back to article Pippa Middleton in $5m grumble flick offer

Kate Middleton's sis Pippa has been offered a juicy $5m to get her kit off for "just one explicit scene" in a porn movie. The 27-year-old's impressive display at the recent royal nuptials attracted the attention of Vivid Entertainment's Steven Hirsch, who wrote: "As far as I was concerned, you were the star of the recent Royal …


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  1. Alex Walsh
    Paris Hilton

    Shouldn't that read..

    Sarah Ferguson, who is strapped for cash.

    (need a whip icon).

    1. sT0rNG b4R3 duRiD


      OAP Fetish eh?

    2. amanfromearth

      OH !

      Does she know Max Mosley then?

  2. Chris Miller

    Damn you!

    Aaaargh! Sarah Ferguson, porn star - there's another image I need to remove from my mind. It's a bit early for the brain rinse lotion, but needs must ...

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Playmobil glimpse into possible future...

    is demanded by all readers of El Reg!

  4. MinionZero

    Publicity stunt

    Chances of Vivid Entertainment hiring Pippa Middleton 0%

    Chances of Vivid Entertainment getting free publicity for Vivid Entertainment 100%

    1. paul 97

      makes a change from the fruit company

      As opposed to The usual:

      D list celeb loves his iThing.

      iThing cures cancer

      iTampon champions world peace.

    2. Ian Davies


      Ya think?

    3. Rob 9


      Chances of Vivid hiring a Pippa Middleton lookylikey and getting her to put on a silly posh accent... 100%.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward


        It'll be someone who pretends to look like, but actually looks nothing like Princess Beatrice, but nobody will notice so long as she's wearing the silly hat. And nothing else.

        1. Burch


          You can't miss those popeyes.

  5. LuMan
    Paris Hilton

    Ha - Nice finish

    Like the comment about Fergie! She's up for anything, that one.

    Mind you, Hirsch is either a complete dick (pun intended) or a promotional genius. What better way to get your lacklustre, overpriced grumble business a bit of publicity!

    1. LPF
      Paris Hilton


      How d you know ? " lacklustre, overpriced grumble business a bit of publicity!" Enquiring minds would like to know ;)

  6. fLaMePrOoF


    "We'd advise Hirsch to get in touch with Sarah Ferguson, who we gather is a bit strapped for cash"

    Wouldn't that be a bit.. specialised...?

  7. Anonymous Coward

    A title is required

    "We'd advise Hirsch to get in touch with Sarah Ferguson, who we gather is a bit strapped for cash"

    Pictures or it didn't on second thought's I'd rather not want to see her birthday suit!

  8. robin48gx
    Thumb Up

    if its a swedish - nudge nudge wink wink - film

    Her name is aptly chosen. Its the colloquial Swedish verb to f**k/shag.

  9. The Nameless Mist

    They should ask her brother

    Its young James they should be speaking to.

    Given the pictures circulating widely on the net of him in various states of dress and undress.

    He has recently taken to asking sites to remove them. Best of luck there laddie. Once its on the net, its there to stay.

    1. William Towle


      > Its young James they should be speaking to.

      This morning's Metro said they have.

      Online reference (albeit less confusing about whether it's in the same film*):

      * apparently not

  10. Lamont Cranston

    "with your beauty and attitude"

    Surgically enhanced and lacking in self-esteem?

    1. Anonymous John

      Surgically enhanced?

      Not a problem in grumble flicks.

  11. LesC
    Paris Hilton

    Discreet Brown Envelope Required

    In the 80's Ferguson brought us It's 'A Royal Knockout', now in the 2010's here comes Pippa Middleton with 'It's a Royal Cockout'

    Paris, obviously...

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    word "Pippa" in Greek

    FYI the word "pippa" means blowjob in greek.

    I kid ye not.

    Try the word on any unsuspecting greek male for a nice response, and female for some blushing and quite possibly a slap in your face.

    1. Philippe
      Paris Hilton

      in French too

      The word "pipe" (sounds almost the same) means blowjob in French too.

      that girl has a huge career a'head, if she gives in.


      well she wants a crown back.

    2. Lee Dowling Silver badge


      Roughly the same in Italian too, but involving the hands, so I'm told.

  13. Tim Jenkins

    Nice to see Reg readers are such cunning linguists

    That is all.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge


      I see what you did there.

    2. Arnold Lieberman

      Kinda Lingers?

      I like trucking...

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Mistress Bee...

    ...must either be shopping for a slinky white dress, or is on holiday...

  15. Naughtyhorse


    so that will be in wide screen then

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    She was my star too

    Just that.

    noting smutty or suggestive ... Just that I thought she looked gorgeous :)

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    It would be a nice throwback to....

    The kind of behavior we got from the Royals back in the 80s and early 90s.

    Maybe its something about having the Tories in power that just sets the Royal Family off??

    Paris, because she can show Pippa a thing or two about being a porn star, or at least she can do a girl-on-girl guest star in the upcoming cinematic masterpiece!!

  18. Intractable Potsherd


    .... are we talking about the bridesmaid that makes Sticky the Stick-Insect look obese? If so - FFS!

  19. chr0m4t1c

    I hear

    Miss Middleton is now the most talked about royal arse since Prince Andrew.

  20. Ooo-wait-BUT!

    wrong angle entirely

    what we have here is simply the porn industry making tentative enquiries as to the potential demand for their 'product' without additional collagen, silicon and botox.

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