back to article Steve Jobs carried 'ninja throwing stars' in hand luggage

Steve Jobs has vowed never to visit Japan again after being prevented from leaving the country with a set of ninja throwing stars, according to a local magazine. The Apple CEO apparently had a set of shuriken in his carry-on luggage when he was returning from a family vacation by private jet in July, according to SPA magazine …

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  1. Thomas 18
    Jobs Horns

    How does it feel to be subjected to retarded control measures

    Karma perhaps?

    1. Arkasha
      Jobs Horns

      Control measures

      Expect to see Jobs retaliate in the next few days with the addition of a "no Japanese character sets" clause added to the iOS developer's rules.

    2. hitmouse

      大したことない

      大したことない

      1. nichomach
        Jobs Horns

        *snigger*

        彼は誤ってそれらを持っていた?

        1. lpopman
          Coat

          titular titter

          名前を変更する

  2. Annihilator Silver badge
    Black Helicopters

    Well

    It puts Ballmer's chair-throwing into perspective. I'd rather have a chair hurled at me than a shuriken!

    1. Marky W
      Grenade

      Unless...

      ...it's a chair made of KNIVES!!!!!!!!!

      http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/3538652/Artists-makes-3000-chair-out-of-cutlery.html

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Karma indeed

    Why didn't the twit just put them in his luggage???

    1. JaitcH
      Jobs Horns

      You answered your own question

      Because he is a narcissistic TWIT!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Megaphone

      Luggage?

      Business w£$%ers don't do luggage!!

      They push the boundaries of hand baggage with their carefully measured wheely cases which they then cram into an entire overhead locker, (take their time over it as well, Mr Burns arms are not good for this) then when they get off the plane they trip you wheeling their very light bag (so light even your little sister could carry it, just not them) up the boarding corridor.

      This saves them 5 minutes of crucial circle-jerk-meeting time not waiting at baggage reclaim.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Paris Hilton

        Hand Luggage

        Your average usiness w*nker needs the trolley to wheel their huge egos around, Jobs needs the private jet for his.

        Paris, sure I can.

    3. Kubla Cant Silver badge

      Could it be...

      because he was on a private plane, where the distinction between carry-on and hold luggage is presumably less important.

  4. mtdnelson

    Can we have a 'ninja Jobs' icon? Please?

    That is all.

    1. Trevor 3
      Coat

      Ninja Jobs?

      Is that the turd you don't see until its too late?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Plebe rules for the masses apply to Jesus CEO's?

    Anyone care to wager on the phrase "do you know who I am?" being used?

    /Paris because only someone as clueless as her would put throwing stars in their carry-on

    1. Vehlin
      Joke

      Do You Know Who *I* Am?

      This is not a game of "Who the fuck are you?", for I am Vader... Darth Vader.

      1. snafu

        I can kill you with a tray

        This one is wet, this one is wet, this one is wet…

        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rqnDRLZlMN4

  6. Lamont Cranston

    Given that you can't take nail scissors through an airport,

    how did he think he'd get away with this? Aren't shuriken illegal pretty much everywhere?

  7. Cunningly Linguistic
    Jobs Horns

    Throwing something?

    So he threw an iPaddy and spat his dummy out?

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    CAL. PEN. CODE § 12020

    (a) Any person in this state who does any of the following is punishable by imprisonment in a county jail not exceeding one year or in the state prison:

    (1) Manufactures or causes to be manufactured, imports into the state, keeps for sale, or offers or exposes for sale, or who gives, lends, or possesses any cane gun or wallet gun, any undetectable firearm, any firearm which is not immediately recognizable as a firearm, any camouflaging firearm container, any ammunition which contains or consists of any flechette dart, any bullet containing or carrying an explosive agent, any ballistic knife, any multiburst trigger activator, any nunchaku, any short-barreled shotgun, any short-barreled rifle, any metal knuckles, any belt buckle knife, any leaded cane, any zip gun, any shuriken, any unconventional pistol, any lipstick case knife, any cane sword, any SHOBI ZUE, any air gauge knife, any writing pen knife, any metal military practice handgrenade or metal replica handgrenade, or any instrument or weapon of the kind commonly known as a blackjack, slungshot, billy, sandclub, sap, or sandbag

    Source: http://ag.ca.gov/firearms/dwcl/12020.php

    AC: cause don't want to mess with Ninja-Steve

    1. Anonymous Coward
      FAIL

      how is a nunchaku a firearm?

