back to article Microsoft dumps Metro from Windows 8

Microsoft has dropped "Metro", the name given to the squaretastic user interface for Windows 8 and Windows Phone, claiming it was just a code name all along. Litigation, though, may be the real reason as it seems the word may be owned by a European company or individual that objected to its use. The change comes late in the …


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  1. Ged T

    In response to...

    "...Microsoft executives are racking their brains for a new word to sum up the controversial user interface..." I'd like to suggest

    PAIN 4 Windows 8

    Mine's the one with the broken glass in teh pocket...

    1. Bob Vistakin

      Re: In response to...

      I'd go for "Stillborn".

      However, I thought Gartner got it right last week with "bad" - or have wacko's lawyers been sniffing around too?

      1. Reading Your E-mail

        Re: In response to...

        WIndows 8 Morgue

        Windows 8 Swansong

        Windows 8 Whoopsy

        Windows 8 Nosedive

        Windows 8 Cratered

        you get the gist...

        1. wowfood

          Re: In response to...

          Windows 8 Cancer

          I mean it's spreading unstopably to all windows platforms, the name makes sense. About the only thing that would stop it now is by eradiating all the people who support it in microsoft and then injecting them with poison.

    2. x4zYYvb3

      Re: In response to...

      Windows Frames...?

    3. henrydddd

      Re: In response to...

      How about calling it Windows real good

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: In response to...

        "How about calling it Windows real good"

        I suppose they're going to tell us that the "RT" in "Windows RT" stands for Really Terriffic.

        I just think it's really terrible!

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: In response to...

          IMHO, they should consider co-branding it with Fisher Price.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: In response to...

      Windows F-Ewe seems apt.

    5. Eeep !

      Re: In response to...

      Their use of blocks of solid colour suggests:

      Concrete Windows

    6. kb

      Re: In response to...

      How about "Oh Hai" as in "Oh Hai! I iz a cellphone now LOL!" which is pretty much win 8 in a nutshell. I swear if i didn't know better i'd think the whole thing was an Onion style parody, but sadly others like Canonical have adopted the "Oh Hai" interface as well. It seems like Jobs last laugh is gonna be making every UI designer lose their minds and try to make everything into a damned cell phone like some cargo cult praying for the ghost of Jobs to bring them some iMoney.

      Of course they could always go with metrosexual, its about as tasteless as metrosexual fashion and the guys up in Redmond wouldn't know what it meant anyway, they'd just be happy they could keep the original work by tacking sexual onto the end. Besides who don't like sex?

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Now to reveal it's real name

    Windows Wank

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      New name

      Microsoft Window

      job done. Time for a pint

      1. amanfromarse

        Re: New name

        Ha ha. Brilliant.

        That's the winner.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: New name, Barry?

        Are you related to Barry Shitpeas? Seems like it runs in the family and is a more common ailment than I first thought.

        Also, are they going to sue David Beckham for dressing up in skirts as a metro-sexual with a man-bag?

        Doesn't seem like justice to me.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: New name, Barry?

          Are you related to Barry Shitpeas? Seems like it runs in the family and is a more common ailment than I first thought.

          Erm no

  3. Pahhh

    They should do it the Apple way...

    They should do it the Apple way whereby you keep using the term even though you dont own but also actively suing anyone else that might be using the term, like the French undergound. ...

    1. jonathanb Silver badge

      Re: They should do it the Apple way...

      From reports elsewhere, it appears it is a German cash & carry outfit that are complaining about it.

      The French borrowed the name for their underground railway from the District and Metropolitan Railway in London, which was often shortened to the Met or Metro. It became more frequently known as "The Tube" some time after they added actual tube tunnels to the network. The Geordies call their underground network "The Tyne and Wear Metro"

      As pointed out elsewhere there is also a 1980s car made by the British Leyland Group with that name.

      1. h4rm0ny

        Re: They should do it the Apple way...

        "From reports elsewhere, it appears it is a German cash & carry outfit that are complaining about it."

        But surely trademarks have to be in the same area? I.e. you can have Apple the music label and Apple the computer maker, because they're not (at the time, anyway) overlapping. How can a "cash & carry" (that means a shop, btw?) be overlapping with a O/S GUI?

        1. Al Jones

          How can a "cash & carry" (that means a shop, btw?) be overlapping with a O/S GUI?

          Maybe they're concerned about confusion over the "Metro Market" for apps?

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: How can a "cash & carry" (that means a shop, btw?) be overlapping with a O/S GUI?

            I'm sure that's it. If it is Metro AG, Microsoft could be in trouble if they wanted to have a "Metro market", and also if Metro AG decided to OEM phones with their own UI add-ons, for instance.

        2. jonathanb Silver badge

          Re: They should do it the Apple way...

          Sorry, for the benefit of those outside the UK/Ireland, a cash and carry is a type of shop that sells things in bulk, primarily to shopkeepers.

        3. Naughtyhorse

          Re: They should do it the Apple way...

          Apple the music label and Apple the computer maker

          wasn't there a protracted legal case on this, and the dark side won as i recall, even though apple corps predates the cupertino foxconn re-brander by several decades

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: They should do it the Apple way...

            No. Much as I dislike Apple, it wasn't unreasonable. At the time of the agreement, the "Music business" consisted solely of selling overpriced vinyl and tat in order to keep Colombians in business. By the time Apple added the "sosume" sound to the Mac, computers were handling music and it would have crippled them not to be able to enter that business. Computerised music was not the music business in force at the time of the agreement.

            I would agree that American conservatives believe that the Constitution written by a group of pre-industrial white slave-owning oligarchs is valid word for word for all time, but I submit that Conservatives in the US are so stupid that that in itself is an argument against rigid interpretation of old documents. (The other one is American religious conservatives who, if possible, are even more stupid...but I digress).

