back to article From Dr No to Skyfall: The Reg's one month of Bond

It’s 1962 and John F Kennedy and Nikita Khrushchev are facing off over nuclear missiles in Cuba while Telstar bounces the first satellite transmission through space. Meanwhile, James Bond is making his cinematic debut in Dr No in London, with Sean Connery bringing Ian Fleming’s naval officer turned secret agent from book to …

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  1. Wupspups

    Excellent Mr Bond.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Was a plot to take out Silicon Valley realistic?

    Spoiler alert - the villain is a patent lawyer

  3. Stacy
    Happy

    Surely that should be...

    Physics of a Vodka Martini!

    Even Dr No knew to make Bonds Martini with vodka rather than the traditional gin. (Because of course Bond is such a secret agent that everyone knows his favorite tipple :p)

    1. NogginTheNog
      Coat

      Re: Surely that should be...

      Well if you're going to be THAT picky then how come he ALWAYS uses his real name?!

      I was going to quote "You expect me to talk??" from Goldfinger, but hey EVERYONE knows that! So I'll kick off the debate as to who's the best Bond: for me it's:

      1. Daniel Craig

      2. Sean Connery

      3. Timothy Dalton

      4. Roger Moore

      5. All the others...

      1. Stacy
        Pint

        Re: Surely that should be...

        Have you tasted the difference :) As a lover of Vodka Martini I can say it's not picky if it's your drink :P

        Favorite Bonds...

        1) Pierce Brosnan

        2) Roger Moore (I grew up with him as Bond...)

        3) Tough one. It's a choice between Sean Connery, Daniel Craig or Timothy

        4) George Lazenby

        Though that doesn't mean I don't like the Australian - the ending to OHMSS makes him a very human bond...

        1. Chris 171

          Re: Surely that should be...

          He uses his real name cos he's harder than Chuck Norris!

          They may be cheese but I do like Bond.

          Connery & Moore will not be surpassed for me.

        2. adam payne

          Re: Surely that should be...

          Or maybe:

          1) Pierce Brosnan

          2) Sean Connery

          3) Daniel Craig

          4) Roger Moore

          5) George Lazenby

          6) Timothy Dalton

          1. Thomas 4
            Pint

            Re: Surely that should be...

            Hmmm...it's easier to evaluate them based on individual films rather than overall:

            1) Daniel Craig in Casino Royale

            2) Sean Connery in Goldfinger

            3) Pierce Brosnan in Goldeneye

            4) Roger Moore in Live And Let Die.

            1. big_D

              Re: Surely that should be...

              Nah, David Niven in Casino Royale was better than Daniel Craig.

          2. Euripides Pants

            Re: Surely that should be...

            1) David Niven

            2) All the rest are number two

        3. Ian 55
          Mushroom

          Re: Surely that should be...

          "I was the first actor to play James Bond... and the last" - a impressionist doing Connery, and getting it right.

      2. DF118
        Coffee/keyboard

        Re: Surely that should be...

        Dalton > Brosnan? Gimme a brek!

        Goldeneye opens with Bond bungee jumping off a dam hundreds of feet above a munitions factory, grappling on to the roof of said factory and breaking in with a laser torch. The first ever close up of Brosnan's Bond is as he knocks out a henchman with the line "sorry - forgot to knock".

        Dalton's first close up? Getting a fright. From a monkey.

        1. Stacy
          Happy

          Re: Surely that should be...

          Brosnan: Yes, a homage to Roger Moore type character with the one liner (and poor plot!). And just... Who could argure against Pierce?!?

          Dalton: I just thought he was one of the closest to the book character - who is, lets face it, a pretty cold killer!

          1. DF118

            @Stacy Re: Surely that should be...

            Sure, you can gauge how good any particular actor's Bond is/was by trying to discern which one gave gave the closest representation of Fleming's character, but that's like trying to decide what type of cheese to eat by asking which is closest in character to a house brick.

      3. Graham Bartlett

        Re: Surely that should be...

        +1, except I'd put Moore in the "All the others" category.

        Bond is a killer. Moore wasn't, and nor was Brosnan. Both of them were all gadgets and not much else, because they had nothing else going for them. The key thing about Bond as acted by Craig, Connery and Dalton is that although they have some cool gadgets, they're equally able to belt the crap out of someone with their bare hands. The only fight Moore's Bond ever properly won was with two girls, which says everything you need to know.

        Also those guys were/are happy to be doing it themselves instead of relying on stand-ins. In "The Living Daylights", there's a fight on a Jeep. That's actually Dalton hanging off the roof by his fingers at 50mph on a mountain road, not some stuntman.

