Doner kebab saves bloke's life. Duh.
Well that's to be expected. They do say kebabs clog arteries.
A 37-year-old Somerset man can thank fast food for saving his life, after he plugged a serious throat wound with a doner kebab. James Hobbs was attacked in Highbridge on 15 January after he popped out to Tasty Bitez for some meaty goodness. He suffered a deep cut across the throat, but "held the wrapped £3.40 takeaway to his …
Why are the best ones are in the dodgiest areas?
The van on our estate, perfectly safe to visit but horrible food. Although they look to be doing quite well (brand new van and a couple of new 4x4s parked next to it).
There is a much better shop a bit further away, but the area is just plain scary. Avoid any eye contact with the other customers, and certainly don't look at their dogs.
If he really did lose that much, I'm amazed he survived at all.
If he lost six and a half pints out of a total of around 8 before the ambulance turned up, then I'd say the kebab (and later, the towel) wasn't doing a very good job of keeping the blood in his body.
Or maybe there was a touch of exaggeration in the report?
It does seem like rather a lot, doesn't it?
I seem to remember from my TA days that the first field dressings that we were issued were designed to hold about a pint of blood. When blood spots started to appear on the outside of the dressing, you whacked another one on top of the previous - up to a maximum of three.
The logic being; someone who has lost more than three pints of blood is very likely to die and therefore you should direct your efforts toward casualties with greater survival odds.
Simple, if a slightly brutal, logic.
Went on a first aid training course recently and one of the other attendees had worked as a doorman on various clubs ... one of the tips he'd picked up there was in the case of a stab wound was to ask if any women there had a tampon in their handbag as those were excellent at sealing a stab wound!
Talk about fast thinking with fast food.
I wonder how many people are going to give him curry about his improvised bandage?
It was a good thing that he wasn't eating a mung-bean tofu burger now wasn't it?
When asked whether he'd learned his first aid at Red Cross or through St. Johns, he politely replied (because he was well-'bread') "Naan of the above".
One final question - does this mean that pitta bread (or similar) is now covered by NHS (or Medicare or MedicAid)?
Rather sad that Somerset, where knife crime was never a big factor, has descended to people slashing others outside kebab shops over a bint. I blame the grockles. I suppose it's also equally sad that the average post (my previous included) are jokey rather than outraged. What a sad lot us IT b4sta4rds are!
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