back to article Brit expats aghast as Denmark bans Marmite

Marmite-loving Brit expats living in Denmark have expressed their shock and dismay at the government's decision to ban the legendary yeast-based spread, on the grounds that it contains "too many vitamins". The Danish Veterinary and Food Administration has invoked a 2004 law concerning nosh "fortified with added vitamins". …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Love it!

    Not banned in France:)

    1. Nev Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Too right...

      ... even Carrefour sells it.

      And Hula Hoops too!

      1. anarchic-teapot
        Go

        And... and...

        Baked beans, an' Polo Mints, an' gingernuts! I even saw Irn Bru once. Intermarché sells jellies around here, all I need for torturing the natives.

        Seriously, we need to set up a Black Ops team, smuggling the salty nectar of yeasty yumminess to our beleaguered compatriots in Hamlet-land under cover of Schengen.

        Cryptic messages delivered over the radio, WWII style, could alert our contacts to the point of delivery. We shall have to adopt codenames, of course, so that if one of us is caught by a minion of the Danish authorities, they cannot give away the others' names, even under torture (such as being forced to listen to Lars von Triers' 'jokes' for hours en end).

        Britons, arise! The very basis of our freedom is being threatened! They will not control us!

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Troll

          Foreign nosh

          It's amusing to see what French supermarkets stock in the "foreign foods" bit. The UK section invariably contains Branston Pickle, Roses Lime Marmalade, HP Sauce and McVitie's digestives.

          Marmite, on the other hand, could justifiably be classed in the toxic waste section...

  2. Matthew Smith
    FAIL

    Highlights the usefulness of the EU actually

    When you turn up at the borders of lonely Latvia with this unknown toxic concoction, they know its actually decent because the EU says so. They don't have to ban it first until they carry out their own tests.

    Denmark are allowed to then implement their own laws. If they decided to ban it, then were overruled by the EU and had to allow it after all, THEN something would be very wrong.

    1. Marvin the Martian

      Daily Mail dislikes this then?

      I didn't expect the Daily Fail to be against the rights of a state (Denmark, or the UK) to NOT follow a dictat from Brussels.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Win

    Loads of free advertising for Marmite here. I cant imagine they sold much of it in Denmark anyway - its not fishy enough.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      @AC

      Yeah - it's strange how an adman and a graphic designer are the only ones commenting about this?

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    "What am I supposed to put on my toast now?"

    Something edible?

    1. CmdrX3
      Happy

      Thanks

      That's my morning laugh sorted out. Strange how two simple words can really brighten your day.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Happy

        snurk

        'tis funny

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      RE: Something edible

      I'm upvoting you for that. Personally I prefer SKUB.

      http://www.pbfcomics.com/?cid=PBF020-Skub.gif

  5. JeffUK
    Thumb Up

    If there are protests about this..

    The news footage will look exactly like a Marmite advert, I bet their marketting department are loving this, even if the sales people aren't!

  6. David Hicks

    Fortified with vitamins and iron!

    Have they banned cornflakes too?

    1. This post has been deleted by a moderator

      1. Chris Miller
        Paris Hilton

        @Johnypanic

        Nah, Paris is more like Bran Flakes: "Tasty, tasty, very very tasty"

        1. liquidphantom
          Paris Hilton

          @Chris Miller and Jonypanic

          I think she is more like Marmite than anything else. Love her or hate her, she is easy to spread.

          1. Figgus
            Paris Hilton

            Re: @Chris Miller and Jonypanic

            "I think she is more like Marmite than anything else. Love her or hate her, she is easy to spread."

            Not to mention all the yeast...

    2. Buzzword

      Yes

      Click through to the Guardian link in the article, and you'll find this telling phrase:

      "Food giant Kellogg's withdrew some brands of breakfast cereal from Denmark when the legislation passed in 2004."

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Retaliation.

    How about a ban on Toksvig-based imports?

    1. a cynic writes...

      Might be difficult...

      Considering her mum's English.