      Only in the US could you have a gun but not knife.

      1. MinionZero
        WTF?

        So you can't even have a slingshot?!

        ... let alone knives, nunchaku or shuriken ... but they still don't ban guns?!

        Wow, American leaders, time to learn about Cognitive Dissonance!

      2. Nexox Enigma

        Oh they'll let you have a knife...

        In California (most cities, anyhow) it's legal to concealed carry any length of folding blade knife, even those with spring assist opening. And it's one of the few states that allows real switch blades (limited to 2" blades.) In most cities (Not Los Angeles) it's even legal to open carry a sword, or multiple swords. Granted, that probably won't stop the cops from asking what the hell you're doing with a sword, and maybe just confiscating it to be on the safe (and illegal) side.

      3. Sooty

        Blame it on Bruce Lee!

        Or possibly the "hero" Turtles!

        I assume it was all down to the same 80's/90's "think of the children" ninja film* hysteria that caused them to be banned in the UK as well.

        *See it's nothing new, the the subject just changes very few years.

    2. Willie T
      WTF?

      California, our version of the "nanny state"

      This is why I don't live in California. Beautiful weather, crazy people. When they outlaw silly things like nunchaku and shuriken what's next? Rocks? Just look up microstamping of ammunition to see how far out of touch that state is with reality.

  9. Ian Stephenson
    Coat

    secret intimate knowledge of pressure points...

    Better known as Dim Mac - not to be confused with Dimm Sum.

    mmmmmm Dimm Sum....

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      or Dim Mak...

      ...depending on how you form the english. And it's chinese, not traditional ninjutsu (unless you follow that self styled Ninja, Ashida Kim crap...)

      Did mine under Hatsumi, Togakure Ryu...

      ...and shuriken are not 'death' stars, irritating at most. Unless poisened of course.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        @AC Ninja

        AC, I'm sure he knows it's normally 'Mak' in non-kanji, and was making a funny. 'Mac' - Steve Jobs, geddit?

        I thought it was Frank Dux who'd introduced Dim Mak into the ninja pantheon, with his brick trick...

        As a fellow Bujinkan student, I would say koppo is about as close as you get. Never studied under Soke Hatsumi, but met him twice, absolute gent. You're very lucky to have had the chance to learn from him.

        AC as I'm wearing my shinobi shozoku as I type... ;-)

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Ahh, I geddit

          Yep, missed the "Mac" jibe... :)

          Didn't get to train directly under Hatsumi unfortunately, but he is a gent, a real living legend - and quite funny at times too. Did some with Dave Heale back in Guildford.

          (;)

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This precise thing happened to me - but much better outcome...

    At Narita. I had bought a small shuriken in Kamakura as a gift for my daughter, who is into such things. packed it up against a stainless steel business card case. Was surprised they found it.

    The security folk were impeccably polite, but weren't going to let me through with the thing. I asked "Can I mail it?" She asked for my ticket (!) -- studied it carefully (why?) then said "Yes. Follow, please." Led me to the escalator down into that huge mall under the airport, showed me on a directory where the post office was. Made sure I knew how to get there, and how to get to my gate afterwards. She'd checked the ticket to be sure I had time.

    At the post office, they were also impeccably polite; helped me through all the paperwork - net result -- I mailed the shuriken back to USA for <$5.00

    I suspect this is a case of Mr Jobs stumbling over his ego. It's deservedly large -- but must be hard to drag around everywhere.

  11. lee harvey osmond

    Not shurikens...

    ... rather, prototype iPhones specially localised for the Japanese market.

    After all, was it not Naomi Campbell who, when handed a shuriken a while ago, examined it closely before asking "where do I insert the SIM card?"

    (allegedly)

  12. DrXym Silver badge

    No big deal

    I'm sure he could have snapped his fingers and a lackey would have instantly appeared to Fedex the throwing stars back to the US.

  13. Fred 21
    Stop

    Why can't he

    Just use his iPad to order some off the internet like everyone else does?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Or he could ...

      Just sharpen the edge of his iPad and throw that .. its built like a tank so will survive a throw and is even wipe clean.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Because

      Because the site uses flash...