        4. fschenk

          Re: They should do it the Apple way... Perhaps not

          Metro is a worldwide wholesale & retail company with a turnover of about 60 Billion € (2011), and the largest reseller of Microsoft software in Europe (Media Market, Saturn). With about 250.000 employees a little bit larger than Microsoft, and certainly with some good lawyers.

      2. sleepy

        So: Windows Marina then.

        Or Windows Leyland

        1. Big-nosed Pengie
          Thumb Up

          So: Windows Marina then.

          "Or Windows Leyland"

          Entirely appropriate! Cars whose appalling build quality single-handedly destroyed the British car industry.

          In Australia, Leyland produced a catastrophe called the P76 - so incredibly ugly and so atrociously built - even by Leyland standards - that it became Australia's answer to the Ford Edsel.

          So I suggest Windows P76.

          1. mrfill

            Re: So: Windows Marina then.

            I guess Australia never got the Allegro, the first car to have a square (well 'quartic') steering wheel.

            Clearly the Allegro design team have been working hard since then and the Win8 UI is their latest masterpiece so - WIndows Allegro

            I'll bloody sue if they do.....

          2. Allan George Dyer

            Re: So: Windows Marina then.

            But Leyland's buses were (are, they are some still refusing to die) quite good, so how about:

            Windows Routemaster

            (and wasn't the P76 a WWII fighter plane?)

            The one with the return ticket. ding ding!

            1. Robert E A Harvey

              @Allan George Dyer

              Windows Allegro sounds about right. It had a square steering wheel, everyone talked about it, and no-one willingly bought one.

          3. jonathanb Silver badge

            Re: So: Windows Marina then.

            I think Windows P45 would be better. For people in the US who don't get the reference, it could be renamed to Windows Pink Slip.

          4. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: So: Windows Marina then.

            Excuse me! It wasn't only the appalling build quality; it was also the crappy design, both mechanical and aesthetic. The engine and transmission of the Marina were so over-complicated that maintenance on a small, cheap car cost more than it did on a 3.5 litre Rover.

            I guess it might be libellous to mistakenly posit any resemblance whatsoever to Microsoft products. Though I do like Azure.

            1. MJI Silver badge

              Re: So: Windows Marina then.


              Scarily bad compared to the opposition.

              Poor front suspension, cart spring rear suspension


              Bigger engines are BLs duff designs.

              I much prefered the Avenger in that market place, good suspension, great seats, tough well designed 1600 pushrod lump with 8 port head and well oversquare.

          5. Robert Ramsay

            Re: So: Windows Marina then.

            What about the Windows P45 :D

        2. This post has been deleted by its author

        3. MJI Silver badge

          Think bad

          Windows Allegro

        4. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: So: Windows Marina then.

          No, but I'll bet there wouldn't be any trademark disputes if the called it Windows Malaria instead.

      3. Robert E A Harvey

        British Leyland Group

        but no-one is going to sue over the Mini Metro, because it would mean popping yer head out of the trenches and admitting you had some connection with the wretched misbegotten rustbucket.

        Mine's the one with old car keys lost in the lining.

      4. Tom 35

        Re: They should do it the Apple way...

        Metro is also a supermarket in Canada

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: They should do it the Apple way...

      It's not about who owns the naming rights to what.

      Having your business' name linked to Microsoft is a bad idea.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Why not an OBVIOUS infringement... :P


    Back to where RIM was with the BBx(*) trademark...

    For Win8 -- Should have been code-named "Squarepants", and released as "Spongebob" for all I know.

    (*) A trademark owned by Basis International.

    "Spongebob Squarepants" is a tradmark of Viacom via Nickleodeon brand also owned by Viacom. Trademarke referred to and Used under Fair Use provisions for this comment.

    1. nematoad Silver badge

      Re: Why not an OBVIOUS infringement... :P

      "Should have been code-named "Squarepants"

      No, just shorten it to "Pants", says it all, really.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Why not an OBVIOUS infringement... :P

        Mmmm.... I like Windows PANTS.

        Windows Post-Aero NT Server

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Why not an OBVIOUS infringement... :P

      They already tied Microsoft Bob. So how about sticking to Sponge?

      1. Someone Else Silver badge

        @TechnicalBen Re: Why not an OBVIOUS infringement... :P

        Works for me...everyone knows that sponges suck....

  5. squilookle

    I can help them rename this. They want something that summarizes the Design Language Formerly Known as Metro.... The BBC article on this says the previous name was picked because it is "modern and clean"... We can work with that.

    It's also tied to their operating systems, we want people to know that.

    So, I say the new name should be....

    MAC OS.


    1. Bush_rat

      And they should go all in....

      And only release it to boot campers!

  6. Smileeee

    You got me

    I was getting ready to spend £40 on the upgrade

    1. Ian Yates

      Re: You got me

      Ditto. I was actually thinking "at last, they understand!"... shame

      The "Classic" Win8 desktop seems quite reasonable, but I just found the Metro (or whatever) stuff a huge waste of my time...

  7. Ad Fundum

    I maintain that if they're looking for a name that is:

    - in keeping with their corporate branding and colours

    - reflects the structured, grid-like appearance

    - also reflects the way that the public feel about their products

    then surely the only possible names they can consider is "Blue Waffle"?

    1. Richard Wharram
      Thumb Up


      Grid Oriented Application Tablet Second Edition

      1. TeeCee Gold badge

        Nah. It has to be "Hangover".

        The inevitable result of a night on the tiles.......

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          or "gravypants"

  8. Richard Wharram

    I suggest

    Given it's signature is a lack of 3D skuemorphistic elements it appears essentially flat. So...

    Flat OS

    or Flatus.

    (flame is a lit flatus)

    1. Lord Voldemortgage


  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I so nearly jumped with joy.

    Alas, the headline was deliberately there to sink my Friday afternoon.

    "Microsoft 'The awful piece of karp known as Metro (tm pending Apple approval)'" will still be there, they're just calling it something else.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    An advertising agency has got the contract.

