back to article Pole positions: Base station spotters scrap for prize

Our competition last year to identify genuine mobile phone base stations went down well, with more than 30,000 of you having a shot at divining the antennas from the trees. In the end it was Robert Jeffrey who scooped the coveted El Reg goodie bag, but for those who didn't manage it, here, much belatedly, are the answers... …


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  1. bugalugs
    Paris Hilton

    And now for something completely different

    Paris ? something about masts, base stations, trees, roots etc...

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Number 5: The Larch.

    The Larch.

    1. Disco-Legend-Zeke

      The Larch... number 3.

      1. TheRealRoland

        Thou shalt not...

        Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out.

  3. Tom 15


    Surely the give away with the masts disguised as trees is not the cabinet or the fence but the fact that they look absolutely nothing like trees?

  4. nichomach

    I can't help it...

    ...I keep thinking of ...


  5. Neil Barnes Silver badge

    Are you sure about #4?

    I'm not convinced.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Number 5???

    At least make some effort and spend 30secs on Google.



    'NO. 1'


    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      I think you'll find the joke has been adapted to suit

      seeing as even a blind bat (nudge-nudge, say no more, say no more) could tell that No 1 is not a larch or indeed any kind of naturally ocurring arboreal formation.

      1. Anonymous Coward

        Subjects, only failers don't read them.

        It's good that he was referring to Pic 5 then... re-read and pay extra attention to THE SUBJECT.

  7. PC Paul

    They make the trees just down the road from me...

    At least some of the trees come from a company just down the road from me:

    They do look quite good 'in the flesh'.

  8. Alan Brown Silver badge

    Pic 4

    Are you sure the mast isn't the one in the middle?

    Churches tend to make a good bit of money towards the renovation fund by allowing radio gear to be housed in/on steeples...

  9. John 62
    Big Brother

    not just Scotland

    there's a fake metal tree a few miles outside Belfast

    1. blackworx

      Fake metal tree

      What would a real metal tree look like then?

      1. MrT

        Just wait a few weeks....

        ....and there'll be loads in houses across the land - fake glass baubles aplenty too - can't all do a 'Griswald' and dig our own real non-fake wooden tree up ;-)

      2. Eddie Edwards


        Like this:

  10. Steve Evans


    There is a particularly unconvincing tree by the M25, round the bottom bit near the services.

    There's also something very odd between J29 and J30. It looks like a Roman column with branches tied to it. I'm not joking, it's not a badly modelled tree (unless the artist has never seen a tree) it really is a Romanesque column standing in a field. I'll try to get a photo of it (without being arrested for stopping on the hard shoulder).

    1. Steve Roper
      Big Brother


      being arrested for the heinous crime of taking photographs in a public place.

      1. Steve Evans

        Re: Or

        Actually, it gets worse... I actually know the "Too tall photographer", I'd better delete his number from my phone first! If they find that they're going to throw away the key!

  11. Spanners Silver badge

    Do you mean this?,-4.064941&sspn=18.514185,39.506836&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Manchester+M25,+United+Kingdom&ll=51.530159,0.278177&spn=0.037964,0.077162&t=h&z=14&layer=c&cbll=51.530272,0.278262&panoid=ZCFq40WFlzUEFjpIyWVP8g&cbp=12,290.18,,3,-1.97

  12. E 2


    "That's a mast..."

    No, that's a rendering.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    one of the earliest i know of:

    This one was installed in my hometown (now famous for being next to Ikea, and having one of the earliest base station in a fake tree) near Paris in 2004. I learnt about it when someone sent me a .ppt that included pictures of it!,1.983179&sspn=0.043797,0.077162&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Avenue+Montaigne,+78340+Les+Clayes-sous-Bois,+Yvelines,+Ile-de-France&t=h&layer=c&cbll=48.820319,1.999151&panoid=cW6OpL2627rvOSfzZivTlg&cbp=12,63.39,,0,-25.46&ll=48.820319,1.999151&spn=0.000684,0.001206&z=20

  14. Victor Ludorum

    That's all very well, but

    There's one in Devon as well:,+brixham&sll=50.381378,-3.558497&sspn=0.019567,0.055747&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Hillhead,+Brixham,+United+Kingdom&ll=50.381734,-3.558712&spn=0.019457,0.055747&t=h&z=15&layer=c&cbll=50.381374,-3.558517&panoid=M-z4NhoKEwj_kOkYCFBKMA&cbp=12,287.32,,1,0.84

    My wife saw it and said 'That's a funny looking tree!' I had to agree with her...


    (It's not beer, it's cider, cos that's what I drink when I'm in Devon)

  15. Paul Berry

    Seems they have them just about anywhere rural

    Here's a fake tree just outside Sheffield:

    I wish it'd light up at Christmas.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    "more than 30,000 of you"

    Didn't know there were even that many Reg readers.

    Well, that's good, then. The more the better!

    I still think of this site the way it was many many years ago, not too long after it first started, when it seemed like kind of a niche thing.

    I wish even *more* people would read the Reg and get a clue about security stuff.

    The more tame mom-n-pops get scared away by the, er, 'colorful' aspects of the site though, and I can't send Reg links to my conservative relatives who are in desperate need of the kind of security info that this site has. Ah well, nothing's perfect, eh.

    1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: "more than 30,000 of you"

      Oh yeah, bunches of 'em.

  17. Will Godfrey Silver badge

    Nostalgia ain't what it used to be.

    Any of the earliest stuff still viewable anywhere?

  18. Anonymous Coward

    Wayback, unless your ISP blocks it

    "Any of the earliest stuff still viewable anywhere?"

    Yup, at the Wayback Machine: <*/> **UNLESS** your ISP blocks it as mentioned here: <>

    If you can get to that page, the first Reg page they list there is dated June 28 1998 - and it has a different vulture-logo, interestingly. (I like the new/current logo better.)

    Anyway, the FAQ say you need Javascript turned on to get images etc from the archive and not from the live website, according to <> although I only noticed minor differences between Javascript vs no-Javascript, but I only checked a couple of articles there.

    Sample 1998 headline shows early indications of amusing Reg snarkiness :) that we all know and love:

    "Microsoft rolls out Windows 98 - quietly. Low-key world domination bid succeeds with barely a shot fired" - from <>

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