back to article Got no idea what Hadoop is, but think you need it? You're not alone

Hadoop is quickly becoming essential infrastructure for enterprises hoping to glean insights from the massive quantities of data they collect. The problem is that relatively few enterprises have the necessary competence to make effective use of the still-complex open-source project. While Hadoop vendors like Cloudera, …


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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    A meteoric rise from 0 to 0.1%. Essential infrastructure my hole.

    1. Tom Maddox Silver badge


      It looks like it peaked out at 0.15%, which is almost 0.2% if you round the least significant digit. Of course, that last bit in the chart does make it look as though it's coming down from 0.15%, so perhaps 0.1% is closer to the current mark.

      On the other hand, I typically round .1% to, you know, 0.

    2. toughluck

      Given that is a global site, and contains many more jobs in other sectors than IT, it's a big deal.

      Even if it is not a huge percentage within IT, it's still significant.

      Compared to other IT jobs, which include programming where the basic skill is a language, then there are generic IT jobs where no skills are required, web coding where you'll find the usual fare of CSS and PHP, Hadoop will be a significant part of the remainder of critical jobs -- like mainframe or Unix administration -- it might seem archaic for some, but it brings a lot of money.

      Not everyone will have to know Hadoop inside-out, but those who do, and whose skills are required, will rake in the big cash.

  2. Yves Kurisaki


    What is Hadoop then.

    I still don't know.

    1. frank ly

      Re: So..?

      Here's a starter for you :)

      1. Rameses Niblick the Third (KKWWMT)

        Re: So..?

        I'm not finding that massively helpful to be honest. Why do I feel like the Cat in the Red Dwarf episode "Stasis Leak"?

        CAT: (to RIMMER) What IS it?

        RIMMER: It's a rent in the space-time continuum.

        CAT: (to LISTER) What IS it?

        LISTER: The stasis room freezes time, you know, makes time stand still.

        So whenever you have a leak, it must preserve whatever it's leaked

        into, and it's leaked into this room.

        CAT: (to RIMMER) What IS it?

        RIMMER: It's singularity, a point in the universe where the normal laws

        of space and time don't apply.

        CAT: (to LISTER) What IS it?

        LISTER: It's a hole back into the past.

        CAT: Oh, a magic door! Well, why didn't you say?

        Can someone give a relatively straight forward explanation of this for those of us who seem to be hard of thinking on this issue?

        And yes, I do mean me.

        1. philbo

          Re: So..?

          It's a way of doing stuff somewhere, acting on data stored wherever, sending the results anywhere; because of the level at which it's tiered, it's not so much "cloud" as "fog"

          (Does that make sense? If so, anyone got any hadoop jobs going?)

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: So..?

          It's a magic thingy to make your internets faster. Maybe.

    2. Tom Maddox Silver badge

      Re: So..?

      A stuffed elephant? Not sure whether that's literal or metaphorical, though.

  3. Kristian Walsh Silver badge

    "We need to show leadership...

    ... so I want all our purchasing and ERP systems re-written in the Hadoop before the next Board meeting"

    I'm tired of this bubble. What do you think the next one is going to be?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: "We need to show leadership...

      "What do you think the next one is going to be?"

      Probably an AI system that invents products for investor bubbles.

      Or is that too recursive?

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It doesn't matter what Hadoop is ...

    .. what it does (if anything) or if you even need it (doubtful). You must order 10 of them now - it goes nicely with MongoDB.

  5. Anonymous Coward

    Got no idea what Hadoop is

    And I still haven't. So thanks for nothing.

    Reminds me of a certain era of IBM marketing literature, which used to arrive on my desk regularly. Pages and pages of glossy stuff telling me how vital something was for my business, which would surely fail without it. Invariably, I reached the end of the brochure thinking, Yes, but, for god's sake, what is it? What does it do?

    Oh, and yes, I did ask Wikipedia in the end.

  6. bep

    Well on the tin it says:

    (Well, on the project home page anyway):

    "The Apache™ Hadoop™ project develops open-source software for reliable, scalable, distributed computing.

    The Apache Hadoop software library is a framework that allows for the distributed processing of large data sets across clusters of computers using a simple programming model. It is designed to scale up from single servers to thousands of machines, each offering local computation and storage. Rather than rely on hardware to deliver high-avaiability, the library itself is designed to detect and handle failures at the application layer, so delivering a highly-availabile (sic) service on top of a cluster of computers, each of which may be prone to failures.

    The project includes these subprojects: la la la"

    So don't ask me, What businesses of many kinds need is to provide the people making the decisions with accurate information about what is happening in the business now, as well as what is happening in the market the business is in. If this Hadoop thingy can help do this, then it should be useful. If it just provides another layer of obfuscation, then not so much.

  7. saundby

    Think JDBC for the cloud.

    A programming framework for data analysis that, to a large degree, hides the fact that it's distributed through the underlying tech it uses to do its job. Inaccurate, but it might be a useful mischaracterization. ;)

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