  8. SW

    Bovril on toast is far better

    And I've not heard of it being banned... Although having just looked at the ingredients I expect it won't be long until the Danes get it wrong again.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    daily mash

    <quote Yorkshire-born graphic designer Lyndsay Jensen, resident in Copenhagen, reckons the clampdown is less about excess vitamins, and more to do with simple culinary xenophobia. She splendidly thundered: "They don't like it because it's foreign. But if they want to take my Marmite off me, they'll have to wrench it from my cold dead hands." />

    I could have sworn I was reading the daily mash for a moment there...

  10. Naich

    The Mail

    So the Mail is complaining that the EU can't force one of its laws onto a country that has unilaterally decided against it? There's consistency for you.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Unhappy

      F*ck the Daily Mail, and all who read it.

      The consistency is having a dig at the EU. For whatever reason they can make up.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        While i agree with your 'fuck the mail' line.

        I sometimes browse it when issues like this crop up just to laugh at the hys comments.

        Currently the readership is torn between being angry at foreigners or selfishly glad because they don't like it, and obviously everything they don't like shouldn't exist.

        Reminds me of the student protests "bloody students, why aren't they out protesting about things /i/ care about".

      2. John Hughes
        Thumb Down

        Daily fail...

        Day 1: Marmite causes cancer.

        Day 2: Marmite cures cancer.

        Day 3: EU overrules British law!

        Day 4: EU fails to overrule silly Foreign law!

        (Actually you could get all these stories the same day).

        1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge

          (Actually you could get all these stories the same day).

          On the same page, side by side

        2. Marvin the Martian
          Flame

          And what same day would that be?

          All these articles appearing together? The singularity! Maybe on Oct 21. When the rapture will again fail to happen (or fail to involve a noticeable number of Xtians).

          Next day, DM: "olive-skinned prophet J.C. (age 2016), of no fixed abode but formerly of Nazareth, AGAIN FAILS TO MAKE GOOD".

  11. Giddy Kipper

    What amused me ...

    ... is the fact that the scientist who first discovered this lovely product whilst working for the brewery around 1900 is the great grandfather of a relative of mine.

    He was Danish.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Wasn't he German

      "When German scientist, Liebig discovered that brewer's yeast cells could be concentrated, bottled and eaten, Marmite was as close to being invented as it's possible to be, without actually having being invented..."

      http://www.marmite.com/love/history/birth-of-marmite.html

      1. TheOtherHobbbes
        WTF?

        Sounds like

        an Apple product.

        Apple? Marmite?

        Okay. Fine. Never mind.

        1. Naughtyhorse

          that would be

          MARMiTE

  12. Doc Dish
    WTF?

    Wait, whut?!

    They're banning it because it has 'too many' vitamins? Admittedly it's been a while since I was at University, but aren't excess vitamins simply excreted?

    1. Loyal Commenter Silver badge
      Boffin

      It depends...

      ...on whether they are water soluble vitamins (like vitamin C), or fat soluble ones (like vitamin A). An huge dose of vit C is likely to just give youy diarrhoea (and possibly kidney troubles), whereas a huge dose of vitamin A would make your skin peel off, and cause liver failure, leading to death. As fdar as I am aware, Marmite, being made from the excess yeast from the brewing industry, is high in B vitamins, of thse B3 (Niacin) and B6 are potentially dangerous in high doses. Of course, to get a high enough dose of these to be harmful from Marmite, your salt intake would probably have killed you first.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      only the water soluble

      only water soluble vitamins are excreted. a,d,e and k vitamins are not

    3. Nigel 11
      Boffin

      Excreted?

      Some vitamin excesses are excreted or metabolised, some aren't. The ones that aren't can build up to dangerously toxic levels. I think I've read of people dying of chronic massive Vitamin D overdosing. Vitamin A is supplemented as beta-carotene rather than the vitamin, because the body turns carotene into vitamin A as needed, but can't get rid of a surplus of the actual vitamin.

      The B vitamins (in Marmite) are excreted. In fact your body can't maintain a stockpile, so Marmite on toast every day is likely a good thing (but watch your salt intake). Tastes nice too!

      Danes should be able to buy Marmite by mail order from another EU country. It would be against EU rules to block such imports (as well as totally impractical).

