back to article Swedish lactating bloke's dream turns sour

The Swedish dad who's spent the last few months attempting to squeeze milk from his breasts has thrown in the towel, with nothing more than "sore breasts" to show for his efforts. Student Ragnar Bengtsson, 26, said that male lactation "could prove very important for men's ability to get much closer to their children at an …

COMMENTS

This topic is closed for new posts.
  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    ¹

    What a tit.

    1. SirTainleyBarking
      Paris Hilton

      Harrrumph! These people who post first!

      I wanted that line!

      Paris well she has a couple, allegedly

  2. Svantevid
    WTF?

    Whut?

    "male lactation could prove very important for men's ability to get much closer to their children at an early stage"

    There are times when I think I can understand the Taliban. My wife and me have clearly defined roles... she doesn't try to hunt mammoths, I don't try to breast-feed the baby.

  3. tony72
    IT Angle

    Hormones

    Male to female transsexuals taking female hormones can grow boobs, and are known to lactate, I've seen it in a...I mean, so I hear. No idea if it would ever go far enough to keep a baby fed.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    The romans!

    ...ok, so we can agree that he can't actually have babies on account of not having a womb, which is nobody's fault - not even the Romans.

    But we can fight for his RIGHT to have babies!

  5. Chris Bradshaw

    Won't someone think of the children?

    Seriously - Mummy is for breastfeeding, Daddy is for more fun stuff (being tossed in the air, climbing onto his head, throwing food at, etc...).

  6. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    What a doofus!

    All that time "pumping his moobs" when he could have just taken a course of oxytocin and been away.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Interesting, but...

    Interesting article...but, where's the TIT angle?

    Mine's the one with the milk stains.

  8. Frizz
    Troll

    Ouch!

    ow..oW..OW....OUCH!! My eyes are watering already!

  9. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    Nature 1 - Idiots 0

    Our sex clearly defines our abilities as far as child-rearing functions are concerned. Women bear children and feed them, men spread their DNA and provide for their offspring.

    Period.

    Any reference to drug-induced man boobs is naught without proper referencing and links to prove it, so I'm sorry Tony72, but your post is not valid, funny though it may be.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    (untitled)

    Well: so long as he enjoyed himself.

  11. Disco-Legend-Zeke
    Pint

    Wrong Approach

    as tony 72 said, where's the hormones?

    simply pumping at them will not produce results, but male and female mammals are both endowed with the proper hardware for lactation, all that's need is the proper software (eg. hormones.)

    beer because the HOPS in beer mimics estrogen and builds moobs.

  12. disgruntled yank

    @pascal

    Estrogen is produced produced when testosterone breaks down; hence the impressive bust-lines one used to see among steroid users in the NFL. (At least, the chemistry is correct, and the shapes were there.) I don't think any sportswriters were rash enough to ask 300+ pound, roid-raging linemen about lactation, though.

  13. gfs

    Blinding

    What an excellent turn of phrase:

    Magnus Talib, "a lot of people were almost blinded with disgust"

    Disgust induced myopia, fabulous!

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Why

    Do men have nipples?

    1. Rosco

      Stephen Jay Gould

      The late Stephen Jay Gould wrote an excellent mini-essay on the subject of useless physical phenmonena, namely nipples on men and the orgasm in women. It all boils down to embryology, apparently. But the best part was the title: "Male Nipples and Clitoral Ripples", which Stephen's wife came up with after the publisher balked at Stephen's first title "Tits and Clits"

    2. frank ly

      @AC 17:06 re. Why

      Just in case they want to become women later on.

    3. TheMountain

      Re: why nipples

      Human embryos are sex-undifferentiated from a physical structure standpoint for several months during development, but the nipple structure is present early on. Just as the genitals are analogous between the sexes (with different parts more or less developed and in different ways), so too breast development differentiates later through hormone production. In other words we all get everything to make either male or female bodies, and which side gets activated by hormones is determined by chemicals. More efficient to standardize the chassis and determine configuration by setting different switches, I guess.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Black Helicopters

      re: Why

      For attaching the electrodes during a "special interrogation" session, obviously!

    5. mr.K

      Because

      Because we men are actually women with a chromosome disorder.

      Think about it.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Wouldn't it have been easier to

    have just bottle fed - lots of women turn to it when their nipples get sore, or does he have a thing about mashing his nipples and needed to find a reason to do it?

  16. a non-mouse cow heard

    Think I found the guy....

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysGzJfPIxNY

    its just wrong.....

  17. proto-robbie
    Linux

    No moob synthesis then?

    Not the only man to have trouble expressing himself...

    Tux, 'cos daddy penguins know fish works better.

  18. Shaun Hunter
    Go

    Nobody told him about prolactin?

    He's probably to much of a hippy-douche to "use chemicals", so never mind.

  19. rciafardone
    WTF?

    No one told him?

    No one told him that along with stimulation it was necesary a hormonal treatment for that to work?

    Or hi is just nutty?

  20. markp 1
    FAIL

    fail to do research

    Step one: Realise that manual stimulation will do nothing much, as it'll be little more than what (non steroidal) bodybuilders and/or marathon runners undergo. And they're lactating, like, all the time. Not.

    Step two: Realise hormones of some kind will be necessary, and this WILL result in near-irreversible (without moob-reduction surgery) growth. There are many paths available, from pills to herbs to beer to topical creams (that hopefully avoid some of the systemic effects that the others would have).

    Step three: Realise some other guy has already beaten you to the punch using step two. I'm dead certain on having at least read in a book of oddities about an american who wished to breastfeed his child after his wife died giving birth, so hit up a drastic course of hormones and was fully enmoobed by the end of the year (though that was probably just in time for baby to get teeth and start weaning... not to mention the problem of undersized nippleage). However when I try googling for such an account all I get is this article's titular herbert.

    There was another who did it for a bet - and won it, but liked the swollen chesticles so much that he kept them - but I can't be certain that wasn't just implants rather than the fully functional real deal.

  21. Jason Yau
    Joke

    You could say

    his plan went tits up.

This topic is closed for new posts.

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2022