back to article Vote now for the juiciest LOHAN backronym

The El Reg Special Projects Bureau has wasted quite enough time faffing about with the name of our audacious high altitude, helium-assisted ballocket adventure, so it's time to nail this one once and for all. To recap, our plan is to launch a rocket-powered composite aircraft from beneath a helium balloon at a not …


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  1. Anonymous Coward

    Firing up my botnet now....

    Free poutine? Just for casting multiple votes? Yes please!

    1. dotdavid


      Any chance of having a Parmo instead? I think I'd much prefer that.

      Although a parmo-poutine combo wouldn't be sniffed at.

      1. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

        Re: Poutine?

        Sure, we'll offer a menu, and also a choice of whether Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton or Natalie Portman will serve you your choice while dressed in nothing more then a strategically-placed fried Mars bar. Any other requests?

        1. Anonymous Coward

          "Any other requests?"

          A few chilled beers please.

        2. sT0rNG b4R3 duRiD

          Natalie Portman

          will do nicely, please.

        3. Jedit Silver badge

          FOIA request

          Is it Vladimir Poutine?

    2. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

      Re: Firing up my botnet now....


    3. JimC

      Not any old poutine...

      I imagine this will be the BOFH's "special" poutine...

  2. Anonymous Coward


    Just the wrong word :(

    1. Thomas 4

      For all those whining about the "orbit" part

      What, you'd rather have something like "High Up Rocket Propelled Dirgible Elevated Register Plane?"

      1. Anonymous Coward

        Rather Have..

        erm how about one of the suggested options that is actually accurate. I presume you can read them all. May I suggest "Lightweight Observational High Altitude Navigator" is slightly more appropriate than "High Up Rocket Propelled Dirgible Elevated Register Plane" and does not have that wrong orbit word in it...

  3. Dr. Mouse


    Why are the most popular so far the 3 starting with "Low Orbit"? I doubt it will be entering orbit. If it's anything like PARIS it'll get very high, but not into orbit!

    1. Lester Haines (Written by Reg staff) Gold badge

      Re: Why?!

      Our Paper Aircraft Released Into Space didn't actually get into space, either, but it's not really that important, is it? As my son would say: "Chillax, old timer."

  4. Prof

    Oribit my arse

    Change the Low Orbit ones!

    There were better options in the shortlist

  5. JesterFeckwit

    Extra onions and hold the tomato please...

    I'd vote for "Low Orbit Helium Assisted Nanoplane"... if it were an option...

  6. Southern
    Thumb Up

    Re: re: Poutine?

    Ooh la la!

    Lester, you are spoiling us!

  7. This post has been deleted by its author

  8. Harvey Trowell
    Thumb Up

    Low orbit it is!

    What's the saying... Nobody ever went broke underestimating the something of the commentard something?

    Now. To the lab please. And hence to low orbit. And beyond!

  9. Anonymous Coward


    Any reference to orbits is somewhat optimistic surely?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Or pedantic

      Since you can orbit the earth on a hovercraft as long as you don't run out of power. Or find something better to do or whatever.

      1. Captain DaFt


        We're all in orbit right now!

        The Earth revolves, therefore I can claim geostationary orbit from the comfort of my easy chair!

        (icon shows primary refueling source.)

  10. Stu Wilson


    I know La Lohan is notorious for flashing beaver, but being under the ballon and seeing up the skirts has probably got to be easier than trying for the money shots

  11. Alan Esworthy

    I got your title right HERE

    Sorry I didn't get in on the initial suggestions. I'd have offered

    Ludicrously Overreaching but Heroic and Artful Nearspacecraft

  12. jr424242

    disappointing choices.

    This should give you good liability cover, has the virtue of modesty, and makes a bow to Computer Science.

    LOHAN's Only a Helium Assisted Nanoplane

    or, nearly evanescing entirely

    LOHAN's Only a Hardly Adequate Name

    1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson
      Thumb Up


      In true GNU style recursive acronyms should be prefered.

  13. wetfish

    I'm with jr424242

    How about Jet Under Balloon Ship?

    Ok, send the poutine over.

  14. Anonymous Coward

    Sod the spaceships

    This poutine stuff sounds good.

  15. Anonymous Coward

    I voted wrong.

    Dammit, I was so tempted by the reference to helium that I went for it without thinking, but now I really do think about it, PARIS was "Paper Airplane Released Into Space", so I guess LOHAN really ought to have been the "Launch Of High Altitude Nanoplane" option. Can I change my mind now?

    Or even better, if I do, will you think I'm cheating and give me poutine?

  16. Anonymous Coward

    You sir have inspired me!

    These are truly awful There has got to be a better LOHAN and I'll spam your form with......

    ....... errr....Wow Lohan is truly awful....I think ill be off now

  17. Martin Budden

    Not low orbit!

    It's NOT going into orbit! So that totally rules out three of the options.

  18. Jim Keir
    Black Helicopters

    And by the way,

    ... isn't that plane in the pic remarkably similar to the one used in Microprose's F19 flight sim some decades ago?

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