The Mounties have confessed themselves baffled after a Canadian chicken shed blew up in a huge, devastating explosion whose shockwaves were "felt across southern Manitoba", according to reports. The Red River Valley Echo has the story, reporting that a "large chicken barn which used to be part of the landscape" exploded in a " …
It was to easier.
You know I'm thinking of this song by dead prez.
Once upon a time
There was a very serious situation growing
There was a farmer and a farmyard filled with animals
And this is the story of their times
Old man sammy had a farm
Walked the land with the wife
Most of the time shit was calm
His whole life was maintained off the everyday labor
From the mules in the field to the cattle in the stable
This is how we kept food on this table (maxing)
You would have he was disabled by the way he be relaxing
Acting like mr. magnificent
But the animals were thinking something different
The sentiment was tension in the barnyard
Throughout the years they had been through mad drama
With the farmer, word is bond
And they all came to one conclusion
They argued there was no way they'd ever be free
If it was up to humans
Therefore the only course left was revolution which was understandable
And since the pigs promised to lead in the interest of all the animals
They planned a full attack
Under the leadership of hannibal
The fattest pig in the pack
The next morning on the farm
Everything was calm
Just before dawn
But before long
The sun got so hot it made the farm seem electric
Now check it
This is when that shit got hectic
Directed by hannibal, the animals attacked
Old sam was in a state of shock
And fell up on his back
And dropped his rifle
Reaching in vain
Each and every creature from the field at his throat
Screaming "kill, feel the pain."
This is the animal in man
This is the animal in you
This is the animal in man
Coming true (2x)
After they ran the farmer off the farm
The pigs went around and called a meeting in the barn
Hannibal spoke for several hours
But when talks about his plans for power
That's when the conversation turned sour
He issued an offical ordinance to set
If not a pig from this day forth then you insubordinate
That's when the horses went buckwild
One of them shouted out
"you fraudulent pigs, we know your fucking style!"
Hannibal's face was flushed and pale
All the animals eyes full of disgust and betrayal
He felt the same way sam felt
They took his tongue out of his mouth
And cut his body up for sale, for real
You better listen while you can
Its a very thin line between animal and man
When hannibal crossed the line they all took a stand
What would have done?
Shook his hand?
This is the animal in man
Total non-story, no chicken casualties are reported nor are any ever likely to occur, the fear-mongering mainstream press are greatly exaggerating the threat to poultry from exploding Canadian sheds, since for the amount of shed released into the Canadian prairies a chicken would have to stand on the same spot for over a year in order to raise its chance of being hit by flying splinters by 0.0002%. The truth is the Mounties are simply bowing to public pressure to declare the sky is falling in.
Organic "dust" (like flour, but also straw dust etc) is quite flammable when in suspension in the air. Where I grew up, explosions due to dust were one of the most feared dangers during harvests as they are capable of destroying large and expensive equipment. Basically some dust in suspension causes a rather small explosion, which brings more dust in the air, leading to a big kaboom, even in comparatively small and air-deprived silos.
Scaled up to match the volume of that shed, I can imagine a HUGE explosion indeed.
There would have had to be some organic dust in there to begin with, but it's not hard to imagine that there could have been some (residues? Empty shed used as storage?), and you don't need much. the limiting factor in smaller silos is the quantity of air, not dust.
I first thought of a powdered chicken-shit explosion, like those that happen in flour mills occasionally, but the article said it was clean. The size of the explosion as described, suggests the whole building was full of a near-stoichiometric mixture of propane & air. Perhaps the tanks were empty because they had all just leaked out into the building.
PS Sarah, we need a nuclear mushroom icon for even bigger kabooms.
Indeed... For the tank to be damaged it would either have to had the explosion occur inside it, or it would have had to be subjected to prolonged heat. Neither happened here, but a leak of gas into the building sounds good to me.
What ignited it is a good question, but congratulations on getting the mixture spot on! Approx 15:1 of C3H8 in a shed that size... Gonna be impressive!
Why not, we get the blame for everything else. <sigh>
I can see the headline now;
"Bigfoot Butt Blows Barn"
Right now poor old Sasquatch is rolling in the snow to soothe his singed skin and swearing off cigs for the next
Any old chicken barn will fill with methane so all it needs is a statically charged leaf or piece of discarded plastic to blow against a suitable earth-point and zap-BigBadaBOOOOOOOOM!!
