Time to short those stocks, boys.
Erm, does anyone know how I do that?
GJC
Steve Jobs takes 'medical leave of absence' from Apple
Apple CEO Steve Jobs told staff at the company today that he was taking a "medical leave of absence". He did not reveal specifics about why he had been given time off from the Mac and iPhone maker. "At my request, the board of directors has granted me a medical leave of absence so I can focus on my health. I will continue as …
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Monday 17th January 2011 15:02 GMT Anonymous Coward
Erm
If I remember rightly, you have to borrow some money you couldn't ever afford to pay, back from some idiot^h^h^h^h bank willing to lend it. Buy a huge amount of stock with it, watch the stock price rise then sell it again at the higher price to another idiot^h^h^h^hinvestor, pay back the bank and pocket the profit without ever having had the cash in the first place, or indeed having bought anything or sold anything tangible.
Or something like that.
Nothing dodgy about it at all as far as I can see*.
*Yes there is.
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Tuesday 18th January 2011 10:01 GMT Oninoshiko
nudie-shorts
oh, its better then that! you forgot what happens when they CAN'T buy them at the lower price (or at all)... wait for it.... NOTHING! ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! YOU"RE SO STUPID!!! (sorry, movie flash back there). But yes, the person who bought then in good faith is just out the money and has nothing. It's called a "Fail to deliver" and the buyer is left holding.... nothing.
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Monday 17th January 2011 15:27 GMT jonathanb
Re: Erm
You find someone who has Apple shares, such as a tracker fund; borrow some shares off them; sell the borrowed shares to some other person; buy the shares back hopefully at a lower price and give them back to the person you borrowed them from.
The risk is that it ends up like another Volkswagen where someone ends up owning >100% of the company, and the general lack of available shares and short sellers being forced to buy them urgently causes the price to shoot up into orbit.
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Thursday 20th January 2011 15:19 GMT Yag
It's the opposite...
Short selling shares means selling shares you don't have...
So...
you have to borrow some shares you don't have, back from some idiot^h^h^h^h bank willing to lend them. Sell this huge amount of shares, watch the stock price fall then buy it again at the lower price from another sheep^h^h^hidiot^h^h^h^hinvestor, give back the shares and pocket the profit without ever having had the shares in the first place, or indeed having bought anything or sold anything tangible.
Or something like that.
Nothing dodgy about it at all as far as I can see*.
*Yes there is.
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Monday 17th January 2011 18:20 GMT kode
Why should I care for him
Considering Steve Jobs' main goal in life has been being a narcissistic money-grabber who really seems to have enjoyed being bitchy towards others I fail to understand why should I be crying for him? It seems Apple fanbois can't understand the concept that Jobs is not universally seen as a deity who's come to save us and deliver us redemption in the form of... an iPod?
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Tuesday 18th January 2011 22:31 GMT Graham Wilson
@kode -- Job's Apple connection should have nothing to do with it.
@kode -- Job's Apple connection should have nothing to do with it.
As I said to A. Coward's post, it's just having a little human empathy for a fellow human who's suffering. Even soldiers in the much more dire circumstances of a battlefield often show considerable compassion for wounded enemy. It's just common human decency.
Remember, there but for the grace of fortune go I.
I'd think twice before associating with you 'thumbs-up' blokes.
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Tuesday 18th January 2011 22:24 GMT Graham Wilson
@Anonymous Coward (Glad to see.) Correct, it's just basic human empathy.
Jobs isn't one of my favorite people by a long shot but I wouldn't wish what he has on anyone, even enemies.
In the circumstances, it's just basic human empathy for someone who's ill (and pancreatic cancer is about as bad as the C-word gets).
There's precious little empathy in the world as it is.
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Monday 17th January 2011 15:55 GMT Anonymous Coward
Who cares that they don't pay a dividend?
As a shareholder with a solid five figures invested in Apple I can say categorically there is no piss taking going on, the returns in share price in the last few years have been stunning. When you buy the shares you know that no dividend will be forthcoming. As far as I am concerned, may the status quo continue, I'm loving the capital gain (the tax on which is easier to plan for in any case).
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Tuesday 18th January 2011 16:26 GMT Hans 1
dividends kill
Dividends should be made illegal, as a lot of companies prefer to pay dividends than reward employees or increase the workforce.