      The Danes are being inconsistent. Vitamin C is also known by its E-number. It's commonly added to a huge range of foods as an anti-oxidant preservative (in quite small amounts compared to eating an Orange, let alone a Kiwi fruit, but even so, it is an added vitamin suppplement! )

    4. Neil Hoskins
      Boffin

      No

      Too much vitamin A causes osteoporosis, which is a problem in Denmark because of all the herring they eat. I think this is a case of the Danes being ahead of the rest of us, and we'll probably start to see warnings on anything with added vitamins and, indeed, the mega-vitamin quack pills available off the shelf.

    5. Ivar Petersen

      Never banned

      Marmite has never been "banned" as such. Under Danish legislation, vitamins on their own or added to other substances qualifies as drugs - not food. Drugs requires licenses to be freely sold, as I am pretty sure they do in the UK. So the basic issue is: When/if you add vitamins to a substance in Denmark it makes it a drug, in the UK not.

      I am actually quite happy someone keeps an eye on what snakeoilsalesman sell.

      So this is a PR campaign orchestrated by the manufacturers and distributors. You think? No shit Sherlock :)

      (Yes, I am a dane living in sick porn producing, Toksvig xporting, Lars von Trier and Hitler supporting Marmite banning Denmark)

  13. MJI Silver badge

    Buy British Bacon & Megablocks

    Much better quality meat

    Megablocks is as good as Lego

    BTW I hate Marmite

    1. Anonymous Coward
      WTF?

      Re: "Megablocks is as good as Lego"

      Are they bollocks!

      1. MJI Silver badge

        Bollocks

        Never seen any made from any type of toy brick.

        My children have a large lot of the stuff - no real difference between BTR Lego or Megablocks

    2. foo_bar_baz
      Thumb Down

      Shoe on other foot

      It's all "yay" when the UK does a one-up on the EU but all "boo" when another country does it?

    3. Oliver Mayes

      Blasphemy

      Megablocks are bought exclusively by parents who don't really love their children.

    4. ravenviz
      Happy

      Re: Megablocks

      What about sticklebricks?

      Oh to be a child again.

      1. Thomas 4

        You goddamn whippersnappers

        Go away and let me play with my Meccano!

  14. Brennan Young
    IT Angle

    Fortified foods

    ... including - yes - some breakfast cereals, but also vegemite, ovaltine, horlicks, certain cough sweets etc. are forbidden in Denmark because the authorities are worried that the food industry will fortify unhealthy products (such as sugary soft drinks or potato crisps/chips) and then sell them as health foods.

    In theory it sort of makes sense, if you are a bureaucrat with one eye on the public health budget, but in practice the law hits very wide of the mark. Meanwhie Danes (like the rest of Europe and especially USA) still guzzle thousands of litres of sugary soda, which enjoys plenty of advertising exposure, even on kids' tv - despite regular reports about how harmful it is. Not to mention the unhealthy amounts of pork, and dearth of vegetables, in the typical Danish diet.

    The ban applies to sales, and possibly also wholesale import of all fortified foods. Possession and importation for personal use is not covered by this particular law. The same ban was introduced in Norway some years ago, but now it is legal to sell Marmite again there as long as it is sold as a vitamin supplement, rather than a foodstuff.

    I live in Denmark, I love marmite and I think this law is utterly stupid. Don't get me started on the stupid Danish restrictions on over-the-counter medications.

  15. This post has been deleted by its author

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Joke

      Ah

      Appeaser... Quisling... (etc)

  16. BristolBachelor Gold badge

    Spain

    It's available in Carrefour here, not that I'd buy it! (However they have just started selling Branston pickle!)

    By the way it is contra-indicated with some medications and medical conditions...

  17. Havin_it
    Dead Vulture

    Come on, a bit of balance!

    50% of ex-pats are up in arms. The other 50% vigorously applaud the move, and you know it.

    As for having to "wrench it from [her] cold dead hands", this could be quite a challenge if it's been removed from the jar, right enough.

    Black market? Very dark brown market, shurely...

    1. Chris Harrison
      Unhappy

      Applaud it?

      Why would 50% applaud it?

      Surely marmite being legal doesn't mean you have to buy it?

