back to article Swiss prostitutes armed with defibrillators

Prostitutes in the picturesque Swiss lakeside town of Lugano are adding defibrillation to their list of services following the death of several elderly punters whose hearts just couldn't take the pace. According to the Corriere della Sera, there are currently 38 brothels and sex clubs in the Lugano area, and more are planned …


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  1. MnM


    Thanks, I was just wondering about that.

  2. Professor Tinklepants
    Thumb Up

    I'm sure I won't be the first to say..

    ..Playmobil, or it didn't happen!!

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Naturally, the answer is a dead punter is a punter less and missed earnings. From the clients' point of view, this might be seen slightly differently. It must not be a prostitute but otherwise what's better for a death?


    1. Anonymous Coward
      Paris Hilton

      Lost revenue

      If my understanding is correct, it is normal practise in this profession to get paid up-front for services to be delivered, with any additional extras paid for afterwards. Therefore I would have thought the premature expiration of a customer would save the professional from having to perform the cpntracted for services. As such contracts are usually always verbal there would be no recompense to the deceased's estate.

      Paris because she knows how to deliver a professional service

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward electricity

    A hand job and 1,500 volts.


  5. Anonymous Coward

    health advice

    a pensioner who suffered a heart attack while enjoying Lugano's delights with the aid of "pharmaceutical assistance".

    Note to oldies - Amyl Nitrate for sexually aroused pensioners is not clever.

    1. frank ly

      re, health advice

      "Note to oldies - Amyl Nitrate for sexually aroused pensioners is not clever."

      Probably not, but I'm sure this "pharmaceutical assistance" is a reference to Viagra which, I have read, has led to an upswell and a persistent, measurable rise in oldie-sex, of both the amateur and the paid-for kind.

  6. Anonymous Coward

    Sounds like an opportunity for some diversification

    after all, the application of large electric shocks to the genitals is a very popular fetish. Erm, so I'm told.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Can't they just...

    ... let them die happy?

  8. Bob Greenwood

    Hookers with Defibrillators

    That's shocking!

  9. Graham Marsden
    Thumb Up

    Let's hear it for common sense.

    Meanwhile, of course, sex workers in this country would probably be being prosecuted for manslaughter in a ridiculous belief that this would "send a message" to other women to "discourage them" from entering the sex trade...

  10. Ricky H


    too right. this joins the top 5 ways to go :)

  11. Alex-TheManfromUncle


    Breaks the ol' heart thinking of the girls needing to take a defib to work..

    Thanks, mine's the one with the protection in the pocket.

  12. David Given
    Dead Vulture


    Defibrillation, surely?

  13. LinkOfHyrule


    "The Corriere della Sera says the local red light trade is worth around €70m a year. Eighty per cent of the punters are Italian, largely serviced by girls from South America and, increasingly, Eastern Europe."

    See, proof that the Swiss really are at the centre of international 'Trade'.

  14. ratfox
    Paris Hilton

    How sad to die on a co... concub...

    cucumber sandwich...


    (Am I really the first with a PH icon?)

  15. elderlybloke
    Paris Hilton

    Remember Girls

    After they get zapped , it is Mouth to Mouth and nothing else

    PS I carry a facemask in my car in case I encounter a Cardiac Arrest, as mouth to mouth is not at all pleasant. Even if it was to Paris.

  16. Emilio Desalvo

    Or else...

    TicinoNews says that there is an increasing number of Italian housewives and clerks who are crossing to Ticino and a different career track, driven by the crisis.

  17. John Smith 19 Gold badge

    Adds a whole new meaning to the term

    a full service operation.

    Mine is the somewhat under washed raincoat.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    joking aside

    In answer to all the "why".. consider the poor girls, it's probably psychologically rough to start with, selling yourself- but having someone have a heart attack and die on you could be pretty haunting.

    Moreover, an elderly punter visiting a pretty young girl is likely to be putting his cardio-vascular system under unusual strain, and is at hugely elevated risk.

    It's a pragmatic decision, which likely good for both service users and the girls. Protecting the health of the latter is a must as it's something that isn't going to stop. Morally censorious attempts to drive it underground just put the lives of those involved, both from disease and violence. Remember that they're still people, someone's sister, daughter, maybe even mum.

    (Yes, I know there are male prostitutes too, adjust as appropriate. Everyone deserves decent treatment, and if they're at the bottom of the pile, that doesn't make it OK to ignore them)

    Sorry, that was all a bit preachy, but I feel strongly about this.

  19. Alan Ferris

    Surely SOMEONE has to ask...

    ... How much extra does that cost?

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