back to article ThinkGeek trembles before Pork Board's pork sword

The wags down at ThinkGeek have found themselves on the receiving end of the "best-ever cease and desist letter", after seriously treading on the National Pork Board's trotters. ThinkGeek's canned unicorn meat ThinkGeek's offence was committed in the marketing of its quite remarkable Canned Unicorn Meat, a truly magical …


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  1. SuperTim


    Their complaint is that OTHER websites infringe on their slogan? Also, they don't seem to be bothered about the fact that this product is clearly NOT REAL!

    I love lawyers, they make the rest of society feel better about themselves.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Up

      99% of lawyers...

      ...give the rest a bad reputation.

  2. John H Woods Silver badge

    I suppose there's never any dilemma ...

    ... where unicorns are concerned.

  3. Graham Bartlett

    But surely...

    Long pig is "the other white meat". Or what Hillary Briss the butcher in League of Gentlemen calls "the special stuff".

    Although there are strong claims for cat (aka "roof rabbit" for the Dutch during WWII occupation) as "the other white meat". But finger food that's really fingers has definitely got the prior claim.

  4. NB
    Paris Hilton

    title? meh

    I will now forever be haunted by thoughts of what unicorn meat might taste like... no barbecue will ever be truly complete again..

    Damn you ThinkGeek, what does sparkly unicorn flesh taste of?!

    Paris cos... well, do I even need to say?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      'what does sparkly unicorn flesh taste of?!'

      A little like griffin.

    2. TeeCee Gold badge

      Doesn't really matter.

      The canned version'll be crap anyway.

      For a barbeque, you'd be better off with Chimera. It's the lazy beggar's mixed grill.......

  5. irish donkey


    Is anyone else getting pissed of by the pop up for silver light which never seems to install no matter how many time you click install

  6. Shane Lusby


    Parody is well protected as freedom of speech. They should have told the porkies to spin on it and run the article again.

    1. Franklin

      Not a copyright issue

      This is a common place where people get confused.

      In the US, parody is specifically protected under copyright law. However, trademark law is a very, very different matter. Trademark and copyright are not related to each other (trademark is actually a subset of patent law).

      Here in the States, there is absolutely no protection from trademark infringement for parody. Furthermore, owners of trademark have no choice about pursuing infringement. Under US trademark law, if I own a trademark and I DON'T pursue someone who infringes it--even if the infringement is trivial or silly--I lose my trademark.

      Companies don't like going after this sort of thing. It's a waste of money, time, and resources, and it subjects them to ridicule from people who don't understand trademark law. But they have to. If they don't, they lose their trademark. Stupid as it is, that's the way the law is written.

      1. Across-the-pond Scum

        That may be... but...

        A 12 page C&D for something like this is obviously not necessary. You can scope it down to a page and still be "protecting" your trademark, and without the death of a couple of trees in the process as they 1) faxed it and 2) printed it out and sent it certified mail.

        Just some more excess trimmings from the NPB.

        1. Hugh Jorgen

          Sum it up, don't waste 12 pages.

          Dear ThinkGeek,

          Stop it. Just stop it right now. Unicorn meat my arse!

          Fuck with our trademark slogans and we'll 'open a can of

          WHOOPASS' (tm) Stonecold Steve Austin (threat used under license courtesy of the WWE)

          Go out and get some sun.

          Fuckin stoners......


          The Pork Board

          There, now about my fee.......

  7. Dan P

    Only in...

    ...America. Doh.

  8. DT

    in a culture of litigation...

    I'm amazed the confederated chicken and turkey producers association haven't sued: Pork is white meat, in the same way Bill Bailey is a vegetarian.

    "I'm a vegetarian. I'm not strict; I eat fish, and duck. Well, they're nearly fish, aren't they? They're semi-submerged a lot of the time, they spend a lot of time in the water, they're virtually fish, really. And pigs, cows, sheep, anything that lives near water, I'm not strict."

    So Bacon is ironic white meat and Chops are post modern drumsticks.

    Why are the pork board trying to sell their product as something that it isn't, rather than focusing on it's strengths?

    Pigs: they're porkilicious!

    Job done. Yet, no doubt some marketeer got paid a bundle to lie to the public (which is what they're expert at; whilst not ripping off each other's ideas). Mafia polar bear pushing birdseye... not in any way related to the Mafia panda recommending fox's biscuits? Although in the later case an actual fox would be more imposing: "buy these biscuits or your kids might have a nasty accident; capische?

  9. Richard IV

    Fowl play.

    The NPB are too chicken to go after the white meat that they are "The Other" to.

    Perhaps they thought they'd chase ThinkGeek for something other than a poultry sum.

    Why's that cane coming from stage left?

  10. Eden


    "The other white meat" is a phrase that's been around since I was a nipper and always used in parody.

    Cats, the other white meat.

    Babies, the other white meat.

    Jehovas witnesses, The other white meat.

    and so and and so forth.

  11. Paul RND*1000


    The other other white meat?

    Except it isn't really white, it looks more like radioactive corned beef to me.

    Unicorn, the other sparkly meat (post-"Eclipse" vampire being the first, obviously)?

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Jobs Horns

    Unicorn Blood

    Do they sell the unicorn blood to Lord Voldemort?

  13. Anonymous Coward

    Read the 'apology', too funny

    I love apologies that are more of a bitch slap than an actual apology, but can never actually be proven to not be an apology !!

    I also thought that the potential trade mark was "The other white meat" and not "The new white meat"?

    And on April 1st too !!!

    Come on... seriously... trade mark protection ??? Seriously ???

    1. Grivas Bo Diddly Harm
      Thumb Up

      MMMMVelopes (bacon flavoured envelopes)

      Bacon Lip Balm has me, well, licking my lips, I suppose.

      Perhaps you could finish off such a lovely meal with a Unicornetto Ice Cream.

      Well worth a read, a quite marvellous apology. Heartfelt and sincere.

  14. ngcomputing

    White Meat

    A few years back, when the movie March of the Penguins movie came out, I did some t-shirts for Cafe-Press that said "Penguins, the other white meat" it took them (Pork Council) about 72 hours to contact me with a cease and desist...or else.

    I guess if you get "The other white meat" tattooed on your butt, they would literally own your ass.

  15. John Dougald McCallum

    National pork barrel

    They are also going after a breastfeeding blog for very similar reasons so they have form on this sort of foolishness they were issuing the slogan "The other White Milk" as this is the colour of most milk except kangaroos that is pink apparently

  16. h 6

    White meat my ass!

    Pork is technically red meat. It's just a lie to make us think pork is more healthy than beef. but it's pretty much the same. Bastards.

  17. tony trolle

    they missed this one

    baby the other white meat

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