  14. peyton?
    Heart

    He's just embarrassed

    During the search they probably found his custom-made Steve Jobs Moe pillow.

  15. David Simpson 1
    Jobs Horns

    Ninja for Dummies

    "If the enemy can find and confiscate your throwing stars then you blew it "

    - Ninja for Dummies

  16. kain preacher

    how is a nunchaku a firearm?

    its not and the law the AC is called the dangerous weapon act .

    1. Doug Glass
      Go

      Huh?

      Care to rephrase that so it makes sense?

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Um

    Story's been debunked, apparently. Can we have an update? Thought not. Congratulations are in order to the Reg, though, for continuing with its successful policy of generating clicks by mining the rich seam of readers who seem hapless in the face of their Freudian relationship of antipathy with Apple and Jobs and will fall over each other to click on anything even vaguely related in order to post a comment about how much they hate (want to have sex with) Jobs.

    PS: No, I don't have a Freudian relationship with Apple myself, although I do have one with the idiot segment of the Reg commentardship. I hate (want to have sex with) all of them.

    Paris, because Freudian.

    1. frymaster

      link?

      if what your saying is true - and I've no reason to suppose not - wouldn't it be an idea to acutally post the proof so the story can be updated?

  18. Richard Cartledge
    Joke

    Jobs the....

    Mutant Ninja Turtle-neck?

  19. Anonymous John

    Revenge?

    Expect the Apple iStar to be on sale by Christmas.

  20. W. Keith Wingate
    Troll

    He should have brought back an AK-47

    I * think* most US jurisdictions treat "martial arts weapons" (from nunchaku to shuriken, etc.) a bit like I believe the UK treats firearms: you can carry them to and from the dojo, concealed, and had better be prepared to explain that you teach / train w/ them, etc. That was also true in CA when I lived there, I think, but if you're caught casually walking around Cupertino w/ them, (especially these days when the laws on such things have tightened) I suspect you'd have a lot of "splaining" to do.

    Assault weapons in the US though, are not a problem....

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    "pure fiction" says Apple

    "Steve did visit Japan this summer for a vacation in Kyoto, but the incidents described at the airport are pure fiction. Steve had a great time and hopes to visit Japan again soon."

    So say All Things Digital.

    1. Arctic fox

      @""pure fiction" says Apple." You will excuse I am sure if........

      ........I do not regard a denial from Apple as decisive proof of anything. (Or for that matter from any other large company in the absence of any _independent_ confirmation.)

  22. Ilya 1
    Unhappy

    Wait... something doesn't make sense

    As much as Jobs is a jerk, why the hell does he need to go through a security checkpoint to fly on a private jet that he undeniably owns. Since US import law is not a concern of the Japanese security, it's insanely ridiculous that there is any item that they should stop him from bringing on board his own plane.

    I think I would be pretty angry too if something like this happened to me. Except maybe I would try to bring on a tiger, a flamethrower and a case of those $300 melons. What's the point of being stupidly rich and not being completely dumb about it?

    1. lglethal Silver badge
      Coat

      Its still a public airport champ...

      What is to stop someone (read: Would be terrorist), hiring a private jet, walking through carrying weapons, and claiming "Its my jet why cant i take them on?". If they're allowed through what is to stop those weapons being quietly handed over to "colleagues" who are boarding regular flights and thus allowing a terrorist incident.

      If he was flying from a private airfield, then it would be a different story but then as they as a general rule do not have security checkpoints and rely on tip offs to catch people smuggling contraband. As this story specifically says he was at a security checkpoint which implies that he was flying from a public airport and so would be mingling with mere mortals in the airport (it takes time to walk to the VIP lounge after all!) before boarding his aircraft...

      So good job to Japanese border police - Job well done!

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      @Ilya 1

      Because airside at any airport is a "sterile area", it's got nothing to do with the aircraft. Ground crew have to go through the same shit before they go airside, even though they're not boarding any plane.

  23. Haku

    Awww, don't worry, Steve,

    you can always make some origami ones...

    http://www.wikihow.com/Fold-an-Origami-Star-(Shuriken)

    1. SuperNintendoChalmers
      Happy

      Nice

      That just cost me 10 minutes, but well worth it.

  24. Player_16
    Alert

    He forgot to use his RDF.

