back to article iPhone queue ‘superficial and pretentious’ says queuing fangirl

Apple Stores have started selling the iPhone 5 in Australia, the country where this kind of thing happens first thanks to accidents of geography and the location of the International Date Line. Your correspondent was there and can report that, in the suburban store he visited, the sale was an orderly affair. Our first …

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  1. MIc
    Coat

    I'd hit it

    that is all

    1. HMB

      Re: I'd hit it

      Going by the older one, you'd need to make sure you had protection on it first otherwise it's going to end badly.

      1. Magnus_Pym

        Re: I'd hit it

        Geek girl alert. The blogoshere may approach melt down in the next few days. There is probably already a fan page for her. Mind you she is quite cute.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: I'd hit it

          We need a side by side photo page to compare with with the Asus eee girl......Oh I am having good thoughts now.....I better go and have a cool beer quickly to calm down.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I'd pound that

      I'd like to see Amy in her Nurses outfit and some black stockings, plz.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I'd hit it

      Are you dry-humping your office desk, or does every photo of a woman under the age of 25 elicit this response?

      1. David Neil
        Trollface

        Re: I'd hit it

        I'd say about 80% of the 18-25 age bracket, can't speak for the OP though

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      Re: I'd hit it

      LOL - Fancy that - people masturbating over the phone, without any porn on it.

      Damn - must be a "Really Great" phone.

      Stick to my cheapy basic mobile - cause I want to make calls more that I want to wank over it / wank with it.

  2. Field Marshal Von Krakenfart

    Yawn...

    At least they only queued from the night before unlike the iDiots in NY queuing up for 8 days. I assume that there are less obsessive compulsives in Oz, after all it's only a fucking phone, owning one isn't going to change your life.

    1. David Webb

      Re: Yawn...

      But there is a chance media will interview you and you'll be in the papers or on the TV or something!

      1. Jedit
        Devil

        "But there is a chance media will interview you "

        Well, I suppose everyone knowing you're an idiot will change your life, but perhaps not in the way you might have hoped.

        (Note: this sentiment applies to anyone who queues for days for anything, not just to iPhone buyers.)

    2. Oengus
      Joke

      Re: Yawn...

      That was the Broadway store... That Apple Store is inside the shopping centre and Centre management wouldn't allow the queueing inside the store.

      At the "Standalone" Apple store in the centre of Sydney people had been queueing since last weekend. We have the same fanboi idiots here that they have in the US.

      Joke icon because it is the iPhone5 the biggest joke played on the fanbois yet.

      1. wowfood
        Joke

        Re: Yawn...

        And here I thought they weren't queuing up for several days because the people of oz have such short attention spans. Then again, the iPhone is pretty shiny.

        1. Stanislaw
          Headmaster

          Re: Yawn...

          "there are less obsessive compulsives in Oz"

          Should be, "there are fewer obsessive compulsives in Oz"

          Pardon me, I have to go and shout at the pigeons in the park now.

          1. Field Marshal Von Krakenfart
            Headmaster

            Re: Yawn...

            @Stanislaw

            No, I think I am right to use 'less' in this instance, less is used when referring to something that can’t be counted or doesn’t have a plural, to quote Albert Einstein “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”, since the level of stupidity is infinite, and we are talking about the iDiots, it is uncountable and therefore 'less' is the correct comparative to use (or is it a superlative?)

            I'd also like to offer you my most enthusiastic contrafibularities for the helping me to get learned gooder English like what it ought to be spoke and embiggening my vocabularly.

            1. Severen
              FAIL

              Re: Yawn...

              "less is used when referring to something that can’t be counted or doesn’t have a plural"

              "obsessive compulsives"

              1. Swarthy Silver badge

                Re: Yawn...

                Or is it that the compulsives are less obsessive?

            2. Stanislaw
              Pint

              Re: Yawn...

              @ Field Marshal Von Krakenfart

              Your proposition concerning the infinitude and consequent indivisibility of human idiocy is an exquisitely handsome example of the genre, and I salute it thus!

