Move along.

      1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
        FAIL

        Re: Re: I'm Doctor Matthew Bryant

        ".....I can diagnose anybody by watching a BBC video of them....." Local Dupe, it's very obvious he neither looks at all ill or suffering, and has none of the symptoms associated with a "chronic lung infection". Oh, sorry, couldn't you see that from you position with your head up his ar$e? Please do keep on posting prime examples of the blind and unquestioning support of The Faithful.

        1. Local G
          Happy

          Re: Mucho apologies, Doc.

          You probably guessed I was trying to co opt your hubristic humor and failed miserably.

          No one comes close to your inimitable egocentrism besides Dr Spock. And Julian Assange.

          1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
            Stop

            Re: Re: Mucho apologies, Doc.

            OK, do you see any indications of a chronic lung infection during St Jules's rant? There is no coughing, no obvious shortness of breath, no pale and pasty complexion, no problem in shouting down the interviewer. In short, he looks the picture of untroubled health. A$$nut caught out in another lie by his overwhelming ego.

            1. Local G
              Happy

              Re: Mucho apologies, Doc.

              When I was in medical school, Matt, I was taught that in order to get a complete diagnosis, the patient had to turn his head to the wall and cough whilst the physician gently squeezed his scrotum. And all the time the doctor repeated "Nosferatu" to himself to avoid getting a boner.

              I will be very glad to accompany you to the Ecuadorian Embassy any time , and say "Nosferatu" over and over while making vampire-like gestures around the room while you give Assange's balls a once over. This should keep your blood out of that naughty place as you check his nuts for any signs of malingering :o)

              1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
                Stop

                Re: Re: Mucho apologies, Doc.

                Dude, this is the thread on Assange's claims of ill-health due to his self-imposed incarceration in the Ecuadorean embassy, not "share your homoerotic celebrity fantasies". I didn't attend medical school but I'm pretty sure I wouldn't check for a lung infection by examining someone's crotch. I suspect your addiction to mind-altering "medicine" may have stopped you graduating med school!

                Oh, and - SCHWING! Don't try avoiding the fact that A$$nut is very obviously faking his "illness" for the Faithful. Do you claim he looks ill in the BBC vid? When he ends up in a Swedish court a proveable history of lying will not help his defence.

                1. Local G
                  Unhappy

                  It's my Tourettes, Matt. I'd never say anything to annoy you.

                  "A person with a god complex may refuse to admit the possibility of error or failure, even in the face of complex or intractable problems or difficult or impossible tasks, or may regard personal opinions as unquestionably correct."

                  "may regard personal opinions as unquestionably correct."

                  Sound like anybody you know Matt? Or anybody whose teeth you brush?

                  1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
                    Thumb Down

                    Re: It's my Tourettes, Matt. I'd never say anything to annoy you.

                    You'd never say anything of any sense when you're so busy dodging the issue.

                    1. Local G
                      Meh

                      Okay, Matt, I'll add my two cents to your silly subject.

                      "A lack of sunshine and living "in a confined space" has given Assange a chronic lung infection, apparently." (elReg)

                      Is Assange's lung infection chronic or acute? Is it a long developing syndrome or was it sudden in onset?

                      " this is the thread on Assange's claims of ill-health due to his self-imposed incarceration in the Ecuadorean embassy," (Matt Bryant)

                      Did Assange actually claim ill-health or was that claim made by others?

                      "Ecuador backtracks on Assange's health"

                      From: AFP THE AUSTRALIAN November 30, 2012 8:10AM

                      "Britain's Foreign Office confirmed the Ecuadorian government had not told them that Mr Assange was ill."

                      "ECUADOR'S embassy in London has published a clarification about the health of WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange, who has been living there for five months, saying there is no urgent problem

                      "They have raised concerns about what might happen should Mr Assange require medical care, including when their Foreign Minister saw the Foreign Secretary on 27 September," said the ministry statement."

                      http://www.theaustralian.com.au/in-depth/wikileaks/ecuador-backtracks-on-assanges-health/story-fn775xjq-1226527201761

                      Is this better? Or still too much regurgitation? Shouldn't somebody print a retraction?

                      1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
                        FAIL

                        Re: Okay, Matt, I'll add my two cents to your silly subject.

                        "....Shouldn't somebody print a retraction?" You should stop posting such easily debunkable tosh. It was the Ecuadoreans themselves that claimed A$$nut had a "chronic lung infection" in the first place:

                        http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-20539519

                        1. Local G

                          Re: Okay, Matt, I'll add my two cents to your silly subject.

                          My point was that Assange never made the claims you accused him of. :-(

                          1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
                            Facepalm

                            Re: Re: Okay, Matt, I'll add my two cents to your silly subject.

                            "My point was that Assange never made the claims you accused him of. :-(". Yes, I too desperately want to pretend the Twitto from Quito, Ana Albán Mora, came up with this one herself, and that in no way was the Holy St Jules involved in another piece of dishonesty. Oh, hold on a sec - no I don't because A$$ nut has lied so often and this is very obviously another one of his attention-seeking, lying stunts.

                            1. Local G
                              Boffin

                              Re: Hold on a sec, Dudeface.

                              Are you're saying that you believe people you like, and you don't believe people you don't like? That's the definition of a simpleton.

                              1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
                                FAIL

                                Re: Re: Hold on a sec, Dudeface.

                                "....you're saying that you believe people you like, and you don't believe people you don't like?...." Nope, I am simply saying A$$nut's previous history of lying, plus his obvious lack of any symptoms of the claimed illness, makes him much less likely to be believable now. And you are my definition of a simpleton for your blinkered acceptance of any utterance that comes out of the rectum of your Holy St Jules, hence my reference to you as Local Dupe.

                                1. Local G
                                  Trollface

                                  Re: "you are my definition of a simpleton."

                                  Local Dupe: "You are a simpleton."

                                  Dude Face: "You are a simpleton."

                                  Local Dupe: "Your mother wears army boots."

                                  Gee, I wonder what killer comeback Dude Face will respond with?

                                  1. Matt Bryant Silver badge
                                    Facepalm

                                    Re: Re: "you are my definition of a simpleton."

                                    "....Gee, I wonder what killer comeback Dude Face will respond with?" SCHWING! And because you are losing again. Says it all, really.

                                    Meanwhile, reports are coming in that the "sickly" rectum of St Jules has announced his buttcheekiness will be standing for Australian Senate in 2013 (http://www.newkerala.com/news/newsplus/worldnews-116359.html#.UMjS_qzj7rQ). Unfortunately, no-one remembered to tell A$$nut that being an Oz senator does not give automatic immunity from UK prosecution nor protection from extradition to Sweden. Good luck running that campaign from the Ecuadorean Embassy! That's if his "chronic lung infection" hasn't finished him off by then (we can only hope!).

                                    1. This post has been deleted by its author

                                    2. Local G
                                      Happy

                                      Re: " SCHWING! ... because you are losing again."

                                      I never mind losing the little ones, DF, as long as I slam dunk the big ones.

                                      (LG carves another notch into the buttstock of his Kalashnikov. He finds a pulse in DF's neck, so he calls the medics and climbs into a taxi to hunt for another denigrator of American war heroes.) :o)

  39. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'll bet this is a scam to sneak him out the back...

    ...while the media is photographing a decoy sunning on the balcony.

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