back to article God-blocking web filter ironically hard to find

Fed up with evangelicals thrusting their god-bothering ways upon you? Had enough of the religious right setting the agenda when it comes to deciding what you should – or shouldn’t – be allowed to look at on the internet? Then maybe Godblock is the package for you. For Godblock is the new anti-evangelical utility, "a web filter …

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  1. Stef 4
    Coffee/keyboard

    The Onion

    Surely this is from The Onion or Daily Mash, or some other satirical site?

    "When installed, GodBlock will test each page that your child visits before it is loaded, looking for ... names of religious figures, ... If none are found, then your child is allowed to browse freely."

    Peter, Paul, David, Jesus, Mary, Joseph, Mohammad (the most common name in the world?), are these all going to raise flags and block pages? Presumably, the poor child can't even access this article because of it content?

    1. Anton Ivanov
      Coat

      Lazarus Long has a saying

      One man's religion is another man's belly laugh.

      Me coat...

    2. LinkOfHyrule
      Coat

      The Register will be ****ed then...

      This site will be blocked as for some reason its full of the words "Jesus Phone" and "Judas Phone".

  2. Gordon is not a Moron

    It's just front

    it's a simple way of collecting the names of heritics and unbelievers, so that they can be tracked down and burnt at the stake. Well they are all going to hell anyway, so why not speed the process along.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Pint

    Fair enough

    I appreciate it's a bit tongue in cheek, but in this instance, unlike hardcore bongo flicks'n'pics, hopefully I will have given my kids enough nous to think for themselves, to make their own decisions, rather than me ramming my own athiest agenda down their throats.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Badgers

    They haven't thought this through, have they?

    Once it's installed, how will you visit their site for upgrades, support etc?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    are you sure it is not a scam?

    because it behave like one.

    any way, how many pages out there that are non-religious yet have some religious text in it. I mean, even some p0rn will include some religious words ( ex. "oh! god!").

    if the program is going to block all webpages include some religious text (assuming it is *real*), then an overwhelming part of the web would be blocked. Including history sites! for that matter, even scientific sites that try to discuses "science vs religion" would be blocked.

    heck, even the name of the program itself have a religious reference.

    1. JimC

      Scam's a bit strong...

      Assuming the T shirts and stickers they are flogging actually exist that is.

  6. peyton?

    I think they've found

    A fantastic way to market their shirts?

  7. Robert Ramsay

    seems fairly straightforward to me

    If no-one can find it, then it doesn't exist because it's a wind-up.

    1. frank ly

      You Gotta Have Faith Robert

      "If no-one can find it, then it doesn't exist ...."

      You are wrong, so wrong! If you can't find it then it is simply beyond your ability and understanding at this point in your life. You must strive to find it and get closer to it in your daily life. Open your eyes and let Godblock into your heart and you will truly find eternal salvation.

  8. SlabMan

    Still waiting to hear back from Media March?

    Since they are 'a broadly pro-Christian organisation ', you may need to uninstall GodBlock first.

  9. IR

    Excellent

    satire by doing the exact same thing from the opposite point of view, highlighting the absurdities in pro-Christian netnanny software.

  10. sisk

    Seems like a joke

    And El Reg seems to have fallen for it.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The title is required, and must contain letters and/or digits.

    You can try and suppress dangerous and frankly absurd views, like those espoused by religions and groups like the BNP, but is it not best to expose the stupidity of their arguments so that people can see freely how ridiculous their views are?

    Mmm, then again, it seems large amounts of the population HAVE seen the absurdity of religion and STILL sign up for it.

    Perhaps the best thing is to ban children from religion, or being fed religious doctrine, until they reach the age of 18.

    I went to a Catholic baptism recently....seeing a 3 year old asked if they took Jesus into their heart, renounced the devil etc. really highlighted how fucked-up these processes are. You wouldn't make a 3 year old sign up to Conservative or Labour ideologies and make thinly veiled threats if they ever leave their "chosen" party, but apparently it's Ok for religion to do this.