              1. Field Marshal Von Krakenfart
                Coffee/keyboard

                Re: Yawn...

                Stanislaw, see icon

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Yawn...

      "owning one isn't going to change your life."

      But it will!!! My very soul needs validation from such things. Oh God please, someone define me, I am so vacuous without such affectations!

  3. petrosy
    Facepalm

    iPhone owns Australia

    Travelling on public transport one can clearly see that Apple owns Australia. Every douche and his dog owns an iPhone.

    Having said that.... Aussie is always a few yearss behind the curve and I reckon this will change.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: iPhone owns Australia

      And if you went but what I see flying business class you'd think Blackberry still had 60% of the market.

  4. Johnny Canuck
    Megaphone

    God I hate that phoney corporate team crap.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "There's no I in team! Am I right..I mean, err...WE mean WE are right, yeah!"

      1. Isendel Steel
        Coat

        There' s no I in team...

        ...but there is a ME

      2. Severen
        Thumb Up

        "There's no I in team!"

        But there are two in idiot. :-D

        1. Swarthy Silver badge

          "There's no 'I' in TEAM"

          There is also no 'F' in WAY.

    2. Steven Roper
      Thumb Up

      Yep

      We all work together, we're one big happy family here, we're a TEAM!

      Until your job gets outsourced to some third world shithole for a tenth of your wage, then it's "there's the fucking door sunshine, security will escort you off the premises to make sure you don't fuck with the computers."

      Absolutely, Johnny. That shit makes me sick too.

      1. Field Marshal Von Krakenfart
        Linux

        Re: Yep

        TEAM; Technically Excellent Android Mobile

    3. Anonymous Coward 15

      There's no I in TEAM

      But there's a U in MUPPET

  5. Eddy Ito
    Paris Hilton

    'wants a phone that works'

    Does Amy actually know what a phone does? What will she do after the Zombacalypse when the only phones that work have a rotary dial and a cord? I suppose the zombies will enjoy a light snack.

    What, no zombie icon?

    1. Piro Silver badge

      Re: 'wants a phone that works'

      If you want a phone that works, your choice has always been cheap dumbphone, such as a Nokia with a goddamn monochrome screen and lasts for weeks.

      I would definitely not say you need to spend hundreds on an iPhone 5 to achieve working calls, or are people really that stup... don't answer that, of course, she was waiting in a long line to buy a phone.

      1. Psyx
        Stop

        Re: 'wants a phone that works'

        "If you want a phone that works, your choice has always been cheap dumbphone, such as a Nokia with a goddamn monochrome screen and lasts for weeks."

        Don't be so literal.

        A 'phone that works' means 'A phone that I can easily use the full functionality of'. That is what Apple do: They make phones that any feul can use. That is why they sell to masses of people who otherwise are often very non-technical: They are simple to operate and require no faffing.

        It's not my cup of tea, but that's a major contributing factor to their popularity. It's like the difference between stereo with a hundred buttons and twiddly bits and one with an 'on' and a volume button. Some people don't want to fiddle: They want a simple experience.

      2. Bronek Kozicki
        Thumb Up

        Re: 'wants a phone that works'

        Battery in BlackBerry Bold 9790 lasts for a week, if one is using it only for few calls and not much else. Same battery as 9900 but slower (i.e. frugal) CPU. It's also briliant at texting (thanks to proper keyboard) and the reception is good, as are other traditional phone qualities like switching calls, contact book or phone log. So I would say, (some) BlackBerries work great as a phone.

        Of course some will grumble about poor choice of apps in RIM store or imminent death of the platform, but it is not app store, or platform, which makes great phone (unless you own an iPhone).

        1. Danny 14 Silver badge

          Re: 'wants a phone that works'

          iphones are not my cup of tea either but i recommended one for my dad because again, it just works. He doesnt want to do things outside the box but he does understand the internet, email and taking photos and videos. It is easy for him to use his phone and mac and can do everything he wants on them both.

          I personally dont like the extra expense or walled garden approach but I can appreciate her sentiment.