I remember working for a company where all our privileges were cut and bonuses not paid out, we even ended up not getting our xmas prez despite hard work and even growing during and after the 2000 bubble burst. The company paid large dividends to the shareholders, we got nothing. That is why I left ... and it is the last time I will work for a publicly traded business.
Paying out dividends is evil!
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Thursday 20th January 2011 15:19 GMT Anonymous Coward
heh...
I should tell you about my lovely company...
In 2008, thanks to the crisis, no pay raise was issued.
Some project leaders even lost their bonuses.
On the other hand, the dividend this year was around 1ME.
more than 1.2KE per worker.
Paid to the 3 shareholders.
The CEO and his associates.
NOT publicly traded business are not really better you know.
Anonymous coward... cause that's what I am (or else I'ld quit this place at once!)
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Monday 17th January 2011 16:10 GMT Kristian Walsh
It is news...
It would be front page technology news. There aren't many CEOs in tech who are more visible and influential as Steve Jobs. And it was the lead story only on the BBC's technology section, if its prominence offends you.
It would also be front-page business news. A highly successful company's CEO announces medical leave out of the blue, when there's no obvious succession. That's news if you hold the stock.
General news? Maybe not, but Jobs is something of a celebrity himself, the last of the whizz-kids now that Bill G has retired. (... and I know Woz was the wizard, but Steve could SELL).
Apple really is the closest thing the tech industry has to a fashion house - a major commercial empire led and directed by one person's ideas. And I don't mean "fashion house" in any derogatory sense. Without him, the company would not have that obsessive pursuit of a single big idea that makes it successful.
Whatever news it is, I wish him a quick recovery.
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Monday 17th January 2011 15:13 GMT Doug Glass
SJ
Regardless of your choices for computers, smart phones and etc., Steve Jobs HAS been a major, major force in the industry. Although I'm personally not an Apple fan (1st home computer was an Apple btw), I recognize his brilliance and business acumen. We need people like Steve Jobs for a whole host of reasons; I hope his influence continues far into the future.
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Monday 17th January 2011 16:49 GMT Ed Vim
I agree
...and coincidentally my first computer was also a Mac. There's no denying Steve Jobs has made significant contributions to the consumer computer market and I respect him immensely for that. But this is just an offhand observation -- it seems like the past couple of times he has taken time off for medical issues (2004 and 2009) each time he comes back, it's with more of an anti-consumer attitude. I don't recall Apple being such a walled-garden environment, embracing DRM and restricting its users, until the past few years.
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Monday 17th January 2011 15:43 GMT podster
For the guy mainly responsible for
The Apple Mac, at a time when you were fighting DOS commands on a heavyweight IBM keyboard.
Keeping Pixar going.
The iPod and its way that even my technophobic girlfriend at the managed to use it.
The iPhone and introducing the general population to usable (however available) smartphones.
The App Store and all its benefits for users and developers alike.
The iPad for letting us know that sometimes technology can be 'magical'
Love him or Hate him, you cant deny he has delivered massive advances in the way average people use technology.
get well Steve
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Monday 17th January 2011 16:28 GMT Alex Rose
"Magical"?
I can agree to an extent with all your points except the "magical" iPad comment.
I've actually used one, I just don't see what's so great about it. Too big to be a phone, not powerful enough to be a laptop.
iPhone -yes, Mac - yes, iPad -eh?
(Note - I own no Apple devices, although I've no problem buying them for my wife.)
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Monday 17th January 2011 16:27 GMT Anonymous Coward
Too soon
I always thought he came back too soon after the first liver op...and at CEO level too, so the schedule will be demanding.
The docs probably told him to take it easy for a good while, but he probably ignored them and went back to work anyway. And I imagine his best-money-can-afford variety wouldn't be partial to getting things wrong (unlike our megrahi-releasing NHS types).
And now he's suffering for it.
Obvously - we won't know for sure, but that's my bet.
Note to Steve: when the docs tell you to rest....rest!
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Monday 17th January 2011 17:13 GMT Geoff Campbell
Absolutely agree.
However, that's kinda not the point. Steve Jobs is two entities - he is a private individual, one of 6.8 billion on the planet, in which capacity it's sad that he's ill, but I'm not going to pretend he deserves any more of my time or emotions than any one of the other 6.8 billion people who I have never met, and never will meet, when they get sick and, eventually, die.
In his other persona, he is the boss of a company in the industry I've worked in for thirty years. And as such, my immediate response is *always* going to be "How does this impact my industry, my working practices, my finances."