        1. Thomas 4

          @Graham

          I can see what you're saying about Brosnan, especially in the very sub par The World Is Not Enough. At the beginning of Goldeneye though, the scene with the power plant, he does have a fair amount of his old ruthlessness, given that he was willing to blow up his fellow agent in order to complete the mission, not to mention the scene where they're beating the crap out of each other on the radio transmitter.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Headmaster

      Physics of a Vodka Martini!

      Has anyone ever added up the amount of alcohol Bond is supposed to have imbibed over the decades ?

      --

      imbibedpast participle, past tense of im·bibe (Verb)

      Verb:

      Drink (alcohol).

      Absorb or assimilate (ideas or knowledge): "propaganda you imbibed in your youth".

  4. FartingHippo
    Stop

    MIssing article

    Most impossible Bond gadget. Number one contender must surely be the invisible Aston Martin. Another good (i.e. bad) effort was the magnetic watch which can attract a metal boat from 10 metres. Underwater and flying cars not in the mix as they actually built them for real :)

    1. Matt_payne666

      Re: MIssing article

      Well the invisible car is in existence - sort of... an LCD cloth panel if I remember, using cameras to capture the image behind it - Mercedes used it the other week on one of their electric or hybrid things at some vauge motor show I skimmed over....

      Id say the most impossible gadget would be the whole of moonraker, although Musk is doing a pretty good job of playing Drax at the moment... if only he'd bought a volcano instead of Texas!

      1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

        Re: MIssing article

        If you were Musk could you resist hiring Richard Keil (?) to accompany you to some event ?

      2. Julz

        Re: MIssing article

        Larry Ellison got the island.

    2. Cheekygeek

      Re: MIssing article

      I couldn't agree more. Cloaking I can get onboard with, especially if it isn't 100% perfect like that of a Predator, but completely invisible is just taking the piss and is unforgiveable in my book.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Thumb Down

        Re: MIssing article

        Exactly.

        Cloaking such that it vaguely camoflagues the car, LEDs on the bodywork can show the light obtained from the other side of the car, fine and doable with technology.

        But invisible as in the invisible man, such that transparent windows are not visible, car tyres and inside wheelarches / grilles are not visible, the snow on the car is not visible, the whole fully transparent thing ruined Die Another Day.

    3. davemcwish

      Re: MIssing article

      Agree with the invisible car (and John Cleese as Q). The elecromagnet watch and the wrist dart gun were the two small gadgets I liked the best as a kid (and would skill like as an adult)

    4. King Jack
      Trollface

      Re: MIssing article

      The grappling hook in the watch or belt. Totally impossible unless the cable is created on the fly like a spider's webbing.

    5. Graham Bartlett

      Re: MIssing article

      The invisible Aston Martin has to be top place, no question. I'm glad they stopped for a while after that, because they'd totally jumped the shark there.

      But I'd say second place would be the magic pen that let Roger Moore breathe underwater. Sure it's possible to engineer artificial gills to pull dissolved air out of seawater, but it'd be the size of a house.

      You could make a strong case for the laser rifles in Moonraker though, I guess, but that's pretty much narrative imperative when the film went all space opera.

  5. Christian Berger

    Of course my favourite one has to be the 1967 version of Casino Royale

    you cannot make movies like this one any more.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSEmKXzpQMQ

    1. Ralph B

      Re: Of course my favourite one has to be the 1967 version of Casino Royale

      You wouldn't want to:

      - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7gGiSDrrBg

      1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
        Happy

        Re: Of course my favourite one has to be the 1967 version of Casino Royale

        'Who is this "le Chiffre"?'

        'Nobody knows, not even "le Chiffre"!!'

        1. Dave 126 Silver badge

          Re: Of course my favourite one has to be the 1967 version of Casino Royale

          "My doctor says I can't have bullets enter my body at any time"

          "Hello Sailor!"

          "Don't worry about that chair with a hole in the middle. It's merely waiting to be reupholstered."

  6. Martin
    Thumb Up

    But what about the books?

    I think there should be at least a nod to the books on which the films were based. (Only the Ian Fleming ones, though - all the others - at least the two or three that I've read - are pale imitations of the real thing).

    This is how Bond orders a martini in the first book, Casino Royale:-

    “A dry martini," he said. "One. In a deep champagne goblet." ...

    "Just a moment. Three measures of Gordon's, one of vodka, half a measure of Kina Lillet. Shake it very well until it's ice-cold, then add a large thin slice of lemon-peel. Got it?”

    1. Stacy
      Facepalm

      Re: But what about the books?

      See this is why you should read the books as well as watch the film :) (OK - why I should) I never realised his martinis in the film were based on gin!

      Hangs head in shame...

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: But what about the books?