          1. mikeyboosh

            Re: 'wants a phone that works'

            I hear this a lot, but I find that Android on ICS and above is very easy to use, as does my not-really-technical-i-just want-to-send-a-text-and-check-facebook girlfriend.This was maybe not the case a few years ago but I think times have changed.

            I'm sure I read a study once which compared how a 'virgin' user would perform tasks on iOS and Android, and I think it was really close. They measured things like hunting around to find the correct button etc.

          2. DaeDaLuS_015
            FAIL

            Re: 'wants a phone that works'

            I find the amount of comments for these articles from people who want to defend apple whilst distancing themselves from their products to be most amusing, keep them up.

            Infact I may even write my own.

            "Yes but you have to remember this is what Apple do well, they make functionality easily accessible to the masses, whilst not my sort of thing and i would never own one i can understand the appeal."

            Priceless.

    2. Heathroi
      Unhappy

      Re: 'wants a phone that works'

      oh so thats how the undead track the living so effectively, use of a radio network. or is it because the living tend to be noisy and loud.

  6. frank ly

    Happy shiny people all around

    " ...it is pleasingly light, so much so that an Apple Store staffer joked it may be disconcertingly so."

    He was then taken into a back room by two black shirted staff, for re-education and attitude adjustment.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Happy shiny people all around

      " ...it is pleasingly light, so much so that an Apple Store staffer joked it may be disconcertingly so."

      Think I may be an exception to the norm but I don't like ultrathin/ultralight mobiles so I'd probably agree with this Apple store bod.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    All Froth

    Well done to the coffee shop, I trust they sold the right coffee, all froth and no substance.

    Now what would that match?

  8. Sir Barry

    I am getting sick and tired of these 'news' stories regarding Apple and their products.

    When Apple create a product that cures cancer, then write about it.

    1. teebie

      too soon

    2. minky

      "When Apple create a product that cures cancer, then write about it."

      The Chuck Norris Phone has an app for that.

  9. Richard Ball

    Nowt

    so daft as folk

    1. jake Silver badge

      Re: Nowt

      My grandfather made it plural ... "Nowt daft as folks".

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Nowt

        Folk is a plural, surely?

        1. jake Silver badge

          Re: Nowt

          Of course "folk" is plural. I was just reporting Granpa's variation on the theme :-)

          See: http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/containing/539779

          (Pardon the "ou" muscle memory in "Yourkshire. Ta)

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Scary

    Just listened to the BBC World Service 'reporting' from the queue at the Regent street shop. Some seriously fucking scary people there including one who flew from Sweden to London to buy his iHit, apparently to show his thanks to Apple for blah, blah blah. Scary, scary shit. Like the Borg after a collective Masters at a version of the Royal College of Art where they only admitted people under six years old and closed down the Union bar.

    I've owned a dozen Macs, even have an iPad, but if I ever end up like that, someone please shoot me.

  11. mr_spigot
    Devil

    Priorities

    So many students preferring to spend their hard earned (???) on tech, not ale. What have we spawned....

    1. Danny 14 Silver badge

      Re: Priorities

      Ale is just as expensive. I bet you dont get 20p a pint promotions in the union bars anymore. In fact do union bars exist now?

    2. John Sturdy
      Joke

      Re: Priorities

      Apple? Ale? It's called cider.

  12. Sir Runcible Spoon

    Sir

    When these twatty students eventually venture out into the real world and out from under the umbrella of parent sponsored roofing, they will find they cannot afford a deposit on a house.

    Then I'm sure they won't be thinking 'If only I hadn't spunked $1200 on two phones'. No, I'm sure they'll be thinking 'Wow, why do deposits need to be so huge, what will the government do about it?'. If they bought it on credit, they probably won't even realise that they helped cause the larger deposit situation in their own little way.

    1. Craig 12

      Re: Sir

      I heard a similar argument yesterday and I really think it's wrong. (Yesterday, young people couldn't afford mortgage deposits due to buying expensive laptops).

      Here in the UK, for an average house, you need £16,000 to £32,000 deposit. Any other purchases pale in comparison, credit or debit card.

