Christians get God-optimized 'Edifi' Android fondleslab The tablet market is getting increasingly competitive these days, but an American company believes its offering may have a unique selling point: it's a fondleslab for the faithful. Dubbed the Edifi, the seven-inch device is billed as the first tablet computer designed specifically for Christians, and comes with streaming …
War crimes? No problemo!
After Joshua died, the Israelites asked the LORD, "Which tribe should attack the Canaanites first?" The LORD answered, "Judah, for I have given them victory over the land." The leaders of Judah said to their relatives from the tribe of Simeon, "Join with us to fight against the Canaanites living in the territory allotted to us. Then we will help you conquer your territory." So the men of Simeon went with Judah. When the men of Judah attacked, the LORD gave them victory over the Canaanites and Perizzites, and they killed ten thousand enemy warriors at the town of Bezek. While at Bezek they encountered King Adoni-bezek and fought against him, and the Canaanites and Perizzites were defeated. Adoni-bezek escaped, but the Israelites soon captured him and cut off his thumbs and big toes. Adoni-bezek said, "I once had seventy kings with thumbs and big toes cut off, eating scraps from under my table. Now God has paid me back for what I did to them." They took him to Jerusalem, and he died there. The men of Judah attacked Jerusalem and captured it, killing all its people and setting the city on fire. (Judges 1:1-8 NLT)
Then he (Samson) picked up a donkey's jawbone that was lying on the ground and killed a thousand Philistines with it.
On topic, although a Christian I do wonder sometimes at people who would buy these "christianised" devices. OK so some may like it as a sure way to get a known but far too often it's a way to pass off schlock.
You wrote:
"Moses was then told to carve a new set of tablets, and upon them God restored the sacred text files from what was presumably a celestial backup, thus retiring history's first recorded tablet tech-support ticket."
But if you read Exodus 34, the "celestial backup" is totally different from the original. It seems that even then tech-support messed up the backup files.
You mean god made mistakes in the first version of the tablets? This supposed "perfect" being is hardly omnipotent, then, right? (c.f. "creation" according to Genesis 1 v.s. Genesis 2.4 ... ).
(Yes, I've read the Bible (and Apocrypha) cover to cover, several times, in several languages, and many translations. I even have a degree in the subject. I'm not religious, I'm just interested in what little written info exists from that era and earlier. Humanity forgets mistakes, and we are doomed to repeat them. See the current situation in the middle east ... and I'm not saying any one side is "right". All the religions involved are in the wrong, IMO, including Wall Street. Organized religion is the root of all evil.)
"You mean god made mistakes in the first version of the tablets?"
Gosh, what a terrible thing to say.
The mark 1 tablets were surely perfect for their time, but expectations had advanced. The mark 2s had rounder corners and were carved into thinner slabs, presumably in a whiter shade of alabaster or somesuch. The bible does not comment whether the text was chiselled in by an army of asian cherubim, however.
In unrelated news, I hear Samsung's board been will be to eat the blended carcass of a Galaxy 3 when the current raft of court cases comes to a close.
Tears of mirth.
South Park piss-take of Mormons, Joseph Smith using two stones in a hat, Urim and Thummim to read them.
You'll look it up, haven't time to write, but...(Background vocals)
"Dum-Dum-Dum-Dum-Dum"
Until Smith's witness' wife, the former to whom Smith delivered the 'translation' had a 'cunning plan'
"Smart-Smart-Smart-Smart-Smart".
The replacements were of course, different.
Pissed Isaac Hayes off. Right off!!!!
I can presume the due to the "Power of God", this thing won't need a battery or has an eternal charge.
I can imagine the scenario where the proverbial pair of Mormons come to your door holding one if these Holy Tablet's.
Will the Church hand them out for free, I might be worth turning up to Sunday School or whatever they call it.
Those of the Jewish faith I presume will know where to "get a good deal" on one.
We could have an animated bible , with the parting of the Red Sea on live, or the plague of Locusts, "as it actually happened".
What a wonderful marketing tool. ( Wait a minute ...............)
Uh, Thorne ... I think that over time, the Christians have exploded more ordinance[1] than the Muslims. Probably by more than six orders of magnitude, over the last 10 centuries or so. I suspect that the Jewish side of the picture is around two orders of magnitude ahead of Islam since the establishment of Eretz-Israel in 1948 ...
One god? My ass ... One GreatUnwashedIgnorantSheeple, more like.
[1] On a "damage done" basis, not count of individual firecrackers/bangers ... AK47s are amazingly capable of going through massive quantities of ammunition without actually doing any damage.
"Uh, Thorne ... I think that over time, the Christians have exploded more ordinance[1] than the Muslims. "
Ah yes but they're the ones strapping a bomb to their ass at the moment so all bomb jokes will be directed at them. When the Buddists start blowing themselves instead of the Muslims the target of bomb jokes will move.
Actually we should start a list of all the religious features.
The Christian one is child friendly, very friendly
The Islamic one explodes
The Jewish one is on sale
The Buddist one use to be an iPad in a previous life
"Thorne
Mushroom
Reply Icon
Re: Battery is optional
"Those of the Jewish faith I presume will know where to "get a good deal" on one."
------
I suppose if the group you belonged to had historically been barred from all occupations except money-lending and peddling, and even from these at times, you might be able to find a good deal on sthg as well.
27 streamed Bible versions is not that impressive. The YouVersion app on my HP Touchpad can stream 29 translations of the Bible into English, plus many more in other languages. The app is available for many other mobile platforms (indeed I also have it on my Android phone). Now 27 *offline* versions would be more impressive, as translations of the Bible tend either to be expensive to get offline, or pretty fringe translations. But this just mentions streaming. (Curiously the Touchpad YouVersion app just allows streaming, but the Android app has some offline versions - not ones most people have heard of, apart from the King James Version, though.)
Basically this is just a standard tablet with a bit of branding. Might be decent, might be rubbish. But the same thing could be done in any number of areas.
...like a rash. Are those corners rounded? Are they (gasp)......icons? Guilty! Bring it on - Apple vs the Supreme Deity Himself. But which one is best? There's only one way to find out........ FIGHT!!!!
Oh but I already know the outcome - Apple fail because this particular iPad wannabe is clearly a LOT less cool than the iPad.
"Google has somewhat crippled their marketing plan by announcing the Nexus 7 tablet, which is more highly specced than anything else at the same price point"
Except this is $149, wasn't the 8GB Nexus 7 $199?
The main downpoint of this (aside from the crippled censored browser) seems to be still running Android 2.3, but price-wise, I don't think it's unreasonable that it has lower spec, when it's so much cheaper. And if it has microSD as someone pointed out, then if you want 16GB the price difference will be even greater (since the cost of an 8GB microSD card, or even 16GB or 32GB, is hardly anything).
1. perpetuate itself - Go forth and multiply;
2. put the fear of god into people to...
3. make them do what you want them to do (otherwise they'll burn in hell);
4. play on peoples fear of the unknown, death, etc (foir the same purpose);
5. make money (especially in the US). "Praise the Lord and send us your money."
Clearly Exodus 34:28 and Deuteronomy 9:18 are scribal interpolations. Had the scribes who wrote those verses ever tried going without water for much more than a week (or two or three days in a hot desert land) they'd have suffered irreversible renal failure. Since Moses was a prophet, he would have foreseen this catastrophic result and brought many litres of water with him in jerry cans to survive.
The Register 
Biting the hand that feeds IT
Copyright. All rights reserved © 1998–2024