      This is how Bond orders a martini in the first book, Casino Royale:-

      “A dry martini," he said. "One. In a deep champagne goblet." ...

      "Just a moment. Three measures of Gordon's, one of vodka, half a measure of Kina Lillet. Shake it very well until it's ice-cold, then add a large thin slice of lemon-peel. Got it?”

      And you should hear it read by Toby Stephens.

    3. ColonelClaw
      Thumb Up

      Re: But what about the books?

      That's an amazing Martini, and it is still served in the very bar where Fleming invented it - the cocktail bar at Dukes Hotel in St James. It's called the Vesper (after the character) and I would urge anyone who enjoys a real Martini to make a pilgrimage there to try for themselves. It is without question the finest, most delicious cocktail I have ever drank, and is made with loving care at your table by the expert staff. If you ask they will explain to you why they use specific ingredients and why Fleming designed it, an interesting story all in itself.

    4. Lusty

      Re: But what about the books?

      That's how Daniel Craig orders it in the new Casino Royale movie too :)

      1. Martin
        Happy

        Re: But what about the books?

        Really? OK, I'll take your word for it.

        My only memory of a martini order in the new film was something like this:-

        "Dry martini, please"

        "Shaken or stirred?"

        "Do I look as if I give a damn?"

        1. Gazareth

          Re: But what about the books?

          Yeah, that got a laugh in the cinema.

          He orders the drink as described above near the start of the card game.

          There's a moment of quiet reflection, then most of the rest of the players order one too. Le Chiffre is a little wound up by this.

  7. Manolo
    Headmaster

    Dwarf?

    OK, she's no six foot, but she's taller than Tom Cruise:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pi4gVq7zsTU

  8. vonBureck
    Devil

    You must mean Physics of Heineken advertising?

    There, fixed that one for you.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: You must mean Physics of Heineken advertising?

      Physics of bmw/ford group/sony/walther/omega advertising?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: You must mean Physics of Heineken advertising?

        How did you forget Aston Martin?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: You must mean Physics of Heineken advertising?

          Once upon a time, Aston Martin was more or less part of the narrative. An uncredited cast member.

          When the Brosnan era came to start in the 90s, bmw paid for product placement with an Aston DB5 more or less having a cameo role.

          Towards the end of the 90s, they were part of Ford group, so in the likes of Die Another Day everyone had a Range Rover / Jag / Ford (Halle Berrys Thunderbird!)

          Craig was even spotted in a Mondeo and Fiesta.

          Quantum of Solace, the Aston was more or less cameo again as he took on baddies in surprisingly good looking Alfa Romeos.

          They're owned by Tata now, who may or may not be able to pay for full product placement.

          The thing is, Aston is like Vodka Martini. It is Bond (yes yes, he had a Bentley in the books, but they were rehased Rolls Royces and now expensive Phaetons and soon a blinged up vw Toerag). It is not obvious product placement, whereas the bmws and fords were/are.

          Driving around in a Ford, tapping at a Sony Vaiaaiaoaiaoaio, drinking Heineken in his boxers.

          He might as well be some junior clerk.

          Aston, Martini, Monaco. The Bond trilogy.

    2. Kubla Cant
      Facepalm

      Re: You must mean Physics of Heineken advertising?

      According to last night's Standard, the latest film includes a scene where Bond is drinking Heineken, from the bottle, in bed.

      Short of having him watching daytime TV in his pants while eating cold takeaway from the carton, I can't think of anything less cool.

  9. JOKM
    WTF?

    Great

    An article whose entire content boils down to 'we are going to write some articles'

    1. TheOtherHobbes

      So, we meet again

      Mr Advertorial.

  10. Jim 59

    james.bond@internationalexport.com

    Connery, obviously

    Moore and Brosnan bubbling under.

    1. Jim 59

      Correction

      james.bond@universalexport.com

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Devil

    From Dr No to Austin Powers ..

    > It’s 1962 and John F Kennedy and Nikita Khrushchev are facing off over nuclear missiles in Cuba while Telstar bounces the first satellite transmission through space.

    At the time there was a real British film industry, with such films as `The Spy Who Came in from the Cold' which depicted the spy world as it really was. With the Bond franchise what they did was feed a totally bogus fantasy to the American market. See also U-571 where Harvey Keitel captures an Enigma machine from a nazi submarine. And The Bridge on the River Kwai where William Holden helps Colonel Nicholson to blow up the bridge ...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: From Dr No to Austin Powers ..

      Churchill: The Hollywood years sends up this sensationalist revisionist filmmaking in a slightly silly but watchable with a beer format.