      My wife and I earn well above average, and don't think we could have afforded our house if we didn't get on the ladder in the 0% deposit days.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Craig 12

        You aren't thinking correctly. Yes deposits are stupidly high now, however thinking 'this is only £100 here, £500 there' isn't going to get you anywhere. Thinking 'If I don't spend that £500 on something that I don't really need as I could use a much cheaper option, I can then put the money I save into a savings account' will probably in a few years let you reach the point where you do have enough money in that account for your deposit.

        1. Craig 12

          Re: Craig 12

          Thanks for telling me I'm not thinking correctly. You failed to put in any actual evidence or your thought process however.

          For starters, not buying £500 on VISA doesn't give you £500 to save.

          Let's say the average spend is £500, and people are spending it "here and there", it still no way gets to deposit levels. Someone would have to be "not-spending" / saving £500 for 5 years for a £30,000 deposit.

          No one is buying an iphone every month. I'm not sure anyone on the current average wage could save £500 a month; certainly not an individual.

      2. K
        WTF?

        Re: Sir - That is BULLSH*T

        This is crap!

        I recently brought a £250k house with a £12k deposit..

        Some banks will offer a mortgage with 5% deposit, on top of that there are literally dozens and dozens of schemes to help first time buyers. Either government backed, or actually assistance provided by the housing developers.

        1. Danny 14 Silver badge

          Re: Sir - That is BULLSH*T

          I bought a 60k house with a 10k deposit. Move to cumbria, cheap as owt up here :)

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Sir - That is BULLSH*T

          I recently brought a £250k house with a £12k deposit..

          The trouble is that a lot of people have so much debt, often from non-essential purchases, that they don't have enough disposable income to buy a place as too much of their income is tied up in servicing loans or credit cards. This is the price of a consumer culture and this bizarre belief in an ever expanding economy.

          1. mark 63 Silver badge
            WTF?

            Re: Sir - That is BULLSH*T

            i have no debt

            being a skilled IT peson i'm of course earning 4 k below what is apparently the national average.

            i'm the proud owner of a 1 bed bungalow. yay

            -------------

            its not the deposit thats the problem its making payments on a house worth 5 times your salary

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: Sir - That is BULLSH*T

              You should consider moving to Silicon Valley. There the IT people get paid more than everyone else.

              1. jake Silver badge

                Re: Sir - That is BULLSH*T

                Run-of-the-mill IT bods do NOT make much money in Silly Con Valley. Try US$33 to 40K/year with a 2 year ("AA") degree and 5 years in the business. IF you can find such a job. A decent[1] 650-750sqft one bedroom one bath apartment in Mountain View, Sunnyvale or Cupertino costs ~US$1400/month. Given our current tax rates, that doesn't leave a lot of room for beer. Or gas/petrol, for that matter.

                Systems engineers, system administrators & security administrators, on the other hand, with 6+ years of Uni and a handful of productive years in the business can pretty much write their own salary ...

                [1] "Decent" defined by me as "far enough from a freeway to get some sleep" and "has space & hookups for personal clothes washer & dryer"[2] and "not a slum"[3].

                [2] I will never understand[4] why people spend useless hours in laundromats when they can be productive when doing laundry at home ...

                [3] Yes, there are slum-lords in Silly Con Valley.

                [4] But then I don't understand the whole iFad thing, either ;-)

        3. Craig 12

          Re: Sir - That is BULLSH*T

          >> This is crap!

          >> I recently brought a £250k house with a £12k deposit..

          Nice attitude you got there, and no way is that an average case. My friend who recently bought a 120k house paid the same deposit. For a reasonable deal, 10%-20% is still average.

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Sir

        Here in the UK, for an average house, you need £16,000 to £32,000 deposit. Any other purchases pale in comparison, credit or debit card.

        I know family members with well in excess of £16,000 on their credit cards. They moan about not being able to buy a house, yet think nothing of spunking several grand a time on long haul foreign holidays, the latest technology or as a deposit on a new car every couple of years, since they see those as utterly essential to their quality of life. In comparison, I decided a home was a bit more essential. As a result I use a six year old computer I got as a freebie from work, drive a fifteen year old car and holiday closer to home. The computer allows me to do everything my relatives do (admittedly I don't play the latest games on it), the car gets me to work just as well as their shinier ones, and a holiday in Southern Europe gets me just as much sun as in the Far East.