    Because of the hands on mechanism of the tablet, they're calling it Clap UI.

    (I got this straight from my friend Hua Chen Ya at the Yokamushi design agency.)

  11. AndrueC Silver badge

    How about "Windows None" :)

  12. Paul Shirley

    how long has WinPhone been shipping with Metro?

    ...but haven't they had a Metro product out for a year or so? Or did I just imagine frequent use of Metro when discussing WP7 (possible since the actual phones seem pretty imaginary in real life ;)

    1. h4rm0ny

      Re: how long has WinPhone been shipping with Metro?

      WP7 interface was never called Metro officially - that's always been the GUI for WIn8. It's just that many kept calling it 'Metro' because of the tiles. Incorrectly really as FKAM is also the APIs and other features that weren't in WP7.

      1. Brian

        Re: how long has WinPhone been shipping with Metro?

        MS has been calling the UI Design 'Metro' since Zune, XBox, and even Media Center.. it certainly isn't a new name just for Windows 8.

      2. Ian Johnston Silver badge
        Thumb Up

        Re: how long has WinPhone been shipping with Metro?

        FKAM - pronounced "fuck 'em" - seems like the perfect solution.

    2. Anonymous Coward


      The official name for the start screen has always been "Live Tiles" or 'tiles'. So no problems there.

  13. David Austin

    So metro is no longer Metro, and Aero is no longer Aero. Nice one, Microsoft.

    1. Elmer Phud

      No problems for the early release people - W8SP1 will be in its way soon.

    2. Spiracle

      So the phone version is no longer the Mini Metro interface. Disappointing.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      ...and soon...

      Microsoft could be no longer, too...

  14. uhuznaa

    Epic fail

    Metro was a nice, catchy name. Not checking for trademarks and coming to some agreement with others holding that trademark before naming the fscking software is just... unprofessional.

    I'm really curios if MS has been more careful with checking for other trademarks and patents in Windows 8 or if the thing will be shot down within a week.

    1. Captain Underpants

      Re: Epic fail

      I will break my hole laughing if someone else has managed to trademark "Windows 8" in relation to computing :D

    2. Anonymous Coward

      Re: Epic fail

      "Metro" IS not a nice catchy name....

      It fucking sucks... like a battery converted shopping trolly becomes a green electric eco friendly car kind of sucks.

      It's like being 14 and finding someone has put a hand full of sand in your jar of Vaseline....

      It's just fucking TRAGIC - that's that the name "Metro" is...

      Copyrighting that name? Metro has always been used as an abreviation of Metropolis.... and spewed forth as a trendy conjunctive like Metrosexual or something...

      Or as descripitive terms for "city" type transport..... "The Met"

      Quick a new name and an catchy abbreviation for it.... I know - "People Over Xs" or POX for short.

      Hmm back to the sandy Vaseline....

      1. AndrueC Silver badge

        Re: Epic fail

        >"Metro" IS not a nice catchy name....

        It made me think of metrosexual for some reason :)

      2. Rodrigo Rollan

        Re: Epic fail

        I just read your post with Fat Bastard's voice in my head (fat Scottish stereotype, Austin Powers Character).....Brilliant

    3. Anonymous Coward

      Re: Epic fail

      "Not checking for trademarks and coming to some agreement with others holding that trademark before naming the fscking software is just... unprofessional."

      Now don't be mean here. MS had promised this company a /free/ copy of WIn8, its not their fault that this company doesn't want anything to do with it.

  15. c2423

    How about "Windows: Last Edition"?

    1. LinkOfHyrule

      I've got it...

      Windows 8 | Judgement Day

  16. TheOtherHobbes

    Windows: Cult of the Dead Horse

    So no one in Legal checked?

    Could happen to anyone, I guess.

  17. Gottapulse

    How about Simple Simon after the "toy" of a couple of decades ago?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward


      It was called Simon, simple Simon was a nursery rhyme.

  18. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

    The obvious

    Windows 'Flatline' Edition. That's what most people here think that it is going to do in sales.

    Time for a beer and to watch some Olympics methinks.

  19. Uncle Slacky Silver badge

    "Polished Turd"

    As title...

    1. Tank boy

      Re: "Polished Turd"

      Brilliant! I was thinking of something more wordy.

      Windows 8: Sucks less than Vista!


      Windows 8: We'll get it right by service Pack 3 (maybe 4)


      Windows 8: Aw fuck it, you're going to have to buy this crap anyway.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Could the late Ian Dury have the answer?

      "Hello Mrs Wood, this GUI looks familiar, they used to call it Windows 8 Metro.

      Now it's Windows Fucking Shit Cunt"

  20. Knochen Brittle

    all the below are free

    iRape, iRate, iNchoate, FacePunch, DeskDeth, DoomSkeem, NutCramp, HeadLock, HelpCry, Ballmer'sRevenge, AversionTherapy and WTF?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: all the below are free

      Windows Tablet Format?

      1. Albert Hall

        Win WTF...

        Yes, it fits!

        Alternately, how 'bout Win L7... square enough?

        1. Havin_it

          Re: Win WTF...

          I'll have that. Puts me in mind of "Pretend We're Dead"*, which is never a bad thing. Can the tagline be "Here's a used tampon, motherf*ckers"? Seems to fit.

          *...and you'll be able to accurately guess how many licences we're gonna buy, Mr Ballmer..

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Windows For Kids 3.11

    How about that, as clearly Metro is so dumbed down, the applets it runs are no use for anything other than a simple childrens game.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    In my opinion

    They should call it Windows Elbee.... in LB (lead balloon).

    P.S. Thanks for getting my hopes up with the headline guys. Bastards.

    1. Allan George Dyer

      Re: In my opinion

      I initially read Elbee as Ebola.

      Hey, that's got a nice ring to it:

      Windows Ebola - Giving Killer App a New Meaning!