  12. Gerhard den Hollander
    Thumb Up

    bond bike

    Ok, so it's not james, but mario,

    but it's a nice piece of cinematic, and everyone who wants to make a bike commercial should watch this.

    It's got bond, babes, a villain with an accent to match the french taunter, product placement galore, millionaires, gadgets and a bike

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5lKRxk7uq8U

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: bond bike

      the above Bond Bike film is reminiscent of those BMW adverts, each about ten minutes long and directed by the likes of Ang Lee, Guy Ritchie and Tony Scott, presented as a short story. The Tony Scott one with Gary Oldman and James Brown is a cracker.

      The Guy Ritchie one features Clive Owen in a very Bond-like role, humiliating a version of Mr Ritchie's ex wife, played by herself.

  13. Dave Pickles

    Obligatory xkcd link

    http://xkcd.com/123/

  14. Why Not?

    In the novel Moonraker, it is noted in the card club Blades, Bond adds a single pinch of black pepper to his glass of vodka, much to M's consternation; he claims it sinks all the poisons to the bottom.

    actually very good, improves ropey vodka.

    Craig & Lazenby seem the most human Bonds, Dalton made a good stab at it but he always strikes me as smug not sure why.

    But Connery & Roger Moore's eyebrow always stole the show.

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      It wasn't poisons added by nefarious enemy agents, but by products of dodgy Soviet distillation. The episode suggests Bond has had experience in that part of the world.

      1. Thomas 4

        A monstorous commie plot

        Maybe bond adds the peppercorns to get rid of the fluoride content of the vodka. It's in children's ice cream after all...

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Dalton? Dalton probably had the most immortal of lines to utter; "More of a problem eliminator", and the look on his face was spot on.

  15. jai
    Thumb Up

    and this is why El Reg is the best tech website i read :)

  16. Lone Gunman
    Thumb Up

    Fantastic! This will definitely make my month

    Reg - any chance of doing an article on Fleming and his ties to Bletchley Park? There's some fascinating stories there that outstrip anything that Bond gets up to.

    Favourite bonds .... hmmmm .....

    Connery

    Craig

    Bosnon

    Moore

    Dalton

    Shocked no one has mentioned Moneypenny yet or any of the Bond girls. Pussy Galore anyone?

  17. This post has been deleted by its author

  18. David Pollard
    Meh

    42 comments ...

    ... and still no mention of Dame Judi Dench. I must be getting older.

  19. Herby

    Instead of rating various Bond's

    How about rating the films themselves. There are a few.

    Another rating is the supporting characters played by various people.

    Note that the original Felix was played by Jack Lord (Hawaii 5-0 fame).

    Of course nothing beats Desmond Lewellen [sp?] as Q

    1. Alister

      Re: Instead of rating various Bond's

      >>Of course nothing beats Desmond Lewellen [sp?] as Q

      Not enough "L"s

      Llewellan

      It's a Welllllsh name, and therefore must inclllllllude lllllllots of lllllllllls, lllook you!

      1. Alister
        Unhappy

        Re: Instead of rating various Bond's

        Bugger, still can't spell it right:

        Llewelyn

      2. Dave Walker

        Re: Instead of rating various Bond's

        That made me Llaugh out Lloud!

    2. King Jack

      Re: Instead of rating various Bond's

      Q should have been pensioned off years ago. Q should be about the same age as Bond, not a pensioner. All the characters changed except him until his death. But I'll give in and say he was much better than Cleese.

  20. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    2 pages and no best bond babes??

    Martinis? Cars? Gadgets? Aren't we forgetting something else about Bond? :)

  21. Ian 55

    Best films

    Diamonds Are Forever - best Blofeld

    Goldfinger - everyone at their best

    From Russia With Love - before the gadgets

    Live and Let Die - Moore's only really good one

    Casino Royale (21st Century version) - how to do a remake

    You Only Live Twice - I want a gyrocopter, please

    OHMSS - if only Connery had done it...

    Never Say Never Again - a better Thunderball than Thunderball

    Casino Royale (1960s version) - bits of it

    .. all the rest.

    The worst? I stopped watching the Moores after The Spy Who Loved Me. The comparison with the same year's Raiders of the Lost Ark was just embarrassing.

  22. Roger Kynaston
    Happy

    Cool

    Never been able to bond (Coat please!) with David Craig. Grew up with Roger Moore and liked Pierce Brosnan the most. Silly films should have humour and I think he brought good humour to it.

    Tried a vodka martini once but prefer the traditional gin one. However, we do shake rather than stir them - I like the way the broken ice dilutes it slightly and in a very unscientific way I reckon the air being mixed in improves the flavour. I await the downvotes from purists

    When are we likely to get a Jane Bond though? Might be interesting.

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