        1. Ben Tasker Silver badge

          Re: Sir

          I use a six year old computer I got as a freebie from work, drive a fifteen year old car

          I'm much the same, except I just don't go on holiday (admittedly I have become something of a workaholic) but I still can't afford a deposit!

          I went overdrawn once a little while back and got hit with charges, which took me over the next month, and again... etc.

          I've no problem with going without the latest and greatest, but my ability to save was knackered by the bank until very, very recently. I know a lot of people who have high levels of debt, and mine pails in comparison, so I'd never worked out quite where all my money was going until I totted up the value of the charges. Sometimes the cards are stacked against you and it takes a while to sort out the resulting mess.

          Part of the problem now, from what I've seen (when we last moved I did look to see what kind of mortgage I can get) is that you just can't borrow enough from most lenders. The banks being more responsible has the knock-on effect of a lot of people not being able to borrow enough to actually afford a house (though it might just be prices in my area). Round here £60,000 might just get you a static caravan on a nice park, but won't get you much more than that.

          Back to the point, a house is pretty much top of my priorities list, but it's a long, long way off unless I or a family member come into a serious lump of money. The money that would have gone towards a deposit has instead lined the bank's pockets as a result of a blown head-gasket costing more than expected. Still c'est la vie, I try not to be bitter, it's not like the world owes me anything, with some luck my claim will be successful and I'll get at least some of that money back!

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Sir

            Or to put it bluntly you used money that wasnt yours and then complain about the consequences...

            1. Sir Runcible Spoon

              Re: Sir

              I think most people understand the issue, but to those who don't..

              I used to live in a council house. My first priority was always the rent and then the bills. Then it was fags and food. Times change and the fags are gone, but mortgage is still #1. then bills.

              Even though I now earn a decent rate as a contractor I wouldn't dream of blowing good money on a couple of glossy phones, like someone else said elsewhere I also drive a beaten up old car that is reliable, I don't go on expensive holidays, or if I do it's once every 5 years or so.

              I see people with i-Pads, i-Phones, expensive cars/clothes etc. and when I find out what they do for a living I wonder how on Earth they can afford it when I can't. The answer is that they can't.

              1. Sir Runcible Spoon

                Re: Sir

                "How are you supposed to save for a house deposit in this situation? Must be because they are twatty."

                My comments were aimed at students (or anyone really) prepared to pay a premium for the latest shiny, but then complain that they can't afford to get on the housing ladder and live at home until they are 40.

                Your comment referred to a group of people struggling becuase of high tuition fees.

                Two different things.

                1. Anonymous Coward
                  Anonymous Coward

                  Re: Sir

                  Even if you take the fees out of it, its still difficult to save anything as a student and do a good job at your course what with 0 income + 1000s of survival outgoings.

                  I agree with you about people wasting money on the latest shiny make things better and then complaining about not being able to save.

                  Still it takes years (3 or 4) to get on the housing ladder even if you do nothing (except for pay rent, transport to work and food) - which is what i'm doing.

              2. Field Marshal Von Krakenfart
                Paris Hilton

                Re: Sir, a point of clarification

                Then it was fags and food.

                For our USian friends, fags are things you put in your mouth and suck cigarettes.

                Paris, do I have to explain why?

            2. Ben Tasker Silver badge

              Re: Sir

              @AC 11:54

              When the 'consequences' are £1000's in charges (no exaggeration), then yeah I'm complaining. In one month, the bank took £500 (more than 75% of my wage at the time). As well as you budget, there are things that crop up that simply cannot be avoided (don't fix car, don't get to work, don't earn money - and no, there's no option of lift). Had a similar discussion with the bank at one point, they felt £5 disposable income was sufficient to mean you should never go overdrawn. What if I fall ill and have to pay a NHS prescription charge (£7.20) says I? If it's a cold, fine, shouldn't be wasting the doctors time. If I run out of the painkillers that make every day bearable? Hmmmm bit more tricky there, even the bank aren't quite willing to say "your disability, your problem).