      (Hmph, no biohaz icon)

  23. Peter 39


    Just call it "Square".

  24. hplasm



  25. Tom 38

    Windows Vista 2.0

    1. Kyoraki

      Surely you mean Windows ME version 3?

      1. Captain DaFt

        Might as well go for the whole hog then... Bob 4.0

  26. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    How about Windows "Maestro"

    Or, as per the original naming ethos, there's always "Montego", "Maxi" or if we want to go a little earlier in the alphabet, "Allegro"...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: How about Windows "Maestro"

      "Allegro" wins the day. Whatever could go wrong if we make everything square?...

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: How about Windows "Maestro"


        I'd forgotten about that classic bit of steering wheel design...

      2. Anomalous Cowturd

        Re: "Allegro" wins the day."

        Don't laugh, but I had an "All-aggro" way back in the 80s, and it was a very comfortable, (hydrogas suspension) nippy, (I had the 1.6) car. The slightly squared off, or was that rounded square? steering wheel was actually fine to use. (Mine was leather too.)

        It did use about half a gallon of oil every week, and obviously smoked like a trooper, but good while it lasted... :o)

        Agreed about Leyland cars generally though. They really were shit.

        AC, for obvious reasons!

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Windows Appledroid anyone?

  28. This post has been deleted by its author

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "Windows 8 style UI"

    I think could have dropped the style. Since Ex-Metro doesn't have any of it.

  30. digismith
    Thumb Down

    Call it what ever you want

    You can call it Gap Arsed Turnip Twaddler. Its still crap.

  31. Archivist


    For those who remember the SQUARE window.

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Windows Titanic

    Windows Edsel

    Windows Pinto

    Windows Beiber

    Windows GaGa

    Windows Gigli

    Windows Chlamydia

    Windows Virginity

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Alternatives

      Windows Limited?

  33. JimmyPage Silver badge

    I would have thought the solution was obvious

    throw open a competition to crowdsource a name via the new userbase.

    Both of them.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I would have thought the solution was obvious

      Just call it Outlook?

      They've already got that name and

  34. Richard Wharram

    Another go.

    Anything with a Windows 8 style can be described as:


    e.g. this UI is utterly 8ful in every way.

  35. This post has been deleted by its author

  36. Rob Carriere

    Microsoft Shutters?

    1. PaulW

      Oooh got it...

      Windows Curtains!

      (Yay first day of 10 days vacation - brain is working again!)

  37. This post has been deleted by its author

  38. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


  39. Cameron Colley

    How about using some letters from Metro?

    The could skip some letters and call it Windows ME. It's not like that's been used to brand anything of significance before and a nice touch is it's also the name of a debilitating illness.

  40. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Windows MetroExual

    Windows WeHateYou

  41. captain veg Silver badge

    Code name

    Older reader might remember that Microsoft's first foray into desktop databases was codenamed Cirrus. They have to drop that, because it was the name of an American credit card.

    So they called it Access instead.

    I suppose "Barclaycard" was a bit too long.


  42. John70

    What's in a name?

    How about shorten Metro to Me and call it Windows Me.

    Since it's spelt Me and not ME, it won't be confused with Windows ME.

    1. John70

      Re: What's in a name?

      Damn... Cameron Colley beat me to it...

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    How about....

    ......Window Pains?

  44. kissingthecarpet
    Thumb Up


    Not one fanboi amongst them - all Reg commenters hate W8. Are MS the new Novell?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Wow

      Or have the MS stories on the Reg's forums become a self selecting group of MS haters, who round on and shout down anyone who says anything perceived as pro MS? Thus the people who actually like anything MS, increasingly don't bother commenting.

      (Oh yeah, and any comment calling this behavior out is usually followed by a rather weak "I'd like them if they just did X or Y", which usually comes from someone with a history of ill informed shouting down.)

      1. jnemesh

        Re: Wow

        No, it's just that it's early still in Redmond. It's about 8:44, so expect a lot of positive posts about how great Windows 8 is in about 15 minutes, once the MS employees clock in....

      2. LinkOfHyrule

        Re: Wow

        I actually need to post nasty comments about MS for "technical legal reasons" - it's part of my remit to be seen as a beacon of impartiality. I've slagged Apple so much for their rounded rectangles that its only proper I slag MS for their very much non rounded rectangles too!

      3. jim 45

        Re: Wow

        It's not just the forums, it's the Reg itself. Anything MS does or says - cook up some astoundingly negative, over-the-top spin - and immediately tell the world how it's totally ignorant and evil. If that sounds familiar, think "Fox News".

        As someone who spent decades as a Windows developer, I have no love for Microsoft as a company, but this blindlngly one-sided, totally predictable coverage simply loses my interest. Couldn't we hear some other voices?

    2. Captain DaFt

      Re: Wow

      Dude, even the fanbois hate "Windows 8 UI"!

    3. jnemesh

      Re: Wow

      No, I think they are the new IBM. Remember OS/2 and the PS/2 platform? Windows 8 REEKS of the same arrogance IBM had when they introduced those.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Remember OS/2 [was Re: Wow]

        Having used OS/2 Warp 3 and 4, I think I'd prefer those to the modern versions of Windows, and especially to what I've seen of Windows 8.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Wow

      Nope, more like the new SCO.

      From all the rumours floating about perhaps they were really the puppet masters of the old SCO as well

  45. Anonymous Custard Silver badge

    How about...


    Cos it covers up any usefulness of Windows, and it will be for Microsoft?

  46. TeeCee Gold badge

    Crystal ball.

    2012: Blah, blah, blah, "...(NGSB). That technology hasn’t been heard of much since."

    2014: Blah, blah, blah, "...(NGSB). That technology also hasn’t been heard of much since."

  47. Some Call Me Tim

    The Simple Answer

    The simple answer is if they can't use the "Metro"name any is to simply remove the "Metro" interface from Windows 8 completely.