    Moments later, the guards could be seen giving each other hi-5's, pumpin' the air and saying 'who's yo daddy!'

  25. Nudge
    Badgers

    the bootnote update

    behold! no mundane disappearing in a puff of smoke for ninja steve... he's gone and made the rest of the world disappear instead.

  26. Anonymous Coward
    Pirate

    this doesn't ring true

    i can't imagine the airport staff at narita dealing with such a high profile person in such a way

    having taken swords through narita a number of times the only problem was to provide evidence that they were shin-to and not culteral assets. each time the staff were incredibly helpful and extremely polite.

    shuriken (or more likely shaken) would have been placed in the check in or given in the care of the flight staff

    pirate cos pirates like swords but not ninjas

  27. Cameron Colley

    I dislike his Jobsworth as much as the next man.

    However, I am not quite sure how entering your own plane with your own possesions is a bigger terrorist threat than entering it without them, since you could have left them on board.

  28. Mark Jonson
    Thumb Up

    Retaliation

    Perhaps Steve should stop shipping Apple products to Japan. Either they'll relent from having the next piece of iJunk withheld from their possession and ship him his death stars, or he'll be doing the whole country a big favor and nobody from the Japanese government will question Steve Jobs' luggage contents again.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Coat

      RE: Retaliation

      Perhaps he should fold the Japanese iTunes store instead. It's not fair that they're the only one that has music, videos, etc while the rest of Asia only gets a more limited app-only store with half the apps missing.

      Coat, taxi, etc.

  29. Chas
    FAIL

    Bullshit!

    It's amazing what crap people believe without even the faintest sign of critical thinking.

    FYI, the story has already been proven false. Nice to see all the Apple trolls fall over this one (see above) and making total idiots of themselves, as usual.

    =:~)

    1. Anonymous John

      Nothing to do with Apple trolls.

      If this story had featured Bill gates, the story and comments would have been exactly the same.

  30. nsld
    Jobs Horns

    perhaps

    At his next press launch for the latest iShite they could play "enter the ninja" by Die Entwood !

  31. Steve Evans

    Don't blame Japan...

    Just remember what country introduced, and continues to push petty security restrictions and global paranoia...

    Hell, I can't even take a 125g jar or marmite in hand luggage... Attempts to argue the 125g is a measurement of mass and not volume, and the restriction is 100ml of volume fall of deaf ears too.

    1. lglethal Silver badge
      Joke

      No wonder...

      Have you noticed the intelligence level of most airport security guards? The fact they know which way to hold the metal detector correctly is a constant source of amazement to me and gives me hope that one day we will have our monkey butlers...

      They would never understand the difference betwen mass and volume...

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Sounds like a fine model for generating international publicity

    1) Pay an offshore tabloid news firm to run a verging-on-believable outrageous story about one's own celebrity

    2) Disclaim the event, courteously

    3) Reap the gains in popularity, as people run on and on about it... until the next "big news" thing, sure. If it results in a net popularity gain, that's return on investment.

    I honestly don't believe Apple would have to stoop to that, today, or ever would - they're far too focused on aesthetics to ever stoop to something so crass as a publicity stunt...one might suppose.

    Some other firms might feel as that it would serve them, to try such a "vapor" publicity stunt. Maybe it would even be entertaining.

    ....just throwing a bone out there, in a direction generally towards the west coast of the states. That should cover both Microsoft and Yahoo.

    In full disclosure: I do not own any stock in any publicly traded Asian-island tabloid magazines, and neither, in Microsoft nor Yahoo Inc.

    Mine's the one with a biography by PT Barnum in the pocket.

    Anonymous, because it is.

  33. sT0rNG b4R3 duRiD
    Jobs Horns

    As much as I'd like it to be true...

    I think it does not hold water. I mean, they would have to be 'very special' shuriken, as shuriken are quite easily available as far as I recall, in the US.

  34. This post has been deleted by its author

  35. Chris Hunt
    Jobs Horns

    Careful Now

    Trying to take away his ninja-toys could cause Steve to flip out and kill people.

    Now, who would win in a fight between Apple and The Pirate Bay?

  36. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    oh its from SPA

    it would have been easier to say

    the magazine that you would get if you merged hello! with the nation enquirer and printed it in japanese

    it must be true

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