    Perhaps best to give your child a copy of the bile (or q'ran or whatever) and a copy of the God Delusion and see what makes sense if you apply logic, and what makes sense if you suspend logic.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Jobs 2:3:16

    Thou shalt not denounce the good works of the Apple

    1. LinkOfHyrule
      Joke

      Jobs 2:4:12

      Thou shalt not grip firmly thy iPhone 4 or forever be commended to lost signal!

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    God Blocker [tm]

    Guaranteed 100% effective against and superfluous supernatural entity, omnipotent or otherwise.

    Are you sitting comfortably?

    Then just place the God Blocker [tm] on your head and we'll begin.

    Can you feel the love of god?

    Can you feel your prayers reaching the almighty?

    Do you have a desire to preach to and/or proselytise your fellow man?

    Is your intelligence being replaced by strange irrational thoughts?

    If you answered NO to all these questions then the God Blocker [tm] is for you at an introductory, one time offer of $499.99

    God Blocker[tm]

    Blocks God, or your money (and soul) back.

  14. Dale 3

    you can support the project by purchasing Godblock stickers

    Typical, they just want your money!

  15. Robert Carnegie Silver badge

    Websense has (had?) a "Traditional Religion" block category

    But that only blocks addresses, not content.

    There's also a separate "New Age" category.

    A decent product will allow the nanny to choose to unblock specific approved sites.

  16. David McMahon
    Joke

    Date?

    It's not April yet!

    The quotes give it away!

    http://www.godblock.com/#feedback

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Dawkin's block to follow up ?

    me, well I will carry on and use the filtering in my brain that ( hopefully usually ) kicks in when some idiot is making presumptive statements of fact without any believable evidence to back it up.

    on an aside, when are there going to be free neuroleptic drugs issued at the church-door to anyone going inside ? Because to me this seems like a good place to dish them out, since the people going in MUST be deluded. They could be marked as "pills for true believers" .

  18. Eddy Ito

    Just a little tweak

    Are you a devout Catholic who is tired of seeing those pagan hoards in the holy web? Sick of surfing through the pages of gentiles searching for sites a good Jew can call home? Do infidels have you pointed in the wrong direction and get you down five times a day?

    Now your time has come! Get FalseGodBlock! today! Simply set the filter to the religion of your choice and impose your invisible friend on all the internet! It's that easy to restore your faith on mankind! Remember, God and FalseGodBlock! are on your side! Have your credit card handy and call now, operator is standing by.

  19. MattMarcSmith

    It's satire

    I 'Stumbled' on this site about a week ago. It is indeed satirical and El Reg has been taken hook, line and sinker.

    I wonder what Media March will say when they respond to a request for comment... ;)

  20. LaeMing

    Irrespective of whether it is legit.

    I am sooooo tempted to order a few shirts and buttons for delivery to certain Australian parliamentarians.

  21. BogBrick

    The point of the joke is the website - not that there's actually a filter

    Not everything is to be taken literally - if you are blogging that "there's no download" you missed the joke.

    It's as easy as (1) read the text on the website (2) laugh (3) go on with your day (and maybe buy some stickers).

  22. Buzzby
    Big Brother

    Nice Idea

    If this is kosher I like it.

    Certainly in the past the religious right controled s/w companies developing filtering s/w.

    Of course their block lists were not available for perusal.

    I think fundamentalism, religious or political, the most dangerous of ideas.

  23. skeptical i

    Sloppy execution?

    The hand in the logo would seem to have five fingers plus a thumb ... is this is an accident or deliberate statement that buh- LEEEvers (or deities) are six- fingered mutants?

  24. JC 2
    FAIL

    Censorship For The Win!

    I just LOVE it when people try to feign intellectualism by suggesting others should censor what that individual doesn't like. Wouldn't it be easier if those individuals just created a block that only shows what they DO like? Seems like it would cut to the chase a bit quicker.

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Troll

    Punk'd?

    Sounds like something Joey Skaggs will pull off.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joey_Skaggs

    I call fake.

  26. Tim Bates

    Aside from the fact that Godblock is likely a joke...

    It's ironic when people get themselves so worked up into anti-religion that they end up making it into a religion of it's own...

    I do wonder sometimes whether some of the more religious anti-religion types will simply implode one day.

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    we could do with "utter bollocks block"

    if it worked, that would block most of the above comments, 90% of the Reg, and all religions the world over.

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