    That would make Everybody happy :-)

    Especially MS shareholders, OEMs, Resellers, Developers, Valve, Enterprises, and of course the poor forgotten end users ;-)

  48. toadwarrior

    If they rename it pussy fart, I'll buy two copies.

    1. hplasm

      Metro, by any other name

      Will smell and sound the same...

    2. Anomalous Cowturd

      @ Toadwarrior Re: If they rename it pussy fart, I'll buy two copies.

      I won't buy (or pirate) any copies, no matter what they call it, but that made me LOL.


    3. MJI Silver badge

      Cat farts stink

      I used to have one - died at 18

  49. Dana W


    The name now being synonymous with "failed OS" might have something to do with it?

  50. Big_Ted


    Windows vTech

    Window Blind

    Windows Boxy Version

    Windows H8er

  51. Big_Ted
    Paris Hilton


    Windows Paris

    Because its a dumb blond of an OS

  52. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What's in a name?

    That which we call a turd. By any other name would still smell as rancid.

  53. Eddy Ito

    Let's see...

    Tile Style, hell no. Dashboard, not without a lawsuit. Bricks, too BSoD. Merde, hmm international, descriptive, perfect!

  54. georgeclooneylookalike

    "It's not a Metro Lyn, it's a Rover 100!"

    Ah-ha! Didn't BL have a car in the 80's called Metro?

    1. LinkOfHyrule

      Re: "It's not a Metro Lyn, it's a Rover 100!"

      You've actually inadvertently made a really important point - Windows 8 is actually so bad, Allan Partridge will now start using a Mac! And he's the sort of dude who'd have thought Windows ME was the best OS ever...

  55. Anonymous Coward

    Why don't they just

    Why don't they just abbreviate it again?

    Windows 8 ME.

  56. Anonymous Coward

    Metro is a bad name?

    Took them til now?

    Every time someone mentioned Metro I had visions of a hearing aid beige rusting MiniMetro.

    Almost as bad as the germanic overlords of Mini, when searching for a name for the large Mini they almost went for Maxi, until someone from the UK pointed out it's previous incarnation....

    My suggestion for a new name - Program Manager. But then that's maybe giving it glory it doesn't deserve.

    How about a name giving an "everyman" feeling to the UI? Informal yet familiar. How about "BOB"?

    1. MJI Silver badge

      Re: Metro is a bad name?

      Bob the Builder

      He uses bricks!

      <Cue Neil Morrisy singing the theme song>

  57. Tom 35

    Windows Phone 7?

    So it is still a Beta/Alpha release?

    Code name? Nice try.

  58. lambda_beta

    I've got it!!

    How about something like "Microsoft Bob"

    codename "Utopia"

    1. Bob Vistakin

      Re: I've got it!!

      Right on bro.

  59. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    matching the ease of use

    Windows Painted Shut

  60. ElNumbre
    Thumb Up

    Windows Bricks

    Call it Windows(tm) Bricks.

    "Navigate through Windows using Bricks"

    "A brick has caused Windows to break"

    "Windows Mobile 8 is bricked".

    And they have a ready made catch phrase/marketing opportunity thanks to Father Ted's Father Jack "I love my brick"

    1. Boris the Cockroach Silver badge

      Re: Windows Bricks

      You owe me a keyboard

  61. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    name recycling

    One person's loss is another's gain...

    How about calling it 'Allen'?

    (Keep up)

  62. h4rm0ny


    They should call it "ExMetro". Short, still to the point and everyone knows what it refers to. Shows an ability to show good humour too.

    MS - you totally have my permission to use this. Call it "ExMetro". It's what lots of people will call it anyway.

    1. hplasm

      Re: ExMetro

      Sooner or later =ExCrete

      Followed up by ExCrement =SP1.

      You know it would happen...

  63. Charlie van Becelaere

    Just call it


    That's so hip and all that even the cool kids will want a copy.

  64. The Brave Sir Robin

    Windows Tablets First

    or Windows WTF for short.

  65. DrXym

    My name


  66. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Win H8

    The sad thing about these comments, reflecting almost unanimous dislike of the Metro UI is that Redmond just don't care. Just as with the infamous ribbon, Redmond knows best and the only choice we get is the one (Redmond) size fits all.

    And as for User configurability that's all gone too, because Redmond knows better than users what they want.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Win H8

      If you want an OS that you can configure to work the way *you* want, install Linux. Otherwise stop whinging and take what Redmond gives you. Microsoft doesn't care what you think, and it's not as if there aren't better alternatives out there...

  67. Zombie Womble

    They should take inspiration from Apple and call it the pOS.

    1. Albert Hall


      If they were to be inspired by Apple (could that really happen?) shirley they'd call it Win X OS. You know, kinda like "Office Open" doc format.

  68. jim 45

    it's irrelevant

    So what was the "standard" Windows UI called? Nothing. It had no name. Or maybe, according to a lot of posters here, we should call it "XP" and demand that it remain unchanged until the end of time.

    Whatever name is formally assigned to the Windows 8 UI, I already like, and am already using it, and all the verbal venom still being directed at it is just a lot of incomprehensible noise to me. Really, it you can't grasp it in minutes of experimentation, consider going into another line of work.

    1. Cameron Colley

      Re: it's irrelevant

      I "grasped it" fine - it's just shit. It's an absolutely pointless and pathetic thing to put on a desktop PC.

      As a simple example of its pathetic nature they've taken off the start menu button to replace it with a blank space. So they've saved zero space and now you have piss around hovering over the corner (very annoying in VMs and RDP) instead for _no reason_. Similar goes for the stupid fills-the-screen start menu -- you gain absolutely nothing at the expense of covering your entire desktop when you want to look for an application.

      There are absolutely no gains in usability on the desktop and there is no need for metro to be on the desktop apart from MS's mistaken belief that doing so will help sell their tablets.