      Next you'll be saying that if there is smut on TV you are forced to watch it.

      1. jonathanb Silver badge

        Re: Why applaud it?

        Because it is about time that that vile disgusting waste by-product from the production of beer was banned.

        1. Chris Harrison
          FAIL

          Now I understand

          @jonathanb - Ok so you don't like marmite.

          I don't like tomatos and bannanas screw up my digestive system. Perhaps I should ask for those to be banned.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Pint

          Tarry horror

          I don't quite believe this by-product of beer story. Marmite bears an uncomfortable resemblance to dog's earwax. Stick your finger in a (cooperative) dog's ear and try it. It's only that I'm not sure there are enough dogs having their ears scraped to account for all those jars in the shops. Maybe it's a second career for redundant foxhounds or something.

      2. Arkasha
        Stop

        @Chris Harrison

        "Next you'll be saying that if there is smut on TV you are forced to watch it."

        Shhhh! I've been telling the wife it's illegal to not watch smut on TV. If she finds out I'm for it!

  18. Thomas 18
    Joke

    Underground Marmite Running

    Ahoy

    1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
      Pirate

      Requires different icon

      <--- more appropriate.

      ARRH

      1. The First Dave Silver badge
        Pirate

        untitled

        Well, I guess I know what I'm going to be doing this summer, but don't anyone tell the excise!

    2. Lamont Cranston

      Is that a euphemism

      for something, err, unsavoury?

  19. Isendel Steel
    Flame

    Sauce....

    for the goose is good for the gander

    Ban Danissshhh bacon !!

    (flame for cooking obviously)

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Get a pharmacy to supply it

    as a "supplement."

  21. Alistair Wall

    Excess vitamins

    Excess water-soluble vitamins are excreted. Vitamins A and D accumulate in the liver, which is why you can get vitamin A poisoning from eating polar bear liver.

    1. hplasm Silver badge
      Coat

      But has Denmark banned

      Polarbear liver?

      Probably not...

  22. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Big Brother

    Pointless make-work by the tax feeding legal professionals.

    But it's good to know that Nanny State is looking out for you.

    Now pick up that can!

  23. Citizen Kaned
    Welcome

    hmmmm

    to anyone in denmark: i can poo in a jar and send you it. it might not smell as bad as marmite but it will taste similar :)

    ive never understood how people can eat it. it smells worse than my dog's poo! who was the nutter who first thought 'ohh this smells terrible and looks like poo, wonder how it tastes?'

    1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge

      Terry Pratchett knows

      It was concocted late at night under the influence of large quantities of beer. You know, the same school of culinary thought that gave us deep-fried pizza.

      (See "The Last Continent")

    2. TheOtherHobbbes
      Paris Hilton

      And, er...

      "it might not smell as bad as marmite but it will taste similar :)"

      ...you know this how?

    3. The Fuzzy Wotnot
      Happy

      Booo! Save the "black-butter"!

      Eating it since I was "knee-high to a grasshoppers eye", aged 40 and still eating it!

      My Missus loves it and so do my kids, it's called "black-butter" in our house.

      We even cook with it! Pasta, sausages, mince, tomatoes, pasta sauce, topped off with cheese and the miracle "black-butter" warmed and drizzled over the mixture and then baked for 40 mins. Add chilli flakes before eating, out of this f**king world!

      1. Marvin the Martian
        Flame

        Please don't invite me to your house!

        Or actually, please give me your address so I can avoid the Cuisine of Misfortune.

      2. peter 45
        Happy

        Mmmmmmmmmmmmm

        Speciality of Greenland. Potatoes, parboiled, tossed in marmite and then roasted. Marvelous.

      3. Lamont Cranston
        Unhappy

        Oh, lord.

        I love Marmite, but it can only be consumed when spread on toast, on it's own (almost, the butter is a given).

        Doing anything else with it (except, perhaps, enhancing a stock) is appalling. I added it to beans on toast, once, and found out why so many people hate it.

  24. JohnG Silver badge

    Personal use?

    Are the penalties reduced if you smuggle in some Marmite for personal use? If so, I guess the wife and kids will have to smuggle their own.