Sorry if anyone finds that offensive, it's just the way of the world. If you want to fly out to Cupertino and lay a bunch of flowers on his grave, be my guest, although personally I'd rather you didn't unless you actually know him personally and are grieving for him, rather than the horribly mawkish way we have developed since St. Diana died of projecting our un-expressed grief from people we do know onto celebrities who we don't know.
GJC
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Monday 17th January 2011 16:36 GMT Andus McCoatover
There aren't many folks like Jobs.
OK, I've described the iPhone as a 'Jobsworth' in the past forums, but...
Jobs, Gates, Sinclair and Sugar (no joke), Moore, Hewlett, Packard, Whittle, Baird, Marconi, Kernighan, Richie, Ollila etc., are individuals who have changed our lives irrevocably.
If not for them, most of us'd be growing veg/milking cows on a farm. (Why, neither Facebook, spam or cheap Viagra would exist. Erm...nobody's perfect...)
They're just a handful of high-achievers - visionaries, if you will, we should be a bit kinder here...
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Tuesday 18th January 2011 15:16 GMT Andus McCoatover
Didn't forget.
That's why I put "etc" after the list. Other folks crowding me to use the pub computer, so I thought I'd better keep it short. After all, many of the throng glaring at me had big tattoos, big biceps and big bikes.
But, yeah, there were hundreds more. James Hargreaves springs to mind for contributing to the Industrial Revolution.
("Ohh, Luxury, lad. In't mornin', I'd get up before I went to bed, just to lick t' jenny* clean". "That's Owt! You 'ad it easy. Me dad sent me down t' pit when I was only 5, I finally got out after 30 years, and found that bloody Thatcher woman at' top!" - etc..)
* http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spinning_jenny
(interesting read).
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Monday 17th January 2011 17:13 GMT Anonymous Coward
Get well soon
There's a world of difference between "liking" something and "respecting" it.
I don't like many of apple's products, but I think they do what they do very well. Just because they don't suit me doesn't mean I can't admire them for what they do, especially for the technically challenged.
Same goes for Steve, he comes across as an arrogant cock, but you have to respect him if you have the slightest interest in tech.
So unless you think being an arrogant cock should be a capital offence then the only decent* thing is to wish him well.
(*which is why the sort that bang on about their shares will continue to do so)
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Monday 17th January 2011 17:13 GMT David Neil
On balance
Yes, he is ill, and that's a shame, however he is the CEO of a company which provides employment for thousands.
If his health is such an issue that he cannot continue to lead the company on an ongoing basis then it is understandable that people who own the company, and are employed by it, are concerned about what plans are in place if his health continues to deteriorate.
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Monday 17th January 2011 17:13 GMT Andrew Jones 2
as I have written elsewhere....
I admit I am not a fan of Apple (in particular the way Apple do things) but there is no denying that Android simply could not have happened (or rather it wouldn't be where it is today) if the iPhone had not been marketed as a smartphone for the general user (as opposed to just the rich business types).
As for Steve - regardless of what is wrong with him - I really can't understand why people are not being more compassionate?
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Monday 17th January 2011 17:14 GMT JaitcH
Let's hope Body Spare Parts Inc warranty is handled better than Apples
If Jobs is headed back for warranty work on the spare parts he was given, it is (remotely) possible he will gain understanding of how his customers view warranties and get tired of having to sign non-disclosure forms and fight for their rights.
The union shareholders demand for succession plans is quiet prescient and deserves an answer as Apple is, supposedly, a public company.
Jobs, in asking people to respect his privacy, is asking too much, given how much data he collects on others.
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Monday 17th January 2011 19:40 GMT Anonymous Coward
I'm not being funny when I say ...
It probably *isn't* anything to do with his liver -- I think its mental. He's probably stressed out to the max and that is having a major downer on his physical and mental state.
Meanwhile, though, I wish Apple would just fix iChoonz 10.1.1 and the airport update which has completely borked my other half's Mac. That's just as important to me, 'cos I'm tired of fucking about with it.
Aren't they the "Macs, they just work" brigade, after all?
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Monday 17th January 2011 19:41 GMT Lewis Mettler 1
a wish of good health
Aside from the fact that I personally do not agree with Apple policies (and no I do not own any Apple products), I very much appreciate what Apple has done.
Apple has shown the world that if you develop good products you can be successful without paying money to Microsoft. And that is very important.