      1. jim 45

        Re: it's irrelevant

        Yes, the Start button is gone. And with it, Western civilization, which has lost the ability to adapt to change .

        But did you happen to notice the live tiles?

        1. Tom 35

          Re: it's irrelevant

          "But did you happen to notice the live tiles?"

          Active Desktop 2.0?

          The things they just told everyone to turn off in Win7?

          Just as useless on a win8 desktop.

        2. hazydave

          Re: it's irrelevant

          The live tiles are in the completely wrong place. If I need active information updates, I want these in my workspace, where I might actually see the information of interest. Not mixed in with hundreds of other icons in my program launcher. Window 7 gadgets, Android widgets pretty much do this correctly, desktop or mobile. Room for improvement in either , perhaps. But Microsoft's approach completely fails for any but very casual users with just a few apps on a tablet or phone.

    2. hplasm

      Re: it's irrelevant

      Windows Saddo.

  69. Havin_it


    And I already bought :(

  70. b166er

    By the amount of whining on here, I reckon the average age of a Register reader is, well, old.

    You're the same bunch that said the Olympics would be crap too, aren't you.

    This really isn't a troll BTW, I'm serious.

    Lighten up you luddites, this rag used to have a sense of humour, now it's almost an endless snoozefest of cliched and predictable criticisms mixed with low-brow flamebaiting, neither of which constitutes anything close to humour.

    1. jim 45

      I think I'm starting to understand the vitriolic hatred of Windows 8 on display here.

      The sad fact is that most of the truly creative people - who like things that are new and different, and are appreciative of visual design - long ago went to Apple and aren't coming back. Today's Windows user base contains a whole lot of cranky IT people to whom any significant change in the OS just means more work and more problems - to them, there's no upside. These are the guys who are going ballistic because the Start button has changed.

      I think it's unfortunate that this narrow point of view - which to me is just one big buzz kill - seems to have become the de facto position of the Register itself. But, in the end, the Reg's constituency is IT, not people from other walks of life.

      The challenge to MS is to win back the creative people. The GUI formerly known as Metro is a good start.

      1. hazydave

        New != Better

        I don't believe the rejection of the Windows 8 UI, particularly on the desktop, has anything to do with users having no interest in an improved UI. But rather, the failure of the Windows 8 UI, period. It's just bad. It trades tiny motor for large motor activity on the desktop. It eliminates program heirarchies, making it all flat. It removes Windowed applications, at least in the new interface. It takes away very efficient modes of working, and replaces them with clumsiness. Change does not always mean positive evolution.

        Contrast this with Apple's changes. They are taking ideas from the iOS environment into MacOS, but actually innovating. They're add multi touch in ways useful to users with mice or touch pad interfaces, they don't imagine a desktop PC with 2-3 screens as being controlled in the same way as a 10" tablet or 4" phone as positive change.

        No one else dies, either.

    2. Bob Vistakin

      Yes everyone - pay up your $5 Android extortion tax and laugh whilst you're doing it, else you're just a bunch of moaning minnies.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Not quite

      I think we are the same bunch that said that the commercialisation of the Olympics would be crap and that it would lose money. Both those objections seem to be borne out.

      What I like about the Olympics is that the British winners are mostly in minority sports and don't make significant money out of it. Every time a pair of women PhD students gets a gold medal for rowing I feel warm and happy inside because it's so quintessentially English.

      Whereas everything that American megacorps touch, whether it is Apple, Microsoft, Macdonalds or General Motors, seems to turn into mud that doesn't justify the enormous sums spent.

  71. Get the puck outa here



    None of those really work.

    Metro is a supermarket chain in Canada. I doubt they sued, though.

    I was so looking forward to being labelled a Metrosexual when I fell in love with Win8's 4-bit colour squares and touch screen interface on my 27" monitor. But then my arms got tired. Damn you Saint Jobs, you were right again!

  72. David Paul Morgan

    why not...

    ... Windows Live Tile?


    Windows LT

    Better than 'surface'.

    they already use Windows Live and Tile does describe their widgets equivalent.

  73. Eduard Coli

    How about this

    They could call it ME2

  74. Grendel
    Paris Hilton

    Lets call it STI

    Lets call it Square Touch Interface (STI) ... after all from the sound of it, its about as welcome as a dose of clap!


    Why Paris? Because she probably knows what STI means :-)

  75. Lghost


    that is all

  76. CmdrX3

    I used to own a metro.

    Right up until the day the bonnet latch broke while I was driving at 60 up a country road. Luckily it was a straight bit of road and I managed to drive in a straight line as I braked, I looked out the window seeing nothing but the entire bonnet propped against the front window and rattling in the wind, I thought to myself, I've got to get myself a new fucking car. I get the feeling that if I buy Windows 8 I will just need to change the word car for OS.

    As for a new name for Metro, that's easy. you just need to take inspiration from the car...... Shite.

  77. skuzzzy

    Colourful - check. Square corners - check. Suitable for use by children - check.


    Windows Lego Edition

    added bonus; all the earlier 'Bricked' comments are still applicable

  78. CyberCipher

    Metro is so Retro, so they should call it

    the Windows H8 Retro Interface -- because it looks like Windows 1.0 (circa 1985).

    And besides, that's what my dog has been calling it for the last 10 months or so.

    1. cordwainer 1

      Re: Metro is so Retro, so they should call it

      The biggest problem is making the damned thing mandatory. Sure, some people will love it; some commenters are already defending it. There's no reason they shouldn't like it....except when they go on to claim the naysayers must stupid if they can't figure it out.

      Nope. We're not stupid. We simply don't WANT to use it. We see no real benefit in it, aesthetically or as part of a tool intended to get things done.

      Nor do we want to support the fast or slow retraining of end users and waste millions of work hours for no good reason. And let's not even go into the incompatibility with existing software and hardware that has become the norm with every new Windows version, costing the end user more wasted time and money.