    Interesting law though: you can't import food containing extra vitamins but I guess they have not banned the import of tobacco....

  25. ViagraFalls
    Grenade

    INVADE DENMARK!

    Please. I'm not British, nor do I like marmite, but for sanity's sake, please force these people to stick to speaking English instead of doing their Swedish Chef impression. That'll also allow us to get rid of these damn Danish keyboards that are hell for coders. Heck, there's only 6 million people living here, and other than them and a few Polar Bears (Which Al Gore assured us are doomed anyway), bloody nobody knows or wants to know Danish.

    1. Peter Gathercole Silver badge

      Polar Bears in Denmark? Maybe in zoos!

      Have I missed something, or is your grasp of geography a bit weak?

      1. Captain DaFt
        Linux

        You missed something rather large

        Greenland is part of the Kingdom of Denmark, there's quite a few Polar bears there.

        No penguins though, so here's one.

        1. Peter Gathercole Silver badge

          Yes, but

          Greenland is an autonomous country, has it's own parliament, and is not part of the EU. Thus I was not counting it as part of Denmark the country.

          As a result, I'm would be surprised if the ban on Marmite applies.

          Point taken, though.

  26. Elmer Phud
    Boffin

    Arms are up in protest

    No, not 'up in arms' - I'm boycotting Danish porn.

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    About time somebody thought of the children!

    This is a good start.

    Hopefully they will ban foodstuffs with other nasties (dihydrogen monoxide, all fats, all salt, all sugars etc) and then die out like Darwin suggested....

  28. Tim Worstal

    Vitamins

    The ban is not on vitamin rich, it's on vitamin added. And it's B12 which is added to Marmite and as above, the salt content would kill you before you could possibly OD on B12.

    1. Pigeon

      B12

      I only started eating Marmite for the B12, which is supposed to be rare in a vegan diet. This news prompted me to pop round to Jim Sainsbury's emporium, where I bought a Marmite 'XO' (extra old). While I was at it, I got Branston, Colemans mustard, and hot pepper sauce, just in case of a shortage. I bet dogs would eat it.

  29. cupperty
    Joke

    old joke (forgotten who) ...

    "I won a year's supply of Marmite .... one jar!"

    1. Linbox
      FAIL

      ... lifetime ...

      Not year. That's the joke, right there in the one word you messed up.

  30. Neill Mitchell

    Those Danes eh

    You either love them or hate them ;)

  31. ppp.an
    Alert

    supplements

    Did they also ban vitamin pills? ^^

  32. Paul_Murphy

    At last the defence review makes sense.

    High-speed marmite deliveries using tornados and typhoons, sneaking under the radar and precision-dropping the jars onto (the correct) danish tables.

    Hmm - if they were using buccaneers I could believe that, but the modern stuff needs to keep too high to do much sneaking.

    ttfn

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Black Helicopters

      OT: Buccaneers

      As you say; I used to watch them leaving the airfield, wondering if they'd actually gain enough altitude to make it over the hedge on perimeter.

      Ah yes, those were the days.... Buccaneers - possibly the first and only aircraft to use diesel fuel in a jet engine.

      1. bazza Silver badge

        It's a good idea

        Made sense to use diesel fuel. There's a lot of that on ships!

  33. ppp.an
    Megaphone

    revenge

    Boycott the Danes' bacon in Britain.

  34. Big Al
    FAIL

    Mozart

    "Too many notes, my dear Mozart"... and we know how well *that* judgement has withstood the test of time...

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    britishcornershop.co.uk

    has (ten varieties of) Marmite available, and will deliver to Danmark

    (other online shops may be available)

    1. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

      Oooh

      They have those Marmite cashews. I can highly recommend.

      1. peter 45
        Happy

        Ooo ooo ooo

        Marmite crisps. Wow.

  36. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

    I have to say...

    ...I never understood the 'hate marmite' thing. If you don't like it, don't eat it.

    There are a number of foodstuffs I'm not particularly fond of. Do you know what I do about it? That's right - I don't eat them.

    Personally, I like the taste of marmite, but then I also like the taste of other yeast products, like beer, and I've yet to find anything else that makes an adequate gravy seasoning / colourant.

