Getting the police to pay
Cool. I might print out your proposed menu and stick it up just inside my front door so I'm ready to point them at it, just in case.
However, I wouldn't expect them to pay up. I remember reading about a case in which the UK police got the wrong address and smashed down the wrong front door. It was a listed property in a conservation area and cost the owner thousands to replace, but the police refused to pay for it and the owner had to sue. He didn't get his money back that way, either, though the tax payer ended up paying thousands more for the police to defend themselves in court.
And then there's the case where a farmer asked the police to pay for the damage they had caused when searching his field for evidence and the police response was to publicly name him (this was a high-profile case involving an abducted child) and accuse him of hindering their enquiries.
This is a serious problem, in my opinion, because the way things are the police are free to punish people and blackmail them by confiscating and destroying property, or threatening to do so, under the cover of gathering "evidence". They can smash your door down, steal all your computers, keep them for a couple of years and then drop all the charges, or, worse still, make you turn up in court with an expensive lawyer only to find that they are presenting no evidence against you, all with no compensation for you and no punishment for them.
We need a "pig" icon.