Oh well, I imagine it's well ventilated now. <LOL>
The chickens obviously found out about the farm owners dastardly plans involving a chicken pie machine. With the help of a crafty rooster with aspirations of flight, they destroyed the machine and ran off for the hills. Hence why no chickens were found.
Truely, it was an inspiring and daring escape plan. If hollywood was smart they would buy rights to this even and create a movie adaptation of this exciting chicken run.
As the tale goes, a farmer was clearing some land for a new field, and was dynamiting tree stumps.
When he went to the shed to get some more dynamite, he found that his sow had gotten out of her pen and was eating the dynamite!
He yelled at the sow and she took off running, with him in hot pursuit. As they both rounded the hen house, the hired hand came out from egg gathering. The farmer yelled, "Stop that sow!" at the hired hand, who, since his hands were full, hauled off and kicked the sow.
The resulting blast vaporised the hen house, killed the hired hand, caved in the barn, blew every window out of the farmhouse, and put the farmer in the hospital for months.
And, for two weeks after the explosion, the farmer's wife had to tend to one VERY sick sow!
Maybe the sow had a relapse?
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I can't believe Lewis missed this. Number of deaths in explosion--0. Number of deaths caused by radiation at Daiichi--0. Syllogism--a chicken shack can be as deadly as three fried nuclear reactors. As Mark Twain once observed: "That's the wonderful thing about science; one gets a wholesale return in conjecture on a meager investment in facts."
For those few Register readers who might care, this story is 5 days old. The explosion occurred on Friday, in the late morning. Neither the story nor the link reveal the date. Good to see Lewis is maintaining his usual standards of journalistic excellence.
The shack itself was less than 5,000 square feet, which is house-size in the area where I live. The market value was less than $20,000. All that's left is part of the foundation. The interior was clean. Canadian sources say propane and electricity were still supplied to the disused structure. Our unflappable Canadian brethren, both Mounties and firemen, assert that "the explosion is not suspicious." Which sentiment I find astonishing, but one that is very closely translated by our Arabic Muslim brethren's expression: "inshallah."
Mr. Page has been uncharacteristically silent on Fukushima these last days ...
can we pretty please have another article on how we have nothing to fear but fear itself?
Or on how (and why) the panicmongers at IAEO have upgraded Fukushima to a level 7 incident?
So many questions, so few chicken sheds to explode instead.
A friend of mine planted half a stick of dynamite down a deep-drop outhouse. In his words: "then the owner came out. we thought - oh no he is going to die. I am going to go to jail for the rest of my life. then there was a big boom. A gout of blue flame erupted out of the ground and lit up the whole sky. followed by a rain of sewerage that covered us all. the outhouse totally disappeared. there weren't any questions asked anyway because he was holding out on connecting to the town sewer system"
That was before 9/11. No suspicious circumstances? I bet those boys keep their heads down for a couple of days...
Holy slippery silkie shit... 5,000 sq. ft. and it's a shed! Why that's over 22 NanoWales which, if square, would be a bit long of 2.3 Double-decker buses on a side! Hell, it would fit my last house in it four times and still have enough room to park the car, even if I drove... a double-decker bus! Remind me to never take directions from Lewis. He'd tell me to watch for the crack in the asphalt and it'd turn out to be a 200 foot deep vertical wall yawning chasm that can't be crossed for 1000 miles without air transport.
Shed my arse! A pint for the rest of you lot feeling a mite jealous.
And unless this is a repeat of Tunguska, it's something that was in the chicken shed.
With an explosion that powerful, if I were in charge of the local police, I would be checking the area for chemical traces. Presumably, someone had been storing a lot of powerful explosives in that building.
Or perhaps there was just a propane leak, but the explosion didn't affect the tanks the propane came from.
Following the recent reports on The Register of two separate instances of men being killed by their cocks I suspect an angry bird terror cell in training.
They are probably planning an attack on a crowded public area as we speak, this was the test firing - just like the scene in in the empty barn in Black Sunday (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0075765/)
I for one welcome our Feathered Overlords.