  37. Rob 5

    other online shops may be available

    Is the ban restricted to the sale of the product, or does it also cover importation? If the former, go for it, if the latter, you might be entering something of a customs lottery.

    We're OK for Marmite (in the USA) but we can't get Bovril. Found a few e-tailers offering to ship it from the UK, so got in touch with them and asked what the deal was with it making it through customs. The answer was, they'll guarantee to ship it, but they make no guarantee that customs will allow it into the country.

  38. Dan P
    WTF?

    Erm, are you sure?

    According to the Danish government, they haven't banned it, but they haven't had an application to sell it in Denmark from Marmite either...

    http://www.amblondon.um.dk/NR/exeres/8A56692E-1780-495E-8176-F0E366653F52,frameless.htm?NRMODE=Published

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      and why would you need an application

      In a free market, especially one that encompasses a Community of European Economies.

      Bonus anti-Danissssh anecdote

      My father (being of rural origins) while in Denmark asked a farmer what breed of pigs he kept - the farmer was not able to answer.

      By comparison, my cousin keeps older breeds of pigs and the bacon is great - doesn't shrink under the grill, or exude white gloop while frying.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        re: doesn't shrink under the grill, or exude white gloop

        ITYF that has more to do with the processing of the meat than anything else.

  39. jake Silver badge

    Love the stuff.

    Nothing better on toasted San Francisco sourdough ...

    Suggestion to Danes: Protest by buying Irish butter for your toast ;-)

  40. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    It's not as if Danish bacon is any good / better...

    It's not as if Danish bacon is any good / better - it's just been marketed - try some proper UK produced bacon instead.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Well

      What the UK classes as "Danish Bacon" is very hard to come by in Denmark. I moved to here from England nearly a year ago and have yet to see one shop that sells it. No doubt you could get a butcher to cut it for you but it's nearly all exported.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Thumb Up

        Marketing

        Like Irish butter. You'll find Kerrygold in every country in the world - except Ireland.

        And Stella Artois. Sold as posh expensive lager in the UK, and as cheap plonk in Belgium.

        And let's not start on Liebfraumilch, which the Germans have never heard of.

        1. bazza Silver badge

          Piat d'or?

          Have seen it in France, and far enough away from the channel ports to probably not be aimed at the booze cruiser.

  41. Anonymous Coward
    Megaphone

    Buy quality bacon...

    Buy quality bacon - not the cr@p that is full or hormones / water.

    I don't get why people would buy New Zealand lamb either - it's no better than Welsh or other UK lamb but with almost 12000 food miles attached to it. Perhaps it's cheaper as they have so many.

  42. copsewood
    Heart

    Babette's Feast

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Babette%27s_Feast

    Nothing to do with Marmite, but a wonderful film with a passion for good food explaining how restrictive tastes and suffocating superstitions of a Danish religious community are gloriously and sacrificially redeemed.

    1. lawndart

      says:

      But it would have been EVEN BETTER with Marmite.

  43. StefanPolscher
    IT Angle

    Make it at home.

    If the price of beer in Denmark is as high as I hear it is then expats would be well advised to homebrew beer. They could then use the leftovers to make their own marmite.

    1. Pigeon

      Yeast extract is tricky to make

      I kno, cos I saw it on someones telly. I think the salt breaks open the yeast cells, or osmosifies their innards out. The chef tried the product, but wasn't too keen. It might improve the flavour of cheap lager.

  44. James Micallef Silver badge
    Flame

    Too many added vitamins ??

    Most modern production food has extremely poor vitamin and mineral content, it's stupid to ban food because there's too many added vitamins! If I didn't know better I would suspect it's all lobbying by Pharma groups so they can sell more drugs to people who are vitamin deficient rather than really sick.... Oh, wait!

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    (untitled)

    "What am I supposed to put on my toast now?"

    Why, Gentleman's Relish of course ! (Unless your aren't one, that is.)

  46. Panix
    Thumb Down

    How idiotic

    I wonder what they think of Brawndo then?

    Brawndo's got what plants crave. It's got electrolytes.

  47. Anonymous Coward
    Pirate

    Time to start smuggling matey!