As a consumer you always want choices. Those idiots working for Microsoft that claim otherwise are just Microsoft employees afraid to identify themselves for fear of being disbelieved. Besides they know fraud works better for Microsoft than anything. Force everyone to buy Internet Explorer and just lie to them about why. Consumers are idiots anyway. They believe anything. Fraud does work. There is no doubt about that. Even incompetient managers know that.
But, as for Steve Jobs personally, I wish him good health. Besides the industry needs more people who will take the initiative to satisfy consumer's needs as opposed to ignore them and try to force the consumer. Apple does that too by the way. So the name Jesus phone does not really fit the company. But, Apple has been necessary for the industry.
Who are those idiots that buy inferior products simply because Microosoft is trying to sell them? Or, not trying to sell them because they know the consumer is forced to buy them? Do you remember any advertisement for Internet Explorer? You do not see them for other browsers either but they are all either free or bundled with the OS. (Even Apple bundles Safari.) Yet, no one in the industry will dispute that the browser is a key product.
Why is the choice of a key product outside the choice of any and all consumers? First you must buy the illegally bundled one. And only then can you get a second car free.
You have to be idiot to not know that illegal activity is prevelent and controlling YOU.
But, Apple has shown that you can develop any number of products in the industry and be successful. And that after all is what is important about Apple.
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Tuesday 18th January 2011 10:01 GMT url
how long did he deny paternity for again?
I forget.
"I had a vasectomy y'honour, can't possibly be mine....let the mother & child remain in poverty"
yeah, nice guy!
I wouldn't wish cancer on anyone, but, I don't think his influence on the tech sector has been quite as revolutionary as is being made out.
Snake oil salesman, yeah
genius, no
overall positive, not even close.
Special snowflake syndrome with a distinctly distasteful 80's Gordon Gheko hangover, seems more like it.
Can he cheat his way up another transplant list this time I wonder?
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Tuesday 18th January 2011 10:52 GMT Equitas
Feet of clay ............
Bill Gates may be a scoundrel peddling operating systems and software of dubious value (as well as a small amount of hardware which is actually rather good), attempting to lock governments and the world's public into exclusive use of his products and keeping users on an upgrading treadmill for his own financial benefit. In other words, a very successful businessman. And he'll no doubt die unlamented by the world at large. But at least he's never presented himself as a quasi-divine figure.
And there's the difference. Steve Jobs has presented himself as, and has been regard by the fanbois as, a quasi-divine figure with a vision to which he has sought -- and gained -- what appears to be an absolute loyalty from his followers. What's the world expected to do when Jobs' feet of clay are exposed? The fanbois will still look at the head of gold and ignore the realities of the situation.
Of course Jobs has been a major influence on the computing world, as a representative -- and for decades the leading representative -- of the "my way or no way" approach. And, frankly, if Jobs' way had prevailed, I for one wouldn't be using computers to the extent I do in everyday life. And I say that as someone who was machine-code programming in the 1960s and can remember making very extensive use of the very first IBM word processors in the 1960s.
It's the openness of the IBM PC which has made customised hardware and software, relevant to the actual work we need to do, economically feasible for countless millions of people around the world. I don't like Microsoft and I don't like Bill Gates, but if I were tied to the Jobs approach to hardware and software I wouldn't have either the hardware or the software I need because (a) the hardware I need would be out of my price range (which is at the top end of the custom-built PC range) and (b) the software would never have been written or, again, would be totally out of my price range.
Jobs has been the enemy of the very things that have made it possible for me to make very extensive use of computers in my work setting.
If he expects privacy, he should stop presenting himself as a messiah-figure -- then we can show him sympathy as a mere man overtaken by illness. He can't have it both ways.
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Tuesday 18th January 2011 12:20 GMT Anonymous Coward
Speak for yourself
I wish no ill to Steve Jobs, but:
You are seriously deluded if you think that noone will lament the death of Bill Gates. Bill has done an unbelievable amount of very important charity work, with the Bill and Melinda Gates foundation. In just one area - Malaria - he has already done more than all governments in the world put together. The foundation is also pioneering research into HIV/AIDS and many other global problems.
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Tuesday 18th January 2011 14:49 GMT Anonymous Coward
Well, I'm pleased that....
... Bill has decided to spend a lot of money on helping to fight malaria, but please remember how he came by so much of the stuff in the first place. The same sort of business practices as all monopolists crave.
I just hope he isn't doing it in the hope of saving his soul but rather because he wants to make amends.
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This topic is closed for new posts.
Biting the hand that feeds IT
