back to article Piles for Windows - a pain in the arse?

Those of you who reckon Windows is a pain in the arse will enjoy this confirmation of the fact from Dragonshorn Studios: Well, we reckon Dragonshorn might want to rethink that name. Chalfonts for Windows? Works for us. ®


This topic is closed for new posts.
  1. Cameron Colley

    I still don't quite get what it's for...

    It just looks like shortcuts to directories to me -- with files ordered with most recent on top. I thought most windowing systems allowed that now?

    Also, how do you shear a dragon?

    1. Marvin the Martian

      I had the same reaction.

      But the name suggests the shearing lies in the past, and probably best not to talk about it.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: I had the same reaction.

        Try Googling "Piles".

        IIRC - I lived in the US for a couple of years - "Piles" is not part of American-English vernacular.

        So I guess only British English people may be in on this.

        1. JEDIDIAH

          2 go in, only 1 comes out.

          ...yes. Would have not realized that they might be referencing the "Preparation H" sort of stuff with that name. Thanks Google.

          Once again proving: Two nations can be separated by a common language.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Guys got awesome taste in anime

    kissxsis (delicious twin step sister goodness almost certainly illegal in the UK) and maid-sama, awesome shoujo comedy win.

    1. jodyfanning

      Clean piles?!

      Yep, maybe they should have cleaned their piles before making the demo :-)

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward


        he loses points for using fffpeeps, wait a bit longer and get Eclipse subs instead.

  3. Peter Black


    ... might be a good name....

  4. Anonymous Coward

    Problem with the article

    "Those of you who reckon Windows is a pain in the arse"

    Anyone who doesn't probably hasn't got the ability to read, so they won't be on El Reg.

    Of course, it's possible (but unlikely) that they just might not have used a different operating system before and don't know any better...

    1. Chris Collins


      I am making a pulsating gesture with my hand gripped into an open fist. If you've read this far maybe you could guess what it is, AC? I am pretty sure there is a spambot that just posts this sort juvenile "Windoze, hurr" bollocks in every thread.

  5. Efros
    Thumb Up

    We should

    Send a crate of Anusol to Balmer.

  6. Elmer Phud

    Farmers for Windows

    What - another indexing service that just points to recently modified files?

    Isn't that a bit like using Windows search with 'recently updated' selected?

    Can't I just leave the search results open and hit F5 now and then?

    Don't I have two or three efficient downloadres already in F/Fox?

    Have I missed something?

  7. Anonymous Coward

    Cue the music

    OS user..."this is a blatant ripoff of xxx in OS yyy"

    Other OS user..."no, this is a blatant ripoff of xxx in OS yyy"

    Older OS user..."this is actually a blatant ripoff of xxx in OS zzz"

    Ancient OS user..."you're all wrong, this is actually a blatant ripoff of xxx in OS xyz"

    ...repeat ad-infinitum

  8. Christopher Martin


    So, it's a panel widget that shows the top n files in a directory sorted by modified date.

    Why did I have to wach a video to discover that?

  9. Juan Inamillion

    It must be Friday


    Maybe 'Farmers for Windows' or 'Grapes for Windows'.

    So any problems with this 'soft'ware and you apply Preparation 'H' for Windows?

    'Roid-O-Buff' for Windows

    I could go on but I need to lie down...

  10. Sam 8


    The Ceramics?

    The Nurembergs?

    The Dukes?

    The Ipcresses?

    The Farmers?

  11. Dan P

    The Name's Amusing...

    Er... but then so is the product by the looks of it. Are they really trying to suggest that the half a second or so involved in getting to a folder that you don't have open is such a productivity killer, and requires you to spend ten minutes or so setting something up that supposedly makes it easier?

    But yeah, cue the 'Does navigating to you folders leave you feeling like you're sitting on a cold floor? Get Piles!' jokes.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Umm, yes, actually..

      "Are they really trying to suggest that the half a second or so involved in getting to a folder that you don't have open is such a productivity killer"

      You clearly haven't looked at how MS Office is always being sold to management. "Saving xx seconds a day amounts to xx days per annum and thus our software is effectively free" - neatly omitting as usual that having to hunt for where the w*nkers put the functions this time means you lose more time than you will ever gain. IMHO, that's the best argument ever to install OpenOffice - it changes less per version because there's no marketeer trying to justify a new version.

      On that topic: every new version of Windows and MS Office means learning a new interface. If you'd invested that time in switching to Linux or OSX you *would* have saved in productivity because of less downtime. But hey, that would be smart..

  12. paulf

    The title is required, and must contain letters and/or digits.

    Hmmm. I can't help but call pedantic grammar nazi alert on the captions using:


    "to quickly open"

    I can't help thinking that Dragon's horn probably isn't the best treatment for the old Chalfont St Gemmeroids.

    But hey its a Friday. Can I select the beer icon also?

  13. sT0rNG b4R3 duRiD
    Paris Hilton

    Maybe their PR/Advertising person...

    ... is Engrish?

  14. Z 1


    Does the software come with a complementary blow up rubber ring?

  15. Blubster

    @Sam 8


    Nobby's (Stiles)

    A touch of the Bee Gees (Bum Grapes)

    Atomics etc, etc,...

    Tried pessaries once for my Farmers - One after breakfast, one after supper. Didn't work. For what good they did, I may as well stuffed them up my arse.

  16. Morpho Devilpepper

    A pain where??

    If you think Windows is a pain in the arse, it's probably user error. Easy mistake I guess...the disc is shaped for a rather different slot though.

  17. Ianz

    Reminds me of a presentation made to me many years ago....

    The poor guy was trying to sell a physical access security system to us back in the mainframe days. Unfortunately all though his presentation he kept referring to it as "the latest in rectal recognition technology". He never realised his mistake - even when we asked him if it was only suitable for brown eyes.....

  18. heyrick Silver badge

    Epic Fail!

    Not only is he running his demo in a directory with most likely downloaded videos present, but he tries to cover it up, somewhat pointedly, with YouTube annotation boxes. Switch to 720p and annotations off, and his hentai animé fettish is all crystal clear...

    KissxSis - 09 / Kaichou wa Maid-sama 09 / KissxSis - 08 Uncensored / KissxSis - 07 / Transformers.Revenge.of.the.Fallen.DVDRip


  19. Gordon 11

    Think of others

    I suspect my wife woudl like this. Once she downloads something she doesn't always remember where it's gone, so the ability to find it quickly in an application menu just afterwards *would* be useful to her. (Apparently not everyone keeps a mental image of a directory hierarchy - shocking I know, but true).

    As for the name - well, it's got it some publicity at least.

    1. Lionel Baden

      why not

      Tell her not to close the download window


      you can always take the computer out of the kitchen !

      OH SNAP !!!!

  20. Gaz 5
    Thumb Up

    I want it!

    But only if it plays that music, just to make something so mundane seem awesome :)

  21. C 2

    LOL what a waste of time!

    This would be even more useless on an XP box. How hard is it to change the DL location in Firefox?!

    Notice also that they've got the Firefox download manager set to auto close LOL, of course you can't see what you've downloaded that way!

    Better yet, just use a version of windows that doesn't take 6 extra steps to get *anything* done.

    Oh and yet *another* useless search indexer to help your quad core 3ghz machine run like an old 486.

  22. Astarte

    What's in a name?

    'Piles' is the cut-down version of another program; it was going to be called ‘HaemorrhoidsLite'.

This topic is closed for new posts.

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2021