    Quiet street corner in Copenhagen

    "Errm I'm told you can like, err I hear you can fix me up?"

    "It'll cost you fifteen euros, DON'T look at me just look over there"

    "Err sorry"

    "THIS IS THE DANISH POLICE MARMITE UNIT, WE HAVE YOU SURROUNDED"

    "oh crap"

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Coat

      "oh crap"

      No, officer, it just looks like it.

  48. John Savard Silver badge

    Felony Fortification

    I remember reading a book about life extension which noted that the FDA in the United States also restricts fortifying some foods with vitamins, even if not as strictly as the Danes. Thus, for example, adding lots of vitamin C to liquor to reduce hangovers is prohibited.

  49. Juan Inamillion

    @Keeping my head down now

    Sense of humour failure.

    That is all.

    Oh and that the Danes have a fantastic welfare state, allegedly.

  50. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Daily Fail

    Where to start:

    2004: Law introduced banning sale of foodstuf fortified with vitamins etc unless manufacturer or importer gets approval from health authorities (which most products get...)

    2011: Importer "discovers" hey we dont have the approval, and stops importing/selling product.

    2011: Expats discover no more Marmite in shop.

    Who to blame.

    Goverment!

    add "Journalists" and ignorance

    Voila

    THE DAILY FAIL

    1. Anonymous Coward
      FAIL

      alternatively

      Danish authorities in charge of food safety fail to notice world famous yeast extract has been openly sold (in contravention of the law) for 7 years.

      I hope they are more diligent in other areas - eg checking nuts for aflatoxins.

  51. John 62
    Go

    homebrew?

    bloke on TV made his own marmite with yeast and a big tub. came out as a grey goop, but apparently tasted similar.

  52. alex cee
    WTF?

    Vikings like Marmite and Vegemite

    "Neither Marmite nor Vegemite and similar products have been banned by the Danish Food And Veterinary Administration. However, fortified foods with added vitamins, minerals or other substances can not be marketed in Denmark unless approved by Danish food authorities."

    from the Danish Veterinary and Food Administration http://tinyurl.com/3rqr3jd

  53. Stevie Silver badge

    Bah!

    "deadly serious"?

    Sounds like the Danes have spotted a nasty addictive substance and acted wisely to prevent their own youth being ravaged by fatal withdrawal in the event the Marmite mines run dry.

    But, all the Marmite fans could answer this by boycotting the bacon sandwich.

  54. Tim

    Easy solution

    Just go to Christiania. The hippies will have set up a dozen cafes selling Marmite on toast by now.

  55. MaggieHall

    Tell-All Book!

    I have just mailed a copy of my book, The Mish-Mash Dictionary of Marmite: an anecdotal A-Z of 'Tar-in-Jar' to the Danish Veterinary and Food Administration. Under no illusion it will change minds - but they'll get an entertaining read, as they discover that Marmite is not 'fortified'. Well just one of the vitamins (B-12) is added. The other four Vitamin Bs are found naturally in yeast-extract, ie the waste sludge from the brewing industry. Which begs the question: why, as a great brewing nation, has Denmark not produced its own version of the Mighty-M?

    http://www.amazon.co.uk/Mish-mash-Dictionary-Marmite-Tar-jar/dp/0956368603/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1306342252&sr=1-1

  56. Will Godfrey Silver badge
    Unhappy

    I knew a Danish girl once

    They really are very strange people.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      WTF?

      Forbuds danmark

      Yes, another expat who has for years been denied his vegemite on toast for years in the godforsaken hole of a country. The annual pilgrimage downunder is a necessary expense for this reason alone. Sad really, because the quality of Danish bread and butter to go with it is not too shabby. But I digress.

      Danes are strange people, and this country is getting stranger - if that can be conceivably possible.

      The Danes are heading for a national election within the next few months, and a few weeks ago, the socialst alliance of the Social Democrats and the Socialist Peoples Party proferred their grand master plan for when they come to power (or maybe it was just part of the plan). In any case, it was a list of about 117 things that they were going to ban. I cannot recall what was on the list really, au pairs, solarium use for juveniles and all sorts of other things that right thinking left wing dingbats think should be banned.

