Can you please press for a CEOP REPORT (aka PANIC NOW!) button in children's bedrooms so they can report parental abuse and other, ahem, abuse from favourite uncles.
Can you press moan and wail for a PANIC NOW! button in classrooms for children that feel they are being abused by their teachers. Such abuse can be a lot different to a guy trying to cop a feel of his favourite fluffy schoolgirl. I was made to sit in the corner facing away from the class and to not speak to anybody. Months later, I was transferred to a school for children with learning problems (and finally, somebody noticed I might need sight correction too). Does this count as a viable form of abuse, or are you only interested in people thinking dirty thoughts about children?
I guess you really ought to have a little GSM-enabled PANIC NOW! button to stick on to magazines and videos, especially those of Japanese origin. Hell, affix them to everything that isn't the Beano, you don't know who might be offended these days by a drawing of a girl of indeterminate age in her nightie...
And, finally, can we please please please have a PANIC NOW! button on the CEOP website so people can click it to report themselves prior to engaging in a destructive unfounded witchhunt because all of you are too chicken to try to work on the real cause of the problem. A little PANIC NOW! button isn't going to change the world, stop trying to pretend that it is.
By the way, are you ceop.police.uk or ceop.gov.uk? And should we trust online reporting to an organisation with a blatant error on their front page (external newsfeed: msxml3.dll error '80072efd') set up by a government notorious for losing personal data, including those of children, not to mention the lurking disaster that is ContactPoint. As was recently demonstrated to El Reg, the authorities are moving away from server-based data access to zipping files around by memory stick or, cough, email. Practically ZERO traceability. If El Reg's reporter passed it to a friend who passed it to a friend who... you get the idea, personal data doing the rounds with no audit and no safeguards and yet you government types want to sit on Facebook etc? Get your own bloody house in order first, and make a big part of that educating PARENTS to what social networking websites actually mean. Educate PARENTS that letting children loose on a computer with scant supervision is not the way to do things. Don't whine "oh, I don't understand", computers are not difficult, they are just obtusely literal and finickety. If you can drive a car and understand all those signs and markings in the road, you can figure out Facebook. And best of all, you can tell your child "never talk to strangers" applies just as equally to people that aren't right there. This needs an awareness and education that isn't going to be resolved by a simple "I feel this is dodgy, let me report it" button.
So, CEOP. Less noise please, and more action. No, no, not against Facebook, but against parents and supervisors who let children willy-nilly around Facebook et al unsupervised.