      How hard would it be for Microsoft to offer a "The-Interface-Formerly-Known-As-Metro" option for those who love it, and leave the same old consistent, everyone knows it already, Start Menu/Toolbar/Desktop for everyone else? Particularly corporations?

      Who are, by the way, in huge numbers still using Windows XP. (Haven't any of you checked in with, oh, maybe a large U.S. health service or hospital lately? They can't afford patients dying because of a tiny incompatibility with Vista discovered a bit too late...say, while the doctor is performing surgery).

      I'm not a Microsoft hater....but I am fed up with them spending more and more time trying to "compete" in areas where they are playing catch up, instead of seriously digging in and giving us the kind of OS they used to be capable of.

      Sorry, MS, my customers are in droves sticking with XP, the ones who got new computers with Vista or Windows 7 in the majority don't like it in comparison (some loathe it). The ones who never used Windows before, not so much of a problem, because they mostly only use it for web browsing, word processing, etc., online email, and they assume the little quirks they encounter are normal.

      But older users, especially the businesses I support? Most of them are asking WHY they need to upgrade when all it means is frustration and expense? I'm trying to get them to give 7 a chance-how sad that is.

      The home users go on about how they particularly hate Mail, not being able to set up separate users like they did in Outlook Express, and major gripes about windows constantly Snapping to full screen (until I show them how to turn that off - not real easy for your average user to find, you know? And why the hell would you make that the default anyway?)

      Maybe you scoff at those as small things, but MS, you aren't getting the point: Those small bits of frustration add up after a while - a ribbon here, an over-simplified search interface there, another change in terminology - is it Shut Down? Turn Off? Are they the same? What happened to My Documents?

      Every minute of productive time a user loses, while they wrestle, however briefly, with something different that didn't need to be changed - that seems to have been changed solely for the sake of change, or "hipness", or a marketing team's suggestion, or to be more like a competitor (why?) - builds up.

      Lose enough minutes, and you've lost an hour. Lose an hour of time you intended to spend on a task, because the tool you use to accomplish it was redesigned and no longer comfortable or familiar...well, an hour is a lot of time to lose if you're on a deadline, or have promised to be at your daughter's baseball game.

      It doesn't take much before another Windows user snaps....and asks me about getting a Mac. Or about, "that Linux thing".

      Congratulations, Redmond. Your own OS is becoming the best free advertising there is for other platforms. Daddy Bill must be so proud.

  79. Old Handle
    Black Helicopters

    Diabolical plan?

    I wonder if they thought be "unnaming" the worst aspect of Windows 8 they would make it harder to criticize. If you say "Metro is a poor UI for desktops" people know exactly what you mean. If you say "The Windows 8 style UI is not good for a desktop", it just sounds like "I don't like Windows 8".

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Diabolical plan?

      Looks like we will be forced to stick with the tried and tested 'Windows is shit.'

  80. cordwainer 1

    My apologies for the off-topic rant, on topic...

    Please note the acronym for The Interface Formerly Known As Metro, read backward, is MAKFIT, so I vote for calling it the MAK interface.

    Second choice would be dogs, of course, in keeping with other OS's animal motifs. Perhaps:

    Microsoft Poodle - The First Non-Shedding Windows. No More OS Allergies!

  81. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'm shocked that Microsoft isn't fighting for the use of the "Metro" trademark

    This whole debacle with Microsoft dropping the name "Metro" for their "Live Tile"-based user-interfaces at this extremely late stage in the game is absolutely bizarre. As another poster here already mentioned, the "Metro" name for Microsoft's tile-based UI is anything but new. The Microsoft "Metro" name has been around for six years now, and was used in conjunction with the user-interfaces for Zune and Windows Media Center long before it was ever used to describe the user-interfaces for Windows Phone 7, XBOX 360, and Windows 8. That sets quite a precedent for Microsoft using the "Metro" name to uniquely identify a product in commerce, so you would think that it would give them a very strong case to claim that the Metro trademark when used to describe a software product was theirs.

    To explain to the best of my understanding (as I am not a lawyer), in the U.S. at least, for a company to be able to keep a trademark they need to essentially do three things:

    1. Use the mark to uniquely identify a product or the source of a product in commerce (this is where a trademark registration can come in handy, as it provides a solid verifiable record of a mark's use in commerce).

    2. Make sure that a mark is not likely to cause confusion with another mark that is in use.

    3. Actively use and protect the mark.

    The German retail company Metro AG has threatened legal action against Microsoft probably under the grounds of point #2 above-- that Microsoft using the "Metro" name would cause confusion, brand name weakening, or other such damage to Metro AG's trademark. I find this argument to be very odd on two grounds: First of all, Microsoft and Metro AG are in different industries. I don't think very many people out there are going to confuse Microsoft's Windows Phone/ Windows 8 user-interface with products from a German retail company. "Metro" has already been used as a mark to identify lots of companies and products previously, such as vehicles built by General Motors, Austin, and General Harvester, an airplane built by Fairchild, several different store chains in several countries, and various newspapers, magazines, and television networks around the world. Up until this point all of those trademarks were considered non-confusing and distinct to one another, and they all more-or-less happily co-existed. With that in mind, I could potentially see Metro AG going after another retail store such as the Metro supermarket chain in Greece because both Metro AG's "Metro Cash and Carry" stores and the Metro supermarket chain both operate within the country of Greece, but Metro AG being confused with the Windows 8 "Metro" user-interface? That is really a stretch.