      What struck me though, was not the content of the list, but the fact that this list exists and was highly publicised.

      I ask you, would you vote for a political party so devoid of intellect and creative thinking that it is only able to define itself in terms of items that it wants to ban? I certainly wouldn't, but the Danes probably will.

      Apparently I am the only sentient being in the country to have had this thought. Time to leave this place soon methinks.

      Dweeb

      1. Anonymous Coward
        FAIL

        Labour did this here

        Labour managed to ban loads of stuff over here, its a trait of the left. They always bang on about democracy etc unless its something they don't agree with then it gets band

  57. Martin Usher
    Pirate

    Sweden?

    I suppose you can get the stuff in Sweden, its only a short train ride from Copenhagen.

  58. Winkypop Silver badge
    Troll

    Marmite?

    Oh yeah, that's the poor man's Vegimite!

  59. Quidam

    Marmite replacement

    Axle grease or Vegemite should do the trick - they all taste the same

  60. Greg Eden

    What does Princess Mary do?

    When Princess Mary returns from visiting mum in Tasmania do the customs officials search her bags for illicit Vegemite?

    Does Mary feed Vegemite to the Crown Prince? Will the little princes and princesses grow up eating illegal toast spread?

    Perhaps Vegemite can be un-banned by Royal decree and Marmite can come along for the ride.

  61. DV Henkel-Wallace
    Megaphone

    Typical poms

    You whinge about this now, but you've had SEVEN years of gustatory relief as law was passed in 2004 while Vegemite has already got the chop. Typical for them to start with the colonials.

    Perhaps the crown princess can get Vegemite's abusive treatment reversed.

  62. MaggieHall

    Marmite Dictionary On Way To Denmark

    My book - The Mish-Mash Dictionary of Marmite - is en-route to the Danish Veterinary and Food Administration. Not expecting it to change minds - but will provide an entertaining read! And they will discover that only one of the vitamins (B-12) is added. The other four V-Bs are found naturally in yeast-extract (ie the waste sludge from the brewing industry). Which begs the question: why, as a great brewing nation, has Denmark not produced its own version of the Mighty-M? www.mish-mash-marmite.blogspot.com

  63. Mr Larrington
    FAIL

    Non-story

    I'm confused. Is this story just a lie, just spin or a combination of the two?

    Or is it just another example of the sorry excuses that pass for "news" outlets in this country publishing a load of bollocks without bothering to check the facts?

  64. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    How do Danes avoid midges then?

    OK, that needs explanation.

    There is a common belief that Marmite makes you less attractive to insects - like midges, mosquitos, biting flies. (I believe the effect is supposed to be from eating marmite rather than smearing it on ones skin.)

    As someone who seems to be particularly favoured by the attentions of said beasties, I found that the "active ingredient" of Marmite believed to have this deterrent effect is vitamin B1 (Thiamine).

    While not averse to Marmite my consumption is not regular and so, prior to my visit to Myvatn in Iceland (the name means "lake of the midges") last summer, I took 100mg B1 tablets for a few days. As a result I was made aware that my skin smelt a little different, as it does after eating garlic but not as unpleasant as the post-garlic smell. BTW - being volcanically active most of Iceland (the country, I remain silent in respect of the frozen food retailer) smells of farts. (RDA for B1 is 1.4mg but toxicity is low - water soluble so you just pee out excess).

    I was completely untroubled by midges - but neither was anyone else in the group so either the effect was protective of not just me but everyone within 100 yards or the midges were taking a few days off (probably holidaying in Scotland).

    So I may have answered my own question (assuming Danes can buy 100mg B1 tablets).

    BTW although I am an occasional marmite consumer I just tried "Marmite Cereal Bars" FAIL!

  65. Dave Cheetham

    Save our expats

    Flotilla of boats full of Marmite!

  66. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    Can't we ban their shite bacon?

    I had a bit of a wobbly in a Tesco Metro in Plymouth City centre last year as the ONLY bacon I could get was bleedy Danish! Not that Plymouth is in the middle of the country surrounded by loads of farms producing Bacon. Anyway a few months after Tesco's finest British bacon was back!

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