              Going slightly over and getting charged a reasonable rate? fine. Going slightly over and then getting financially raped? not fine.

              As I said before, no issue with paying my debts and paying my way. I don't waste money on pointless shite (though I did make some poor decisions when I was younger), but all that's been happening is the bank have taken a substantial percentage of my wages each month, ensuring that the next month they'll be taking the same (or bigger).

              Incidentally, since I moved bank things have been gradually improving. I had to use my new overdraft to pay the debit balance on my old account, so still hit charges, but the new bank have proven it's possible to charge sensible amounts that don't risk driving you to financial ruin quite so much. Given the amount the old bank were taking (on average) each month, I'd have to have 30 payments bounce against the new account. So yeah, I blame the bank a bit given that their charging behaviour was bordering on abusive.

              They were far worse before the test case, but I'd stay they still fall short.

              Incidentally, I notice you don't seem to have the balls to put a name to your judgemental comment, so frankly fuck you and the horse you rode in on!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Sir

      er what about the young people that don't spend their money on rubbish yet still need to find a house deposit.

      E.g. undergrad course £9,000 a year x 3 years

      Postgraduate course £5,000

      Also students have to pay rent whilst they are studying, I paid about £4,000 a year x 3 years, 12k....

      Should students be working fulltime whilst doing a course to pay the rent? How can they complete their coursework the highest standards? At uni I saw people dedicated to uni (not having to work) 100% getting a first, those working part-time getting 2:1s and 2:2s.

      It is even more important you have the time to do the course properly now it costs £27k minimum.

      How are you supposed to save for a house deposit in this situation? Must be because they are twatty.

      Once you have graduated, the first couple of years you will need to rent, adding to the time it'll take to save a deposit.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Sir

        ..and even if you do work as well as do your degree that'll only pay for food, bills and books. Not enough for a house deposit.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    After watching the video,

    I'm left with one thought:

    Get a life!

  14. Kendo
    Thumb Down

    Weird

    Is it only me...or does the whole brain-washing of both the staff and the customers seem just a little creepy. Its like they had Derren Brown consulting on staff training techniques. The congratulatory hand-shaking for the first sad customers who queued took the biscuit.

    This hype is about a phone that isn't that great (to me anyway) with a marginally better-than-average app store.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Weird

      It's not brain washing - it's just a bit 'American' and to be honest ask yourself would you rather be greeted / served by someone who (at least appeared) happy to help / see you or someone sullen faced / who could not be ar$ed.

      The staff in Apple stores are typically all pretty friendly, helpful and knowledgable - makes a change to many similar stores you could go into.

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Weird

          I recently went into TGI Fridays for a beer and a burger.

          On someone else's table it was a birthday meal.

          The staff sang an overly enthusiastic song for somebody's birthday.

          It all seemed too fake and cringeworthy. Rachel off of friends off of office space sprang to mind.

          If it had been a local establishment, they'd have either quietly sent down an extra dessert (which I have had happen in a nice local restaurant) or grumpily not care (which seems to cover the local greasy spoons).

          I'd rather have genuineness than US-imported fakeness (yes, I know, I could've ate somewhere else etc)

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Weird

        I like staff to be friendly, but not so hyper that they appear to be on drugs...

      3. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Weird

        Its very superficial, if you try to engage with their bullshit they dont actually listen to anything you are saying.. its like they have a script of crap in their heads, just like phoning a call centre... give me someone normal any day!

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Trollface

    Sad Gits.

    Why do I now get the urge to walk into an Apple store and ask if they sell S3's?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Sad Gits.

      Because you enjoy being a bit of an objectionable twat?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Sad Gits.

      They would probably smile (as no doubt they have to deal with many other 'comedians') and I suspect would still be polite - you would probably walk out with a new iPhone. I've owned Samsung phones and other Android phones and in comparison they are junk and the service poor - I'm not being without a phone for a month again (Samsung) and to be sent a poor quality refurb.