    Secondly (under U.S. Trademark law at least), a company has to actively protect its trademarks to be able to keep them. That means that if another company starts selling a competing product with a confusingly similar mark you need to threaten or sue that competitor into stopping as soon as you can. If you don't and you allow the competitor's product to get established in the market under that confusingly similar mark, you will lose your ability to protect your mark against that competitor's mark. In other words, if you snooze you lose. I would argue that Microsoft would also have a case here, since they have been using the Metro mark to identify their tile-based UI since at least 2006. If Metro AG had a problem with Microsoft using the name, they should have threatened Microsoft with legal action about it four or five years ago-- not now. The genie's already out of the bottle at this point, and the association of the "Metro" name with Microsoft's tile-based UI is already extremely ubiquitous. I am shocked that Microsoft didn't open up their deep pockets and launch their massive war-fleet of IP lawyers to rain all hell upon Metro AG because of this point-- they seem to have a decent case supporting them. However, that is not what has happened, and Microsoft is suddenly back-peddling with its tail between its legs.

    What the heck has just happened? What makes Metro AG's case so terrifyingly strong to Microsoft? Now, I do understand that a country's Trademark laws and protections only apply to that particular country. That is why Apple was able to secure the "iPad" mark in many parts of the world, but still had some major trademark battles on their hands in the countries where the mark was already being used for similar products, such as in China. I am only familiar with U.S. trademark law, so maybe German trademark law has some fundamental differences in it that stacks the deck far in the favor of Metro AG? Is there anyone here who is familiar with German trademark law that could comment on this? In any case, I am truly amazed that a company as vast, wealthy, and powerful as Microsoft didn't either pay Metro AG to be able to use the mark, or put Metro AG through a pitched legal battle to fight for the use the mark, especially considering how much this effects Microsoft's flagship Windows product right as it is being released to manufacturers. There must be much more to this story, and I would be very interested to learn it.

    1. JoeF
      Thumb Down

      Re: I'm shocked that Microsoft isn't fighting for the use of the "Metro" trademark

      Lots of people, you included, get confused with the "Metro AG is a cash&carry shop" thing.

      They aren't. They started as a cash&carry shop, but nowadays they are the fifth-biggest retailer in the world, and own, besides cash&carry and grocery chains, consumer electronic chains. That's why they likely would have standing.

      1. Willie T

        Re: I'm shocked that Microsoft isn't fighting for the use of the "Metro" trademark

        Also consider the possibility that MS may have had a good case in court but decided it was not worth offending a (potentially) large customer.

  82. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Windows "husband"

    Because the bastard struggles to do more than one thing at a time.

  83. tempemeaty

    Windows 8 Oceania

    A guy named Orwell gave me the idea and it sounds almost as chic as Metro did. (-_^)

  84. WinHatter
    IT Angle

    “Windows 8 style UI”

    There you have it : W8UI

    pronounced Weight UI coz your pc is not going anywhere ... or Wet UI if looking at it makes you sob.

  85. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    New name

    How about Windows RIP (-off)

  86. Zot

    Windows Surf

    There. Done.

  87. William Old

    Another Microsoft "achievement"...

    "Microsoft executives are racking their brains for a new word to sum up the controversial user interface."

    Something not too dissimilar to "Metro", yet one that reflects Microsoft style, brand quality, and technical achievement...?

    Got it!

    Let's hear it for... MERDE!

  88. Dex

    So obvious

    They should have called it "Clippy's Revenge" and be done with it because, like Clippy, you want to kill it as viscerally and as quickly as possible.

  89. Willie T

    Such a display of business acumen!

    Amazing to me that Microsoft could be one of the most successful and valuable companies on the planet and yet in one fell swoop (Windows 8): fail to do any market research, completely fail on the design of their product, not pay any attention to what consumers or business wants in an O/S, miss the mark entirely on the direction of user interface and produce software that is slow, buggy and full of security holes all while spending tons of time and millions of dollars on development. Stunning!

    Or maybe the people posting comments here are a bunch of uninformed morons who will bash anything Microsoft does regardless of the good reviews, excellent performance benchmarks and glowing reports from security experts on Windows 8. Hmm, which scenario is more likely? I mean really, as much as you would all like to see them fail do you really believe everything you are saying? Or just going for cheap laughs?

  90. Montreal Sean

    How about...drum roll please...


    They are square (or rectangular) and sit in windows...

    Seems pretty obvious to me. :)

  91. Robredz

    Windoze 8?

    The interface may be fine and dandy for touch screen and tablet, but we are a way off ubiquity for office workers wandwering around with a tablet and headset in a corporate environment. take Housing management, or transport, they are just getting to grips with virtualisation and Windows 7, having loads of legacy apps that have 16 bit code that Win 7 won't run. The wannabee execs no doubt prance around with tablets, but in that market the fanbois want I-Pad, not a borked Windows tablet.

    Back to the penguin and Xubuntu, at least you can customise it it's quick, and hasn't got the Linux equivalent of Metro, Unity.

  92. Magnus_Pym


    because it looks like building blocks and it blocks you from doing what you want to. (and sounds a bit like bollocks).

  93. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    <blockquote>IMHO, they should consider co-branding it with Fisher Price.</blockquote>

    2001 called and wants its jokes back...

  94. kusuriya

    How come every time I look at Windows 8 with metro I see Microsoft Bob?

  95. This post has been deleted by its author

  96. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Windows Meh

    Shortening the name seems to be the solution here.

  97. Blast

    Dick headline, Reg :(

  98. Brazilian Joe

    How about a poll?

    Seriously, El Reg should make a poll to ask users what would be the best interface name to substitute Metro.

    The prize could be... A BlackBerry Playbook Tablet! Or just some kudos. Or perhaps a ride in a future LOHAN launch, to send the reader's ashes into orbit... once the reader dies, if El Reg and LOHAN are still around, disclaimers abound.

    If you are uninventive, you could get a Windows RT tablet for the reader once it becomes available. Or a future-yet-unnanounced Nokia Lumia sporting Windows Phone 8.

  99. JP19

    Windows PDE

    Bit late on the thread but

    Windows Phone Desktop Edition

    seems to fit the bill.

  100. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Rover replaced Metro with the 100.

    Perhaps MS could rename it Windows 100?

    Then every Register thread on Windows history will be full of comments "why 100 when it is really kernel version 7?"

This topic is closed for new posts.

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