      1. Ben Tasker Silver badge

        Re: Sad Gits.

        I've owned Samsung phones and other Android phones and in comparison they are junk

        Odd, the people I know who've moved from iOS to Android have said exactly the same thing about iPhones, though I suspect that Apple's customer service quality probably is higher. In an idealistic world, of course, you'd never need to interact with their support because the phone would be reliable and easy to use. Doesn't really hold true for anything in today's world though.

        My own experience has been of wanting to throw iPhones against the wall, but then I'm not really your typical use case. I guess I take certain functionality for granted, and when it's not present (or buried somewhere) it's very easy to discount the phone as shit. Still, if it works for you, great! We've got customers with iPhones and are expected to support them, so I'll never be free of the things, but at least I don't have to use one as my main phone.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Sad Gits. @AC, 9:46

        Unless you brought direct from Samsung, its the retailer you needed to talk to, I've been with Vodafone and had phone issues with a samsung I bricked doing an update, sent it off and had it returned fixed in 3 days

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Ordered mine - arrive at 5 past 9 this morning - no bother at all. Initial thoughts is that it's good it's the same width as fits my 'human' hands just find. It's slightly longer but does not look like much - extra row of icons a nice though. What you do get is how solid / well made it feels - considering it's got a bigger screen yet it's around 20% thinner and lighter - and it does feel a lot lighter when compared to a '4'.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Lightning connector is what Micro-USB should have been - no doubt soon to appear on a Samsung phone.

  18. Ketlan

    Ohmigod!!!

    " iPhone 5..."

    I DON'T FUCKING CARE!!!

  19. mark 63 Silver badge
    Trollface

    anyone queuing for more than 24 hours for a phone should be sterilised, although they probably wont be contributing to the gene pool anyway.

    1. Sir Runcible Spoon

      re: troll

      "anyone queuing for more than 24 hours for a phone should be sterilised, although they probably wont be contributing to the gene pool anyway."

      Fixed that for ya.

  20. Avatar of They
    Big Brother

    OMFG

    The 'cult of scientology' and 'Apple' are one and the same, what a very sad and wierd video that I can only assume brainwashing is involved or something to do with pay related to creepiness. But judging by the clenched fist recognition by the guys in the queues this is American and they lap it up.

    I always thought it was wierd in Apple, but that is just scary.

    'Big brother icon' because the cult of scientology will try and correct my posting no doubt.

    We either need a zombie icon to denote brainwashing or something defacing a picture of derren brown?

  21. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Here's An Idea

    If we all stopped commenting on iApple articles, perhaps The Register would stop promoting what it purports to despise.

    1. diodesign (Written by Reg staff) Silver badge

      Re: Here's An Idea

      Re: OsricTheGreat

      Says the guy with only 3 posts to date, hm? :-)

      C.

      1. Ben Tasker Silver badge

        Re: Here's An Idea

        As long as we're opening the article to read, and possibly clicking on Ads the stories will keep coming regardless of how many comments are posted.

        Personally, I find they give me some amusement. Whilst I'm not a fan of iStuff, I'm not rabidly against them. Helps me feel a little more balanced to see people tearing the shreds out of each other over a 'shiney'. Particularly important considering I'm probably quite unbalanced compared to most people I know.

        Yes, El Reg, you're doing me a Mental Health Service by continuing to fan flamewars, though if you want to go from NHS to BUPA level treatment you're going to have to supply me with popcorn!

  22. This post has been deleted by its author

  23. The Alpha Klutz
    Happy

    give me a high five homeboy

    we're so cool

  24. TimChuma
    Mushroom

    I've got a phone that works

    It's called a Nokia and does not break when I throw it after drinking when I am trying to make my SMS go faster.

  25. SkyFlyer
    Gimp

    I got one, I love it, and I wont sell it to you, get your own. No I didn't have to stand in a queue, yes I visited an Apple Store, no it has not changed my life significantly but it certainly has enhanced it a bit.

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